[A/N: It's Saturday! So FUN! I'm almost done with this, so keep on reading, and thanks for reading all this way!]



Saturday:



[Those present: Dr. Phil, Lucius Malfoy, Draco Malfoy, Voldemort, Peter Pettigrew, Professor Trelawney, Professor Quirrel, Hermione Granger, Professor Snape, Ron Weasley, Fleur Delacour, Madam Hooch, Remus Lupin, and Sirius Black.]



Dr. Phil: Well, hello everyone, and no, my charity is not doing very well. We're unfortunately going bankrupt.



Lucius: And we care.. why?



Dr. Phil: {sniffles} You're SO harsh!



Voldemort: Just continue the meeting!



Dr. Phil: Alright. Today, we do NOT have two new members!



Ron: It's a miracle!



Hermione: But I read..



Professor Trelawney: I saw this coming!



Fleur: Frère Jacques! *hic* Frère Jacques!

Dr. Phil: I didn't finish what I was saying! Today, we have a GUEST!

Draco: I like guests.

Pettigrew: I've been workin' on the railroad! All the live long day. I've been workin' on the railroad! Just to pass the time away.

Dr. Phil: And today, our guest is.. HARRY POTTER!

*Harry enters.*

Hermione: HARRY!

Ron: NOOOOO!

Draco: POTTER!

Sirius: What? Here?

Remus: Thank gods I'm not a werewolf now!

Quirrel: SEIZE HIM!

Fleur: Dormez vous? *hic* Dormez vous?

Everyone else: NOOOOO! BOO! HISS!

Voldemort: Imper--

Draco: NO! I LOVE HIM!



Voldemort: I hate him!

Lucius: The Malfoy name is doomed.

Harry: What's all the fuss about?

Hermione: I LOVE YOU, HARRY!

Ron: I LOVE YOU, HERMIONE!

Draco: I LOVE YOU, POTTER!

Harry: Draco? You mean, you're going public about it?

Draco: YES!

Professor Trelawney: I saw this coming!

Sirius: My godson.. is.. in love.. with.. a M-Malfoy?!

Quirrel: HEY! I DO THE ST-TUTTERING!

Fleur: Sonnez les matines! *hic* Sonnez les matines!

Pettigrew: Once a jolly swagman sat beside the billabong, under the shade of a coolibah tree, and he sang as he sat and waited by the billabong, you'll come a waltzing matilda with me!

Voldemort: That was unusual.

Harry: Um, Dr. Phil told me that I was "causing a lot of tension amongst you all." Is it true?

Hermione, Draco, Remus, and Sirius: Not us!

Harry: {laughing nervously} Well, then, no need to try and like the others. They all hate me forever and there's nothing I can do about it. Bye now!

Dr. Phil: You're not going anywhere!

Harry: 'scuse me?

Dr. Phil: You're the trauma-causer for this therapy group. You're staying until they resolve their problems.

Professor Snape: How very generous of you, Dr. Phil!

Pettigrew: 'Round and 'round the cobbler's bench, the monkey chased the weasel, the monkey thought 'twas all in fun! Pop! Goes the weasel!

Fleur: Ding ding dong! *hic* Ding ding dong!

Quirrel: SEIZE HIM!

Voldemort: So, how shall we torture him?

Dr. Phil: What? Torture?

Harry: WHAT?

Hermione: NO!

Lucius: Don't watch, Hermione!

Ron: I LOVE HERMIONE!

*Voldemort cackles, and approaches Harry.*

Harry: You're not really going to torture me, are you?

Pettigrew: Pop! Goes the weasel!