I don't own Cowboy Bebop and I don't own the song "Mindfields"



"Uuhhhhh...." Spike groaned and turned over, rolling off the couch.

"Ooowwww..." he groaned again as he tried to push himself off the ground, his vision fading in and out, his head pounding like there was a pair of little twin drummers having a great time in his skull. He gave up, collapsing.

"Hangover, huh?" said a voice from above him. "I told you not to drink so much last night." Searing pain slashed through Spike's head as light flooded the room.

"Close...the..blinds..." he managed to get out through all of his pain.

"Wow, that must be some hell of a hangover. Come on baby, I've got something that'll fix you right up."

Spike listened as the footsteps headed in the direction of the kitchen, and attempted to roll onto his back.

He had just managed to push himself up into sitting position when a glass of something was pushed in front of his face.

"What is this?" he asked, apprehension showing on his face as he surveyed the egg and whatever monstrosity in front of him.

"A Prairie Oyster."

"A wha?"

"Prairie Oyster. 1 whole egg, 1 1/2 ounce brandy, a dash of Worcestershire sauce, 2 dashes vinegar, a dash of Tabasco sauce, and a pinch of salt and pepper for flavor."

Spike smelled the concoction distastefully. "Bleh," he said with a grimace.

Estelle smiled prettily at him. "Just drink it," she said as she grabbed his nose with one and forced him to drink the drink with the other.

After Spike had finished the prairie oyster and successfully managed to keep it down, he turned to Estelle and stated, "That was disgusting."

She smiled at him again, "Yeah, but your headache is gone, isn't it?"

Spike shook his head carefully, and to his surprise the hangover was nearly gone. He looked up into Estelle dark brown eyes in amazement.

Estelle chuckled a bit, "Now, maybe we'll be able to out of the apartment before noon."



Session 12: Mindfields



"Ooohhhh....Spike, let's go see this one!" Estelle exclaimed, dragging Spike around by the arm.

"Estelle, do we really have to see a movie?" Spike asked wearily. He had been dragged around the mall for two hours straight, and he didn't think that he could stand spending another two inside a cramped and smelly movie theater. "Maybe we could just go home and watch a movie there. It's a lot cheaper," he asked hopefully.

"No way, Spike. I'm not going to sit through another one of your Bruce Lee movies. I can't believe I actually let you talk me into watching old crap like that." She began rifling through her purse for some money, since Spike never carried much with him, not noticing Spike's glare.

Her comment had pissed off Spike a little bit. Nobody called a Bruce Lee an old piece of crap.

"Besides, I've got something to talk to you about." Spike found himself staring into her brown eyes again.

"What?" Spike asked, somewhat annoyed.

Estelle looked down and started fiddling with her purse. "Ummm....I'm not sure how to put this...but...ummm...I think I'm pregnant."

"What?!" Spike said. "You're pregnant?" he asked in disbelief.

She smiled at him, "Yeah, I found out this morning. I went to the doctor's before you woke up."

Spike was silent.

Estelle continued, "Isn't this great! We finally have the excuse to leave this filthy planet! We can get married and live happily ever after with Aster."

"Aster?" Spike said after finding his voice.

Estelle looked up a him, petulant. "Our son. Or Vega if we have a girl."

Spike again was silent, an unreadable expression on his face. Estelle finally noticing, got an angry look in her eyes.

"What's the problem?" she asked, wringing her hands.

Spike looked over at her, "I just don't know...Estelle, I don't think I'm ready for this..." He looked down at his hands. How could he be a father? These hands that killed, how could they one day hold a child? And marriage... married to Estelle, whom he knew in the pit of his soul he did not truly love. Grasping for straws, Spike opened his mouth.

"We can't leave here, Estelle. You know that."

She looked him in eye, steel glinting in her own. "The Red Dragons? You think they can hold US back?"

Spike shook his head, bringing one of his hands to his forehead, "Yes, I do. You cannot imagine the power that the Red Dragons holds over us. We are nothing to them, we wouldn't stand a chance. They could find us across the galaxy."

Estelle looked down, knowing that Spike was speaking the truth. Spike continued.

"And besides that, I don't want to leave. You don't understand, I have real friends here, a home, a family. It's something I've never really had before."

Images of Vicious flashed through his mind. Them smiling together, having fun together....killing together. And of course there was always Julia.

Estelle stomped her foot, about to throw a temper tantrum. "You know, I thought you were the one, Spike. I thought that this baby would be the one."

Spike thought about her other son, already three, ignorant of his mother's existence.

Estelle's eyes began to fill with tears. "But I can see now...that I was wrong...Your stupid Red Dragons mean more to you than I do!"

Spike looked down at his feet and was silent. They had started to attract attention of some of the shoppers.

Estelle smiled a bit, a melancholy smile. "If you change your mind, you know where to find me..."

She walked off, carrying her bags of clothing that she had just bought, and Spike just watched her go.

The shoppers that had been paying somewhat attention to their conversation went back to their own, and Spike walked out of the mall like a ghost.

Estelle was pregnant, and he just let her go.



The city was grey. Clouds hung overhead, and wind tossed the trees's branches. Spike stood before the old catholic church, unmoving. The place where he had stayed before Estelle. Memories from his childhood flooded his mind, memories of Jack.

As Spike walked inside, a figure emerged from the shadows.

"Hello Vicious."

For some reason, Spike had a feeling of foreboding.

There was no expression on Vicious's face except for perhaps regret.

Vicious's voice came in an almost whisper, "There is an assignment for tonight. I want you to get the group together and meet with the White Tigers. Since they have recently experienced a change in leadership, negotiations need to made."

Spike mind went blank for a second. The White Tigers? Oh...the Black Tigers, that's right. There was a coup a week or two ago, Lorenzo Something or other was now leading it, and he had changed the name to show that the ideals and structure of the syndicate would be different. Spike considered this for a moment. Or perhaps it was mere vanity.

Spike looked quizzically at Vicious. "Why am I meeting with the White Tigers? Aren't you coming?"

Vicious shook his head. "No, I have a special assignment for tonight." He briefly played with the chord connecting his katana to his waist. "Julia won't be there either. She is being reassigned to another team. So it will just be you, Estelle, Angel and Dusty tonight."

Spike raised an eyebrow. "Why is Julia being reassigned?"

Vicious shrugged. "Orders from above. Who are we to argue?"

Spike brought a cigarette out of his pocket and brought it to his lips. Something about this assignment made him feel uneasy.



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The meeting place was an empty warehouse, or at least it appeared so. But Spike knew that there would be many White Tiger members inside. Many more than Spike's feeble force.

He glanced back at his team. Dusty and Angel actually seemed to be serious for once, perhaps sensing Spike's discomfort. Estelle refused to even look in his direction.

When they got to the meeting place, Spike's bad feeling had gotten worse. It could almost be a premonition by now, except he had never really believed in those types of things. But even so...something about the whole situation just didn't add up. Vicious and Julia both gone on the same night, just four people to negotiate with the White Tigers? It didn't make any sense. Why didn't they send someone higher up, like Mao? And considering Spike's own past experiences with the Black Tigers....

It just wasn't logical.

Even so, Spike knew he had an assignment, and if he didn't complete it, he and his team might as well be dead anyway. The Red Dragons didn't tolerate insubordination very well.

Spike thought to himself, 'Whatever happens, happens,' and boldly walked in through the front door, team in tow. Once he got inside, and saw the truly empty warehouse, Spike knew he had been set up.

With a loud crash, all the windows in the warehouse were broken as bullets hit and whizzed through them.

"Holy Shit!" yelled Dusty as a bullet nearly hit grazed his arm.

They were surrounded.

Operating mostly on instinct by now, Spike yelled frantic instructions to Angel, Dusty and Estelle.

"Get out! Now!" he yelled.

The four of them ran in different directions, nearly completely in a panic. Spike was running behind Angel, Estelle went with Dusty. They were out of the warehouse when a bullet whizzed by Spike's head, and he watched in shock as it tore through Angel's chest, a splatter of blood hitting the floor. Angel fell, a hole through his heart. At the same time a bullet hit Spike in the arm, and one hit him in the leg.

Spike knelt by his side and grabbed Angel's arm, pulling him behind a parked car for cover.

"Angel?"

Angel opened his eyes. Blood sputtered through his mouth, it must have gotten into his lungs. Angel's eyes stared upward, unseeing.

"Tell Dusty I love him."

Spike watched as Angel's eyes glazed over and his chest stopped moving. He wanted to say something, but no words came.

He pulled himself up, weakened from blood loss himself. But it was nothing compared to what happened to Angel. Spike began wandering along the streets surrounding the warehouse. His only thought to get away, and find out what had happened with Estelle and Dusty.

As he stumbled along, his vision started to fade in and out. He moved along the walls, using them for support, falling now and then, but managing to pull himself up.

After a while Spike realized that he recognized the neighborhood that he was in. It was Julia's neighborhood. And he was heading straight toward her apartment around the corner.

He had almost reached her door when he collapsed, his face hitting against the asphalt.



He woke up to humming.

She sat in a corner of the room reading, waiting for him to wake up. When she noticed that he was awake she came to his bedside, inquiring look in her eyes.

The song she had been humming was something his mother used to sing, Spike thought distantly.

"Just like that, sing for me."

She smiled. He did too, as he fell asleep again.



When Spike woke up again, it was not Julia, but Dusty, who stayed by his bedside.

Spike looked up at Dusty, who had obviously been crying.

Spike was a little disconcerted for a few seconds until he remembered. "Where's Estelle."

Dusty's eyes became hard. Spike remembered then that Angel was dead.

"She's dead...She...she got shot in the head."

Spike's eyes became blank.

He looked up at Dusty once more before falling back to sleep.

"He said to tell you he loves you."

Dusty's sobs even penetrated Spike's dreams.

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Oh, by the way. If you liked this story, go check out Blessings of a Beast (affectionately called BOB) by ScarletStarlet. It's a sister story to this one told from Vicious's point of view. Enjoy!