Disclaimer: I do not own Sailor Moon, nor the quotes.


I'll put a girdle round about the earth
In forty minutes!
- Puck, A Midsummer Night's Dream

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Saffire bowed his head, thinking dryly that the only progress he had made was to discover he thoroughly disliked humans.
I have a full report at your disposal, Sire.
Demando regarded his brother impatiently.
He demanded.
Are there no more pamphlets...? He tasted the word carefully, still not used to it's feel on his tongue.
It appears that sex and courting are two different enterprises entirely, my King. Saffire explained, his tone clear and crisp. It had taken quite some time to decipher the courting rituals of humans from that of other less irrational creatures.
From what I can gather, there are two distinct types of human relationships,
Demando leaned forwards with interest.
One: Paternal. Two: Sexual.
What of siblings? Demando asked curiously.
Siblings are treated with the same affection and consideration which you bestow upon me, Sire. Saffire said wryly. Demando leaned back in his chair, placing his elbows on the hard, stone armrests.
You are not satisfied with your current status, brother? Saffire fought the urge to scream: What do you think!? when he looked up at his King questioningly. He had not called him in what seemed like ages. It was unsettling.
With all due respect Sire, I feel that I am... he searched for the words, Unqualified to be this missions human relations officer. He finished. Demando looked amused.
I was under the impression you thrived on research.
Saffire was quick to reply.
Indeed I am Sire! But In my limited research of the courting rituals of humans, I have observed that to acquire a firm and untainted understanding, your Majesty will have to discover it for himself.
Demando considered this. Leave the royal court? Mingle with uncivilized humans?
Saffire watched his brother deliberate, pushing the hope he felt back down into his chest. Then, an idea struck him. A devious smile crept along Saffire's mouth. Hiding it quickly, Saffire bowed his head and said If I may, Sire. I had learned that when it comes to the fair sex, humans find the direct approach most becoming in their mates.
Demando's look of confliction cleared, and was replaced with understanding- a predatorily smile touching his normally impassive features.
He said, the smile reaching his eyes.
As Saffire was dismissed, a thought crossed his mind and refused to settle.
What exactly was his brother planning?

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Usagi looked through rack after rack of dresses. Usually, the mall made her feel safe, and secure. The crowds, the smells of fast food, the music that blared out over the waves of people, who where too absorbed with bargains to notice. Drawing her attention back to the rack of brightly colored dressed, Minako held one up before Usagi triumphantly.
Try it on! She beamed, shoving it into the crook of Usagi's arm. Usagi was about to protest when the clerk spoke from behind them.
Can I help you? She said politely, nodding to the two girls.
Yes! My friend would like to try this dress on! Minako chirped, pushing Usagi in the direction on the change rooms.
Usagi said desperately, smiling at the clerk who took the dress from her and led the way.
I'll be back, okay? Mina explained, as Usagi entered the small room doubtfully.
It's way too expensive! Usagi argued, eyeing the red dress. It was attractive, but extremely outlandish.
I'll be back to critique! Mina said, turning on her heel and leaving Usagi with the clerk, who looked at her expectantly.
If you need any help, just let me know. She said soothingly, then left Usagi with the task of figuring out just how to get into the red tangle of straps and holes. Usagi untangled it from the hanger.
Now, where's the zipper on this thing...?