TITLE: MILES TO GO
AUTHOR: Cascadia
TIME: 6 years pre-TPM, Obi-Wan is 19
RATING: PG or PG-13
CATEGORY: Drama/Angst, Non-Slash
SUMMARY: Padawan Obi-Wan is kidnapped by a Force-sensitive. Can he overcome without the Force? Without Qui-Gon?
ARCHIVE: Please ask first. Sites who have previously archived any of my stories may archive any of them that they want to without asking.
DISCLAIMER: All recognizable characters are the property of Lucasfilm Limited. All the rest belong to me. I receive absolutely no profit from this.




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CHAPTER 2 - ISOLATION



The Force was far away, like a soaring riko-bird - distant, unreachable, unable to be captured or grasped in hand. The gaping hole left by its absence loomed like a swirling blackhole, pulling and swallowing every attempt to escape its ferocious appetite. He knew that it was there. But every attempt to touch it was like trying to hold water in his hand. It lived and breathed around him, singing the never-ending songs of love and peace that rode on the wind, through the trees, along the gushing rivers and across the wide valleys. But now, a black void was all he could feel.

Its absence felt undeniably disturbing, leaving him insecure and with flickering feelings of helplessness. Having trusted in it and relied so heavily on it for his entire life, only to now have no awareness of it at all was utterly distressing. It was his life's anchor. And now, all of its precious remnants were missing, as a curtain of blindness surrounded him.

Where once there were the soothing, warming rays of balmy energy and ecstatic impulses now lay a vast wasteland of lingering emptiness and confusion - scattered to the winds of loss and abandonment.

It was gone... for now. He forced humble acceptance of his situation, assuring himself that it would return - eventually. But was he lying to himself? Would he ever return to the Temple? Would he ever see Qui-Gon again? Where once the Force filled him with brave certainty and tender assurances, now crept in doubts, fears, and near hopelessness.

Free of the ship's cargo hold, the full weight of his predicament began to set in. No Force. No Qui-Gon. No help.

As a gentle tropical breeze tenderly touched his face, he opened his eyes, taking in the environment where he knelt. The green, leafy vegetation and bright jewel-tone colors of blooming, twisted vines and exotic flowers waved flirtatiously, nodding in the soft winds - damp from the morning dew and drawn with divine perfection. Emerald plumes and curving, knotted tree trunks were painted with loving brushstrokes.

Sparkling sapphire-winged insects fluttered amidst the dew-covered petals, gathering stores of honey-flavored sustenance. Their low drone hummed with a lulling tenderness.

The thick early morning mist had ended only half an hour before, leaving the landscape awash in chilled, crisp droplets and clear puddles of fresh rainwater. Aromatic botanical scents lingered in the cool of the morning as a pungent perfume - seductively sweet and spicily exotic to the senses. The woody scents of the musky baccra, the zukk-rum, and the citric yeque tree rounded out a full bouquet of tropical ambrosia.

The transcendent glow of plum and rose washing with liquefied streaks of silver illuminated the waking dawn sky overhead - the brightness shining, blazing like the birth cycle of an undying paradise, perfect in all beauty, perfect in all mystery, perfect in all and all.

Perfect. Save for the looming absence of the Force.

The maddening silence of the Force sparked infant tendrils of panic, which were quickly quelled by the padawan's determined intent to remain at peace. He had dealt before with no Force connection, but that did not guarantee an easy battle.

He bit back the unease clawing at his fragile tranquility beneath the stoic facade a Jedi was expected to project. Outside, he appeared calm and at peace. But on the inside, a tiny flicker of fear lapped at his resolve, and he worried that any sheer temperament would not go unnoticed by his unwanted companion.

As a nineteen-year-old Jedi apprentice, he considered himself experienced enough to wade through the dangerously swirling tides of emotion. He could conquer this, he assured himself. With or without the Force. With or without help from any outside source. And - most importantly - without Qui-Gon, if need be. At least... he hoped so on all accounts.

Normally, Obi-Wan would not consider striving without the Force, but he presently had no choice. Qui-Gon would expect it of him in such a situation, and he could not disappoint his master. No, he could never do that - could never let him down, never hurt him by his own inadequacies.

He was sure Qui-Gon would not be coming for him. His master could not know where he was. He was probably still on Coruscant trying in vain to find his missing padawan.

It seemed Obi-Wan's only hope lay in his own ability to handle the stark situation.

A brightening luminosity from the exquisite arch of heaven overhead beckoned his attention to the clearing skies, glowing a purest celestial white.

Why is ideal beauty always hidden?

Here, on this sith-forsaken planet, at the far reaches of the Republic - strangely absent from navi-computers and star charts - breathed the most unimaginable, breathtaking place this padawan had ever seen.

His bright turquoise eyes dropped to the thick leather cord tightly encircling his wrists. The dark brown tether painfully dug into his flesh, chafing and bruising. It hadn't been there long. Only since last night when they crashed on this paradisiacal planet.

Now, he was a captive in an enchanted garden of delights.

Alerted to his companion's approach by the soft crunching of twigs underfoot, he looked up from his bound wrists.

Merrik Tennosa came around to the front of Obi-Wan and stopped in front of his Jedi captive, eyeing him contemptuously. Eyes dark and cold stared at the padawan, who met his gaze with placid grace.

Now his eyes bore hard into his captive, attempting to cultivate any seed of fear that may be there. So far, the padawan had remained serenely in control of his emotions.

Obi-Wan struggled to keep his exterior at peace while Tennosa stared at him. There was just an inking of fear that he subtly tried to squelch without giving away its presence. Although he wondered if his eyes gave away the internal struggle, he held the man's gaze trying to relay a sense of unshakable tranquility.

Tennosa stepped warily closer, swinging his blaster barrel up to point it at the padawan.

"Stand up," he gruffly ordered, his posture tensing.

After a moment's hesitation, Obi-Wan struggled to his feet, trying to keep from putting much pressure on his right ankle. It hurt considerably, but he kept a calm countenance even as a spike of pain shot through his ankle. In the back of his mind, he wondered if it had been broken in the crash. Whether broken or not, it was most assuredly in need of medical attention.

Obi-Wan's clothes - damp from the early morning mist - limply clung to his lithe frame. Their sticky sogginess stimulated an uncomfortable chill. He suppressed a mild shiver that threatened to surface and locked eyes with Tennosa, projecting a solid aura of peace. With the pain of his ankle - and the uncertainty of the future - he wondered how long he could maintain a stoic facade before he gave in to despair.

Tennosa stared into the padawan's eyes of soft turquoise. The captive's attractive, youthful features radiated grace and innate beauty - traits that Tennosa previously assumed would not be present in one trained for deadly combat. But looks could most definitely be deceiving, he reminded himself. No matter how easy it had been to capture the padawan, this one he would not underestimate.

To Tennosa, the padawan appeared a tower of unshifting confidence. But he knew that every being - no matter how strongly anchored - had a breaking point, where the mind's insecurities and uncertainties gave way to a waterfall of despair.

The padawan must feel at least a small stab of fear from his unwanted separation from the Force - a separation from his life's only constant support. And that was what Tennosa intended to use.

What he would ultimately do with the padawan, he wasn't sure. All that was sure was that he would learn more about the Force - more about a Jedi's thinking - by observing and questioning him.

He intended to take him back to his hidden mansion deep in the thick forest, but that was miles from here, and the rain forest offered its share of difficulties - from flora and fauna alike.

Tennosa cautiously circled around to the back of his captive. "Walk," he commanded, giving an ungentle nudge to Obi-Wan's shoulder.

Closing his mind to the pain, Obi-Wan took a tentative step forward, followed by another, and another, until he was walking a seemingly normal stride. But, oh, did it hurt.

He shook off the spiking pains in his ankle, and bit his lower lip to keep from crying out. He could make it, he encouraged himself. He could - and would.



~*~



A light rain fell through the leaves of the trees above them, drifting down to cover everything in a soft mist. The sound of the mistdrops splattering on the leaves and down to the moist ground below produced a steady, peaceful roar - while the emerald hues of the vegetation intensely brightened under the gentle wash of rain.

His inability to sense things through the Force forced him to completely take in things on a sensory level through sight, smell, taste, touch, and sound. The smell of the tropical flowers, the heady woods, the minty and bitter ferns, the passionate cooing by lavishly festive-feathered birds, the breathtaking visuals. It all seemed foreign to him with his lack of a connection to them through the Force - namely the Living Force.

That brought to mind his Jedi master. Qui-Gon's faith to that philosophy had sent their relationship into many conflicts in the past. While Obi-Wan could sense things in the past and future better than his master could, Qui-Gon lived in the moment.

But it was not that Obi-Wan disagreed with the Living Force, but his inner strengths lay far greater with the other Jedi philosophy - the Unifying Force.

Now the padawan had no such connection - whether Living or Unifying. And no way of dealing with his predicament apart from his other - less encompassing - senses. He'd used the Force to move inanimate objects, to strengthen weakened muscles, to move in synchronism with the ways of the mysterious, and to rise above pains that any non-sensitive would cave in to. But now pleasures - as well as pains - took their turn for his newfound captive attention.

The stabbing pain in Obi-Wan's ankle only increased the further they walked. It was all he could do to remain silent and not cry out from the blazing pain now consuming his foot and lower leg. They had walked for several hours, Obi-Wan estimated. Travelling at such a slow pace, he wondered how long it would take to reach Tennosa's mansion. He was not even aware of how far they had crashed from it. If it were very far, Obi-Wan felt sure he'd never make it on his ankle without the aid of the Force.

How he dearly wished they would stop - just for a little while - to rest his injury. But he would dare not mention the injury to his companion. He did not know what the man might do about it - whether help or aggravate the pain, for he weighed the risk too great to chance it.

Although he had been given nothing to eat since before they had crashed here the day before, he did not crave food. The plant extract that Tennosa had injected him with had numerous negative side effects - including nausea and dizziness as the two most prevalent. He remembered once when he was ten, after eating too many Alderaanian cream cones how his insides twisted and his stomach retched for relief that would not come. In the same way now, an insatiable, billowing nausea enveloped him, sending him into prolonged physical distress. Yet, through lack of sufficient bodily sustenance, his energy slowly drained from him.

"Stop," said Tennosa, with a hint of icy suspicion in his tone.

Halting as the light mist dripped off of him, the padawan kept his back to the man, praying that Tennosa could not sense anything from him. But, he warned himself, with Tennosa's slight Force skills, the man may indeed.

Tennosa strolled around to the front of the padawan, keeping the blaster trained on him.

"You're limping," he stated with a slight chuckle. His eyes of ebony held a taste of glee - however suffused with a hint of threat - at his new discovery.

A ripple of panic escaped the padawan before he desperately clamped it down. But the fear had already danced behind his eyes. Obi-Wan knew he had started limping, but hoped that it was too imperceptible for Tennosa to notice.

"Why have you not mentioned it?" the elder man asked, his baritone voice ominously low. "Were you afraid of what I might do?" the volatility evident in his tone.

Swallowing as much unease as he could, Obi-Wan answered, "what if I was?" His voice wavered slightly.

"Are you afraid of me?" Tennosa asked, stepping closer, purposefully invading Obi-Wan's personal space.

"N- no," replied the padawan, never looking away from his captor's gaze.

"Yes, you are, but you won't admit it," the elder man spat out - his eyes ablaze, searching the padawan's face. "Is that something they teach you at the Temple? To lie about being afraid, to deny perfectly natural emotions? Or are you not a fine specimen of Jedi discipline?"

Gathering a cloak of courage, Obi-Wan answered him. "You don't understand the Jedi. We can't deny emotion, it's real and natural. There's no one who can live without emotions. It's what we do with them that makes us-"

"And what do you do with them?" Tennosa interrupted.

"We release them to the Force," Obi-Wan said quietly, unsure why he was debating Jedi philosophy with this man.

"There is no emotion; there is peace," Tennosa quickly recited. "So what does this mean? You release your emotions to the Force and it gives you peace?" he asked.

"Yes," the padawan replied quietly.

"But what's wrong with emotion?" asked Tennosa.

"Nothing - as long as we don't let them control our actions," Obi-Wan said.

"So are you letting your fear of me control your actions?"

Obi-Wan considered what he was asking. He knew that he'd kept his injury a secret because he feared what Tennosa would do to him. So in a sense, Tennosa was right. But he was loath to admit it.

"Yes, you are," Tennosa answered for him, his eyebrows raising in triumph.

"But I can't feel the Force," Obi-Wan said, exasperated.

"So that's your excuse, is it? All of your training is in vain without the Force to control your actions?" Tennosa reasoned.

"No," the padawan said, with rising annoyance. "It's not in vain. We couldn't use the Force as well without it. And the Force doesn't just control us, but it also obeys our commands."

"So it's a give and take? You give it your swelling emotions, which you have admitted that you have, and it - in return - gives you peace that you can't achieve without it," he excitedly stated.

"Yes," the padawan answered emphatically.

"Then you have no peace," Tennosa said in conclusion. "Your fear has no place to go." The excitement fled from Tennosa's eyes and was replaced by a cold, cruel stare.

As Obi-Wan felt his slim resolve slipping, his heart pounded nervously in his chest. Tennosa knew he felt afraid of him now, and would undoubtedly use it to his advantage in some way. Now, this revelation opened up a ripe field of naked vulnerability for his captor to use and abuse. He felt a small brush of despair hacking away at his shining tower of hope.

"Now, shall we continue?" said Tennosa, his smooth voice laced with menace. His hateful eyes held the padawan's, sending dark wisps of terror straight to the padawan's soul.

Grabbing Obi-Wan's arm with a bruising grip, Tennosa roughly propelled him forward, along the way they had been travelling. But with his weakened ankle caught off guard, he landed on his stomach on the moist ground, the air forced from his lungs from the impact. Gasping for breath, the padawan instinctively reached for help from the Force and felt an overwhelming panic when it was not there.

Before he could adequately recover, Tennosa jerked him to his feet. The padawan instinctively pulled back from the bruising grip attempting to free himself - which proved difficult with his wrists bound.

In a split second, Tennosa had Obi-Wan pushed back against the trunk of a knobby tree. Then he said quietly, "I will not hurt you, if you will cooperate. Do you understand me?" his dangerously low voice asked, as his grip stilled Obi-Wan's movements.

Avoiding the man's eyes, Obi-Wan nodded tightly, although he felt unsure whether to believe him or not. He reached for what calm he could scrounge from his low reserves. Trying to cope without the Force was never an easy task - especially when it was all he had been taught his whole life. And Tennosa had given him no reason to trust him, with the killing of the Bith as the first - and foremost - event in the padawan's mind of why not to.

"Now, I think I should warn you that it would be detrimental to you to try to escape," Tennosa continued. "There are many things here that you have no knowledge about. For instance," he pointed to a large azure-petalled flower. "This flower is extremely poisonous to any human. Any light touch to its thorns and you'd be dead within three hours. There are many other dangers of which I will not tell you unless necessary. So for your own safety, I suggest you do as I say. Do you understand me?"

Obi-Wan cautiously nodded, slowly raising his eyes to Tennosa's.

With a cold smile, Tennosa went on lyrically, "I know of a place we can stop to rest for awhile - and if need be - we can stay there overnight. For we would dare not want to be left out in the open in the dark. There are many creatures that would not take kindly to... intruders."

Tennosa bent to the ground to retrieve the small satchel of supplies recovered from the ship, then set off through the wet vegetation, pulling Obi-Wan after him.

Emerging from a dense cropping of waving vegetation, they came to an abrupt stop. Tennosa pulled Obi-Wan around in front of him to see why they had stopped.

Before them stood a humongous tree - hundreds of feet thick in diameter, huge limbs stretching and turning in a pattern of chaos, draped with rain-covered limp round leaves. The tree seemed to pass beyond where the surrounding vegetation began, and snaked far out into the forest.

"Come. Our haven awaits." Tennosa's upswept eyes sparkled with excitement. He dragged the padawan after him to the base of the tree.

Obi-Wan watched as Tennosa removed a rope from his satchel and flung one end of it up over a limb above their heads.

Catching the rope's end as it came down over the limb, Tennosa turned to Obi-Wan. "You first," he said as he looped the rope and placed it around the padawan's waist. "See that dark hollowed out hole up about twenty feet?" he asked, pointing.

"Yes," Obi-Wan answered, reluctant to receive any instruction from this man.

"When I pull you up to that, swing in there and then free yourself of the rope so I can come up too."

Obi-Wan hesitated. "What about my hands?" he asked, raising his bound wrists in a show of handicap.

A half smile graced Tennosa's face. "I think you can make it like that. And don't try anything once you get up there," he added, as he pulled the rope taut.



~*~



Climbing through the hole, Obi-Wan pulled the rope off of him and tossed it back out. Then he sat for a moment, waiting for his eyes to adjust to the darkness.

It appeared to be a large, cavernous recess - very deep and very high ceilinged, with the smell of dank wood and warm in contrast to the cool misty air outside. The floor was shiny smooth, other than the scattered leaves. He scooted further into the darkness as he heard Tennosa nearing the nook's mouth.

Tennosa cleared the opening and pulled the rest of the rope in, coiling it up carefully. Then he stood and walked further into the recess.

Obi-Wan saw a glow rod spark to life suddenly, illuminating Tennosa's hard features.

"Come and eat," Tennosa quietly ordered as he sat and started rummaging through his satchel.

"I don't want anything to eat," Obi-Wan replied, swallowing convulsively as he fought a sudden upsurge of nausea.

A bark of laughter erupted from Tennosa. "Yes. I suppose so. That judka extract is rather nasty, isn't it?" A smile graced his lips as he turned, taking in the padawan's sickly appearance. Still at the mouth of the tree-cave Obi-Wan sat - shoulders slumped, head bowed, clothes drenched, and lightly shivering from the cool breeze blowing in the cave.

He would have to congratulate himself later on this slow deterioration of a Jedi padawan - but not just any padawan. He knew who this one was. Of course, it was a pure accident that this one happened to be the one most convenient to kidnap. But still, he found the irony laughable.

"You must eat something," Tennosa persuaded. "You'll die without nourishment."

"Does it matter?" Obi-Wan grumbled, more to himself.

"It does if you want to see Jinn again," Tennosa teasingly said, enjoying the recognition dawn on the padawan as he lifted his head to look at him.

After a short silence, Obi-Wan started, "How did you-"

"It doesn't matter," interrupted Tennosa with a smile. "What does matter, is that you're here with me, and Jinn knows nothing about it. Now... come here and eat something."

Considering his options, the padawan decided it would prove foolish to attempt climbing down the tree with his trussed wrists and injured ankle. With that thought conceded, he crawled closer to Tennosa, keeping a safe distance from him.

Tennosa handed Obi-Wan a small ration bar.

"No more slimy soup?" said the padawan with a tone of heavy sarcasm, as he took the proffered bar.

Tennosa chuckled lightly before answering. "I couldn't bring the liquid rations, and besides, what I DID bring is enough to get where we're going." He leaned back against the wall of the wooden cave, eating a bar similar to the one he had given Obi-Wan.

"Where ARE we going?" the padawan asked.

Pausing to swallow, Tennosa said, "to my hide-out - my home on this little planet."

Obi-Wan's mind drifted back over the last few days. After sneaking out of the Temple to find his master a gift, he found himself easily tricked and shanghaied away to this planet by a man intent on learning more about the Force. A tiny thread of worry ran through his thoughts, through his dreams at night, through his actions, and the Force was distant - offering no needed comfort in this tragic predicament. Inhaling deeply, he refocused his conscious thoughts back to the present. If there was any way to escape this, any way to return to his chosen life, then he would have to keep himself focused and wary.

Looking at the small ration bar Tennosa had given him, Obi-Wan forced himself to eat a few bites, despite his sickly churning stomach. As he ate he wondered how Tennosa knew about Master Qui-Gon, and why he was handing him the slight ray of hope of seeing his master again.

Lost in his thoughts, Obi-Wan was suddenly startled when Tennosa grabbed him, pinning him against the wood floor, and pressed something painful to his throat.

"Time for another injection," Tennosa informed the padawan who was trying to extricate himself from Tennosa's tight hold on him - a hold that Obi-Wan felt sure was Force-enhanced. Given the man's isolated study of the Force - or so the padawan assumed, from what Tennosa had told him - Tennosa had a good command of some Force abilities, while other skills appeared to be sorely lacking, such as sensing Obi-Wan's emotions. Tennosa could pick up on some of the padawan's feelings, he was sure, but Tennosa also displayed a very unpredictable grasp of that ability.

Unable to free himself from Tennosa's hold, Obi-Wan soon felt a sharp sting, herding in a fresh swell of nausea and dizziness. He was surprised at how fast the drug seemed to affect him this time. With the initial injection Tennosa gave him when he first kidnapped him, the symptoms took a few minutes before he felt anything. Considering this was only his second injection, the padawan surmised that the drug lasted a few days in his system before wearing off. That meant that his chances of regaining the Force would not come for a few more days. Until then, he was stuck without it.


TBC