Note: A few who read this might recognize this story. A few names have been changed, but other than that, it is the same story. *G* I hope you enjoy it, and I would love to have some reviews!

Also, the usual- I'm not associated with Robert Jordan or Tor at all, etc. etc.

Sinead sat at her desk, writing a short report to Sallah, the Head of her Ajah. She had one of the most extensive networks of Eyes and Ears in the Tower, and she'd just received disturbing news from Tear. Another Shadow army, appearing without warning. Her spies hadn't seen then arriving, but there was little doubt in Sinead's mind that they'd Traveled. She knew of no Waygates in that part of the world, and besides, they were supposedly unusable now, unaccountably locked for all time by some unknown person or thing.

She shifted her elbow, sighing heavily. That afternoon had been yet another bureaucratic battle, a nightmare of the Game of Houses as Aes Sedai discussed this and that while evading the real issue. Sinead pondered the wording of her next sentence, and then wrote carefully, before returning to her musing. The real problem was that there was no visible way of telling Black sisters and brothers from those sworn to the Light, without summoning all the Aes Sedai back to the Tower, and having every single one of them re-swear the first Oath before denying it.

Sinead had hated the entire debate. She thought that Kesinda, the Amyrlin who had come to the Amyrlin Seat when Ariana stepped down, should just bring a halt to it and actually Ido/I something. The only reason it continued was because the stupid woman didn't want to make a move for fear of making enemies. And the Shadow would consume them if something didn't happen soon. Sinead winced, and straightened, putting a hand to her neck, where strained muscles were beginning to protest.

"You okay?" Lundren asked, coming to stand behind her, hands on her shoulders. "Those meetings be stressful, and they never get anything done, or so you tell me. Why don't you just skip a few?" She tipped her head back and smiled at him, eyes dreamy as she stared up at his face. She remembered when his looks had changed so dramatically. It had been the beginning of their relationship, that inadvertent trip to Itel'aran'rhiod/I, though perhaps neither of them realized it at the time. She reached up and tucked a stray hair back.

"Kesinda would take any opportunity she could to remove me from the Hall," she said, allowing her hand to drop. "She doesn't like me because I don't play IDaes Dae'mar/I," she added after a moment. "I see through her pretenses, and reveal to the Hall what she doesn't want them to know. I know for a fact that she wanted Giram and Nameca's trip to Rhuidean for Iangreal/I to be a secret until they got back." He nodded, and she lifted the paper from the desk. "When Sallah gives this to her, she'll probably say my contacts are exaggerating, and never bring it up again. But there are people dying out there that I could help, if I could only get her to lift this ridiculous order to remain in the Tower until further orders."

She could just go, despite the order, but the problem would be when she returned, when Kesinda would very likely try to get her tried and stilled. She sighed again, and stood. She was already almost ready for bed, as she'd been preparing for sleep when that novice had come from the pigeon lofts with the reports. She walked over to the bed and sat down, gathering her hair up and plaiting it unhurriedly. It took her quite a long time, as it was long enough that, standing, it reached nearly to her knees. It tugged at her head, and felt wonderfully heavy when she moved.

"A non-devious person right now is quite a relief, I think," Lundren said, stretching out beside her. "Especially when she's you, and right here." Sinead blushed, and lay down, resting against him. He waved almost negligently, and the lamps went out. There are light moments even in the darkest times, and sometimes the light outweighs the dark. That night was one of them.

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She woke with a queer feeling in her mind; Lasana was definitely upset about something. She opened her eyes slightly, and there was Lasana, dressed in shimmering white silk, staring down at her with the oddest expression on her face. Her hair was up, a silver chain with a milky white stone swinging on it hanging over her forehead. Upon being raised to Aes Sedai, her sister had decided that a few things about being a noble weren't so bad- that chain was one of them.

Sinead sat up slowly. "What's wrong, first-sister?" She asked quietly. Waking Lundren was not something she wanted to do. He wasn't a Sitter, but his life was still too busy to have his sleep interrupted. "Has Kesinda done something stupid? Will I need my-" she glanced at Lundren, and gave a start. He seemed to be only sleeping, but there was a knot on his head that was gradually going purple, and he looked slightly startled. She looked back at Lasana.

The slender Cairhienin woman held a knife in her hand, and seemed on the point of tears. She also seemed to be fighting something, unable to stop herself as she took a step forward. "I…" she said, and Sinead saw the muscles move, felt the intention through the bond. She threw herself off the bed, and at her sister, just as the knife flashed down, to slice through the bed sheets and the mattress. "Don't stop me! I can't stop!" Lasana wailed, as Sinead's weight toppled her to the ground. She hadn't let go of the knife, and Sinead grabbed the other woman's wrist, holding the knife away from her.

"I must do this…I must…" Lasana's eyes weren't focused on anything, rolling around wildly, and Sinead took a slight step back. "The Great Lord demands that I must…" A shock went rippling through Sinead's consciousness, and without thinking, she slammed a shield over her sister's ability to channel, and bound her into place with flows of Air.

"Lasana!" She gasped. "IWhat did you just say?/I" Her mind couldn't make her understand the words as she stood there, holding the one woman she had thought she could trust, held her away so Lasana wouldn't kill her. "Please, answer me!" Lasana glared at her, and struggled against the bonds. She appeared to have forgotten she could channel, because she didn't fight the shield, didn't even feel for it.

"The- the Great Lord…I must obey the Great Lord…" Lasana murmured, as if she herself couldn't quite understand the words. She stood still for a moment, and then, to Sinead's astonishment, rebellion flared in that knot of emotions. "I won't! I can't. She's my sister, I swore- I ca-" she cut off, and so much pain flooded through their bond that Sinead winced, gritting her teeth, before gingerly reaching out and putting a hand on Lasana's shoulder.

The Cairhienin woman stiffened, glaring at her. "Lasana," Sinead said quietly. "I won't let you go, but maybe I will listen if you tell me why." She sat down on her bed. Lasana had knocked Lundren out, and was trying to kill her. The question reverberated in her mind- 'IWhy?/I'

The rebellious feeling came back, and Lasana's lips seemed to be fighting what she was saying. "I…It was Black Aes- I must! I must!" she was panting, now, fighting with all she had. "I- I couldn't resis- No! I cannot! I must- let me go!" She threw herself at the wall of air holding her away from Sinead, and Sinead stared at her in astonishment. Black Aes Sedai? She couldn't resist? Still couldn't, by all evidence. What had happened to her? She sent a tendril of sympathy through the bond, and Lasana went still again, staring at her, her eyes seeming ready to come out of her head. "Help me, first-sister, I cannot-" She bit down, hard, as more pain came, and a strangled scream came from her tightly closed lips, her eyes rolling back in her head once more.

When it stopped, she was trembling, hanging in the bonds, and a thin line of blood had run from the corner of her mouth, down her chin, and disappeared into her hair. Sinead frowned, and her mind began to click the pieces together. Was there a way to force a person -specifically an Aes Sedai- to the Shadow? Or maybe she'd been Compulsed…IOr maybe she's pretending/I… Except that the bond never lied, and Lasana had been in agony just then, and the entire link had carried a sense of fighting something so immense, so heavy, that it threatened to squash her first-sister without thought. Sinead gritted her teeth, and released the Source- the wall and the shield along with it. She had to trust, now, or she would lose her sister. "The bond, Lasana. Hold it! Don't let go. It will hurt, but hold on! I will not fight you, if you truly do want to kill me; the Wheel weaves as the Wheel wills." IBut I don't want to die yet…/I

She stood up, closing her eyes, and concentrated on pulling her sister back, of bringing her back to the love she surely felt through the bond…ICan she even feel it?/I Sinead sat back, and Lasana's arm lowered. Another battle took place, with Lasana appearing to talk to herself as she fought against what she'd been forced to do. Lasana fell to her knees heavily, huddling over her knife hand, and Sinead waited, still struggling to hold on, to stay there for her sister. Something snapped, and Sinead's eyes opened, staring downward. Lasana had shoved the knife between two floorboards, and her weight had broken the blade.

Still, she grappled with her invisible foe, as she tried to drop it. Sinead found herself tensing all her muscles, and forced herself to go through novice exercises until she relaxed. Lasana scrambled to her feet once more, the knife hilt in her hand, panting. She stood straight, and as tall as she could, her shoulders thrust back, and her chin up proudly. Slowly, her eyes on Sinead's, she put her hand out to her side, and opened her hand, though the knuckles of her other hand went as white as her dress when she did. The knife fell, and Sinead felt herself release a breath she hadn't realized she'd been holding since the blade broke.

Lasana seemed to fold to the floor, the bond blurring as consciousness faded, and Sinead lifted her gently, setting her on the bed, wiping her face off gently, and smoothing her hair away from it. She put her hands on Lasana's head, and wove her inadequate flows of Healing, sending them through her sister's body. It woke her up, but did nothing for the headache, or for the lip that she had nearly bitten through. Sinead looked at Lundren, and scrambled across the bed, putting her hands on his head, as well. He blinked, the purple knot slightly smaller but no less painful, Sinead was sure, and sat up. "What be happening?" He asked in confusion, and then saw Lasana. "You! You hit me with the Power! What be going on here? Why did you attack me?" Lasana flushed where she sat, looking down at her toes, huddling into herself.

"Lasana was forced to do it. I haven't yet learned why or how." Sinead said, putting an arm around each of them. "All that really matters is that it wasn't voluntary, but I would like to know what happened, Lasana."

Lasana told her tale haltingly, occasionally stopping, to draw a deep breath, or fight back fear that the pain would come back. A week or so before, Bethasin had requested her aid, and had taken her down to the dungeons. She'd gone willingly enough, thinking that the other White needed help with the Iter'angreal/I. But a circle of thirteen had been waiting for her, as well as thirteen Halfmen. "They hurt me so badly, Sinead," Lasana said almost unintelligibly, her voice lowering to an unintelligible gibber as she went over the memories. "They forced me to mask my bond to you, and Gabriell, and-" she cut off, and Sinead knew she had been about to say 'and Darmou' but had remembered that Lundren did not know. "- and then they gave me to the Myrddraal to play with, while they readied their…operations." She fell silent -collecting herself- before continuing, in a slightly stronger voice. "Then they…they turned me. They said there was no way to reverse it, that I would serve the Shadow forever, knowing what I was doing, and unable to stop it. I fought, every time I had to do something at their orders…before now, though, nothing meant enough to me to fight with everything I had. Not- not until they said…said I had to kill Iyou…/I"

She fell silent, sobbing miserably, and Sinead could only agree with that emotion. "How," Lundren asked suddenly into the silence, leaning forward intently, that white lock of hair making him suddenly look quite intimidating, "do we know you are telling the truth?" Sinead gaped at him, then realized he had a point- until she remembered the look in Lasana's eyes when Sinead had spoken to her. And the bond. Lundren did know about it, but maybe he didn't realize how like a Warder-bond it really was- and how un-like in some ways.

"I will re-swear the Oaths and swear on my bond with Sinead my first-sister that I did none of it willingly. Nothing in the world means as much to me, Lundren Montin Aes Sedai, not even my life." She said, staring him in the eye while she spoke. "And I will confess my crimes to the Amyrlin Seat and the Hall. With or without coercion, I was the one who committed them. I won't have a novice turned from the Tower for things I have done." She put her hands to her head, face pale, and Sinead winced, biting her lip. Her sister had a headache that would have had her on her back, if she'd had it.

"I believe you." Lundren said slowly, his posture relaxing slightly. His eyes suddenly flashed away from her, as if they'd seen something they didn't want to, and rested on Sinead. She stared back at him, and then smiled slightly, nodding. It was good to know that Lasana had Lundren's trust. Again.

Lasana stood up, straightening herself up as best she could, and Sinead followed, embracing her warmly, holding her as she had after they'd become first-sisters. "I believe Gabriell and Darmou will be worried for you, Lasana. The bond tells much, even when masked. IEspecially/I when masked," she murmured. She was the only one that knew that Lasana had two Warders, though she couldn't completely comprehend Iwhy/I she'd bonded Darmou, and Lasana never said. The interesting thing had been watching the White's bond to Gabriell change- from him being her fetch-n-carry, to their love affair being the talk of the novice quarters after lights' out.

Lasana stayed in her embrace for a few minutes, the link between them flooded with relief, and love, and then she stepped away. Her face red, she hastily turned away, striding out of the room. Sinead got back into bed, and curled up, to rid her bones of the chill that had lodged in them, and would not leave. Lundren put an arm around her, and though she still lay awake for a long time, she was a little warmer, and not so alone. And when she finally did fall asleep, it was to sleep soundly, with pleasant dreams.