asalways07.html It's over.

The rush of adrenaline fades, but its shadow stays behind, flickering like a dying coal. I can taste the remnants of our last kiss as I lick my already wet lips. I scent of the heavy air, the smell of his and my sweat mix in my lungs, a concoction of vibrant passion that makes my head swim. I can feel his hands still pressing on my back, his breath on my face, my arms around his neck.

We are caught in a perfect moment.

I open my eyes. Dilandau's eyes look back at me.

"You," he says, between breaths, "Are dismissed."

The hands on my back relax. I start to move away, but suddenly he pulls me towards him again, "No one," he says coldly, "No one is to know about this. Is that understood?"

"Mm-hm." I nod, and swallow nervously, "Yes, Lord Dilandau."

"Good." The hands relax again. I roll over climb out of the bed, stand, and begin to dress. Not another word is spoken as I do.

I leave.

My Gods... What the hell just happened?

I stand with one hand on the door, out of breath, staring at the wall opposite. I'm exhausted yet full of energy, trembling all over and yet serenly content. I feel as if I just did something terrible, and yet... It was the best thing that ever happened to me.

It's very confusing.

I don't know how long I just stand there looking at nothing before I realize that the thing to do right now is to get as far way from Dilandau's chamber as possible before someone finds me here. I begin to walk away.

Just as I enter the main corridor of the Vione, some soldiers pass by. I feel myslef blsying. How am I going to face the other Dragon Slayers now...?

My question is answered when suddenly Gatti comes running up to me. "Hey, Cherandle, there you are... We were looking for you. How come you never showed up for dinner?"

Uh-oh. Better think fast. "Oh, I just went for a walk..."

"Kestrel said you had gone back to the training room to get your sword... He said you told him you'd catch up."

"Oh..." I say, "...he must've misheard me. I said, ah... Not to wait up. I wasn't really that hungry, anyway." Oh, great. Way to be inconspicuous, girlfriend. But at least there's no way he'll guess what really happened...

"Hmm." he says, "Well, anyway, we should get back with the others... We'll need to rest up these next few days before the attack on Fried."

Phew. Crisis diverted. "All right. I could use some rest right about now..."

*

CLANG!

I barely block the downwards strike that Guimel's guymelef has dealt me.

Mock battles. Emerpor Dornkirk has ordered an attack on the small country of Freid. That means training. Dilandau's been training us- hard- since sun-up.

I don't mind. I'd rather be doing this than doing nothing and having to dwel in my thoughts.

I'm not trying to pretend that what happened yesterday actualy meant anything. Lord Dilandau just needed to relieve some of his tension- not that it worked. Just this morning we fouind out that later in the night he had gone out and torched and Asturian city just because the Dragon was there.

Why didn't you try to stop him?

Because I didn't want to at the time.

Head and heart. Those two are at it again.

Well, you really should've. This kind of stuff probably isn't allowed in the army.

He would've hit me if I had resisted... Besides, Father said it was okay that I had met someone.

Oh, and did Father give you permission to lose your virginity to a complete maniac?

I shut them up long enough to get an inside shot and administer the "killing blow".

Well, no... He didn't.

Head- One. Heart- Zero.

*

Dinnertime.

I've gotten used to the military menu by now- anyway, it's better than some of the stuff I was forced to eat out in the wilderness... And it's better than nothing at all, which I've also faced before.

Everyone is excited and exhilerated from the training today. Across the table from me, Migel nad Viole are engaged in a converstaion about guymelef technique. I'm talking with Palem.

"Anyway, I've been thinking for a long time about what you said, Cherandle," she says with a smile, "About my not having a problem with violence..." she pauses, "My Dad was an ex-soldier. He was always training me hard in roder for me to follow in his footsteps. He was the one who convinced me I had a problem with violence... 'If you keep being scared like that you'll never be a soldier', he used to say. And it was he who signed me up to be in the Dragon Slayers." She shakes hr head, "But I wound up going of my own free will. I wanted to prove him wrong. And then I realized... Or, I think I did... Maybe it was all part of his training. To spur me on. To make me want to prove him wrong. You helped me realize it, Cherandle. I want to thank you."

I smile back, "Maybe you should write him a letter."

"I think I will." A few people who are done are beginning to stand up and leave. The two od us are among them. "And thanks again, Cherandle... I think you have a real knack for seeing the truth in things."

"Thank you, Palem." We turn and leave. I'm feeling very much at peace... I think that little moment of tranquility calmed me down a lot.

The calm doesn't last long.

As our small group of Slayers passes a side hallway, a hand grabs mine and wrenches me into the darkness. Another hand places itself over my mouth. The smell of leather fills my nostrils.

"Not a sound," says a whispered voice. I know who it is. He pulls me furthur into the darkness and into another side hallway. The hand is removed from my mouth.

My back is to the wall.

"Lord Dilandau..." I say quietly, "With all due respect, sir... I must ask you someting-"

"You may not." Dilandau sayd. I am about to speak again, but I stop. He's kissing me.

"Mmm..." I almost surrender before I remember that my goal is to not go through this again. "But... Lord... Dilandau..." I say between kisses. I doubt he's listening to me, but I keep talking, "Don't... you think... that... we..." I trail off. "Mmm." I say agin, and start to return with kisses of my own. I put my arms around his neck. It feels so good...

There is a short pause. My eyes are closed, but I can hear the smirk in Dilandau's voice.

"Don't tell me you didn't enjoy it last time..."

Round two- a point for the heart.

*
"Kestrel- you see anyting?" Viole's voice says.

"No, nothing yet..."

I look through my guymelef's eyepeice. It's awfully dark- the trees stretch like an endless sea below us.

"Go get the others- We're going dragon hunting." That was what Dilandau said. When I arrived at the barracks, half the team was already in their pajamas. And I didn't need an alibi this time; everyone was so occupied with getting back into training mode that they seemed to forget I had gone missing at all.

We were divided up into three groups- Dilandau took Gatti, Migel, Chesta, and Dalet. I was assigned to a group along with Kestrel, Malenla, Corran, and Viole. Vilols is our unofficial leader for this expedition. The final group, which includes everyone not mentioned thus far, is being led by Guimel. Our mission is to locate a dragon, slay it, and bring back the Energist, although Malenla says- and I agree with her- that that's not really what we're looking for.

"I think I see something," says Ville, "Okay, people, let's move in." Her guymelef begins to descend into the forest. We follow her, land, and get out of our guymelefs. Sure enough- the sound of dragon footsteps can be heard not too far off. Remembering my last encounter with a dragon, I feel my blood run cold. I draw my sword and look to Viole. She smiles at me. There's a message in her smile- "It's okay; I'm here to preotect 'ya." I smile back. After all this time I've almost begun to see Viole as a big sister I never had.

She tuns away from me, reverting back to leader mode. "All right, let's go. Corran- you stay here and listen for messages. Keep an eye on the guymelefs, too."

"Yes, m'am," he says with a jokey grin.

"The rest of you- come on." Viole says, and we start to make our way into the forest.

The footsteps are getting louder. Viole peers around a tree. The dragon is very near.

"It's just a kid," she whispers to us, "It's fire glands aren't fully developed yet. This should be easy."

"No parents?" Kestrel says.

"I can't hear any," says Viole, still whispering, "It may be orphaned, but keep on the lookout, okay?"

I can see the dragon now. It's passing us by.

"Gotcha," says Malenla, her sword at the ready, "Let's slice that lizard!"

"Right!" Viole nods. She draws her sword with a shhing and points it at the monster, "CHARGE!"

We run, yelling like maniacs, towards the beast. It runs and screeches, a much higher-pitched screech than that of a full-grouwn dragon.

"Surround it!" Viole commands, and we take spots around the dragon. I, for some unfathomable reason, wind up staring it in the face. the dragon screeches again and charges me.

"Cherandle!" I hear Kestrel shout as I ruin to my right, winging the sword wildly. In a lucky swing, I cut off the tip of its tongue. The dragon stops charging. The peice of tongue rolls and flops at my feet, a smelly, bloody mass of dragon flesh.

I think I'm gonna be sick.

"Hey Zarain! Stay focused!" That's Malenla. She beings me out of my trance. While the dragon was sidetracked by its wounded tongue, Kestrel was able to get in and make a small slice in the side of its belly. It has now turned its attention on him- Malenla and Viole are doing their best to take advantage of the situation. I join in the fray.

With a terrific leap and a triumphant yell, Malenla jams her sword into one of the dragon's eye sockets, "Yeah! Take that, dragon!" Green blood dreches her face and arms before she lands. The dragon has now turned what sight it has left on her.

"We're wounding it, but we're not doing any serious damage!" Viole shouts, "We need one good shot!"

"Yeah, well, maybe if you'd stop blabbin' and let us concentrate!" Malenla says with a smirk. I have to admire her bravery for staring down this dragon, and with a smile on her face, no less. It seems as if she almost enjoys it.

The dragon snaps at Malenla. She lightly and quickly jumps out of the way.

I turn and find myself face-to-face with Viole. Almost automatically, we look to the side. the slit that Kestrel made in the dragon's flesh gapes at us like a fish's gill.

"You thinkin' what I'm thinkin'?" Viole asks, readying her sword.

"I hope so!" I say.

Viole shoves her sword into one end of the wound. I take the other. And we both run liuke heck in opposite directions.

The dragon gives one last feeble, cracked screech as it falls dead. We all stand in silence for a moment.

Then Viole speaks, "Care to do the honors, Kestrel?" she asks him because he just happens to be standing closest to where the Energist is found.

Kestrel cuts into the dragon corpse with his sword. I wonder how he can see anything when his glasses are covered in dragon blood. But he removes the Energist andtosses it over the decaying dragon to Viole, "Catch."

We all stand still until the blood has evaporated along with the body. There is a far-off screech.

I start, and turn in the direction of the noise. "Parents?" I ask Viole nervously.

"Maybe," she says, looking in that direction as well, "But our work's done here, and it's nowhere near the guymelefs. Let's head back."

We turn and walk back towards the guymelefs. We start going faster when we recogniuze a message coming in. As the guymelefs come into view, I can see Corran perches on top of his, a rather worried expression on his face. He looks up and notices us coming.

"Um, guys..." he says, "You might wanna hear this..."

We all climb up on our respective guymelefs. I recognize Gatti's voice.

"-ione immediately." Is the first thing I hear as I climb my guymelef, "I repeat- a Dragon Slayer has been captured. Return to the Vione immediately..."

"We hear you, Gatti," says Viole into the communicator, "Who's been taken?"

Gatti pauses, "...It was Migel, Viole. They got him."

*

We're all getting ready to go to sleep- for real this time- but I don't think many of us are going to sleep too well tonight. The Dragon Slayers have become like a family, especially to those of us who have been here from the beginning. Viole is one. When I notice her lying despondently on her bunk, staring upwards, I decide to have a talk with her.

"Um, Viole... You wanna talk?" I ask. She nods, and follows me out of the barracks, "You okay?"

"Yeah, I'm... I'll be all right," she wipes at her eyes, "It's just that... well... Migel slept above me, and..."

"Oh, Viole..." I say, giving her a hug. She hugs back, and rests her head on my shoulder. "He'll come back, okay? He's smart, he's really smart. He'll be okay."

"Mm-hm." She sniffs, and I feel her nod.

"Well, isn't this a touching scene." We turn. Malenla is standing in the doorway, and I would've thought her remark sarcastic if she hadn't had such a nice smile on her face. She tosses her head towards the inside of the room, "C'mon. We'd better get our rest." We follow her into the barracks, our arms around each other's shoulders.

Pretty much everyone is lying down in thier bunks now. I give Viole a pat on the back, "Sweet dreams, okay?"

"Yeah," she smiles, "You too." She goes towards he bunk. I go in the opposite direction, towards mine.

"Is she okay?" Kestrel asks quietly, as I climb to my bunk.

"Yeah. She'll be fine." I nod, and continue the ascent.

I'm asleep almost as soon as my head hits the pillow.

*

I open my eyes.

I'm lying in a bed- not my bunk. Dilandau's bed. But I'm alone in it. There's no one else here- no one else in the room. It's dark. I lie under the covers in my nightclothes.

Slowly, a figure begins to materialize over me. It's Dilandau, lying on top of me on his front. He's wearing nightclothes, too.

"You can't escape me, you know," he says once he is fully materialized.

"But I don't want to feel like I have to escape you..." I say. My voice is quiet and choked. I reach up, put my arms around him, and begin to kiss him.

I can't escape my feelings. Even in my dreams.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

A/N: Bah. School and the events of the past week have kept me from doing this. Sorry for the delay, that is if there's still anyone who checks this story for updates anymore. :-p My prayers are with those who lost family members and friends in Tuesday's tragedy.