Never Fall in Love

by Twix

A/N – I really hope you like this story; I'm tres proud about it. I don't own anything Moulin Rouge-ish, Camille by Alexandre Dumas, Notre Dame, NOTHING! Well, Armand is my character, so I guess that's something. :) The songs I used are Diamonds and Tears by Suzy Bogguss and Meet Me In The Red Room by Amiel. Please write a review when you're done and tell me what you think. Thank you much!

Seventeen year old Satine Zidler set her copy of Camille by Alexandre Dumas down in her lap and looked around her dressing room. "Oh, Marie, Marguerite and Armand were so in love," she said dreamily.

"Goodness, Satine," said Marie who was sitting across the room. "You've read it a hundred times, you would think you wouldn't get misty eyed by now."

Satine laughed, her voice ringing like a bell from Notre Dame. "But Marie, I love the story too much!" She silently closed the book. "I wish I were in love like Marguerite," she said under her breath.

"What did you say?" Marie said sharply, standing up from her seat.

Satine's eyes widened innocently. "I said I love the story too much!"

Marie shook her head as she sat next to Satine. "Satine, if I've told you once, I've told you a million times. You can never fall in love! Love can do mysterious things to you!"

Satine hung her head. "Yes, Marie, I know."

"It's harsh, believe me, I know," Marie said quietly. "But it could ruin your life."

Satine suddenly got up, knocking the book out of her lap. "Yes, Marie! I know! You've told me that practically every day that I've been here!" she cried before running out of her dressing room and towards the garden.

Luckily, the garden was empty. The lights on the Moulin were twinkling brightly in the afternoon sun, and the elephant seemed the tower over all of the London.

"Spent my life looking for happiness like it was buried treasure," Satine sang under her breath as she sat down on a bench shaded by the enormous elephant. "Somewhere behind the secret door, surely there were riches beyond measure."

Across the way, next to Hotel Blanche, there was a young woman with her arm entwined with a young man's, who was kissing her hand as they walked past. Satine sighed. How could she ever love?

"I would take my sanity to task, walk across broken glass to find it."

With a rule this strict, she found herself feeling guilty even thinking about love. The fairy tales, of princesses being whisked away by their Prince Charming on his white horse... they seemed so real to her for some reason.

"And no mountain top was left unclimbed," Satine sang, her voice growing stronger. "Before I ever took the time to look inside me."

Maybe it was because love was just a game at the Moulin Rouge. Love was just something to toy with, something not to take seriously.

But Satine couldn't help it, she called herself a hopeless romantic and every day, her dreams of meeting her Prince Charming became even more vivid.

"These dreams of mine, these precious years," Satine sang as she stood up and began to wander around the garden. "Oh, how they shine like diamonds and tears. The slow grace of time, the joy and the fears. Oh, how they shine like diamonds and tears."

He would have brown hair and eyes that sparkled like the stars. His smile would be dazzling and his laugh would make even the meanest of people smile. He would love Satine even if her hair had fallen out and her skin was wrinkled. He would smell lightly of smoke, mixed with the cologne he would wear and then... he would have a scent that was unique; a scent that was just for him. They would live in a cottage out in the country, away from the city and the noise. He would let Satine be who she was, there were no acts, no Sparkling Diamond. Just Satine... and him.

"Oh, sure, there was love, and of course I thought it'd be my salvation," Satine chuckled under her breath. "Yes, I have said and heard the word goodbye, felt the blade and turned the knife sideways."

Satine remembered when her mother died. Her father had blamed her death on Satine and, believing him, she had left. It seemed like she had been on the streets for week after week before Harold Zidler saved her, bringing her to the Moulin Rouge.

But now look where she was...

"But I'd crossed bridges while they burn to keep from losing what I've learned along the way," Satine sang, not caring that a dancer had come out into the garden. She started to gawk as Satine sang out to the wind.

"These dreams of mine, these precious years! Oh, how they shine like diamonds and tears!"

That's what Satine's life was made out of, diamonds and tears. Diamonds, representing her job, the highest-paid courtesan in Paris. It would haunt her for the rest of her life. Tears, representing all the pain and struggle to get to were she was.

"The slow grace of time, the joy and the fears!" Satine continued singing, letting her arms fly behind her, as if she were flying away. "Oh, how they shine like diamonds... and tears!"

"Mademoiselle Satine?"

A small voice broke Satine from her daydreaming. She turned around to see the newest addition to the Moulin Rouge, Baby Doll, who had had her nineteenth birthday just yesterday. She was two years older than Satine, but was in awe just to be speaking to her, as if it was the most exciting moment of her entire life.

"Yes?" Satine asked, acting as if she hadn't been caught singing to no one in particular.

"Harold, um, asked me to come get you," she said softly. "We need to start getting ready for the show tonight..."

Satine smiled warmly. "Thank you, Baby Doll."

Baby Doll's eyes widened. Her face plainly said She remembers my name!

Satine chuckled as they walked back to the Moulin Rouge. "How could I forget your name, Baby Doll?"

She flushed crimson, but did not answer.

"It's amazing you've fit in so well at the Moulin Rouge," Satine continued. "Because you don't seem to have much self-confidence, do you?"

She shook her head. "No, I've always been shy."

Satine grinned. "Well, the Moulin Rouge will knock that right out of you, that's for sure."

~*~

Satine sighed heavily as she smoothed out her red dress, for what had to have been the millionth time that night. When the curtains before her opened, she would see a sea of top hats and suits and they would The Sparkling Diamond.

She wondered if anyone would be able to see the real Satine.

"Satine!" someone hissed from backstage, breaking Satine from her thoughts. "Are you ready?"

She nodded and gripped the chair that was standing in front of her.

Suddenly, music started blaring and the curtains quickly opened. The crowd gave a thunderous applause, cheering loudly as they saw The Sparkling Diamond onstage, the single spotlight caused her sparkly aura to glow.

"I'll meet you in the red room; close the door and dim the lights!" Satine sang in her sultry voice, dancing provocatively around the chair. "I will be yours truly if indeed the price is right!"

She began to make her way to the edge of the stage, snatching diamond necklaces from the men's hands. "So draw your sword; be my king!" she sang into the ear of a pale, young man. "Let your passions rise and sing!"

"Just show me the diamonds and I'll let you wear my ring!" she jumped off the side of the stage and made her way through the crowd of anxious men.

"So just lay down beside me, let us consummate," Satine purred, running her finger down the cheek of an old, wrinkled man. "I know you're plastic let me help you deflate! If you want to plug in for a high-voltage connection, show me cold hard cash and I will turn on my affection!" She snatched a handful of money from a man nearby.

"So don't hesitate, I won't kiss and tell," Satine kissed the cheek of young man who looked down right frightened. "No need to worry, 'cause I'm a professional!" She kicked her leg high in the air, knocking a top hat high into the air.

"The show can start as soon as I see money on the table," she threw the money she was holding into the crowd of men following her through out the dance club. "I've an empty space to fill; I'm willing if you're able."

Satine turned around to face Toulouse-Lautrec's booth in the back of the club and gasped. Standing in front of her was a man with brown hair and eyes that sparkled like the stars. It was just how she imagined her Prince Charming.

She faltered for a moment, but caught herself. Satine wrapped her arms and purred into his ear. "I'll meet you in the red room."

He nodded, eyes wide and shaking from nerves. He let Satine lead him out of the Moulin Rouge, through the garden and through the leg of the elephant.

"So," Satine said when they got into the red room. "I think I'd like to know you better!"

He swallowed and nodded slowly.

"Let's start with the basics," Satine said lightly. "You are..."

"A-Armand Phillips," he said.

Satine's jaw dropped. "Armand?" This was too good to be true!

He nodded again.

Satine wrapped her arms around his shoulders again and started to dance slowly on the spot. She threw back her head and laughed as she watched Armand stiffly put his hand on her waist. "Loosen up, Armand!"

He took a deep breath and began to relax a little bit.

"You know," Satine breathed. "You're eyes are beautiful."

Armand smiled. "Thank you." He thought for a moment. "I would try to compliment you, but we would be here all night."

Satine laughed. "My, when I said loosen up, you really loosened up!"

He chuckled as he bravely put his other hand around her waist.

"Armand," Satine said slowly. "You're different from other men I've brought up here. They want the sex and just leave. But you don't seem like that..." She raised her eyebrow. "Unless you're hiding something from me...."

He laughed, and shook his head. "No, that's not it!"

Satine sighed as she rested her head on Armand's shoulder. She took a deep breath and there were all the scents of her Prince Charming. Smoke, cologne.... and something Satine couldn't quite put her finger on.

"I love you," Satine whispered into Armand's ear.

She widened her eyes. Did I just say that?

Satine felt Armand inhale sharply. "What?" he asked with a shaky voice.

"I love you," Satine repeated looking Armand in the eye.

"But, but," Armand stuttered. "You just saw me for the first time, not even an hour ago!"

Satine raised her eyebrow. "Do you seem disappointed to be loved by a courtesan? Most men are thrilled!"

Armand shook his head. "No, that's not it. It just...unnerved me," he admitted.

"Well, Armand Phillips," Satine purred, suddenly pushing him onto the bed. "This is love!"

~*~

Satine opened her eyes, suddenly sitting up in the bed. Armand was sleeping next to her in the bed, his arm around her waist.

I need to talk to Marie, Satine thought frantically as she picked her up her clothes off the floor. She rushed behind the folding screen and hurriedly put on her clothes. When she stepped out from the screen, she found Armand sitting on the bed, buttoning up his shirt.

"Why, Armand," Satine said with a smile on her face. "How nice to see you awake!" She walked over and sat next to him.

"How did you sleep?" Armand asked without a waver in his voice anymore.

"Oh, I think you can answer that for me!" Satine wrapped her arm around his neck and kissed him deeply.

Armand shifted from where he was sitting and put his hand on her waist. Satine squealed, letting go of Armand. "Armand, dear, I'm so sorry, but I must go."

Armand's face fell, but he nodded.

"Will you be at the show tonight?" Satine asked, picking up his hat and handing it to him.

"Yes, I'll be here," Armand said.

"Then I'll see you later!" Satine said with a wink before walking out of the Red Room.

Oh God, what have I gotten myself into? Satine thought as she ran out of the elephant and towards her dressing room. Is this really love? Is there such thing as love at first sight? Questions raced through her mind.

"Marie!" Satine cried, bursting through her dressing room door.

"Satine!" Marie said. "How did last night go?"

"I-I..." Satine said, scared to tell Marie. "I told him that I loved him..."

"And he believed you?" Marie threw back her head and laughed. "It works every time, Satine!"

Satine's eyes widened in horror. She stood there, unable to believe what was happening. "How can you not take that seriously?" Satine said under her breath.

Marie looked at her oddly. "How can I take it seriously? You obviously don't really love him!"

Tears started to flow from Satine's eyes. "Oh, Marie..." she breathed.

"What, Satine?" she asked, walking over to her. "What's wrong?"

Satine shook her head and ran from the dressing room. Why did I even think of telling Marie? Satine thought as she ran through the garden. I don't even know if I am in love!

"Satine! Satine!" A voice called from across the garden.

Satine looked up, tears streaking her face. Armand was running over to her from the bench under the elephant. Oh no, Satine moaned to herself. She wiped her eyes quickly, hoping Armand wouldn't notice.

"Satine!" Armand said breathlessly. "What's wrong, my love? Why are you crying?"

Satine looked up. "What did you call me?" she demanded.

Armand gave her an odd look. "I called you my love, Satine. What's wrong with that?" He moved in closer, trying to wipe away the tears that were flowing down her cheeks.

"No!" she cried, moving away from Armand's grip. "No!"

"W-What ever do you mean?" Armand said, looking slightly hurt.

She just shook her head, red curls flying, and ran into the elephant.

~*~

"Mademoiselle Satine!" Toulouse-Lautrec exclaimed when Satine sat down at his booth. "What bwings you to this small cowner of the Moulin?"

Satine sighed. "Oh, I don't know, Toulouse." She had just finished her dance number for the night and was positively exhausted.

"Now, Mademoiselle Satine," Toulouse said, lowering his voice. "There was a young man over here saying the most intewesting thing!"

"And what might that be?" Satine asked, dreading the answer.

"He said that Satine, the Spawkwing Diamond, loved him!" Toulouse said. "'We are vewy much in love,' he said."

"Oh no," Satine moaned. "How could have Armand do that?" She hid her face in her arms.

"You know this man?" Toulouse asked, lightly patting Satine's arm.

Satine nodded.

"Do you weally love him?" Toulouse asked in a small voice.

Satine looked up. "I don't know, Toulouse, I just don't know. I think..." she said, choosing her words wisely. "I think I made myself believe I was in love. Or maybe... Maybe I found myself just a little bit attracted to him and overreacted by thinking...By thinking it was love."

"Those are all pwosible," Toulouse said. "And don't wowwy, Satine, this happens to many at the Moulin Rouge."

"Really?" Satine asked. "But Marie said –"

"Mawie!" Toulouse laughed. "Mawie was one to fall in love hersewf!"

"What? Marie fell in love here?" Satine exclaimed.

Toulouse nodded earnestly. "With Hawold Zidwir! A long time ago, he had fawwen in love with a young can-can dancer. That was Mawie!"

"Wow, I never knew that!" Satine said. She felt very hurt; how could Marie be so hypocritical? Telling her never to fall in love, when she had done that herself!

"Satine!"

She spun around in her seat and found herself face to face with Armand. "We need to talk!" She said angrily, grabbing his hand and leading to the garden.

"What is it, Satine?" Armand asked when they were sitting down on a bench.

"How could you tell everyone that I loved you?" Satine cried. "You said we were very much in love! How could you?"

Armand's jaw dropped. "I – I said that because we are in love! We are very much in love." He stood up, took Satine's hands and started to kiss them, just like the couple Satine saw yesterday. "Aren't we, my love?"

"Don't call me that," Satine said, looking at her feet.

"Why not?" he cried. "I love you, Satine! I couldn't stop thinking about you while we were apart. I love you with all my heart!" His eyes were wide with anticipation. "Please tell me you feel the same way."

Satine looked Armand in the eye. "No. No, I don't feel the same way."

The sparkle in Armand's eyes left immediately. He dropped Satine's hands and took a step back. "But, but last night! You said that you –"

"Armand! I'm a courtesan!" Satine cried. "Do you really think I could fall in love?"

"So it was all a lie...," Armand said quietly.

Satine nodded. "Yes. Armand, there's something you have to understand about the Moulin Rouge. No one can fall in love!" She paused for a moment. "I think I was just trying to make myself believe I was in love."

"You think?"

Satine sighed. "Armand, I'm so sorry."

He fished around for something in his pocket, pulled it out and threw it at Satine's feet. "I should have known. It was just too good to be true," Armand said coldly. "You're just a nasty little whore."

Armand turned on his heel and walked away from the Moulin Rouge, disappearing into the darkness.

Wiping away tears, Satine bent down and picked up what Armand had thrown at her feet. It was a small little box covered in velvet. Satine held her breath, knowing what was inside, as she opened it. There was a small, dainty ring that held a single diamond. Inside the box, there was a note.

To my dearest love,

Armand

What a fool he was, Satine thought angrily. She closed the box with a snap and held it above her head.

But a moment before she threw it onto the roof of the Moulin, she stopped herself. She opened the box again and studied the ring. Then she took it out and slipped it onto her finger.

~*~

As Satine walked out of the elephant the next day, she saw Toulouse running towards her and newspaper in his hand.

"Mademoiselle Satine! Mademoiselle Satine!"

"What is it, Toulouse?" she asked.

"Armand is dead!" Toulouse said, struggling to catch his breath as he handed Satine the newspaper.

"What?" Satine cried, covering her mouth with her hand. She took the newspaper from his hand. "Died of Absinthe overdose," Satine read. "Oh, Toulouse, what have I done?"

"It's not your fault, Satine," Toulouse said kindly. "It was his fault that he thought you loved him."

"Oh, I must tell Marie," Satine said before dashing off to find Marie.

Marie was in the Satine's dressing room, dusting off a large lamp.

"Oh, Marie!" Satine cried as she ran into the room, setting herself down on the couch. "He's dead!"

"Dead?" Marie asked. "Who's dead?"

"Armand," she said, wiping a tear from her eye.

"And who's Armand?" Marie sat down next to Satine and started to brush her hair.

"The man I told you about," she said. "I had told him I loved him. And the fool, he took me seriously!"

"Oh, dear," Marie said quietly.

"And – and I seemed to believe myself too!"

"But you didn't fall in love with him, did you?" Marie asked.

"Marie!" Satine burst out, jumping up from her seat. "I don't need a lecture right now! Toulouse told me about you and Harold, so don't go telling me I shouldn't do something, when you've done it yourself!"

Marie looked down at her lap. "I'm sorry, Satine. I didn't want you to get hurt like I did. I-I lost my job because of it. I knew that we were the only family you had... I didn't want you to loose it."

Tears started to flow down Satine's cheek. "Oh, Marie..." She rushed over and flung her arms around her. "I'm so sorry, I never knew."

"It's alright, love," Marie said, patting Satine's head. "It's alright."

Satine sat back down and wiped her face off.

Marie took Satine's hand and studied it. "Where did you get that ring, Satine?"

"I got it from Armand," Satine whispered. "It's my reminder that I can never fall in love."