I do not own Zelda!
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After the night before the couple also decided to move their room to another location of the house, they decided on one across from a storage room upstairs. When moving they found two spying cameras, one overlooking the bed and the other in the bathroom. Enraged by the spying Link could not control himself and hunted Ingo down screaming, "INGO YOU SICK FUCKING PEEPING DICK HEAD I AM GOING TO FUCKING KILL YOU!" Once Link caught Ingo, Talon tried to talk Link out of killing him so Link decided to beat the crap out him till the point where he was bleeding then ripped of his clothes and hung him on the tree out side Lon Lon Ranch. He then put a bat at the bottom of the tree and put a sign pointing to Ingo that read: "PiƱata stuffed with money! Good Luck!"
It took Ingo a week of beatings to gnaw through the ropes. Since then he has been avoiding Link completely. Besides dealing with Ingo, Link and Malon were busying themselves with chores and cleaning.
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The couple decided they wanted to redecorate, even though they somewhat appreciated Ingo's efforts to decorate, they just could not enjoy the playboy posters and the life size blow up sex mates around the house. So off to the Castle Market Place.
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While Link was in his old apartment cleaning out his stuff and loading it on the wagon, Malon went into the Market Place Doctor which had just opened recently. She came out a little while after and told Link she was going to do some separate shopping. "What do you mean separate shopping, Like What?" Link asked "Oh, just groceries and what-not!" she replied quickly. Link agreed and gave Malon some extra money just in case she might need it.
First Malon bought the groceries she said she was going to buy and loaded them in the wagon which was parked next to Link's old apartment. Then she went to furniture and clothing store and bought baby carriages, cribs, bibs, diapers, clothes, and other baby accessories etc. She did not plan on telling Link just yet. She loaded it in the wagon quickly and covered it with a cloak. Then took the extra money and went and got paint, pictures, and decor for the house and clothing for Link and herself. She picked up some lunch at the Kentucky Fried Cuccoo, and awaited Links return. He soon came around the corner, his manly arms filled with furniture for the house. He quickly shoved it in to the left space in the wagon and locked up the back. They sat at a neighbors picnic table and ate. Then they were on their way home.
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Malon asked Link to take some feed she bought to her father, while Link was gone Malon quickly set up the baby supplies in storage room Ingo had painted pink to go with the naked picture of a singer called Pink. She snatched down the picture and quickly set up the furniture and the supplies, then locked the door and put the key in her pocket then ran down and started on the groceries just as Link walked in with more furniture.
Once the couple had sorted and gotten their new belongings in order they decided it was time to give the horses some exercise.
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Out on the field the horses were running with glee. The happiness had spread to the couple and they began to make out right in the middle of the field.
As they lifted their heads for air they suddenly noticed they were surrounded by those same Link-aholics.
"Well, well, well," Ruto spoke first, "Look at the newly wed couple, well don't think he loves you girl! Isn't that right Linkypoo there is a thing called divorce, Yes there is, Oh yes, oh yes, oh yes there is, ya, uhuh, abbboobobobo bo abbb........" "Shut the fuck up Ruto, I don't love any of you, I love Malon, and stop talking to me like I am a baby!"
"It's ok Link you don't have to deny it we...." Zelda started but was suddenly interrupted by Malon in a rather demonic tone and with a pitchfork now raised in hand, "LISTEN YOU LITTLE SLUTS, GET THE FUCK OFF OF MY LAND AND AWAY FROM MY MAN, DO YOU HEAR ME HE'S MINE!!!!!!!!!!! I TELL YOU HE IS MINE!!!!!!!!" there was a sudden bustle of mumbling, "Well he is a married man and all, and I shouldn't go outerspieces so I guess I'll just leave now." Ruto mumbled and was gone in a blue light, "Well, I guess its back to Mido, Oh well!" Saria mumbled as she scooted away on a leaf. "Well he was to small for me anyway I would have probably crushed him and he probably couldn't satisfy me that well anyway!" Impa said and then disappeared in a cloud of smoke as she yelled "POOKIEBEAR IS BACK AGAIN!!!" "Well now what am I supposed to do? I have over 100 Gerdus waiting to be pleasured. Well you know what they say, if you want something done right you gotta do it yourself!" Nabarou said as she jumped on a horse and rode off. Zelda just stood there and then started to talk, "No I will not leave, You Link are the hero of time and I am a Princess, you are supposed to be with me not some peasant farm trash!" As Link was about to say something Malon interfered "HEY PRINCESS DO YOU SEE THIS BOOT!?" Malon asked "Yes, the same as every other peasant boot!" Zelda answered "NO, NOT THE SAME AS EVERY OTHER PEASANT BOOT, OH NO, YOU SEE, THIS BOOT HAS THE POWER TO TAKE ITSELF UP YOUR PRISSY LITTLE ASS IF YOU DON'T GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE, NOW!!!!!!!!!!" Malon boomed "Ok, Ok, no need to get violent now!" and Zelda left with a flash of light.
Malon turned into Link's arms. "Think its over?" he asked her "I don't know." she answered. Then they shared a long passionate kiss. When there lips broke Malon spoke "Link, I have something I need to tell you.
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FIN
Thank you for your reviews and I hope you enjoyed my first fanfiction ever!
If you want to hear about Link and Malon's baby, look for my next story, it will be called "After Shock" and will be coming soon!
