Rolly Polly Fish Heads

This is not the greatest story in the world, it's just a tribute. O_O sorry too much Tenacious D. God I haven't updated in .....forever. I had nearly forgotten about this fic! Shame shame. I should end it quickly since its really going no where =)
Sano:You're a horrible author
*giggle* I KNOW!

~~~~~~
So, as time went on in the crazy world of Behind the Scenes, a queer incident happened.
As Sano was going into a convenient store, which isn't all that convenient since he has to walk five blocks to get to it, he was confronted by a little girl in a pleated green skirt and t-shirt with a sash.
"Hello sir, would you like to buy some Girl Scout cookies?"
"What?"
"Girl Scout cookies!"
"I...I only was going to come here to get some Milk and T.P and some cigarettes"
"Ah Milk? Our cookies are delicious with milk!"
"I really don't think I have enough on me."
"Then don't buy the cigarettes."
"They aren't for me."
"Then why are you buying them."
"'Cause there's a big tall man with gold eyes waiting for them at my apartment."
"What's he doing there sir?"
"Um....Cheating on his wife?"
"That sounds terrible. A man like that shouldn't have cigarettes. A good man like you should take this bad man's money and buy GIRL SCOUT COOKIES!"
"But I'm not really into Girl Scout Cookies"
"Have you ever had any?"
"Well....no but"
"Ah I see I see"
"What?! What do you see!?"
"Well it's quite obvious why you don't want the cookies."
"What!?"
"You're too in love with the bad man to stray from the path he set you out on! So now, in your feeble attempt to please him you will use your HARD EARNED CASH to buy him the cigarettes which are actually KILLING HIM SLOWLY and it's a shame. A big SHAME! Because you're in love with a bad man. Because he's just manipulating you into buying him stuff and letting him use your body in whatever way he pleases. You really need to free yourself of this harmful man. He'll only lead you to your most incredibly depressing and inevitable downfall."
"Wha...How...Why..."
"Don't speak. I know what you're thinking."
"Isn't that No Doubt"
"Shh. Shh. It's okay. I can tell you're in pain young one"
"I'm like ten years older than you"
"I see such a horrible fall for you, and it's all because of this foolish passion you have for this man. Now, I see only one way for you to cure yourself of this man."
"What's that"
"Buy Girl Scout Cookies"
".....You're not gonna leave me alone until I do are you?"
"Never, I'll haunt you like the ghost of Christmas past."
"Fine, I'll buy a box. What kinda cookies have you got."
"Well we have Thin Mints, Lemon Drops, Caramel Delights, Pea-"
"Caramel Delights? What are those?"
"They're caramel and coconut and chocolate"
"I'll take it!"
"YAY! Wow, how'd you choose that one?"
"I have fond memories of caramel...."
"Like when you were a Porn star?"
"HOW'D YOU KNOW!"
"My brother and dad are huge perverts"
"Okay, so just give me the cookies."
"Hmmn, now I just had a brilliant idea..."
"Oh no"
"You...or so I've heard from an anonymous yet very reliable resource, that you're ashamed of your previous career. And that you'd be devestated if it were ever to be released to the public or to the press. Now, my father and brother just happen to have some copies of your 'debut work'. I know it would be just a DAMN SHAME if you were to have those, oh let's say, played in a Blockbuster preview tv?"
"How would you do that?"
"Oh believe me Mister Libido. I can"
"Oh god you know my old nickname too..."
"I know LOTS of stuff honey"
"Are you sure you're a Girl Scout?"
"One of the best."
"So you're blackmailing me"
"I am"
"What do you want me to do."
"I want you, to get some of your actor buddies, to help in a bake sale."
"WHAT!?"
"That's right. A bake sale. We're raising money for a trip to France."
"Can't I just pay your way."
"Oh but then what if Jenny, and Midge, and Viviane, and Clarie didn't get to go? I would be just CRUSHED!"
"You don't look so devistated. You're smiling for Christ sake!"
"Oh but I'm just so confident that you'll pull through! With at least FIVE of the MAIN characters. Don't bring some cheap one episode only character. We want headliners here."
"And if I don't pull through, you'll release the tapes."
"Yep"
"And what happens afterwards? Will you give me the tapes?"
"Sounds reasonable enough."
"Okay, I'll do my best to get at least FIVE of the main characters to help in the bake sale"
"Five OTHER than you"
"DAMMIT"
"Now, here you are sir. Your Caramel Delights"
"Hmmrgrgph"
"Oh Sir?"
"What!?"
"You forgot to buy your Milk, TP, and cigarettes for your lover."
"How'd you know he was my lover!?!"
"You blushed when you talked about him."
"You remembered a minute detail from so long ago!?"
"I have a killer memory."


~~~Next Chapter A Worthy Cause

AHH! Wasn't she cool! And I know I jumped from a nothing's happening chapter to OH MY GOD WHEN'D ALL THIS HAPPEN! But That'll all come out in later chapters! I promise!
Girl Scout of Doom:It better
EEP!...you're scary