Strangled
The eighth poem in the "Kibito's Thoughts" series
by Rivka Aes Sedai of the Green Ajah
A/N: Loads of angst ahead. Like mush? Go back a few poems. –Rivka
I wanted to strangle myself for you,
Let the life-force out of me, slowly,
Let it seep into you, deeply,
Let it mingle with your very soul.
Now I am dead, through no fault of my own,
And I await your arrival here, in the palace of a lesser god,
For I see you breaking, disintegrating, strangling yourself,
Although struggling to exist.
I hear your voice cry out plaintively…
It is not my name. It angers me. I know not why.
Maybe it is because I have loved you for eons
And yet you forget. Did it happen upon you
That I can hear in death??
I would like to know why Gohan?
Do you love him? Do you cling to him
Like a drowning sailor to a rock?
I want to strangle you, but I can't.
Even if I were alive
Killing you would mean killing me,
The most important part of myself.
Can you imagine me wasting away like that, Kaiooshin-sama?
I know you cannot hear me
But I pray that you hold me in your heart just the same.
Be strong.
-Rivka
