Disclaimer: I disclaim.

A.N.: This is kind of a P.O.V. chapter. Juicy stuff coming up in the next chapter though...

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~ ~ ~After Sookie left, all Luke could do was wait. He hated being helpless. He hated being alone with his thoughts. They always came back to the same person. A person that could have quite possibly just left his life for good. He really was an asshole. But deep down he knew he was right. He couldn't let her hurt him. He had to keep those familiar old walls up. He hadn't admitted his feelings to her, not really. He hadn't admitted them to Sookie. Well, not on purpose. He had barely admitted them to himself. He couldn't get his hopes up. High expectations lead to big let downs. He knew that. He had experience in that field. His father had had high expectations of him, and he'd been let down. Luke had gotten his hopes up when Rachel had come home, but he once again came up short of what he'd expected. Getting high hopes was definitely not on Luke's to do list. ~ ~ ~

* * *Back at home, Lorelai was berating herself for ever saying anything to Luke. She was so insulted by what he had said. She had missed him so much over the summer, and she had been so sure that everything would be ok. She was sure that he couldn't hate her forever, but it didn't seem that way anymore. How could he think that she would simply drop him once she got bored? How could he think she would get bored? She had been coming into his diner for the past five years. He had to have known it wasn't just for the coffee, as good as it was. But, oh god, did he? Did he know that he wasn't just a meal ticket to her? She had made it very clear that it was the food and not the company bringing her back again and again. But she had also made it clear that he was important to her. She remembered saying something to that effect to him, right after the whole "Lorelai is dating a twelve- year-old" debacle. She had to figure out what she was feeling. That was what Luke had told her to do, and darn it, she was gonna prove him wrong. She didn't want to get rid of him. She wanted him near her. All the time. Right now, in fact. She... she was pretty sure that she... loved him. As odd as it sounded, Lorelai found herself realising that it was true. She loved Luke. * * *

~ ~ ~Luke paced around the diner, doing random things to keep his mind off her. It wasn't working. He remembered something he'd heard somewhere... admittance is the first form of acceptance, or the first step toward recovery, or something. Something about a twelve step program. Maybe if he admitted the one thing he'd rather die than admit, he could finally get on with his life. Maybe he'd forget about all the crap he'd been through; watching her date man after man and drink coffee after coffee. If he could just bring himself to say it. Even think it. He knew he was in love with her, it was just the saying out loud part that made him uncomfortable. It always sounded so forced. If there was another way to say it, it might be easier. Like if he could just say 'Hows about them Yankees?' and it would all be ok. She'd know, he wouldn't be uneasy. But there was only one way. 'I love you, Lorelai'. Simple, but he couldn't bring himself to say it. 'I love you'. Damn. Why did it have to be so hard? This wasn't helping at all. Every second he was away from her he loved her more. No matter what, he always would. And it killed him. He wanted her to come back to him and say everything he'd been waiting to hear. *Shit.* He thought *My damn hopes are up.*~ ~ ~

* * *But what if Luke didn't love her? He could laugh at her and say 'YOU? And ME? HA!' But wait. What had he said at the diner? He couldn't handle it if she just used him up and spit him out? It would hurt too much? That had to have meant something, right? Right! He didn't want to be another Max! He didn't want her to hurt him. And in order for him to be hurt by her, he had to love her, right? He wanted this to be real. He wanted this to last. Luke was a commitment kind of guy. The reason he hadn't been with anyone since Rachel was because he didn't believe in casual dating, sex, anything. If he did something, he wanted it to be real. And he wanted it to be with her. Lorelai Sighed. What she really needed right now was Rory.

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AN: Ok, not my best chapter, but what can I say? I've been distracted lately. :) More to come very soon!