Title: GONE TOO SOON
Synopsis: Spike makes a decision about his relationship with Buffy. A post-"Gone" episode fanfic.
Rating: G
Date Written: Saturday, 12 January, 2002
Author: The Resident Vampyr © 2001.
Note: Gone too soon is the 10th of a series of post-episode fanfictions based on Buffy, the Vampire Slayer season 6 episodes. I will try to write a short, mostly Spike/Buffy story every week for the entire season. Again, these are pure speculations. I don't read spoilers no early bird review. Let me know what you think.
Credits: Buffy the Vampire Slayer is the property of Joss Whedon and the powers that be.
Lyrics: No Longer Mine by The Watchmen
Characters: Buffy Willow Dawn Tara Spike


"My little... goldilocks..." - Spike to Buffy

Spike entered the Summer's house through back door, in his usual unannounced manner. He was looking for Buffy to have a word with her but found Dawn instead, eating alone in the kitchen. Dawn said Buffy was not around, ditto with Willow. In fact, she was all alone, a trend that she had gotten used to.

"You don't have to do this, you know," Dawn frowned across at the pale creature sitting on the chair. "I can manage by myself. Besides, Tara will be here any minute now." Dawn was holding the tv remote and absent-mindedly changed channels. She doesn't mind Spike hanging out with her, but she knew he was just waiting for her sister.

"I'm doing this because you're my responsibility," Spike answered back.

"No you're not," she assessed. "You're doing this because you want to get inside Buffy's pants."

Spike chuckled. Yeah right, I already made it inside Buffy's pants, Spike mused.

"Well, Buffy doesn't care about you. She doesn't care about anything," Dawn said in a detached voice.

"Is that right?" he asked curiosly. Spike wanted to know how the little bit thought about him and Buffy. But before he could ask for more, there was a knock on the door. It was Tara.

She was worried that something might have happened to Dawn. A thought that immediately ended once she found out that Spike was there, looking out for Dawn.

Soon afterwards, Buffy and Willow arrived. Willow, who was carrying the invisibility ray that they sequestered from the self-proclaimed nemeses of Buffy, was surprised to find that Tara was there. "Hey," she said.

Tara, in return, smiled at her awkwardly. "I j-just came here to check on Dawn."

"Me, too!" snapped Spike.

All eyes turned to him, including the Slayer's, who was not happy to see him. Spike, on the other hand, looked approvingly at Buffy and her new hair.

"What's with the gun?" asked Dawn.

"Oh! This is the thing that they used on Buffy," proclaimed Willow. "You know, now you see her, now you don't?"

"Who's they?"

"Remember Jonathan? Our high school trigger-happy classmate turned wizard-wannabe?" asked Buffy.

Dawn, Tara, and Spike nodded.

"He's one of them. Then there's Warren, the bot-maker. And Andrew, " Buffy enumerated.

"Who's Andrew?" Dawn and Tara asked in unison.

Buffy chuckled. "Nevermind..."

Spike winked at Buffy. She glared at him. He, then, signalled her to the back porch by jerking his head. Buffy, looking a bit uncomfortable, finally agreed.

"Uhm, Spike, can I talk to you for a sec?" said Buffy, her eyes narrowed.

"I thought you wouldn't ask," replied Spike nastily.




***



Dawn, Willow, and Tara remained in the living room after Buffy and Spike left. After a few seconds of complete silence, Dawn excused herself and went straight to her room. Willow and Tara was left alone.

"I like Buffy's hair." It was Tara who spoke first, her eyes never looked at her direction. "It's becoming."

"Yeah, I thought so too," Willow agreed.

"She gave me back the c-crystals..."

"S-She did?"

"I heard about what you're doing... about being magic-free..." Tara continued, "I'm proud of you."

Willow smiled nervously at her. Tara gave a glimpsed back, but soon turned away.




***



Buffy angrily grabbed Spike's arm and dragged him outside the back porch. How many times did she mention to Spike that he shouldn't act that way in front of Dawn, and of her friends? What if they found out about what was going on with them? Then what? Buffy cannot risk it. Not now. Not in the near future. Not ever.

"Your hair. It's..." an entralled Spike said.

"Adorable?" mocked Buffy.

"I was going to say, faire l'aimable."

"Is there anything else?" said Buffy irritably.

Buffy wanted to make it clear that this has got to stop. It's different now. Before, she doesn't have the care in the world what happened. But now, Buffy realized that she wanted to live. Now, she wanted a fresh start. No more trysts, no more clandestine affair, especially with a vampire. Besides, she can't still get over the fact that Spike threw her out earlier that day.

"I just wanted to say I'm sorry for throwing you out. But it doesn't mean I love you less," Spike apologized.

"Wrong Spike. You should thought about that before you threw me out," Buffy said coldly. She turned her back, ready to go back inside her house.

"Fine! If that's what it takes."

"W-What do you mean?" said Buffy, only this time, she carefully chose her words.

Spike resented that Buffy felt ashamed of their relationship. He wanted the world to know that he was in love with the Slayer. He wanted Buffy's friends to know that they were no longer enemies, no longer friends, but they were lovers. He wanted more than a being the Slayer's boy toy.

"I want us to be more than a passing thing Buffy," he said sincerely. "I love you, more than anybody I ever loved before. But," said Spike, despite himself.

Buffy fell silent. She slowly turned around to face the vampire, but didn't utter any words. She was confused as to what Spike was telling him. Love... a feeling that she, herself, never dared to even think about in terms of her relationship with Spike. But why now, why tonight? What was he trying to say?

"I don't wanna pretend anymore," he continued, his heart sinking horribly, "Not to myself, not to Dawn, not to your friends."

Both of them knew this wasn't real. But sometimes, even if it's not reality, it hurts.

"And as much I want to spend the rest of my life, here, with you," his voice was breaking, "I think it's time to just let me be."

"What are you saying?" she finally spoke.

"I'm saying," he paused, "...you're free."

Buffy looked at him heavily. There it was. Buffy realized that this was the turning point in their relationship. Spike no longer wanted to be nobody. He wanted to be a part of her life. Something that, if she caved in this time, would go against the very nature of her being.

Slowly, Spike turned away from her. He closed his eyes. Dreaming. Waiting. Wishing he could remain. Finally, with his head bowed, Spike reluctantly left.



I sat on the table, saw the coffee stains...
The ghosts says nothing...
Nothing could be the same, you say...
Why you bother coming?
What you hoped to find?
And it was hard, and it took time...
So just go on your way and I'll go mine...
I made up my mind, you're no longer mine...
You're no longer mine...

***





next post-episode#11

Also by The Resident Vampyr™ The Vampyr Pentateuch & Other Stories™. A compilation of Season 5 BtVS post-episode fanfictions. Visit www.vampyrslayer.cjb.net for more. Vampire Seasons™ - a compilation of season 6 BtVS post-episode fanfictions @ http://vampireseasons.cjb.net. Mirrored at http://www.fanfiction.net