Chapter Nine: Truth of Mistake
Meryl wiped her tears, and stared down at her boots. Vash slowly walked up to her, and stood in front of her. She leaned even more into the door.
She finally spoke.
"Were you listening the whole time?"
She whispered. Vash gave an apologetic grin as he pressed a hand in an embarrassed fashion to his head.
"Yeah... but it was Wolfwood's idea! Don't blame me."
Meryl squeezed her eyes shut, feeling a few more tears surface and spill over.
Courage, Meryl, courage, she thought.
She suddenly snapped her head up, her eyes opening to look at Vash straight on.
"I'm sorry!!"
She blurted out.
"I'm sorry! I'm sorry I pretended all this time that it wasn't my fault when it was! I'm sorry I cried out."
Tears brimmed and spilled over, but she didn't break eye-contact.
"I know when you shot that man, it was because of us screaming. Milly hasn't felt pain too often, so you can't blame her. But I have, I've experienced that kind of thing once or twice."
She brushed at her tear-stained cheeks roughly before continuuing.
"But I still cried out. I still screamed. You heard me, didn't you? It was because of us-- no, me. I should have kept it in. Vash-san, I'm sorry I didn't. I ... I..."
What was she trying to say? She tried to sort herself out, and closed her eyes tightly. She raised her right hand to press a palm to her dampened cheek, to relieve herself of the emotions she was trying so hard to keep from surfacing.
Vash took her hand into his, and took a firm grip onto it.
"Open your eyes."
He said. She reluctantly opened her eyes, and looked into his aqua ones.
The eyes she had been looking into just now had been shielded from any emotion, but now, Meryl saw depth. He took her hand, spread her fingers using his and exposed the palm before showing the vertically forming scar to her.
"What do you see?"
Meryl blinked in confusion.
"What?"
"Tell me what you see."
"I-I...I see my hand."
"What do you see on your hand?"
His voice was calm and collected. Meryl felt the opposite, but managed to keep some of her composure to respond.
"There's... a cut."
"Not a cut."
Meryl swallowed.
"Okay... a gash. It's a gash. So?"
"Tell me how you got that gash."
Meryl glanced away.
"Uh, someone stabbed it."
"Who?"
"Yesterday. That group of bandits that attacked the bus. One of them stabbed my hand."
Vash tightened his grip on her wrist.
"Don't look away. Tell me how you got it."
Meryl bit her lip, despite the memories it brought up, and looked at him, and the gash he was showing her.
"It's not a serious gash,"
She said.
"Don't change the subject."
Damn it, he's serious, Meryl thought.
"Okay. Someone tried to attack you, so I shoved my hand in the way."
She said truthfully, trying her best to sound off-handed.
Vash leaned down, and released her wrist so he could look at her right in the eye. She shifted a little; he was too close for comfort. But she returned eye-contact, and saw that his eyes carried that strange depth again.
"Listen to me. That day I shot Legato, it is true that perhaps I could have not. But thinking back, I think I needed to have shot Legato. Because if I didn't, I would've never realised the truth of mistake."
Meryl raised an eyebrow in question.
"Truth of mistake?"
"Yeah. You see, the truth of mistake lies in the fact that you learn from your mistakes."
He smiled.
"I never would've learnt that if it wasn't for you. Okay? I may have saved your life several times, but you've saved mine in a way I think you need to understand.
"I was once told by someone I loved that killing is not the answer. However, the same person told me that if I truly want to understand something, I must learn from it.
"Killing Legato was not the answer, but it should have taught me of my mistake. However, I didn't accept that mistake, and I might have never been able to if you hadn't told that man not to shoot."
Meryl blinked again.
"If I hadn't accepted my mistake, I would've never been able to carry on with life. So you saved my life. You've also saved my life physically a number of times. The time with the lousy sheriff, the time in the sandsteamer... and yesterday."
His hand found hers below, and he held it, gently pressing his thumb to the gash.
"This scar is the proof of that. We're equal. You have nothing to be sorry about."
He laughed lightly.
"I forgot to thank you. Thanks for saving my butt again yesterday."
Meryl felt her cheeks warm. He leaned in even closer, causing her blush to deepen as he looked at her incredulously.
"Are you blushing??"
She snatched her hand away from his and ducked around him.
"N-n-no! No! Of course not."
She found that she couldn't look at him now for an entirely different reason.
She heard Vash laugh again. Meryl sucked in her breath, feeling her blush fade. She rubbed at her tear-stained cheeks. She might as well say thank you since he had.
"You've saved all of our lives many times, not only me. So thank you, Vash-san."
He let out a very different laugh now - a very obnoxious one. Meryl turned to see him with his nose in the air, laughing his head off.
"NYAH--haahaahahaha! Of course! I save lives all the time - it's a profession!"
Meryl rolled her eyes.
Typically Vash, nonetheless.
"Hai, hai, Vash-san. Here."
She tossed the keys of 203 to him, and then fumbled around her cloak pockets for 204. Then she remembered with a groan.
"Oh dammit! Milly has the keys."
Vash inserted the key to 203, twisted and pushed the door open.
"Come in here until they come back then."
He said logically.
"Uhm... well..."
Meryl lingered outside for a moment as he walked in before walking in after him.
She had to stop being afraid.
