AN: These are fun to write. ^^;; They're also an excuse to procrastinate my 15 page Pop Culture paper. ^^;; Shhhhh!! I'm showing my rather diverse tastes off, aren't I? Aerosmith, U2, Crosby, Stills and Nash, as well as George Gershwin, and now Loreena McKennitt… ^^;; Oh well, enjoy. Oh, and as for you who read "Avant Garden" I'm sorry, it'll be a while before I get any more of that done… Exams suck and sonfics are easier to write quickly. ^^;;

Disclaimer: I don't own Cowboy Bebop, or "The Dark Night of the Soul" which belongs to Loreena McKennitt. Shoo you evil lawyers.

*
Upon a darkened night
the flame of love was burning in my breast
And by a lantern bright
I fled my house while all in quiet rest
*

I couldn't believe it. He… He DID it. He KNEW. How did he know? How did he find out? Was I that obvious? Not that it matters anymore. I had flown off to be by myself. He had told me he still loved Julia and that had upset me, cos I thought then that I would never know what it was like to be with Spike. Sure he drives me insane… but there's something about him that's just… addicting.

The way he smirks, the way he watches people, the way he rolls his eyes, the way he lays on the couch, the way he walks, the way he sighs, the way he whines when there's no meat… I would go insane with boredom if he wasn't around.

The way he pretends not to care, the way his eyes light up at a challenge, the way he teases, the way he kisses… I get shivers down my spine just remembering it.

I stared out the window at the stars. We were back in space, moving toward Venus. I smoked my cigarette slowly and just stared. I should probably get some sleep, everyone else is in bed… but for some reason I'm too worked up to sleep. Every time I close my eyes, all I see is Spike, smiling down at me.

*
Shrouded by the night
and by the secret star I quickly fled
The veil concealed my eyes
while all within lay quiet as the dead
*

I leaned against the glass and sighed contentedly. It had been uncertain at first, as if he wasn't sure how I was going to react. Either he was scared I was going to slug him or he was afraid to break me. Maybe a little of both.

I touched my lips unconsciously and smiled. It had been nice. I had tangled my fingers in his messy hair while trying to figure out what he tasted like.

Cigarettes and Ramen.

I chuckled to myself as I remembered. It certainly wasn't what I had expected him to taste like. Though I guess I had some overly romantic notions as to how Spike would taste, I should have known it would be cigarettes and food, his two favourite things in the universe.

I walked off the bridge, planning to watch some television, since I couldn't seem to sleep. In the common room, Ein was sleeping on the floor near the stairs. I saw Spike was awake, and carrying Ed to the couch; she had fallen asleep on the stairwell again. I wonder how she does it…

"Hiya," I whispered quietly. Spike looked up at me and smiled slightly as he set Ed down on the couch.

"Hi," he replied quietly.

"You know, she'll end up on the floor again…"

"I know, but I'll feel better if I put her on the couch for now."

You know, it's funny that he says he doesn't care, but then turns around and does things like that.

*
Oh night thou was my guide
oh night more loving than the rising sun
Oh night that joined the lover
to the beloved one
transforming each of them into the other
*

"So what are you doing up?" I shrugged.

"I can't seem to sleep…"

"Yeah, me neither."

I walked over to the chair and flopped down in it. Spike pulled up another chair and spun it around, sitting on it backwards, and rested his arms on the back of the seat.

It took me a moment to realise he was watching me.

"What?"

"Nothing."

"Why are you looking at me like that then?"

"Cos I like looking at you."

I could feel my face flush and I looked away from him. I could feel his eyes on me though, it was a strange feeling. He had his whole attention on me. There was no dreaminess there, no half-awake, half in a dream air around him. He was focused upon me and me alone. It was strange… but nice. It made me feel… wanted.

*
Upon that misty night
in secrecy, beyond such mortal sight
Without a guide or light
than that which burned so deeply in my heart.
*

Spike rested his chin on his arms and watched me squirm. He was enjoying the effect he was having on me. The silence was broken at the sound of Ed rolling over and mumbling something about spaghetti. I levelled my own gaze at him and smirked.

"Is there anything else you want? …Other than to look at me, that is…"

A sly grin spread across his face and I instantly regretted speaking those lines.

"Well…" I swallowed nervously. As much as I love him, I don't trust him when he's grinning slyly at me.

"What?"

"You could take a walk with me," he replied finally, standing up. I breathed out. He enjoys making me squirm in apprehension and then saying something totally opposite of what I thought he was going to say… One of these days I'm gonna smack him for it. Spike stuck his hands in his pockets and wait for me to climb out of the chair.

"Where are we going?" I asked. He offered me his elbow.

"This way," he replied, waiting. I stared at him uncertainly for a moment, and then slipped my arm through his. He only smiled at me and began to walk down the hall.

*
That fire t'was led me on
and shone more brightly than of the midday sun
To where he waited still
it was a place where no one else could come
*

I was a little nervous about where he was taking me, but there weren't many places we could end up… The Bebop isn't THAT big. Wait a sec… this is the way to the hanger… why are we going there?

"Are we going to the hanger?" He glanced back at me.

"Yup."

"Why?"

"Cos it's less crowded there."

…Well, so is my room, but I'm not going to suggest that. He turned on the lights to the hanger and led me over to a corner, where he sat down. I watched him for a second, and he glanced up at me.

"Is there something wrong?"

"Oh… no…" I replied and sat next to him. It was nice and quiet out in the hanger. It was far enough away from the engine that someone could easily fall asleep out here and have no interruptions for a while. I had a feeling that Spike knew this. As a matter of fact… now that I think about it… This is probably where Spike disappears to all the time, when he's not on the couch. It wouldn't surprise me. He leaned back against the wall and lit a cigarette. Then offered one to me. I stared at him for a second, shocked.

"What?" he murmured with the cigarette still in his mouth.

"…You're offering to share one your precious cigarettes with me?"

"…Why not? We've shared much more unhygienic things…" he replied, winking at me. I took the cigarette and blushed slightly at the memory. "You seemed to have enjoyed it as well," he said a-matter-of-factly as he held out a flame. I lit my cigarette and leaned against the wall, glaring at him.

"I don't seem to remember you complaining either…" I smiled satisfactorily as he choked on the nicotine he had just inhaled and watched him blush a little.

*
Oh night thou was my guide
oh night more loving than the rising sun
Oh night that joined the lover
to the beloved one
transforming each of them into the other
*

"You're blushing," I pointed out, taking a nice, long drag from the cigarette. He stubbed out his own cigarette and put it back into the pack, half unfinished. His eyes were watering a little from the smoke going down the wrong pipe.

"I am not," he mumbled, trying to hide under his hair. I grinned, enjoying the moment thoroughly.

"You know, you're really cute when you blush…"

"Yeah, well… so are you." I looked over at him, as he glared at me out of the side of his eye. I only smiled innocently and took another drag from the cigarette.

"Am I?"

"…Yes…"

I grinned at him and leaned over, kissing him on the cheek.

"You're sweet."

"…Whatever…" he said, rolling his eyes. I leaned my head on his shoulder, put my cigarette out, and smiled softly. I could sleep like this…

I felt him stiffen a bit as I leaned against him, but he relaxed after a moment, and then adjusted himself so that he could lean into the corner and I could use him as a pillow. I closed my eyes and smiled again as he hesitantly put his arm around me.

This is nice…

*
Within my pounding heart
which kept itself entirely for him
He fell into his sleep
beneath the cedars all my love I gave
From o'er the fortress walls
the wind would brush his hair against his brow
And with its smoothest hand
caressed my every sense it would allow
*

"Spike?"

Silence.

"…Spike?"

Silence.

I shifted my weight and glanced up at him. He was asleep. I sat up carefully, so as not to wake him, and studied him for a moment. Every detail, no matter how insignificant, I wanted to remember it forever. The way his hair fell across his eyes, and his mouth, his eyelashes, the fraction of movement that he made when he breathed in, all of it. I reached up carefully and brushed his hair away from his eyes, and then let my hand slide down the side of his face. He shifted a little, but didn't wake up.

*
Oh night thou was my guide
oh night more loving than the rising sun
Oh night that joined the lover
to the beloved one
transforming each of them into the other
*

I stared at his mouth. I had a sudden urge to kiss him. Partly to see what would happen and partly to make sure I wasn't dreaming. I leaned forward carefully and hesitated for a second… Then I kissed him. Very softly, I didn't want to wake him up.

After a second I could feel pressure being applied back, and I realised he was awake. I gasped slightly in embarrassment, having been caught, but he took advantage of me in the gasp and deepened the kiss.

Oh God… When Spike kisses me… the… the whole world disappears. His focus is upon me and me alone, everything else just disappears, it's like I get pulled into that dream world of his, and can't get back out again.

Not that I'd want to.

After a moment I broke the kiss and looked at him breathlessly. He was staring… no, not staring… it was more than staring… I can't even describe it… It made me feel like I was the only person in the world. I took a deep breath and laid my head on his chest, only to realise he was breathing just as heavily as I was. I could feel his hand stroking my hair softly, and he kissed the top of my head.

I close my eyes sleepily… Just as I drifted off to sleep… I could hear myself whisper something to him.

"…I love you Spike…"

*
I lost myself to him
and laid my face upon my lovers breast
And care and grief grew dim
as in the mornings mist became the light
There they dimmed amongst the lilies fair
there they dimmed amongst the lilies fair
there they dimmed amongst the lilies fair...