Title: Tears (2/2): Story 4 in the Wherever You Will Go series
Author(s): Demelza and X_tremeroswellian
Emails: demelza81@yahoo.co.nz and X_tremeroswellian@yahoo.com
Disclaimer: They are not ours. Don't sue. The songs
Let Me Fall by Josh Groban and Cry a
River by Amy Grant are also not ours, we just borrowed the
lyrics.
Rating: PG
Spoilers: Up through and including The Unforgiven.
Summary: Bosco and Faith reflect on the events of the past two
days.
Author's Note: This is the fourth story in a series of Third
Watch fics we're writing titled "Wherever You Will Go."
The first one is "Confessions," the second is
Here With Me and the third is You
may want to read that one first before continuing. We are working
on developing an archive for these fics to make them more
accessible for everyone.
Tears (Part Two)
Faith stared out the living room window at the rainfall. Fred had gone to bed hours ago without saying another word to her after their fight earlier.
She let go of the curtain, letting it fall back into place as her gaze drifted across the room to the framed pictures on the mantle.
She walked over and studied each one in turn: one of Fred and her on their wedding day, one of her and Fred with the kids two Christmases ago, one of Emily and Charlie dressed up on Easter Sunday. And the last one.
Faith reached over and picked up the framed, gazing down at the picture of Bosco with Emily and Charlie. She'd snapped the shot just a few months ago when he'd come over for Emily's thirteenth birthday party.
Who knew love would come walking through my door
Turn the light on somewhere down inside
Give me a feeling I've never had before
It was a long wait--it was just the wrong time
"Why do you do that?"
"Why do I do what?"
"Stop talking about something when you know it needs to be
sorted!"
She closed her eyes as she recalled the anger in his voice.
"Bosco, I'm not what you want."
"How do you know what I want?"
"Why me, Bosco? Out of everyone you could have picked to
fall for....why me?"
"Why not you?"
Faith shook her head. "If you only knew..." she whispered, tears filling her eyes.
I hope you'll hold me now...somewhere within
And when you think of what might've been
Cry a river
Flood the sea
Cry a river over me
"I'm sorry, Boz."
"So this afternoon..."
"If things were different...if it was just me I had to think
about..."
Take the bitter with the sweet
And cry a river over me
"I'd love to take Crystal to Hawaii. Not that we'd see much of the island."
She felt her stomach turn, then she felt angry with herself. What right did she have to be upset with him? They weren't together. She was married to Fred. She had chosen to stay with her husband. Did she expect that he would wait on her to change her mind? That wasn't right. And it wasn't a fair expectation to put on Bosco. He didn't deserve to be alone.
"It would never work, Bosco."
"Yes, it would."
"No, it wouldn't...because I'm not the person you think I
am."
"You say that, but I know that's not true!"
Faith swallowed hard, remembering the look on his face, the hurt in his eyes.
"Me and you what, Faith?"
"It just wasn't meant to be."
And how do you argue
With the feeling in your bones
About what is and what isn't meant to be
"You're mistaking happiness for security, Bosco.
There's a big difference."
"No, I think you are, staying with Fred. That's what you see
when you go upstairs every night after work, that you forget
what's really important. Being happy. And if you say you're happy
with him, then you're a liar!"
"Don't judge me, Bosco. You don't know where I've
been."
Some things you live with
And you never let it show
"You really don't want to know, Bosco...trust
me."
"Yes, I do. Tell me, Faith...tell me what was so bad about
your past."
Faith opened her eyes, a teardrop splashing down onto the glass covering Bosco's picture. "You don't know how much I wish I could." She took a deep breath and swallowed hard.
If only she hadn't decided to go into that chat room two nights ago. If only she and Bosco hadn't gotten trapped on that elevator. Then things would have been normal. She could have kept it all hidden. Bosco probably never would have said those things to her. It was just the circumstances they were under...
He doesn't really love me, she thought, shaking her head slowly. He just thinks he does.
Another teardrop fell down on the picture and she squeezed her eyes shut once more. She wondered what would have happened if she had met Bosco first.
It doesn't matter, Faith thought, berating herself. It didn't happen that way. Just get over it.
Bosco thought she needed to be saved from Fred, but that wasn't the truth.
She needed to be saved from herself.
I hope you'll think of me
When tender winds blow
Sit on the shores of love
And just let it go
Faith opened her eyes and drew in another deep breath. With shaking hands, she set the picture back up on the mantle and turned away. She sat down on the sofa, her mind flashing back to the night Bosco had shown up on her doorstep, looking more weary than she'd ever seen him. He had bared his soul to her that night. Had cried in her arms.
And even then, even then--she couldn't help thinking that it felt right for her to be the one he turned to for comfort, for reassurance. It had felt right.
But it wasn't.
With resolve, Faith leaned back against the couch, allowing her tears to fall without bothering to wipe them away.
She had made her choice.
Now she had to live with it.
Cry a river
Flood the sea
Cry a river over me
Take the bitter with the sweet
And cry a river over me
-End-
What happens when two unarmed police officers are taken hostage in a bank robbery gone awry? Find out in Wherever You Will Go fic #5: Fear
