Chapter 2

Title: A Second Chance
Author: Sarah (sfrench@eisa.net.au)
Part:2/?
Rating: G
Disclaimer: Titanic isn't mine, never was, never will be! I'm only borrowing, I promise *g*
Archive: Anyone who wants it. :-) I'll be putting it on my site and Fanfiction.net.
Fandom: Titanic
Feedback: Pretty please! :-)
Summary: A Titanic Jack-lives kind of thing. Need I say more :-)

Chapter 2

Jack's eyes slowly flickered open. The dawn was creeping over the decks, bringing with it the promise of a fresh, new day. But Jack's heart was not filled with the hope that this should bring. Instead, he felt nothing but desolation.

He stretched slowly. The bare boards that he lay on were uncomfortable, but he was reluctant to move. Last night, they had seemed as good a place as any to spend the night, and now that morning had arrived, he realised that at least the physical discomfort focused his mind, preventing his despair from becoming utterly overwhelming.

Around him, others were beginning to stir, but Jack remained locked in his private reverie. His mind constantly replayed the events of that night, searching for a new angle, continually highlighting what he should have done differently, would have done differently had fate seen fit to offer him a second chance. Jack shuddered, wondering how long this would last- the guilt, the pain, the horrible sense of hopelessness. Everything around him seemed so futile, so empty- how was he to endure a lifetime of this?

Dangerously, an unexpected sob rose in Jack's throat, and he stifled it quickly. He knew he couldn't allow himself to break down completely. The anguish and self incrimination were bad enough. Suddenly, a memory flashed through his mind; Rose, on the deck of the Titanic- "When the ship docks, I'm getting off with you." He could still feel an echo of the joy that filled his heart as she said those words, and remembered with a jolt thatit had only been four days ago. He felt as though he had been living with this pain for eternity.

It was entirely his fault, he knew that with certainty. Jack laughed humourlessly at the tragic irony his life had become. He had assured Rose that he could offer her freedom, a new life, yet what had become of that promise? And here he was, he who had preached about living life to the fullest, unable to even muster the will to climb from his makeshift bed.

The sheer stupidity of his actions that night suddenly washed over him. What had he been thinking? He ought to have insisted that Rose stay aboard that lifeboat. Her selfless refusal to leave him had touched his heart and blurred all comprehension of the danger they were facing. Even afterwards, there had been chances that he had let slip away. If he had just held her hand a little tighter as they plunged beneath the water, if he had only looked a little harder once they reached the surface. The useless wishes swirled around in Jack's head.

Slowly, wearily, he climbed out of bed. He could barely summon the energy to do so, but a lifetime of habit told him he must. Surprisingly, he found he was hungry. To Jack's confused mind, it seemed almost obscene that such mundane details of ordinary life should continue while Jack's entire sense of being had been shattered over the past few days. Jack stumbled towards the third class dining room, his head bent, lost in deep reflection.

Standing alone at the doorway to the dining room, Alice was an incongruous site. In the midst of this sea of misery, she exuded confidence and determination., the brilliantly red bodice of her gown contrasting sharply with the washed out tones of the steerage passenger's clothing.

Yet, in her heart, Alice felt herself contaminated with the same sense of despair. She desperately longed to help Miss Rose, having seen first hand the haunted look in her patient's eyes. Yet she knew that this search, like so many others that had taken place on these decks, was destined to end in heartbreak.

Taking a minute to collect her courage, Alice walked boldly down the stairs. She was greeted warmly, for she had cared for many of these passengers. Yet her enquires about a Jack Dawson were met with nothing but blank faces.

Sighing heavily, she was about to give up, preparing yet again to deliver sad news to a patient who had hoped against all reason. Suddenly, she noticed a young man standing alone in the corner of the room. His shaggy blond hair fell in his eyes which bore the same anguished expression as Miss Rose's had.

Alice's generous heart ached for him, and for whatever terrible sadness he must be enduring. She hated to interrupt what were clearly private thoughts, but her loyalty lay with Rose.

She approached him, cautiously. "Excuse me, Sir" she began, hesitantly. His head snapped up in shock; he had been so lost in is despair that he had not heard her approach. "Please," he said, his voice cracking "Whatever it is, just leave me alone right now."

"Please, Sir" Alice tried again. "I'm looking for a passenger aboard this ship.." Jack's face hardened. "Well, I'm afraid I shall be of no use then" he replied with an angry flash in his eyes. "I am travelling alone."