Karen was in the middle of a dreamless sleep. She was tossing and turning. Something wasn't right, Jessie kept coming into her mind. Nothing could erase the look Jessie had on her face. She looked almost...desperate. It was like she was looking for something, trying to cling on to the last bit of sanity she had left. Suddenly, Karen heard a crash coming from the bathroom. She slowly got up to see what had caused it, not knowing what caused it.

Coming to the bathroom, she noticed a small amount of light coming from under the door, so Karen knew she was in there. She cautiously knocked on the door. "Jessie," she said softly. "Are you okay?" There was a faint metallic odor in the air. It was familiar, but Karen couldn't quite place it. Oh. My. God. She'd figured it out. "Jessie!" She yelled, throwing the door wide open. Karen covered her mouth with her hand, holding the door for balance. "Oh God," her body was wracking with sobs. Her baby girl was sprawled across the bathroom floor in a puddle of her own blood.

She got the phone from downstairs and returned to her daughter's side. "Hello," she cried into the phone after dialing 9-1-1.

"Hello. You have reached the emergency operating system. Please hold," Karen looked at the phone with contempt and hung up. She looked down at her daughter with panic. Karen got her keys. She grabbed a towel and wrapped her daughter's arms in it. Then, Karen reached down and picked Jessie up and carried her downstairs, they were going to the hospital.

"Honey, you're so light," Karen said to herself. It dawned on her as to why. You haven't eaten. She looked down at Jessie, when she sat her it the car. Jessie's body was completely limp. All she could do was hope Jessie was still alive, she didn't check for a pulse. Karen hauled ass toward the Emergency Room. She was crying hysterically. Who wouldn't?

Upon pulling up, Karen picked Jessie up and carried her inside. "Help!" She screamed. Two nurses and a doctor came running before Karen had even said a thing. They had seen the blood-stained towel, they already knew.

A nurse came in with a gurney and Jessie was promptly laid down on it. They rolled her away and a nurse stayed to talk with Karen. "I know this must be hard for you, but I need to ask you a few questions, okay?" She asked comfortingly, resting a hand on Karen's shoulder. Karen just nodded. "How long ago did you find her?"

"Ten minutes ago I think. Everything happened so fast. I can't be sure," she mumbled in a daze. "Is she going to be alright?" She asked turning suddenly.

"I think she was far from alright before this happened ma'am," she said gently.

"Is she going to live?" Karen asked pleadingly. She just wanted good news, even if the nurse had to lie.

"It's hard to say. It looks like she had lost a lot of blood. Is there someone you want to call?" She asked, in case the woman needed someone there, for a shoulder to cry on if nothing else. Karen nodded. "Can I get your daughter's name first?"

"Jessie," Karen said lovingly, with tears in her eyes. She got up to call Rick.

"Hello?" Rick asked while picking up the phone. Who would call at 3:00 in the morning?

"Rick," Karen cried into the receiver. She caught him off guard, she knew that.

"Karen? What is it? What's wrong?" He asked, panicked. Upon hearing this, the rest of the family came down, worried by his tone.

"What is it Dad?" Eli asked, Rick waved his hand to silence him.

"What is it?" He asked again, growing more anxious with every second of silence. She was sobbing from the other end.

Karen choked it down long enough to answer. "It's Jessie. She...she..." Karen broke off into another fit of sobs.

"She what? Karen, what happened?" Rick was furious and frightened, he was terrified of knowing the answer. His reactions caused the others to fret even more.

"You need to come to the hospital now!" Karen shouted. "Jessie tried to kill herself!"

"What?!" Rick dropped the phone and leaned against the counter for leverage. He picked the phone back up. "I'll be right there," he said, dazed.

"Rick, what's wrong?" Lily asked, touching his arm.

"Jessie," was all he said. He fell back in a seat.

"What about her?" Eli said, suddenly angry and very worried. "What happened?" They all stared at him, waiting for an answer.

Rick stood up. "We need to go to the hospital." With that he left, the others grabbed their coats and followed. He didn't offer anymore information, but they knew whatever happened was not good. They all went, even Zoe.

"Oh, God! Rick," Karen yelled as she ran up to him. She wrapped her arms around him and started crying, he did the same. They were oblivious to the confused expressions the others held. Karen looked up and saw them all standing there. "Did you tell them?" She asked, not upset, just curious.

"No, I...couldn't. I just told them we needed to go to the hospital."

"What the hell happened?" Grace shouted, frustrated at being in the dark about whatever the crisis was.

"Jessie tried to kill herself," Karen said in a low tone. It hit the others like a shockwave. They all acted as if they were dealt a physical blow. Slowly, they all found a seat. Zoe was shaken and she buried her head in Lily's armpit and started crying. Eli buried his head in his hands. Grace just started to cry. Nobody expected this. Sure, they knew Jessie was depressed, but they never expected it to go this far.

"How did she do it?" Lily asked. She immediately kicked herself. Stupid question.

"She cut herself," Karen said, detached. "She hasn't been eating either, has she?" For the first time, Karen looked up. She saw them shake their heads. "She relapsed. Jessie only weighed 83 pounds when I brought her in," she choked down a sob. "They said it caused her blood to thin out. She lost a lot of blood. It doesn't look good," she started crying.

Everyone lapsed into a somber silence. There was nothing more they could do. They had to wait for a doctor to tell them if she would make it.

Solitude. I have always loved it. Nobody to bother me. I don't have to be anything. I don't have expectations to live up to. I can just...be.

There's this song I once heard. It's by Gilbert O'Sullivan, from 1972. The song is "Alone Again(Naturally)". I can't remember the whole thing, just pieces of it.

"In a little while from now/ If I'm not feeling any less sad/ I promised myself/ To treat myself and visit a nearby town/ In climbing to the top/ Will throw myself off/ In an effort to/ Make clear to who/ Ever wondered what it's like when your shattered..."

I actually never understood those words until just recently. It's sad I think. It's pretty much how I feel right now. The only thing I've felt is guilt and anger and regret. I wanted to feel something. Something other than that. And I did. It was a release, not a good one, but a release nonetheless.

"To think that only yesterday/ I was cheerful, bright and gay...But as if to knock me down/ Reality came around/ Without so much/ As a mere touch/ Cut me into little pieces/ Leaving me to doubt/ Talk about/ God and his mercy/ For if he really does exist/ Why did he desert me?/ In my hour of need/ I truly am indeed/ Alone again(naturally)..."

Like I said, it's sad. I can't remember the last time I was happy, the last time I felt free. They're better off without me. I just caused grief and pain. They all deny it, but it's true. Actually, that's not true. Katie, I never hurt her. She never hurt me.

What I did was a last resort. Stuff just kept piling up. Doing what I did was not the smartest thing to do, but it made everything just...stop. All the pain, all the fights, all the guilt. That one is the worst.

When things go wrong, life moves in slow motion, like in movies. That's what it felt like. I fell over and everything went black.

"Are you the Sammlers?" An elderly doctor asked, pulling the others out of their thoughts.

"More or less," Karen answered.

"I came to tell you about your daughter." He now had their undivided attention. Everyone was tense, not knowing if they wanted to hear what he was about to say.

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To Be Continued

What will happen with Jessie? Did she get her wish for solitude? Or will she be given a second chance?