Never Blink 182 times; You might end up with human stink pigs on your hands! An
Invader Zim meets Blink 182 crossover!

Author's Note: Hey this chapter really isn't all that funny but it was nessecary to move
the story along. So you hafta read it. I honestly don't think Dib is that funny so I think
that might be why. He'll be funnier later. Trust me.

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters in this story. Although I wish I did I don't.
I also don't own the quotes from the show. Sorry!

---------------------------
Act 3: Tom and Dib
---------------------------


Narrator: Last time we met, Zim wanted a penis, Tom and GIR were running around
naked and found Dib's house, and poor Travis was paralyzed. Let's see what's going on
now.

Dib: TOM!

Tom: DIB!

Dib: TOM!

Tom: DIB!

GIR: Angry monkey!

(Tom and Dib look at GIR and continue talking)

Tom: Is that any way to greet your big brother who you haven't seen since you were a
big-headed baby?

Narrator: Yes, Tom and Dib are brothers. How? I don't quite know. I just decide to
write it that way okay? Now get off my back. (somebody throws the shoe at the Narrator)
Hey! Who threw that shoe?! I demand and explanation. (The Narrator demands and
explanation) Hey! You! Sub-Narrator! SHUT THE FUCK UP! (…) that's better.
Anyhow…back to the story.

Dib: (sarcastically) Hello, Tom.

Tom: Hello, Dib. That's better. Now, what were you saying?

Dib: How did you GET here?

Tom: Zim brought Me, Mark, and Travis here with a trimolecule converter.

Dib: Incredible! Where are Mark and Travis?

Tom: They're back at the ship thingie with Zim.

Dib: ZIM!? Why would you leave them with Zim?

Tom: (shrugs shoulders) eh….

GIR: Where's my walnuts?

Tom: (petting his head) I dunno but I'll get you some more kay?

Dib: What's with Zim's dog?

Tom: Hey! (Shoves finger between Dib's eyes. Causing him to go cross-eyed) Don't.
EVER. Dis the dog!

Dib: Okay, okay. Come inside now1 Time is of the essence!

Tom: (confused) Why?

Dib: We must save Mark and Travis!

Tom: (even more confused) They're in danger?

Dib: (growls) Nevermind! Just come in!

(Dib grabs Tom by the arm, in the same way that Zim usually grabs GIR, and drags
him inside)

Dib: I am going to strap this recorder on your stomach…do NOT take it off! I will be
able to hear Zim through it. But if you take it off I won't. Do you understand?

Tom: (Looks at Dib, then averts his glance to GIR, shrugs, and looks back over to
Dib) yes…

Dib: How is it that the smarter of the two of us is born 2nd!? I don't get it! Why couldn't
I be born first!? Why couldn't I be a normal person? WHY DID I GET THE BIG HEAD
AND TINY MISPROPORTIONATE BODY!!

Tom: (Holds finger in the air as if he has some kind of ingenious point to make) But
if you were born first…then you would be me…as for the other stuff I don't really
know…but...yeah…

Dib: (stands there scratching his rather large head, quite baffled) you're right.

Tom: (sounding hopeful) Really?

Dib: (rolls eyes) Just go…(shoves Tom and GIR out the door)

Tom: (to GIR) Well, that was odd.

GIR: mhmm

Tom: Lets go back to the ship and see what Mark, Zim, and Travis are doing. C'mere.
(GIR jumps onto Tom's shoulders)

GIR: Weeehooo! Weeehooo! (Bangs head with hands)

Narrator: And so Tom frolics off into the sunset with GIR on his shoulders, who is
pounding his head with his fists and screaming at the top of his lungs that he really
doesn't have. Will Mark and Travis be okay? Will Tom remove the speaker from his
stomach? Will Zim kill Mark and Travis and reign doom upon the world? Will dear sweet
Travis' warped mind revert back to normal? I'll be the judge of that! Next time on
Never blink 182 times; you might end up with human stink pigs on your hands! An
Invader Zim meets Blink 182 Crossover!