Wow, I'm really on a roll with these things, aren't I? I'll just let you read in peace.

1 PART THREE

Having a very bad feeling, Zim folded up the map/letter and put it away in his pod. He ran over to one of the ventilator tubes sticking out of the ship and called into it, trying to contact his men. "Hello crew! All men report on deck. We have a code red situation. This is not a drill. Be on the lookout for assassins disguised as customs officials! Hello? Can anybody hear me? Hmm. They know I don't like it when they ignore me. Something's wrong." He walked back up to the bridge and went inside. What he found was not what he had hoped for. "Oh no…" The entire bridge crew had been sprouted. He saw the ensign who had informed him of the customs officials lying near the ladder to the deck below, now reduced to a pile of begonias. "Ensign Arnold was just a kid. I'm sorry I led you into trouble, sailor." Walking past the dead toon, Zim climbed down the ladder to the deck below.

His heart dropped as he saw even more sprouted crewmen. As he walked towards the corpse of Deck Officer Glenn, he did not notice the shadows down the corridor. He suddenly heard voices down the corridor, the shadows manifesting into men with guns. "Hey! He's over here!" yelled one.

"Let's sprout him!" yelled another. A third merely cocked his gun. As all three armed men started down the corridor, Zim was at a loss. He had no time to run and nowhere to run to. Suddenly, as door behind him opened and somebody grabbed him and pulled him inside, slamming and locking shut the door. The rescuer was, of course, Gir, who had pulled Zim into the engine room. Befitting his new job as a sailor, Gir had a cute little sailor outfit painted on his body. It went well with his eyes. One of the assassins knocked on the door. "Customs officials, open up!"

"Yeah, we, uh, wanna check your bags!"

"Don't worry Master, they can't get in here!" said Gir confidently.

Another assassin spoke up. "Let's just set the explosives and get out of here."

Zim blinked. Explosives? "Yay, we're doomed!" cheered Gir.

"Gir, if the bombs go off the engine will be destroyed too."

Gir stopped cheering. He had put a lot of work into the engine. "Oh…" He started looking very anxious.

"Okay Gir, just calm down. It's kind of hard to panic when you're wearing that cute little sailor outfit."

"NO IT'S NOT!" Gir wailed.

"Okay, okay, just don't panic. Gir, do something!"

"Okay. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

"Something productive."

"Oh. Uh…" Gir sat down on the floor. That meant it was up to Zim to do something. He surveyed the engine room. If they opened the door, the bomb would probably go off. The portholes were small enough for them to slip through, but Zim didn't want to take his chances with the water, even if he was using a waterproof force field. Zim took a look at the engine. Gir had really done a number on the old diesel. It was incredibly powerful. In fact, with both anchors down and securing the ship, it was possible that if they put the engines in full reverse they could tear the ship in half and sail until they ran out of fuel. Zim suggested this possibility to Gir. The robot shook his head. "Nuh-uh. It won't work. I tried, oh I tried, but it's just not powerful enough."

"Is there any way you can make it powerful enough?"

"Not without blowing the thing up. Master, I was able to make the Doom Wagon super fast because I just had to improve on an antimatter reactor. What we have here is a modified diesel. It'll never work, and I just don't have the tools or time to make it work."

"Well, is there anyway we could tear the ship in half with our current engine?"

Gir pondered that. "I still don't think so. Not unless the hull itself was weakened."

Zim paced around the room, thinking. They had four controls in here, the starboard and port engine controls, the port anchor control, and the starboard anchor control. Zim's intuition kicked in, helping him to formulate a plan using nothing but the engines and the anchors to save them. Well, there would be a little help from his pod, but…He walked over to the engine controls and used the starboard engine to turn the ship left. This tightened the starboard anchor chain and slackened the port anchor chain. Zim then raised the starboard anchor and lowered it again, dropping it right on the port anchor, causing the two to interlock. He crossed the engine room and raised the port anchor, causing the two anchors to form a loop, the interlocking part of which was right outside the portside porthole. Extending his spider legs to look through the porthole, Zim reached out with one of his legs, grabbing around the anchors. He pulled them towards himself, causing the hook part of the starboard anchor to come through the porthole, grabbing onto the wall. He crossed the room once more and raised the starboard anchor. "Gir, cover your ears!"

"Why?" A horrendous ear-splitting noise occurred as the anchor loop was dragged through the hull of the ship, causing a huge gash that cut through the bottom half of the ship. "What was that?"

"The dotted line, buddy. Now come on, we'd better secure ourselves."

"Why?"

"Because we're busting out of here!"

Gir and Zim both grabbed onto a part of the engine. Zim extended two of his spider legs and pulled the starboard and port engine controls down at the same time, putting them in reverse. Thanks to the gash he had made, the ship was ripped in half, causing their half to scoot across the ocean while the other half sunk along with the assassins and the explosives. Using the engine controls, Zim and Gir followed Patrick's map as best they could until they ran out of gas. As the ship started to sink, Zim quickly activated his force field, covering his body in a millimeter thick shimmer and his air bubble, encasing his head in a, well, a bubble. Gir needed nothing, since he's just a robot. As the ship sank, they held on tightly to the railing on the back, not wanting to get lost. And no, the changing water pressure was not a problem. Since water or air pressure is almost never a problem in cartoons, it did not factor into the laws of physics governing Nickworld. After a long drop, the ship finally hit bottom. A single electric lantern was still working on the ship, shining its light onto a patch of ground on the very bottom of the ocean. Reluctantly, Gir and Zim let go of the rail and swam down to the pool of light. Once they had touched bottom, Gir started dancing around, clutching his throat. "Hggk! Nnggh! Master! Can't…breathe!"

"Gir, you're a robot. You don't have lungs."

"Oh yeah. Doo de doo de doo de doo…"

Zim looked up at what was left of the Laura sadly. "Laura…looks like I let you down again."

"I told you that name was bad luck."

"Gir!"

"Sorry. Hey Master, aren't Irkens afraid of water because it hurts and even kills them?"

"Yes, what's your point?"

"We're at the bottom of the Sea of Orange, the biggest body of water in the whole of Nickworld. Shouldn't you be worried?"

Zim laughed. "Of course I'm not worried, Gir."

"How come?"

"Just because I am in the middle of an entire ocean of a substance that can almost immediately kill me after causing excruciating pain to every part of my body, protected only by a millimeter-thin force field and bubble of air that could at any moment fail from a number of possible malfunctions and leaving me to die a horrible death doesn't…mean…I should…be…afraid…" He glared at Gir, while shivering at the same time. "Great job, Gir. Now I'm scared silly."

"Yay! I did a good job!"

"I was being sarcastic, Gir."

"Oh. Yay!"

"That's a bad thing."

"Oh. Yay!"

"Forget it. I'll just try to think of something else." He thought about the Pearl, where he could continue the search for Rana. "Okay Gir, according to Patrick's map, we should only be a few miles from the Pearl. And by my calculations, it should be right over…there!" He said, pointing towards a point of blue light off in the distance. "Come on, let's go."

Zim was about to take a step out of the pool of light and into the unfathomable darkness of the sea when Gir stopped him. "Wait, brave captain! Here at the bottom of the Sea of Orange dwell the most fearsome and dangerous monsters of all. The horrendous demons of the deep are waiting to devour you whole the instant you leave this pool of light. Heed my words, or take one step forward and find out for yourself." He said in a creepy voice.

"Okay, okay! I won't take another step! Just stop it with that creepy voice."

"All right. Look! There's one of the monsters now!" said Gir, pointing towards a light that was approaching them. The light grew brighter and brighter until they could see the source of the light! It was horrible, it was terrible, it was…a fish in a diving suit? The fish appeared to be an old grouper, with a metal diving suit and a lantern attached to his head by a flexible cord. He looked like he had red tendrils coming out of the tops of his eyes. "Okay, so it's not a sea monster but it is pretty creepy."

The grouper noticed them and came closer. "Ah no, another shipwreck? Jeez, what is with you people?"

"Uh, hi, we've had a shipwreck. Do you think you could help us out?" asked Zim.

"Help how?"

"Well, what's your name?"

"Chepito. I'm down here walking to the employment office."

"Walking?"

"Yeah, this suit here allows me to walk along the bottom of the ocean."

"You're a fish. Why don't you just swim?"

"Hey, have you ever heard of a cartoon fish swimming across the Sea of Orange?"

"Good point. Why didn't you take a boat?"

"I got tired of one waiting to come into port so I got this suit so I could walk along the sea bottom to get to the other side. I've been down here for about a year now."

"Don't you think you would have reached the other side by now?"

"It's a big ocean, boy, what do you know about it?"

Zim frowned. "Why are you calling me a boy?"

"Well, ain't ya?"

"No, I'm an adult!"

Chepito blinked. "You are? But you're so small…"

"I'm an Irken. Most of us don't grow much and stay small for most of our lives."

"Oh. Weird."

"Well, I am technically an alien. Do you think you could send for help?"

"Sure son, I'll call for help at the next phone booth I see!" He started laughing.

"Right, good point. Aren't you afraid of the sea monsters?"

"Nah, they're all scared of my little light here."

"Aren't you worried it'll burn out?"

"No, I found this really cool coral down here that glows all the time, day or night. The glow never wears out, so I'll stay safe."

"Why are your eyebrows all wiggly?" asked Gir.

"Oh, these aren't my eyebrows. Them's barnacles. I don't move fast enough to shake em', so they tend to pile up. I don't mind though, they're the only company I get. Ain't that right fellas?" The tentacles waved a little.

"Do you think you could take us to the Pearl?" asked Zim.

Chepito started snickering. "Oh no, don't tell me you believe that somewhere in this ocean is a giant pearl that's so big and beautiful and bright that you can see it from the surface of the ocean, and people on passing ships are so attracted to it that they throw themselves off passing ships and are never seen again?"

"Yeah, in fact I think it's right over there." Said Zim, pointing to the point of light.

Chepito turned around to look. He started laughing again. "Ha ha! You poor fool! That's the moon! Don't tell me you came down here to dive for the moon!"

"The moon?" asked Zim, confused.

"Yeah, I've been using it as a navigational aid for months. All you gotta do is keep the moon on your right and you'll stay in a straight line. Oldest trick in the book."

"But-"

"Now if you'll excuse me, I've got a lot of walking to do."

Zim realized this fish was mistaken and had probably been walking in circles for months because the Pearl was fixed in one spot. He knew they needed light to get to the Pearl, and Chepito was the only source available. While he quickly plotted a way to get Chepito to help them, Zim said, "Watch out for sea monsters."

"Who, these guys? Ah, they don't bother old Chepito, see?" Chepito said, turning towards the darkness and pointing his lantern at a spot away from them. The light immediately revealed several dozen giant and terrifying sea monsters, all of which had huge mouths full of razor sharp teeth and gaudily-colored hides. Chepito pulled the lantern back down. "They don't get anywhere near me with this light. Well, toodles!"

Chepito started to turn away. Zim knew now was his chance. "Gir, attack!"

"Why?"

"That glowing light is a taco!"

"TACO!" Gir leapt at Chepito, knocking him over and scrambling to grab hold of the lantern, which he started gnawing on.

"Ahhh! Get him off, get him off!" wailed Chepito.

"I will if you follow where we're going."

"Anything, anything, just call him off!"

"Gir, come!" A little reluctantly, Gir got off Chepito. Zim started walking into Chepito's little pool of light. "Let's move it, we're leaving."

"Where are going?" asked Chepito.

"The moon."

After maybe half an hour of walking, using Chepito to light the way, they climbed up a hill and found themselves safe in a huge pool of light, all generated by a glowing blue sphere perched atop a shaky rock pillar, which was sitting on an overhang of rock. The hill they were standing on sloped down into a bowl beneath the rock overhang, and sitting just outside the shadow cast by the overhang was what appeared to be a submarine! This appeared to be their ticket out of here, though what Zim wondered was why their was a submarine down here. The submarine was long but had a narrow volume. It had a large hatch in the middle that seemed to be made of some strong crystal or stained glass. The front of the submarine had a curving fin jutting out of it with two clear glass spheres protruding from the sides, neither of which looked like they served any purpose. Zim wasn't sure, but he thought he could see something in the shadows beneath the overhang. Chepito had only one thing on his mind, though. "The Pearl! I knew I'd find her someday!"

"I thought you said you didn't believe in the Pearl."

"Shut your yap, boy."

"I told you, I'm not a boy, I'm a-"

"Master, what's going on?" asked Gir.

"Chepito and I are having an argument."

"No, I mean what's going on up there?" asked Gir, pointing to about five figures sinking from the surface, coming near the area beneath the overhang. They appeared to be toons who had jumped ship, trying to get the Pearl. They had diving gear on, so were able to breathe. As they neared the pearl, something suddenly lurched out of the shadows of the overhang. It was a giant octopus! And when I say giant, I mean giant. Lashing out with its tentacles, it grabbed the divers, opened the big hatch on the back of the submarine, and stuffed them inside before returning to the shadows, its eyes and some of its tentacles visible. The octopus was watching them. "What was that?" asked Gir, his voice hushed.

"I have no idea." Said Zim. He frowned at the sea beast. He doubted the octopus' eyesight was that good, so how could it see them? Then Zim looked over at Chepito. Of course! The octopus saw Chepito's light and was merely waiting for him to get within range so it could capture him. Zim knew they would have to use Chepito as bait to hitch a ride on the submarine, because Zim had a feeling that whatever happened to Rana is probably whatever is going to happen to the people the octopus trapped in the submarine. He knew she probably wasn't dead, because she was smart enough to use the force field he had. After all, all Irken pods had it. But he also knew that Dib might have something to do with this, because he was on her ship when she supposedly jumped overboard. At the moment, Zim didn't really care about whom was behind this, he just had a feeling that if he got a ride on the sub, they would find Rana. But first they had to get rid of Chepito. "Chepito, could you go off for a little while? Your light is attracting the octopus."

"Hell no! I don't want you stealing my Pearl."

"Whatever. Come on, let's see if we can find a way down."

They started walking along the edge of the hill, sticking within the pool of light. The octopus kept tracking them. After a bit of a walk, they reached an old, greasy barnacle-covered rock. All of the barnacles were reaching out, trying to grab things with their tendrils. Remembering what Chepito had said about being too slow to escape the barnacles, Zim walked briskly by the rock, moving too quickly for the barnacles latched on. Chepito followed him and the tentacles and the tentacles of his own barnacles intertwined. Chepito protested, trying to break free. "Hey, leggo of me!" While he struggled, Zim and Gir quickly ran away from Chepito. The octopus slithered from its hiding place, reaching out to the mariner with a huge tentacle. "Hey, where are you guys going?" Chepito yelled after Zim and Gir, who were now sliding down the slope and running for the submarine. "Don't leave me here! What the-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!" Chepito suddenly saw the octopus. The octopus wrapped a tentacle around him and pulled, causing the barnacles above his eyes to be ripped off. The octopus carried the screaming Chepito back to the submarine, where it stuffed him down the hatch, then went inside as well. Its boneless body changing shape to match the contours of the submarine, the octopus pushed its head into the fin at the prow, its eyes bulging into the crystal spheres. Its tentacles grabbed onto a twisted iron bar and started turning it, pedaling the propellers into motion.

Zim and Gir climbed onto the back of the submarine just as it took off, heading for unknown parts. "Where are we heading?" Zim shouted over the whir of the propellers.

"South, I think!" yelled Gir.

"South? But there's nothing down there, is there?"

"I don't know, all I know is that's where we're going."

"Then I guess there is something down there, isn't there?"

Somewhere in the deep south, in the middle of the Sea of Orange (Yes, I know it's an ocean, but Sea of Orange sounds better than Ocean of Orange doesn't it?) is a huge pit, the size of Australia. This pit is so huge and so deep that the ocean water itself goes over the edge of the pit, a giant round waterfall. The edge rises to form a ring plateau from the ocean floor, only a few thousand feet from the surface of the ocean. This is how it is possible for the pit to be a waterfall as well. The pit goes incredibly far into the crust of Nickworld, and it is so deep that nobody knows what is at the bottom. If it weren't for the fact that bottomless pits can't exist, some people would say it is one. Jutting up from the edge of the waterfall is an island, a very bleak, barren, and desolate island, one covered by a sprawling factory. In fact, the island actually juts out a little from the edge, looking over the abyss. The half of the island looking over the abyss is mostly taken up by a great hemispherical track for some huge thing that goes on a track. A big fancy dock was made for the submarine at the central part of this factory, but Zim and Gir weren't going there. They jumped off the submarine at the base of the island, at the part where current wasn't a problem. Right in front of them was a small metal door placed in the rock face of the island. To their left was a path that led to some coral reefs, and to their right was a path that led all around the base of the island to a conveyor belt of some sort, very close to the edge. Opting for neither option, Zim started for the metal doors. As he approached them, they opened automatically, revealing a propeller- powered elevator. As he began to get in it, Gir started over. "Wait for me!"

"No Gir, wait here. I need to see what's inside by myself. You should be fine by yourself, you're a big android."

"But what happens if the octopus comes back?"

"Poke it in the eye and steal his sub."

"Heh, stupid octopus."

Zim walked into the elevator, the door shutting behind him. Lights around the cylinder flashed as water was drained from it, replaced by air. Zim checked the options on the buttons he could press. They were unlabeled, unfortunately. There was a strange slot next to the buttons. He pressed one, and a display with the words, "Keycard required" came up. He tried another one, with the same result. Angrily, he started pushing every button on the panel, not getting anywhere, until he pushed the very top button. The elevator shot up the shaft, going to the top of the factory, so to speak. After a swift passage, the elevator stopped. Zim got out and found himself in a dimly-lit and foreboding place. He was standing on a catwalk overlooking a floor that he could not see. The catwalk went a little straight, then split into two forks. One led right to a door on the wall. Curious, Zim took the left path and tried the door. It was locked. He looked down the right fork and saw it led to a marble floor in a corridor going into the walls. One of the walls of that corridor looked weird, different from all the others. But Zim was a little preoccupied looking at the place in entirety to take a closer look at the wall in that corridor, he was still on the catwalk. He didn't like this place. It looked like some sort of factory, (which it was, and you would know that if you've been reading carefully) but there was something…wrong with where he was. There was something ominous and depressing about the place, as if hundreds of lost cartoons, deprived of their rightful birthright and forced into hellish labor, had moaned their despair to uncaring walls.

Or maybe it was the scrollwork on the railings. Art Deco Aquatic was a bit much. With no other way to go, Zim took the right-hand path, going down the corridor and past the weird wall, finding himself in a small office of some sort, more like a reception room really. There was a desk, a wastebasket, lots of paperwork, and a cabinet full of books. The desk was pretty low, suited for someone of his species. There was a door at the other end of the room. As he approached the door, Zim's senses went nuts. He didn't know how, but he knew who was going to be in the next room. Sucking up his courage, Zim walked through the door. He found himself in a huge, impressive office, quite bare. It had a vaulted ceiling and several windows, including one huge opening in the wall that went from floor to ceiling. A desk sat near the back of the room, with a little lamp on it. It was built for the same kind of person as the other desk, but a little larger. Standing behind the desk, looking out the window was…"Rana?" asked Zim, walking forward.

Rana turned around, surprised. "Zim? What are you doing here?"

He came up to her. "I wanted to see how your trip was going. By the way, thanks for that laser blast you sent me, it really hit the spot."

She looked down. "You were heading for a trap, I was trying to warn you. Dib was using me like bait. I didn't want you ending up a prisoner here like me."

For some reason, Zim didn't feel like this justified everything. "Prisoner? Where's your cell? Or are you just sharing a bunk with the warden?" He was surprised at himself. Why had he said those things? Was he worried that because she was walking around freely, she was…with Dib? He snapped out of it when Rana angrily slapped him.

She walked away from him. "If that's what you think of me…then why did you come here?"

"Because this is where he belongs." Said a familiar voice from the door. Rana and Zim looked towards the door as a bigheaded boy with a trench coat walked through it. Dib. "Here. Working for me." He said, walking past a confused Rana and next to an equally confused Zim. "I knew you'd come around eventually. Right or wrong, Invader Zim is always with the winning team, isn't that right, Zim? That's why you're here now."

Zim was puzzled. What was Dib talking about? "I'm getting off this rock, and I'm taking Rana and anyone else here with me."

Dib grinned. "Hahahahahahahaha! Zim, there's no was off this island. And you can't call for help with that little communicator of yours. I'm afraid you're stuck here in my little executive training program. You see, I need you to take my place here, Zim. I've got to get back to the city where the action is."

They were interrupted as Gir walked in, dripping water all over the metal floor. "Sorry Master, I had to come in. I think I was starting to rust."

"Him I don't need." Said Dib, pressing a button underneath his desk.

A trapdoor opened immediately beneath Gir's feet. "Wha-" Before he could say anything else, the android fell down the trapdoor, which closed behind him.

"I suggest you look out the main window." Said Dib, pointing towards the big slot.

Zim ran over and looked out just in time to see a tiny gray and blue speck fall into the water and get swept over the edge, falling into the abyss. Zim looked at the pit in horror. Furious, he turned to Dib. "I'm going to grind you into powder for that, you bastard!" he snarled.

"Maybe later…but for now, let me just show you to your new office!" said Dib, landing a punch on Zim's jaw that knocked him out cold.

Zim woke up a half-hour later in the room that had been locked earlier. It was a small office, with no real decorations or anything at all. He sat behind an ugly desk. Near the door was a big cage that contained two little birds sitting on benches, chipping away at pieces of green, glowing coral with tiny hammers. As he shifted his jaw, checking to see if it was broken, one of the birds said, "Uh oh Bibi, the mean new boss is up."

Zim shook his head and got out from behind the desk, noticing the cage. He was surprised. What were these children doing in a cage? He walked over to them. "Hello, children."

They looked up from their benches. The boy said, I'll peck you, I swear to God!"

The other one, a girl, said, "Pugsy, please don't peck anyone else, that's why they put us in here in the first place."

"Why do you want to bite me?" asked Zim.

"You're the mean new boss. Mr. Membrane said you were meaner than he was." Said Pugsy.

"Mr. Membrane said you had a bone saw!" added Bibi.

Zim frowned. Obviously his foe had lied to these poor kids. "I'm Zim. What's your name?"

"Zim?" the children asked in unison.

"Mr. Membrane told us about you! You're the one that tricked Rana!" said Pugsy.

"Poor Rana…" said Bibi sadly.

"Hey, I didn't trick anyone." Said Zim, offended.

"Mr. Membrane said he was supposed to take care of Rana, but you stole her case from him." Said Pugsy.

"Is that true?" asked Bibi.

Zim wasn't sure how to answer. Technically, they were right. He had stolen Rana's case from Dib, but…he decided to turn away from that painful chain of thought. "Look, Rana and I are friends. You can ask her."

"She talked about you before." Said Pugsy.

"Whenever she says your name, she looks so sad." Said Bibi.

"I don't know what you did to her, but you're gonna be sorry!" Pugsy growled.

I already am, he thought. "What are you doing in there?"

"Making light bulbs." Said Bibi.

"Look, we're working as fast as we can. If you want any more, do it yourself." Said Pugsy.

"Relax children, I'm here to help."

"We really don't have any more room in this cage." Said Bibi.

"Besides, your hands are too big to make light bulbs." Added Pugsy.

Even though he knew he shouldn't bother, he protested, "My claws are not too big!"

"Then why don't you help?" asked Pugsy.

"Uh…I just don't have any of those tiny, tiny tools."

"Here you can have mine." Said Pugsy, throwing his hammer at Zim's head, hitting it and falling onto the floor. The two birds started snickering.

Zim couldn't help it. He lost his temper. "You two are very bad children. I'm glad you're in that cage." They started laughing. "VERY bad." Not taking him seriously, they kept laughing. He sighed and picked up the little hammer, putting it in his pod. Who knows? It might come in handy. "I meant I'm here to help you get out of that cage."

They stopped laughing. "You can't do that!" said Pugsy fiercely. "We have to stay here and protect Rana!"

"She'd be so sad and alone without us." Said Bibi. "We hear her crying sometimes."

"Well, I'm here to take Rana away from here."

This seemed to be an even worse thing to say. "But you can't do that!" said Pugsy, shocked. "Then who would take care of us?"

"We'd be all alone!" wailed Bibi.

Dropping their tools, they started crying. Zim started worrying. "Please, stop crying. Please. Come on. Just…stop crying, okay? Okay? Urk, why am I so bad with children?" He tried to take their minds off what he had just said. "Uh, nice cage you have there."

They stopped crying, now looking scared. "Mr. Membrane told us he bred demon ravens in here, with Irken heads." Whispered Pugsy, as if worried that the aforementioned ravens would hear him.

"He told us if we ever got away, he would send the ravens after us…" started Bibi.

"…And make nests out of our bones." Finished Pugsy.

Zim was distraught. "Dib actually told you that?" They nodded. "And you think I'M worse than him? Have I even actually done anything bad to you kids?"

"If you're not such a bad guy, prove it." Said Pugsy.

"Okay." Said Zim. Walking over to the side of the cage, he opened the door to it. "Fly! Be free! Go peck Dib's big head!"

"We can't leave, we're scared of the ravens." Said Bibi.

"And we're worried Mr. Membrane will do something bad to Rana if we're not here." Said Pugsy.

"I promise I'll protect you from the ravens. And I'm taking Rana with us. We're all getting out of here."

"We won't come out until you can prove that." Said Pugsy.

Zim shrugged. "Okay. In the meantime, I'll just leave the door open so you can escape if you change your mind. Here, let me prop it up for you." Walking back to the desk, he broke off a leg of his chair and used it to keep the cage door open. "There. I'm going to go find Rana now. You two be brave little soldiers, okay?"

"Okay." They both said.

Zim left the office. As he did, the full weight of what had happened half an hour ago hit him. He stumbled, shocked. Gir was dead. His best friend, his loyal servant, gone forever. He clenched his fist in anger. There was no time for tears later. First he had to find out what was going on here. Then he had to rescue Rana, those poor little birds, and anyone else on this godforsaken island. After he had done that and had his revenge on Dib, then there would be time for tears. Then he would cry. He walked into the office that belonged to Rana. The beautiful Irken was now sitting at her desk glumly, doing paperwork. She looked up as he came in, a look of anger and hurt on her face. "Oh look, it's my Prince Charming! Are you here just to insult me some more, or do you just want some ice for your head?"

Zim saddened. She really didn't like him at the moment, but probably because of what he had said and whatever Dib had told her. "I guess I have some explaining to do."

She snorted. "Don't waste your breath. Dib's already explained everything to me."

He frowned. "I guess you have some explaining to do."

"Wha-me? What did I do?"

"Why did you take me out with that laser blast?"

Her face went from angry to sad. To keep from looking in his eyes, she peered down at the paperwork. "I told you-to stop you from falling into Dib's trap. If you had made it on to that ship then you would have ended up…"

"Here?"

"Yes."

"Why do you work for Dib?"

"I only do what he asks to protect the children."

"Another thing, why are those birds in a cage?"

"With those wings, they're the only things on this island Dib can't control."

"Hey, if they can fly, let's set them free to go get help!"

"They can't fly that far, Zim. But they can fly circles around Dib, and can peck pretty hard." For a moment, she smiled, and the air around her seemed excited. But the moment passed, and she was sad again.

"Why did you run out of my office?"

She paused. "I felt so embarrassed, and you looked so disappointed in me, I couldn't stand it anymore."

"Then what did you do for the four months I was in Speedo Bottom?"

"I was lost."

"What did you-"

"I don't want to talk about what happened during those four months."

"Has Dib hurt you in any way?"

"Not as much as I've hurt him. Man, can that guy take a punch!"

"But really, has he hurt you?"

She hesitated again. "Zim, have you noticed that I'm missing something?"

Confused, Zim looked over her body (not like that, you perverts!) and suddenly noticed what she meant. Her utility pod was gone. "Where's your pod?"

"Didn't you see earlier? Dib has it. He took it after that octopus brought me here. Without the pod, I'm not totally defenseless, but I have no hope of leaving."

"That bastard…"

"That's the worst he's done to me. But there are other things…I don't want to talk about those things."

"He hasn't tried to rape you or anything, has he?"

"Well, he has tried to come on to me a few times…but I always 'convinced' him to leave me alone."

"Convinced him how?"

"How did I respond when you insulted me?"

"Ah. Okay, I'll lay off the questions."

"Good, Now if only we could get you to lay off the cologne."

"Hey, I'm a sailor now. We're required to wear this stuff." He had had enough background chat. "We're leaving. Come with me."

She shook her head in disgust. "Trying to steal me away from Dib again, I see. Zim, don't you ever give up?"

"I'm not trying to steal your commission, I just want to get you out of here."

"Then why don't you ask your boss for a day off?"

"I can't believe you think he's my boss. He's my archenemy!"

"I think he's your boss, you think he's my boyfriend. It doesn't look like we have a good foundation of trust, do we?"

He sighed. "I apologize for implying he was your boyfriend. I do trust you."

"Well, that's good for starters. But if you want me to trust you, you'll have to give me something."

"My pod?"

"No. Give me your gun."

Zim was surprised. His what? "What makes you think I have a gun?"

"Zim, you work for the most heavily-armed organization in the Land of the Nicktoons. Of course they issued you a gun."

"They didn't issue me a gun."

"Why? Are you on probation?"

"No, because I don't work for them! I don't work for the most heavily armed organization anywhere!"

"That's possible, there are those rumors of that revolutionary group that's stockpiling weapons."

"Actually, them I work for."

She sighed. "Look Zim, come back when you're ready to deal straight with me, okay?"

"But-" She ignored him and got back to work.

He frowned. Where was he going to get a gun? No matter, right now he felt he should confront Dib and find out what was going on here. He started walking towards the door to Dib's office. As he was about to step through, Rana called out to him. "Sir, do you have an appointment?"

"I'm going in there to tell Dib my demands."

"I don't think you fully understand the chain of command around here. Pugsy and Bibi work for you, you and I work for Dib, who works for Bog, Emperor of Nick City."

"Well, I think it's time for a little corporate restructuring." He walked through the door, into Dib's office.

Will Zim manage to gain Rana's trust? Will he find out what's going on here? Will they escape from the island? Is poor Gir really dead? Find out next time…