More Insanity!!
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Author's Note: I'm really, really, really sorry about turning them into pink fluffy bunnies, but, hey, a girl has to have fun SOMEHOW, now doesn't she?
Disclaimer crap: I don't own Gundam Wing. Nor do I own Geico, American Express, or any of the other companies whose ads I'm about to parody. And please don't sue me, I'm broke from buying anime!!
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Wufei: You've got to be kidding! Another Geico ad?
Author: Yup.
Trowa: .....
Quatre: Trowa's still mad about being turned into a pink fluffy bunny.
Duo: I will never deny the power of an insane author again. Especially not her! *points at the author of this messed up little story*
Author: GOOD! Now, let's get this ad started!
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Heero: *walks out to check mail, opens car insurance bill*
*music starts...followed by chirping crickets*
Author: Well?
Heero: Do I have to?
Author: Yes, you have to. Unless you want to be made into something worse than a PINK, FLUFFY, BUNNY!! *laughs as Heero cringes at the mere thought*
Heero: Okay then...*flat, emotionless voice* I'm so happy, I'm floating on Cloud Nine. I'm so happy, until the end of time...*is joined by Quatre, Duo, Wufei, Zechs, and Treize who also got lower car insurance bills and are singing in fake, overly happy voices.*
Quatre, Duo,Wufei, Zechs, and Treize: I'm so happy! I'm floating on Cloud Nine! I'm so happy--*line up in chorus line* Can-can can you do the can-can? *They all continue singing the Can-can song and doing the can-can*
Heero: Oh my God...*twitch, twitch*
Trowa: *sitting up in tree* Now that's happy, bay-bee!
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Oh lookie! Another credit card ad!
-----------------------------------------------------
Relena: *is shopping with a Visa card, puts the stuff she's trying to buy on the counter...incindentally, the counter Heero's working at.* Here, can I pay for these here?
Heero: No, you can't.
Relena: Why not? My card is-
Heero: Your card is no dang good! We don't TAKE Visas! *points to a sign*
Relena: Oh, dear....
Quatre: You shoulda used American Express!
Duo: Yeah! It's accepted in more places than Visa!
Wufei: Stupid woman...*tries to leave shop, sets off alarm* Crap!
Sally: How could you? I can't believe you'd shoplift! Noin, Une...take him downtown!
*Noin and Une grab Wufei's arms and drag him away*
Wufei: NO! I SHALL NOT BE SO UNCEREMONIUSLY DRAGGED OFF BY THESE WEAK WOMEN!!
Une: Can it, Wu-man.
Noin: Yeah! We only look weak! *hits Wufei*
Wufei: THAT'S POLICE BRUTALITY!!
Noin: *shoves Wufei into the cop car and drives off*
Une: Hey! Wait for me!
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Making fun of Wendy's
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Trowa: *walks into restraunt on a cold snowy day*
Duo: What can I get you?
Trowa: Chili.
Duo: Chilly? Yeah, we know it's chilly out there, pal...
Trowa: No, you airhead! I want a freakin' bowl of chili!
Duo: Geez! Calm down! *puts on heavy rubber boots* Let's go to Wendy's! *jumps over counter, grabs Trowa by the arm, and shouts "Treize, I'm on break!" before dragging Trowa off*
*Little blurb about how you can get chili and stuff at Wendy's for 99 cents*
*Scene shifts, Duo is now behind the counter again as Sylvia Noventa walks in*
Sylvia Noventa: Umm...baked potato?
Duo: I'd go to Wendy's with ya, but I just ate.
Sylvia: *slaps Duo and leaves*
Treize: Dude, I think she likes you!
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Have you ever seen that Halls cough drop ad?
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Heero: *cough, cough, wheeze, wheeze*
*camera moves and we see Trowa breathing this cold frosty air down Heero's neck*
Duo: Don't let old man winter slow you down! You need Halls defense with Vitamin C!
*Quatre shows up, wearing an American football uniform that says "Halls Defense". He runs at Trowa and...stops*
Quatre: Please, don't make me jump him!
Author: Too bad, I'm going to...unless you want to be PINK FLUFFY BUNNIES again!
*All cringe*
Quatre: Okay, then...*starts running at Trowa* I don't believe in violence! I don't believe in violence! *runs into Trowa and knocks him into a window* Oh, dear...TROWA!!
Heero: *blink, blink* Omae o korosu, Gurizabera, Omae o korosu...
Author: I'll bet you say that to ALL the girls...
Duo: He does, actually.
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1-800-CALL-ATT
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Trowa: *on ice, wearing this hockey uniform and standing by a pay phone*
Author: Well?
Trowa: *flat, emotionless voice* You can make collect calls free for you and cheap for them by dialing down the center and calling 1-800-CALL-ATT. Did I mention it was free for you and cheap for them?
*Une skates up, dressed as a referee*
Une: Bad Acting! That's a penalty!
Trowa: HEY! I THOUGHT I WAS DOING JUST FREAKING FINE, THANKS!
Une: Harassing the ref! Get to the penalty box!!
Trowa: Why don't you MAKE ME?!
Une: Noin! C'mere and help me get this idiot into the penalty box!
Trowa: Okay, okay, I'm going!!
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McDonald's Ad
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Duo: *reading newspaper* Hmm...Treize is injured and can't fight with Wufei..
Zechs: I must go! *walks away*
Relena's voice: Any excuse is a good one to get to McDonald's--
Heero's voice: Shut it! Shut it! Shut it!
Relena's voice: Hee-chan!
Heero's voice: I've been waiting a long time for this...
Relena's voice: Yes, Hee-chan, I'll marry you!
Heero's voice: Say good-bye! *sound of gunshot, followed by Heero's insane laughter*
Duo: That was disturbing. *sees Zechs has walked back in* So, where's Wufei's head on a platter?
Zechs: Oh...*walks back out*
*Heero's insane laughter continues*
Duo: Will you quit the laughing, Heero? It's very disturbing!!
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I'm stopping there. Before I get really weird.
Please don't be offendedd. This is all humorous!!
By the way, fudgy marshmallow cookies for those who review!
*puts a platter of cookies on table for those who reviewed already*
---------------------------------------
Author's Note: I'm really, really, really sorry about turning them into pink fluffy bunnies, but, hey, a girl has to have fun SOMEHOW, now doesn't she?
Disclaimer crap: I don't own Gundam Wing. Nor do I own Geico, American Express, or any of the other companies whose ads I'm about to parody. And please don't sue me, I'm broke from buying anime!!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Wufei: You've got to be kidding! Another Geico ad?
Author: Yup.
Trowa: .....
Quatre: Trowa's still mad about being turned into a pink fluffy bunny.
Duo: I will never deny the power of an insane author again. Especially not her! *points at the author of this messed up little story*
Author: GOOD! Now, let's get this ad started!
----------
Heero: *walks out to check mail, opens car insurance bill*
*music starts...followed by chirping crickets*
Author: Well?
Heero: Do I have to?
Author: Yes, you have to. Unless you want to be made into something worse than a PINK, FLUFFY, BUNNY!! *laughs as Heero cringes at the mere thought*
Heero: Okay then...*flat, emotionless voice* I'm so happy, I'm floating on Cloud Nine. I'm so happy, until the end of time...*is joined by Quatre, Duo, Wufei, Zechs, and Treize who also got lower car insurance bills and are singing in fake, overly happy voices.*
Quatre, Duo,Wufei, Zechs, and Treize: I'm so happy! I'm floating on Cloud Nine! I'm so happy--*line up in chorus line* Can-can can you do the can-can? *They all continue singing the Can-can song and doing the can-can*
Heero: Oh my God...*twitch, twitch*
Trowa: *sitting up in tree* Now that's happy, bay-bee!
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Oh lookie! Another credit card ad!
-----------------------------------------------------
Relena: *is shopping with a Visa card, puts the stuff she's trying to buy on the counter...incindentally, the counter Heero's working at.* Here, can I pay for these here?
Heero: No, you can't.
Relena: Why not? My card is-
Heero: Your card is no dang good! We don't TAKE Visas! *points to a sign*
Relena: Oh, dear....
Quatre: You shoulda used American Express!
Duo: Yeah! It's accepted in more places than Visa!
Wufei: Stupid woman...*tries to leave shop, sets off alarm* Crap!
Sally: How could you? I can't believe you'd shoplift! Noin, Une...take him downtown!
*Noin and Une grab Wufei's arms and drag him away*
Wufei: NO! I SHALL NOT BE SO UNCEREMONIUSLY DRAGGED OFF BY THESE WEAK WOMEN!!
Une: Can it, Wu-man.
Noin: Yeah! We only look weak! *hits Wufei*
Wufei: THAT'S POLICE BRUTALITY!!
Noin: *shoves Wufei into the cop car and drives off*
Une: Hey! Wait for me!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Making fun of Wendy's
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Trowa: *walks into restraunt on a cold snowy day*
Duo: What can I get you?
Trowa: Chili.
Duo: Chilly? Yeah, we know it's chilly out there, pal...
Trowa: No, you airhead! I want a freakin' bowl of chili!
Duo: Geez! Calm down! *puts on heavy rubber boots* Let's go to Wendy's! *jumps over counter, grabs Trowa by the arm, and shouts "Treize, I'm on break!" before dragging Trowa off*
*Little blurb about how you can get chili and stuff at Wendy's for 99 cents*
*Scene shifts, Duo is now behind the counter again as Sylvia Noventa walks in*
Sylvia Noventa: Umm...baked potato?
Duo: I'd go to Wendy's with ya, but I just ate.
Sylvia: *slaps Duo and leaves*
Treize: Dude, I think she likes you!
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Have you ever seen that Halls cough drop ad?
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Heero: *cough, cough, wheeze, wheeze*
*camera moves and we see Trowa breathing this cold frosty air down Heero's neck*
Duo: Don't let old man winter slow you down! You need Halls defense with Vitamin C!
*Quatre shows up, wearing an American football uniform that says "Halls Defense". He runs at Trowa and...stops*
Quatre: Please, don't make me jump him!
Author: Too bad, I'm going to...unless you want to be PINK FLUFFY BUNNIES again!
*All cringe*
Quatre: Okay, then...*starts running at Trowa* I don't believe in violence! I don't believe in violence! *runs into Trowa and knocks him into a window* Oh, dear...TROWA!!
Heero: *blink, blink* Omae o korosu, Gurizabera, Omae o korosu...
Author: I'll bet you say that to ALL the girls...
Duo: He does, actually.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
1-800-CALL-ATT
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Trowa: *on ice, wearing this hockey uniform and standing by a pay phone*
Author: Well?
Trowa: *flat, emotionless voice* You can make collect calls free for you and cheap for them by dialing down the center and calling 1-800-CALL-ATT. Did I mention it was free for you and cheap for them?
*Une skates up, dressed as a referee*
Une: Bad Acting! That's a penalty!
Trowa: HEY! I THOUGHT I WAS DOING JUST FREAKING FINE, THANKS!
Une: Harassing the ref! Get to the penalty box!!
Trowa: Why don't you MAKE ME?!
Une: Noin! C'mere and help me get this idiot into the penalty box!
Trowa: Okay, okay, I'm going!!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
McDonald's Ad
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Duo: *reading newspaper* Hmm...Treize is injured and can't fight with Wufei..
Zechs: I must go! *walks away*
Relena's voice: Any excuse is a good one to get to McDonald's--
Heero's voice: Shut it! Shut it! Shut it!
Relena's voice: Hee-chan!
Heero's voice: I've been waiting a long time for this...
Relena's voice: Yes, Hee-chan, I'll marry you!
Heero's voice: Say good-bye! *sound of gunshot, followed by Heero's insane laughter*
Duo: That was disturbing. *sees Zechs has walked back in* So, where's Wufei's head on a platter?
Zechs: Oh...*walks back out*
*Heero's insane laughter continues*
Duo: Will you quit the laughing, Heero? It's very disturbing!!
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I'm stopping there. Before I get really weird.
Please don't be offendedd. This is all humorous!!
By the way, fudgy marshmallow cookies for those who review!
*puts a platter of cookies on table for those who reviewed already*
