They did find him, a pile of rubble, crashed, blinded by debris and litter from the storm.
Now he cursed himself, for having such exaggerated notions of love. He was nothing to her, he realized later. Just a good fuck, she couldn't part with. Just a reason to get away from her abusive alcoholic husband and menacing father-in-law.
He remembered her face, her tears. They were real, as they watched together as Philip was pulled out of his car. Not sleeping, not resting, dead.
He was dead and he would never forget the words Chloe had said to him. Words that haunted him to this day.
Now he knew even then he couldn't live near her. If he saw her on the street, even then he would want her. Even though a man had died because he wanted her so bad, he didn't care, and that was the main reason he left.
At one point he thought it was love. But how could someone love him, when he let her betray her husband and the very vows that bound them together.
If only he has resisted her, been able to stop himself from touching her, but that was impossible. Her scent, was like a field of orchids that he could drown in. The purely intoxicating way she smelled was enough to make him a man of uncontrollable desires.
But that day in the rain, his head was clear, his heart ached and yet he still could smell her over the wet drops that covered them.
*************************************
"This is your fault! I hate you! I NEVER want to see you again!"
Brady stood there and took it. He heard her words, felt her fists pound heavily on his chest and heard her cries. She was right, it was his fault. He wanted nothing and no one to have her and especially not Philip. He hated himself, because a part of him, deep inside was glad Philip was dead. Apart of him, wished it had been sooner. He knew then, that he had to leave. He had caused too much trouble already. But he took her in his arms for what he knew was to be the last time, and rocked her until her sobs stopped and she could stand on her own. He left the next day. He couldn't talk to her, not when he knew he would only hurt her more. He would never be able to hide the fact that he hated Philip, for everything he had and took for granted.
***************************************
And so he stood, on top of a tall building, gun pointed to his skull and her words still fresh in his mind as if it was yesterday and not a year ago. Why he came back, he didn't know. But it had everything to do with her.
Maybe he needed to see her one last time, maybe he wanted to punish himself some more before he left this earth, he couldn't say.
The night was cloudy and raining hard with thunder and hard gust of winds as it had been that night. He teetered, unsteady on his feet as a bolt of electricity lit the sky. Under the cool sheets of Chloe's fancy bed, in the guess room, it was bliss, so long ago. He could never bring himself to actually go into the room Philip and Chloe shared as a couple. He knew if he did, he could never take her, touch her, taste her like he needed to. He was desperate when he was with her, needing her so bad, it hurt deep within his chest. And he knew somehow she had needed him too. Or that had been what he thought, until she uttered those words that broke him.
He became like a dog when he left; aggressive, disobedient, vicious. He wanted no one to know him.
He didn't deserve affection or human touch, even though he craved it. He escaped with drugs and booze, but he could never forget, that horrified look on his beloved diva's face when they pulled her dead husband from the wreckage. There was no forgiveness in her eyes.
Now, high above the rooftops of Salem's finest, he watched the swirling lights and sirens below. He was a fool. A fucking fool. Even now, he still loved her.
The scratching of dirt under heels summoned him out of his thoughts, he knew those steps all too well and he turned to meet her teary face. The face that haunted his dreams and crushed his future stared at him, a little unsure of herself.
An umbrella in hand, she made her way to the liquored Brady.
"I heard you were back." Chloe tried, shakily.
"Not for long." He told her harshly, examining her with his eyes.
"Where did you go?" She asked above the hard slapping of the rain on the wet rooftop.
"Everywhere." Brady said, his tone returning to normal, as he watched the fear flicker in her eyes. She did not posses the movements, mannerisms of someone who hated him. "I'm sorry." He whispered, almost unable to get out the words.
"Sorry? Sorry for what?"
"I couldn't stop. I tried Chloe. I tried so hard, but no matter where I went, how far away I was, I couldn't stop loving you. I know that's not what you want to hear, I know I destroyed your life but
I won't anymore."
"Please Brady. Please...don't do this. I never wanted this. I was angry, confused, I lashed out and you were there to take it. I never meant those things. Never in my life could I hate you. Please Brady....please." Chloe whispered, the tears already streaking her face as she inched toward him, taking the gun from his trembling hands.
"I never loved him." She told him softly, as she helped him off the ledge.
TBC
