Chapter Ten
Raoul climbed out of his bedroom window, hanging on the gutter. Unfortunately
for him, it was still light out and all the servants saw him. The butler alerted Philippe, and
much to his displeasure, he realised he would have to chase Raoul to the ball.
"Damnation! I'll never find him with all these hooligans! And that strumpet he
always hangs about. . ." He disappeared into the crowd.
Meanwhile, Erik was propping a red hat on his head and grinning like the Chesire
Cat.
"Don't I look marvellous!" he exclaimed, and examined himself from all angles
in front of the mirror. "Pretty as a picture!" He thought for a moment, and then called out,
"O Nadir! Do come and let me see how you look!"
A muffled reply was all that answered. Erik tapped his foot impatiently. "If you
don't come out this instant, I shall Punjab you!" He stomped his foot for effect.
"Fine! But only because you're paying me!" Nadir tiptoed into the drawing room
dressed as Little Bopeep. Erik burst into tears of laughter. Nadir covered himself and ran
from the room.
"I won't!" he cried.
"O yes, you will. I'm not going to miss this for anything! I'm just dying to see
how it will turn out. . ."
**************
Two dominos ran by, bumping into things and giggling wildly.
"Wow, that is strong alco- I mean chocolate!"
"Yes, what a rush! Ooh!"
"Isn't being a domino fun?" she asked.
Raoul sulked. "I'd rather be a pink domino."
"Oh phooey! You're a big baby."
Mme. Giry, dark and sober as ever, could be seen trying to restrain little Meg. She
convinced her to dance, which she did. However, when someone threw a five franc note
at her, to Giry's shock, Meg replied, "I'm not that cheap!" Meg would have received a
box to the ear if she had not run away after some fop licking her lips shrieking "Yum!"
When the half naked ballet girl ran by, Raoul's eyes bopped out of his head and
tried to grab her, but Christine slapped him hard.
"Was that . . .MEG?!" Christine screeched, while an elephant thundered past,
singing "Ubaldo! Follow moi!"
Raoul scratched his head his head. "A singing elephant. . ." he wondered aloud.
"Strange and magnificent. . ."
****
Reyer sighed crabbily. Why couldn't anyone find the secretary? And why were the
managers always holed up in their office? He came upon their closed door, when voices
stopped him.
"Yes, that's it. . ."
Reyer shuddered and barged into darkness. He turned on the gas just in time to see
Richard wiping his mouth. Armand cleared his throat loudly. Reyer tried not to notice a
large stain on his pants. "Yes?"
"Er. . .yes, you're both wanted on the grand staircase for a toast."
"Yes. . well, we will be down presently. You saw nothing, right?' Richard asked
quietly.
Reyer turned to leave. "No I didn't see you wiping your mouth and I didn't see
that large stain on Armand's pants." He closed the door behind him.
The managers appeared at the top of the staircase, grinning and each holding a
sparkling glass of champagne. Armand sported a bright blue opera cape, whilst Richard
had a purple. They were both quite drunk, but wanting to make a speech. Richard gulped
down the last of his champagne and threw it over his shoulder, not attracting anyone's
attention. He frowned and danced like a monkey, but still no one looked. Finally,
Moncharmin pointed to Richard and yelled "Get it here!"
Silence fell upon the masqueraders and all eyes turned in horror to the stairs. But
it wasn't the managers they were all looking at. It was a scarlet guest, dressed as death
himself. Richard jumped into Moncharmin's arms and shrieked, but the Red Death only
laughed mirthlessly. The crowd visibly shuddered as the Death made it's way down the
stairs and around the corner.
"Iz im! Zhe Gost! Lemme get im an I shall crush im like a leetle bug! Finally, I
shall be deeeeeeva onse moe!" shrieked a very drunk and very fat Carlotta, whilst dashing
after the Red Death.
"Uhnf!" yelled Richard when he dumped on the floor by Moncharmin. "What do
you think you're-" but was cut off by Moncharmin's speech.
"Patrons, friends. . .mostly patrons, I am honoured to have you here this evening. .
."
Richard grumbled and kicked Moncharmin in the rear.
"As you know, we've had some mishaps throughout. . ."
Moncharmin droned on while Richard got more and more jealous.
"Here, come off it, it's my turn!" shouted an ever maddening Richard. He pushed
his partner down and cleared his throat.
"I would like to have everyone's attention, please."
Armand threw down his glass and burped loudly. "Ah yes. . ."
Richard gave him a dirty look and continued. "It's been a long year. . ."
He was cut short by Armand's extreme interest in the carpet. "Ooooh. . ."
murmured Armand. Richard glared.
"As I was saying, a *very* long year. . ." Richard noticed Armand's drunken
teetering on the edge of the stair and the beginning of the imminent fall. "Oh no my
love!" he cried and grabbed the seat of Armand's pants. A loud tear filled the hall and
Armand tumbled down the stairs without his trousers. A gasp came in ensemble from the
everyone. The colour drained from both of their faces, and Armand immediately became
sober. Simultaneously, they cried, "We weren't doing anything, honestly!"
"Zhen what do you call zhis?" shrieked a very drunken elephant cracking a whip.
Mme. Giry shrieked and fainted. Reyer jumped out of the crowd shouting "I knew
it! I knew it! Hah, you owe me two thousand francs Gabriel! Yes! I'm rich!"
The managers screamed and dashed back to their office, leaving the ripped pants
behind.
In the midst of the excitement, Raoul did not notice Christine's absence. He
grabbed for a bottle of champagne and made off for a dark corner. Meanwhile, a rather
handsome Bopeep made her entrance. Reyer's eyes lit up at her sight. He quickly latched
his arm to her and they began dancing.
"How come I've never seen you around here before?" ask Reyer inquisitively.
Bopeep just shrugged her shoulders. Reyer pondered.
"You know, now that I think of it, you do look a bit familiar. . .I just can't place it.
. ."
Again Bopeep shrugged her shoulders and secretly held her breath. A stray curl
brushed her cheek and she reached her finger to twirl it back to its place, pulling a bit too
hard. The wig landed in Reyer's face, resulting in a horrified scream.
"It's a rat! Get it off me! Help!" Nadir made his get away just as Reyer peeled the
hair off his face. "Darling, were did you go?" he called in vain, but Bopeep was nowhere
to be seen. He threw the wig on the floor, not noticing what, exactly, it was. Had he only
looked, his worst fears would have been confirmed.
The Persian peeled off the dress and changed back into his normal clothes. The
man made himself known out of the crowd.
"I have a speech to make! Listen all! In honour of a new chandelier, I have
composed a little something that relates.
" ' We're all mad about there or here about and nothing at all is all we think of
and not anything. Contradiction is to the dictionary and sense and vice versa, wherever
you tend to be, in a frame of reference referring to the irrelevant in a rather relevant state
of mind, or not at all!
" 'Ever thereafter, those contradicting oxymorons are in a sane world, or at least
one that has gone mad. Nonsensical awareness is siphoned upside down by the obsolete,
whilst those counting darkness trip up the line of light dripping away from the horizon.
It's a slow race of dim-witted intellects and proper scoundrels that make the world mad.
" 'Hypocritical religious people go about like flies on jam whilst children
innocently violate rules. Is this just a red herring or am I correct? It would be quite
answerable if one knew what a red herring was.' "
He bowed and awaited for the applause that never came. Someone in the crowd
yelled, "What?!" and another "No one knows what you're talking about!"
The man frowned sadly and ran off. "Why don't they ever understand! Do I need
to speak in Persian?!"
Raoul climbed out of his bedroom window, hanging on the gutter. Unfortunately
for him, it was still light out and all the servants saw him. The butler alerted Philippe, and
much to his displeasure, he realised he would have to chase Raoul to the ball.
"Damnation! I'll never find him with all these hooligans! And that strumpet he
always hangs about. . ." He disappeared into the crowd.
Meanwhile, Erik was propping a red hat on his head and grinning like the Chesire
Cat.
"Don't I look marvellous!" he exclaimed, and examined himself from all angles
in front of the mirror. "Pretty as a picture!" He thought for a moment, and then called out,
"O Nadir! Do come and let me see how you look!"
A muffled reply was all that answered. Erik tapped his foot impatiently. "If you
don't come out this instant, I shall Punjab you!" He stomped his foot for effect.
"Fine! But only because you're paying me!" Nadir tiptoed into the drawing room
dressed as Little Bopeep. Erik burst into tears of laughter. Nadir covered himself and ran
from the room.
"I won't!" he cried.
"O yes, you will. I'm not going to miss this for anything! I'm just dying to see
how it will turn out. . ."
**************
Two dominos ran by, bumping into things and giggling wildly.
"Wow, that is strong alco- I mean chocolate!"
"Yes, what a rush! Ooh!"
"Isn't being a domino fun?" she asked.
Raoul sulked. "I'd rather be a pink domino."
"Oh phooey! You're a big baby."
Mme. Giry, dark and sober as ever, could be seen trying to restrain little Meg. She
convinced her to dance, which she did. However, when someone threw a five franc note
at her, to Giry's shock, Meg replied, "I'm not that cheap!" Meg would have received a
box to the ear if she had not run away after some fop licking her lips shrieking "Yum!"
When the half naked ballet girl ran by, Raoul's eyes bopped out of his head and
tried to grab her, but Christine slapped him hard.
"Was that . . .MEG?!" Christine screeched, while an elephant thundered past,
singing "Ubaldo! Follow moi!"
Raoul scratched his head his head. "A singing elephant. . ." he wondered aloud.
"Strange and magnificent. . ."
****
Reyer sighed crabbily. Why couldn't anyone find the secretary? And why were the
managers always holed up in their office? He came upon their closed door, when voices
stopped him.
"Yes, that's it. . ."
Reyer shuddered and barged into darkness. He turned on the gas just in time to see
Richard wiping his mouth. Armand cleared his throat loudly. Reyer tried not to notice a
large stain on his pants. "Yes?"
"Er. . .yes, you're both wanted on the grand staircase for a toast."
"Yes. . well, we will be down presently. You saw nothing, right?' Richard asked
quietly.
Reyer turned to leave. "No I didn't see you wiping your mouth and I didn't see
that large stain on Armand's pants." He closed the door behind him.
The managers appeared at the top of the staircase, grinning and each holding a
sparkling glass of champagne. Armand sported a bright blue opera cape, whilst Richard
had a purple. They were both quite drunk, but wanting to make a speech. Richard gulped
down the last of his champagne and threw it over his shoulder, not attracting anyone's
attention. He frowned and danced like a monkey, but still no one looked. Finally,
Moncharmin pointed to Richard and yelled "Get it here!"
Silence fell upon the masqueraders and all eyes turned in horror to the stairs. But
it wasn't the managers they were all looking at. It was a scarlet guest, dressed as death
himself. Richard jumped into Moncharmin's arms and shrieked, but the Red Death only
laughed mirthlessly. The crowd visibly shuddered as the Death made it's way down the
stairs and around the corner.
"Iz im! Zhe Gost! Lemme get im an I shall crush im like a leetle bug! Finally, I
shall be deeeeeeva onse moe!" shrieked a very drunk and very fat Carlotta, whilst dashing
after the Red Death.
"Uhnf!" yelled Richard when he dumped on the floor by Moncharmin. "What do
you think you're-" but was cut off by Moncharmin's speech.
"Patrons, friends. . .mostly patrons, I am honoured to have you here this evening. .
."
Richard grumbled and kicked Moncharmin in the rear.
"As you know, we've had some mishaps throughout. . ."
Moncharmin droned on while Richard got more and more jealous.
"Here, come off it, it's my turn!" shouted an ever maddening Richard. He pushed
his partner down and cleared his throat.
"I would like to have everyone's attention, please."
Armand threw down his glass and burped loudly. "Ah yes. . ."
Richard gave him a dirty look and continued. "It's been a long year. . ."
He was cut short by Armand's extreme interest in the carpet. "Ooooh. . ."
murmured Armand. Richard glared.
"As I was saying, a *very* long year. . ." Richard noticed Armand's drunken
teetering on the edge of the stair and the beginning of the imminent fall. "Oh no my
love!" he cried and grabbed the seat of Armand's pants. A loud tear filled the hall and
Armand tumbled down the stairs without his trousers. A gasp came in ensemble from the
everyone. The colour drained from both of their faces, and Armand immediately became
sober. Simultaneously, they cried, "We weren't doing anything, honestly!"
"Zhen what do you call zhis?" shrieked a very drunken elephant cracking a whip.
Mme. Giry shrieked and fainted. Reyer jumped out of the crowd shouting "I knew
it! I knew it! Hah, you owe me two thousand francs Gabriel! Yes! I'm rich!"
The managers screamed and dashed back to their office, leaving the ripped pants
behind.
In the midst of the excitement, Raoul did not notice Christine's absence. He
grabbed for a bottle of champagne and made off for a dark corner. Meanwhile, a rather
handsome Bopeep made her entrance. Reyer's eyes lit up at her sight. He quickly latched
his arm to her and they began dancing.
"How come I've never seen you around here before?" ask Reyer inquisitively.
Bopeep just shrugged her shoulders. Reyer pondered.
"You know, now that I think of it, you do look a bit familiar. . .I just can't place it.
. ."
Again Bopeep shrugged her shoulders and secretly held her breath. A stray curl
brushed her cheek and she reached her finger to twirl it back to its place, pulling a bit too
hard. The wig landed in Reyer's face, resulting in a horrified scream.
"It's a rat! Get it off me! Help!" Nadir made his get away just as Reyer peeled the
hair off his face. "Darling, were did you go?" he called in vain, but Bopeep was nowhere
to be seen. He threw the wig on the floor, not noticing what, exactly, it was. Had he only
looked, his worst fears would have been confirmed.
The Persian peeled off the dress and changed back into his normal clothes. The
man made himself known out of the crowd.
"I have a speech to make! Listen all! In honour of a new chandelier, I have
composed a little something that relates.
" ' We're all mad about there or here about and nothing at all is all we think of
and not anything. Contradiction is to the dictionary and sense and vice versa, wherever
you tend to be, in a frame of reference referring to the irrelevant in a rather relevant state
of mind, or not at all!
" 'Ever thereafter, those contradicting oxymorons are in a sane world, or at least
one that has gone mad. Nonsensical awareness is siphoned upside down by the obsolete,
whilst those counting darkness trip up the line of light dripping away from the horizon.
It's a slow race of dim-witted intellects and proper scoundrels that make the world mad.
" 'Hypocritical religious people go about like flies on jam whilst children
innocently violate rules. Is this just a red herring or am I correct? It would be quite
answerable if one knew what a red herring was.' "
He bowed and awaited for the applause that never came. Someone in the crowd
yelled, "What?!" and another "No one knows what you're talking about!"
The man frowned sadly and ran off. "Why don't they ever understand! Do I need
to speak in Persian?!"
