Fukai Mori
Chapter 5: Decisions, decisions
loupgarou7(loupgarou72@hotmail.com)



ack!!! GOMEN NASAI, Blue Angel (And thanx too ^_^ Grr...I was in such a bad mood till I read your review)!!! God, I know
I'm so confusing...Ok, I might as well just say it. If you look in past chapters there are certain scenes distinguished
by double asterisk lines (if I didn't screw anything up). Basically those sequences are 'special' (i.e. Usagi's sleeping
or unconscious during them). In these sequences there are 3 characters, the girl, the woman youkai, and the guy youkai.
Does that clarify anything??? Sorry I guess I shoud've just said it straight out from the start...

*Sob* SweetKawaiiAngel!!! I LUV U!!! Someone ACTUALLY remembers Pure Snow! yup! I'm going to work to revive the deleted
Pure Snow!!! WAII!!! That reminds me!!! Fushigi Yuugi Eikou Den OVA3's coming out!!! We'll just see how that affects
Pure Snow *~ (This whole thing was written before the intro to Pure Snow chpt 17 *^-^*)

Anyway Thanx to all faithful fans who aren't disgusted with my inactivity!!! I LUV U GUYS!!! Yosh! I'm going to write
3 chapters today!!!...or that's what I say anyway...-_-'

On another note, didn't the text on the last chapter look horrifyingly ugly??? I hope this chapter doesn't come out the
same way...

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"I want you to kill Sesshoumaru."

A chilling wind swept across the field, and Usagi shivered drawing her yukata closer to her. What was he talking about?
He KNEW Sesshoumaru? She was so confused. In this world nothing was what it appeared to be. Sesshoumaru and now him had
proved that to her well enough. Suddenly in the midst of her rapid mental scrambling to find out what was going on something
clicked. Clutching the daggar by the handle, she raised her face up to the red moon and laughed.

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"I have to go, even more so than before!" Hotaru attempted to break loose from his grip.

"But, Hotaru-hime! What just happened?" He took hold of her shoulders his steadfast voice breaking through her frantic
hysteria.

"Gomen nasai, Akira-san. I took your food, your bed, and your precious book, but right now I have to go somewhere. My
friend's in danger. I have to go." Hotaru said softly, and her lithe body trembled under his hands.

"Then, may I come as well?"

Hotaru looked at him sharply. "It will be dangerous. You may die."

"It doesn't matter. As long as you are safe."

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"Pluto?" Charon questioned.

"What is it?"

"When will you stop causing her this pain? Can't you see she's suffering? I dont want to see the Princess go through this."

"I know, Charon," Pluto murmured, "I know all too well how you feel?"

"Then why don't you stop? Take back time, Pluto. Please! It would've been better if this had never happened! It would've
been better if you had disposed of that youkai then!"

"I know that!" Pluto snapped finally and she turned on Charon her eyes flashing, "Don't you think I've suffered for letting
that boy live? Once I realized I should've killed him it was too late. Killing him would've altered the destiny of another
half-youkai. Even now we're in too deep. Killing him by our bare hands may be the only good thing that we can do, but
before that, she must remember?"

"She hasn't remembered up to now! What makes you think she will in the midst of battle?" Charon argued her frustration
taking form in tears welling up in her eyes.

"She won't be in the midst of battle. She'll remember. Don't worry. When she loses everything, she'll remember." Charon
grudgingly accepted this answer too weary to go back to talking about how she shouldn't be suffering.

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Her horrible laugh echoed throughout the night. Sora took a step back his face etched in surprise and malice. Was it her
laugh? Was the ugly cackling so full of bitterness truly her laugh? Was the grating sound from her sweet, scarlet lips?
But that wasn't what was on her mind right now.

How could she have been so blind? Because of her strong attraction to his looks, she had completely ignored asking herself
why he was so strongly attracted to her. Of course there was a motive behind it. She had been such a naive fool, playing
right into the palm of his hand, but she laughed. Why? "Just a weak will man. You know you can't beat him, so you want me
to because you know you can't beat him? God, I hate men like you who leave others to do their dirty work." Was this her
voice? Were these her words?

"You don't understand!" he cried out desperately, "You don't know what that bastard Sesshoumaru did to me. He slaughtered
my family, my village, and my finacee and decimated my village! You can't see how evil he is because you..."

Pity. She should feel pity. So why weren't any coming out?

He continued on, "I understand now. He's put you under some youkai spell. In that case I'll purge you of it now!" He drew
from behind him a sword and charged at her.

Usagi quickly swept away the hair blown in her face by the wind and ran to meet him head on with her daggar. Raising the
sword high above his head, he slashed it down in an arc. In an instant she was behind him with the daggar pressed to his
throat. "Too easy. I could see that coming a mile away. If you're going to fight with a sword, you might has well learn
how to use it," she said simply.

"You..." he whispered struggling not to let his neck be cut by the blade by his talking, "You still have humanity left
inside you or else you would've killed me by now. Listen to me, he's just using you-"

He was cut off as she pressed the blade against his neck drawing a fine line of blood. "If I recall correctly," she hissed,
"the only person who tried to use me for their own purposes was you."

"Kill him." They both turned in direction of the voice. Sesshoumaru stood at the top of the field stoical as always but
with his claws beared. "Kill him," he repeated.

A human. She had never killed a human. But...Beryl had felt, too. All her enemies had felt pain, joy, despair, and possibly
love. It was true what youkai were attempting to achieve was mistaken, but....there were humans whose evil deeds would
make youkai's pale in comparison. There were people who dispite their unspeakably horrible acts would never face
punishment their sins locked up inside. At least youkai were honest with themselves. Her body moved before she was
finished thinking. Shifting the daggar to the left, her hand was prepared to slice across his throat when...


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As she came upon the field, her breath caught in her throat. By the positioning of her body, Hotaru knew Usagi would do it.
Kill a human. Her sweetly smiling Usagi-san had gone this far. "USAGI-SAN! STOP!!!" she ran ahead leaving Akira behind.
Usagi, startled by her sudden presence, dropped the daggar as Sora scrambled away from her grasp. "Usagi-san! Bellona,
she's not who-"

The sentence was cut off in Hotaru's throat however as from Usagi's body black energy pulled out violently and Usagi
fell to the ground. A low cackling filled the field as the energy slowly began to merge in the sky above Usagi in a
distinctly human form which observed the field carefully.

"Usagi..." Hotaru heard a hoarse whisper carried by the wind. She whipped her head fiercely in his direction, glaring
at him seethingly.

"It's your fault," she said, "If you had never..." She drew her breath, "It's your fault Usagi-san's like this! It's
your fault!" she shouted. A child, she realized, she was acting like a child pointing fingers, looking for someone to
blame, but she didn't care. Even if she knew what she was doing, it didn't matter. She _was_ a child, currently scared
to death because her friend had been overtaken by an evil spirit, but even more terror-stricken by the fact that the
youkai before her eyes had changed her gentle friend so drastically.

He wrenched his eyes away from the dark figure and stared back coldly at her. "Is this really the time to be doing this?"

He cared, she realized. He cared about Usagi enough to be thinking only about her when Hotaru was insulting him. When
had this happened. She had suspected feelings on the other end, but Sesshoumaru she hadn't even thought to be capable
of feelings.

The being spoke finally. "So, you've come here now that you know who I am, Princess of Saturn. You should've stayed
where you were.

"USAGI-SAN!!!!!!"

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Hotaru's scream for her echoed inside the dark space where she floated allowing herself to be swallowed up in the
dark immensity. "Hotaru.." Usagi's eyes glazed over. "I'm so sorry you're in pain, but I want to stay here."
Silent tears streamed down her cheeks before she curled up in a ball letting her face rest between her knees.
"If I just stay here, I won't be able to hurt anyone again. If I just stay here, this pain in my heart will
go away soon. If I just stay here, then I won't have to face him anymore..."

Suddenly, inside her mind something flickered. There was another time, so long ago, when she had been like this.
When was it? What had happened? Like trying to forcefully grab water only to have it slip through your fingers,
the more she tried to remember the more she began to doubt that it had happened. It was only when she relaxed
that she was overtaken my memories. Memories of a life and love long buried by an ancient spell combined with
Princess Serenity's own willingness to forget.

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"Akira." Hotaru's voice croaked as she reached out. He was falling. Before her he was falling taking the blast
that she should have. Taking the blast that she had been too slow to dodge. "Akira." She lay a hand on his prone
body shaking him gently. "Akira, I never told you right? I can heal. Just hold on. Hold on." As she placed her
hands over him and attempted to begin her healing, dread seized her. It wasn't right. Something wasn't right.
She forced her eyes to look beyond his still body. A river of blood flowed downhill steadily from his body glinting
in the bright moonlight.

"He's dead," A voice whispered harshly in her ear, "We need to regroup. We need...Usagi!" Sesshoumaru's sharp
exclamation made Hotaru raise her tear filled eyes only to be blinded by the intense white light. An unearthly
shreik. Silence. Hotaru painfully forced her eyes open peering through the fog of light at a figure. She knew it
well enough. No longer Usagi, but the outline of Serenity in her royal court dress alone on the bottom of the
hill, Bellona nowhere in sight. A strangled gasp came from Sesshoumaru, and Hotaru turned her head briefly
awed by the sight of the apathetic youkai's face in a state of astonishment.

"Gomen ne, Sesshoumaru." Her delicate sweet voice carried itself through the air as the light began to dim.
"Gomen ne for leaving you alone all these years."





And the final revalation!!! next chapter.