Title: Harry Potter and the Search for the
Meaning of Life at Hogwarts, or The Hogwarts School Band
Chapter:
Eight: Birthday Surprises
Rating: M
for mature content, and adult conversations
Original
Character: Alastor Daker
Reason for Edit:
Noticed that the formatting had been screwed up, so decided to
re-submit with correct editing. Plus I wanted to change a few of the
things, as it was bit odd in places.
Notes:
Please note that this was written waaay before 'Order of the Phoenix'
so, the OWL grades and subjects for NEWTs don't tally with the canon.
Best read this as an alternative 'book 7'. Also, check out my prequel
'The Gospel, according to Gilderoy Lockhart or The Hogwarts
Gazette'. (Additional note for this chapter: From reading on the HP
Lexicon recently, apparently Snape's birthday is 9th Jan, which
obviously doesn't tally with my chapter!)
Eight: Birthday Surprises
Ron Weasley sat at the Gryffindor table on the morning of the 8th of September. It was Hermione Granger's birthday and his present was quietly sitting under his seat. Choosing a gift for his best female friend had proved to be something of a task - Ron had wanted to choose something unique and special and well, that had been hard. Over the years Ron had developed something of a talent for detective work, and it hadn't taken him long to discover whom Hermione's favourite muggle writer was, and which of their books she had. Her parents had been more than helpful in that. Ron did feel a little guilty over having to borrow some money from Professor McGonagall in order to be able to afford the book, but she had said it was for a good cause and had even offered to help keep things secret.
The Gryffindor's had even organised a surprise party for her; the House Elves had been particularly helpful along with the faculty who had volunteered to keep Hermione busy during the hours they were going to prepare the Common Room. The task had mainly fallen upon Professor Snape who was well known for being able to keep people occupied for great lengths of time.
"How's everything going?" Neville asked as he sat down and hid his brightly wrapped present under his seat.
"Fine so far, Lavender is keeping Hermione busy in the girls dormitory - something to do with makeup or something along those lines - so we should all be able to get to the table without Hermione seeing us with parcels." Ron replied.
"Great." Neville leaned over for the coffee pot. "What did you get her?"
"I had a conversation with Hermione about muggle writers, and she told me her favourite writer was someone called Victor Hugo. I wrote to her mum and told her the plan and asked which ones of his books she had, and if she could provide me with a list of other books available. I was able to find a really nice copy of one his books - called 'Ninety-three' - hopefully Hermione will love it."
"Great! I got her a chess set I saw in a placed called Clitheroe during the holidays. It's got hand-carved wizards and witches as the pieces and they are fantastic."
Ron could tell that this was going to be one of the best birthdays Hermione had, had in a long time. Usually her birthday was forgotten by most people, as it happened so early into the new school year, this year though, no one was going to forget. It was Hermione's eighteenth and she deserved to have a birthday to remember.
The Gryffindors, Slytherin's and the staff all seemed to be conspiring today. As each of the older Gryffindors arrived they gathered round in small groups discussing the plans for the day. The Slytherin's too were gathered round Professor Daker taking in whispers and casting glances over their shoulders, and even the staff was huddled in together talking. Perhaps there was something going on, or it was just the Slytherin's debating what the Gryffindors were up to and the staff debating whether or not this conspirator air needed to be sorted out before something dangerous happened.
"What are we going to do about Severus' birthday? We can't just go down to the Three Broomsticks, something special needs to be done." Professor Sprout was saying.
"I fear if we do anything too special, Severus might just kill us." Dumbledore said in a mock-serious tone.
"Aye, Severus doesn't really go in for big parties when it comes to his birthday. I think we should leave the big celebrations for his fortieth." McGonagall suggested.
"His fortieth? I don't want to wait another year for a big party!" Professor Flitwick whined he liked parties.
"What I propose is that some of you take him down to the Three Broomsticks for a drink. Anything else and he won't be too happy." Dumbledore seemed to understand his staff, better than most people; especially Severus Snape!
"And book him and Alastor a room over night so they can do what most couples do on someone's birthday!" Sprout grinned.
They laughed, "I don't quite think Severus will thank us for that." McGonagall said with a somewhat wicked smile.
"He might, everyone needs a bit of relief from time to time." A few people stared at Dumbledore. Next to Professors Sprout and Flitwick, Dumbledore came in third in the 'most perverted Olympics'.
"I think someone better find out what the Slytherin's have in mind. We don't want to clash."
----
"Lavender, I'm not really interested in makeup!" Hermione moaned, after Lavender Brown started showing Hermione the different shades of nail polish she had.
"Oh come on, Hermione! Sometimes you have to look your best!" Lavender said, picking up a bright pink variety of her nail polish. "Now, I think you'll look really good in this one."
"Lavender no!" Hermione pulled her hand away. "As much as I appreciate this, I am really hungry! I want my breakfast!"
"Don't you want to impress the boys?"
"I don't need to, I've got Viktor."
"Ah, but I bet he loves it when you dress up and wear makeup."
"No, he likes me just the way I am. Now please, Lavender, can we go to breakfast?"
Lavender looked at her watch. She had been told to keep Hermione busy for twenty minutes and that time was nearly up. "Oh okay. But remember, any time you need any makeup just ask, and I'll let you use it. Or, if you ever fancy a makeover, just ask!"
"I'll remember that, Lavender." Hermione grinned. She went to her beside cabinet and took out a neatly wrapped parcel.
"Who's that for?" Lavender asked, intrigued.
"Professor Snape." Lavender stared at her. "Don't look at me like that! Yes I know he can be a complete bastard most of the time, but it's his birthday and I don't think he gets many gifts from people." Still Lavender stared at her, "is it a crime to give someone a good birthday, regardless of what they are like?"
"Well…er… not really." She had to admit that Hermione was right, it wasn't a crime to let someone have a nice birthday. "So, what did you get him?"
"He's got a really battered copy of Victor Hugo's 'Les Misérables', and the book club I'm a member of was offering really nice hardback copies of classics, and 'Les Misérables' was one of them, so I thought it would be a really nice present."
"Must have cost you."
"Not really, I get a 20 discount since I'm a member. Only cost me £12.50." Hermione picked up the card she had spent ages trying to find in the mail order catalogues she had hunted though. It amazed her that cards were made for 'mile-stone' birthdays, but not really for those 'not-so-important' numbers. "Right, let's go get some breakfast!"
----
Snape sat on the couch in the Slytherin common room, listening to Draco Malfoy playing 'Fur Elise' on the piano. Draco had dragged him down to the common room in order to get him to listen to this - apparently Draco had been practising for months and was really pleased with the rendition. Snape had to admit it wasn't a bad rendition, but suffering quite a few teething problems.
"Draco, it's fantastic, but I really have to go." Snape stood to leave, but Draco leapt up from his seat and pushed him back down.
"No! You have to stay, come on, you can play piano, I need some tips."
"I can yes, but not as good as Professor Daker, you're best asking him."
"He's really good and I'm worried if I play for him, he'll feel offended at my bad playing." Draco looked solemnly at his house master. "Please?"
"I'll ask him for you, but right now I really have to get going."
"Why? We've plenty of time."
"I know, but I'm starving and dying to take a leak!"
"No, please, you have to stay and help me with this."
"Draco, my bladder is on the verge of exploding! Come on, I'll help you later, or I'll speak to Professor Daker for you, I'm sure he'd be delighted to give you some hints. It's been awhile since someone asked him for his help."
Draco could see that he was going to get nowhere with his attempts to keep Professor Snape here whilst the Slytherin's organised themselves with the presents. "Alright." He said reluctantly, hoping that he had managed to keep the professor busy long enough.
----
"Have you seen this!" Harry said in some amount of shock as he flung himself down at the breakfast table. He was brandishing the early morning copy of the Daily Prohet as though it was a sword.
"What is it?" Ron asked.
Harry opened the paper and started to read. "'Today, international and Bulgarian Quidditch star, Viktor Krum announced he was retiring from both the international world and domestic word of Quidditch. He has said in a statement that he never originally intended to make a career out of his Quidditch, and would like to return to complete his further magical education. The young Bulgarian, now twenty, made his name as the youngest seeker to play international Quidditch at the tender age of eighteen, has been playing professional Quidditch since the age of fifteen. His sudden decision to leave the sport has caused a shock reaction around the world. He has said that he intends to seek a Potions apprenticeship as would like to work in the field of Potions.' Can you believe that? Quitting playing Quidditch for some crummy Potions apprenticeship?"
"It's not that bad, Harry. If he had stayed in Quidditch he would have had to retire soon anyway, someone bigger and better is bound to come along and take over your position. And I don't see what's wrong with him wanting to do a Potions apprenticeship."
"But quitting a million gallon job to go back to unpaid education? That's insane."
"You get paid for an apprenticeship." Neville said. "You learn as you work. I'm hoping to do a Herbology apprenticeship here at Hogwarts, I'd sort of like to teach the subject." He turned slightly pink.
"That's just sad." Harry retorted. He couldn't see why anyone would want to continue their learning! Seven years of compulsory magical education was enough for anyone, to want to continue learning, then there had to be something wrong with you.
"It's my choice, Harry." Neville said hotly, "and I didn't ask for your approval." He got up and moved as far away from Harry that he could on the crowded Gryffindor table.
----
"Professor Snape!"
Snape looked up and saw Hermione Granger leaning over the barrier about him. He waved at her to show that he acknowledged her and waited whilst she raced down the stairs. "Thanks." She breathed as he met her at the bottom of the stairs.
"Not at all. You wanted something?" He replied.
"Yeah," Hermione caught her breath. "Happy birthday." She said handing him the card and parcel.
Snape looked at her and at the present and card. He smiled warmly at her and nodded his appreciation, "thank you very much." He said taking the gifts. "I shall open them later. I have something for you as well, Ms Granger." He put his hand in his pocket and brought out a small velvet box.
Hermione took it from him, curious to see what it was. "Mind if I open it now?"
"Not at all."
She opened the box, and saw something that made her beam slightly. It was a small dragon charm. Hermione had a charm necklace, something that she had always kept well hidden fearing that people might laugh at her. "Oh! It's beautiful! Thank you!" She gave Snape a hug, which surprised him slightly. "How did you know I collected charms?"
Snape flustered slightly, "I didn't. I asked your mother."
Hermione laughed, "you wrote to my mother? What did you say!"
"I said that I was your potions teacher, and that I was very impressed and pleased with your work. I also mentioned that we shared the same birthday and that I would like to get you something as a thank you for being a good student and for putting up with my rude comments. She wrote back and said that she was very pleased that I thought highly of you, and she also thought it was very gentlemanly of me to want to get you a birthday gift as way of an apology. She said you collected charms and also mentioned you had something of a dragon fascination."
Hermione grinned, "I think I'm going to have to have words with my mum about giving out information to anyone who writes to her."
"A wise decision, who knows what…ah, other personal things she might let slip."
"What else did she say!"
Snape laughed, "nothing else. I'm just teasing. Thank you very much for the gift, I promise I will open it later."
"Why not now?"
"Tradition, I always open my presents on the hour I was born." Snape seemed a little embarrassed by this. "It's something that my entire family has always done, and despite my dislike for the majority of them, I don't like breaking tradition."
"Does the card come under that?"
"No." He smiled, "I take it you want to see my reaction?" Hermione nodded. "Fair enough." Snape opened the card, and immediately laughed, "and who told you I was going to be thirty-nine?"
She grinned, "no one."
He eyed her suspiciously, "um, how much did you pay Alastor to tell me?"
"Didn't cost money, I just promised him I'd help him with something."
"Really?" Then it clicked, "you've not been asked to keep me occupied whilst the staff organise something, have you?"
Hermione grinned, "oh no."
"Why do I not believe you?"
----
Dumbledore sat down after addressing the entire school; all the plans were put into place regarding Hermione Granger's and Professor Snape's birthday. Normally, Dumbledore would never single out people's birthday's but this year he had decided people needed all the moral boosting that was possible. Anyone, who wanted their friends birthday acknowledging on the morning of their birthday by the whole school, only needed to tell their head of house and they would organise everything. Although in this instance, the Slytherin's had gone to Professor McGonagall about Snape's birthday, and they had planned the whole event with Professor Daker.
Draco Malfoy entered the Great Hall and signalled that Snape and Hermione were on their way. Hermione had been asked by Professor Daker to keep Snape occupied for a couple of minutes whilst they got everything ready. Draco had, had the job of keeping Snape occupied whilst the Slytherin's got everything into place. Snape had been asked by Professor McGonagall to keep Hermione occupied for a couple of minutes, again whilst everything was finalised. Neither knew each of their parts to play in the entire conspiracy.
"Everyone get ready." Dumbledore said.
A couple of moments later, Snape and Hermione entered the Hall and instantly everyone started to sing 'Happy Birthday' to the both of them.
Snape and Hermione both looked completely flabbergasted. Neither had been expecting this! After the song was finished everyone cheered.
"Thank you… I er… think." Snape said before going to take his place at the staff table. A few people laughed. Hermione had turned very red at the experience and shuffled off to her house table glowing in both embarrassment and happiness.
"Thanks guys." She said with a gin, and gave Neville a gentle kiss on the cheek. He blushed and almost fell out of his seat.
"Happy birthday, Hermione." Ron said with a grin, handing her, her present. "Hope you like it."
Hermione sat down and ripped off the paper. She found a beautiful paperback copy of one of the books she had been looking for ages! "Oh Ron! It's beautiful, thank you." She gave him a kiss on the cheek and a hug.
"Here, Hermione, I hope you like it." Neville handed her the large present.
"Ooh, I wonder what this is!" She eagerly unwrapped it; she gazed at the beautiful chess set. "Oh, Neville!" She gasped, before giving him another kiss.
Neville blushed and muttered a muffled 'your welcome'. It wasn't long before Hermione had a little pile of presents from her closer friends, several cards from other people in the house and quite a large amount of book tokens from other people - including the staff (signed by all, including Professor Snape.)
A couple of moments later, just as Hermione was finally tucking into her breakfast, the owl post arrived. One quite large eagle owl dropped a present and a card into her lap. The present was obviously a book, but she opened the card first.
'Many happy returns, Hermione. Sorry we can't be there for your big day. Lots of love, Remus Lupin and Snuffles.'
"That's really sweet." Ron said looking at the card they had sent. The image on the front was of a snowy owl holding a card with a big number eighteen on, the owl kept changing position.
"Yeah." Hermione said with a smile. She opened the present and laughed, she showed Ron and Neville the front cover of the book.
"'The Young Witches Guide to Life - What every Witch needs to know about Life.' My mum got Fred and George a copy of 'The Young Wizards Guide to Life' for their eighteenth. I read a few pages and it was quite funny."
Hermione laughed and opened the last card. It was from Viktor. "Aw, isn't this sweet of him?" She showed Ron the inside of the card.
"'I'm sorry I can't be here on your birthday, but I promise that when it's your next Hogsmede weekend we'll meet up in the Three Broomsticks. I miss you, happy birthday.' Is Viktor a big softy at heart then?" Ron grinned.
"Oh shut up." Hermione hit him playfully on the arm.
Harry looked up from the paper, "er… sorry Hermione, I didn't have time to get you anything, but I promise on our next Hogsmede weekend, I'll get you a present then."
"It doesn't matter, Harry." Hermione said, "birthdays aren't about presents, they're about being with your friends." She gave him a friendly smile.
"Hermione."
They looked up to see Draco Malfoy standing behind Harry. "Get lost, Malfoy!" Harry spat, "just you to try and ruin her day!"
"No need to get shirty, Potter, I just came over to give Hermione this. I notice you didn't get her anything." Draco handed Hermione a card and then walked off out of the Great Hall but either Harry, Ron or Hermione could say anything.
"Thanks Harry." Hermione muttered, opening the card. It was a very nice card with a glittery number eighteen on the front. It looked like it had been hand-made, either Draco had bought her the card or he had made it himself, she couldn't really tell.
"Well he had no right coming over here!"
"He only wanted to give me a card! Nothing wrong with that!"
"He's a Slytherin, Hermione. The enemy."
"I've had a card and present from Professor Snape as well, are you going to call him the enemy?" Hermione looked at him harshly.
"Did you know anything about Krum leaving Quidditch?" Harry said, suddenly changing the subject.
"As a matter of fact, I did. He wrote to me ages ago saying he was thinking about leaving and waned to know if I thought it was the right decision."
"And you let him leave!"
"So? It's none of your business!" Hermione got up, "and if you don't mind, I think I'll take my presents up to my room." She gathered up her cards and gifts and headed out of the Great Hall.
----
"Ms Granger!" Hermione turned to see Professor Daker heading towards her.
"Hi, sir." She said, just to clarify where she was standing.
"Just wanted to thank you for keeping Severus occupied."
"No problem. Did you ask him to keep me occupied?"
Daker laughed, "well, no, that was Professor McGonagall's idea. Sorry."
"Don't have to be sorry. Good way of keeping us both out of the way." She smiled at him.
"I er, also wanted to ask you something. Some of the staff are going down to the Three Broomsticks tonight, treat for Severus you understand, and we were all wondering if you and a friend would care to join us?"
"I would yes, thanks, sir."
"Don't thank me, you deserve it, and I'm sorry I didn't get you anything. It's a little hard to pick out cards and gifts."
"It understand, it's okay though."
"I'm glad you think so, I was getting a bit worried when I saw that almost everyone had got you something. Felt a bit guilty that all I'd done was sign a card, well book token. I think you deserve it, for well, not saying anything."
"Nothing could make me say anything." She smiled, "I think it's sweet."
Daker laughed, "that is a change from what some people have called us. Thank you once again, you and a friend meet us all in the entrance hall at around six o'clock."
"Six o'clock, great."
----
"Can you believe Hermione didn't try and persuade her boyfriend into staying with Quidditch? He had a whole future in Quidditch ahead of him! He could have been one of the greatest players of all time!" Harry was still in a mood.
"Like she said, Harry, it was his decision to leave." Ron replied, looking up from the crossword he was going. "Look at it this way, if Bulgaria have lost one of their best players then England have a chance against them in next year's World Cup."
"That's not the point! The point is that Hermione probably talking Krum into leaving Quidditch. Women are dangerous when it comes to Quidditch, they interfere too much."
Ron decided not to reply.
"Ron," Hermione leaned over his chair, making him jump slightly, "can I have a quick word?"
"Sure." Ron got up and followed Hermione to a corner.
"Daker asked if me and a friend wanted to go with the staff to the Three Broomsticks tonight, and I was wondering if you wanted to come?"
"Thanks for the offer, Herm, but I don't really fancy an evening surrounded by teachers. Sorry." Ron replied honestly.
"That's okay, Ron, I thought you might not be interested but I was just wanted to make sure."
"No prob." Ron smiled, and went back to his seat.
----
At six o'clock that evening, Hermione and her chosen friend headed down to the entrance Hall. Neville was a little bit nervous about the whole experience but he was looking forward to spending a little time out of the school.
All of the staff we wearing casual clothes instead of there usual suits that proclaimed their status within the school environment. Hermione was quite glad she had decided to wear her jeans and her green sweater!
Minerva McGonagall, Alastor Daker, Severus Snape and Albus Dumbledore were all awaiting Hermione and Neville. "Hello, Neville." Professor McGonagall said with a grin, Neville once again blushed slightly but said hello back.
"Right, we're all here! Off we go." Dumbledore seemed in a very jolly mood, and it wasn't long before they were headed down to Hogsmede, laughing for most of the journey. Even Professor Snape had a grin on his face by the time they reached the Three Broomsticks.
Hermione and Neville walked side by side talking, she was curious as to whether she should tell Neville about Snape and Daker - the only problem was that Neville was known to tell people things when he was nervous, but perhaps he could be made to promise to keep quiet.
"Good evening, Madame Rosmerta!" Dumbledore said jovially as they entered the pub. "What will it be, everyone, my treat."
"I'll have a small Gillywater, if you don't mind Albus." McGonagall said.
"Pumpkin Squash, please." Snape muttered.
"Come on, Spike! You can have something alcoholic today, it's your birthday." Daker said squeezing his arm.
"I'd rather not." Snape seemed somewhat nervous about this.
"One glass of red wine won't hurt, will it." Dumbledore said watching him carefully.
Snape held up his hands, "if you insist."
Daker grinned, "I'm going to be awkward now, I'll have a cherry syrup."
"And for our guests?" Dumbledore said with a smile.
"Er… Butterbeer, please." Hermione said quickly.
"Same here." Neville added.
"Ms Granger, you are now old enough to drink alcohol, still sure you want a Butterbeer?"
"Albus, stop pressurising people into drinking alcohol!" McGonagall said in a mock-serious tone.
"I was just making sure."
"It's alright, Professor. I think I will have a glass of red wine, please." Hermione grinned.
"Very well, go on, find a table, I'll be along in a moment."
----
The adults were laughing heartily, and Hermione stared at them. "Is that true!" She gasped.
"Sadly." McGonagall managed to say.
"Oh my god." Hermione joined in the laughter.
"It's not that funny! It was embarrassing, not to mention painful!" Snape said.
"You have to admit, Severus, it's something a lot of kids will never forget. The image of Professor Severus Snape, the feared Potions master bent double and crying in agony." Dumbledore laughed.
"Should have got a photograph." Daker said, "been Daily Prophet worthy material!"
"Hey, look, being hit there by a buldger is painful business!" Snape reminded them.
"Have to give it to whoever hit the buldger, they had a good aim." Hermione said, as she laughed.
"Aye, we should have given the beater points for accuracy!" McGonagall snorted into her Gillywater.
Snape took out his cigarettes, "anyone mind?" He asked.
"Not at all, Severus." Dumbledore said as he leaned over to take one himself, "mind if I join you?"
"I didn't know you smoked." Neville spoke for almost the first time that evening.
"Unfortunately," Dumbledore said lighting one, "in my day smoking was the thing everyone did. Never quite been able to give up."
"I think it's a filthy habit." McGonagall muttered.
"Indeed, but it is one of those habits that is difficult to get over." Snape replied.
"Or one that stubborn people refuse to give up." Daker added.
"You love the rebel type, admit it!" Snape grinned.
"I do, but I prefer them not to taste like an astray!" They again laughed. Neville looked somewhat baffled by this. Snape looked over at him.
"Ah, yes, I forgot you were here." He muttered, "it may be somewhat clear, but Professor Daker and myself are a little… more than friends. We'd be extremely grateful if you didn't tell anyone."
"I have to back that up, Mr Longbottom." Dumbledore said, "it would be very serious if you were to let that slip."
"I promise." Neville said timidly, "I know what it's like to keep a secret like that."
"Thank you." Snape said with a soft smile, "now that you know that, perhaps you can stop jumping every time I speak to you in Potions!"
Neville grinned, "I'll try."
The door of the Three Broomsticks opened emitting a cold blast of air. No one really paid much attention to the duck-footed figure that almost ran in. He looked hurriedly around and then seeing his target, hurried over to the table on which Dumbledore, Daker, McGonagall, Snape, Hermione and Neville were laughing.
"I am vewy sorry to interrupt," Viktor Krum said. They all looked up at him. "Hermyonee, I 'ave to speak vith you."
"Could you excuse me?" Hermione said getting to her feat.
"By all means." Dumbledore said with a smile.
Hermione thanked him and she and Viktor went to an empty, private corner of the Three Broomsticks.
"How did you know where to find me?"
"I vent to 'Ogwarts, and they said you had gone to ze Three Broomsticks. I came to see you." Hermione gave him a small hug, he took something out his pocket, took her hand and went down on one knee. "Hermyonee Granger, vould you do me ze greatest honour, by becoming by vife." He slipped the ring onto her finger.
"Oh Viktor!" Hermione looked at the ring, "I… I don't know what to say!" She gave him a huge hug.
"Say 'yes'?"
"Of course I say yes!" She kissed him.
