Part 19
"Stop! Dammit, stop"
After running in circles for at least four blocks, hoping that something familiar would trigger her memory and point her in the right direction, Buffy reluctantly admitted defeat. It was useless. Her poor excuse for a memory wouldn't play fair and even though she'd been born in this small town, and supposedly lived here all of her life, it made no difference. In her present state of mind, and just four blocks from home, the troubled young woman was completely lost.
Feeling bitter, angry and frustrated, only one thought kept Buffy searching. Sadly, she was almost certain that Liam knew exactly where Crawford Street was and from the look on his face, her enraged husband could be carrying out his threat against William Pennington's at that very second.
**Don't worry about it, Buffy.. This time I'll kill him**
**I promised that bastard if he ever went near you again it would be the sorriest day of his life**
Feeling the panic in her stomach start to spread like a forest fire, burning out of control, Buffy knew she had to do something and she had to do it fast. With every wasted minute that swirled past her, the prospect of stopping the violence between the two men in her life grew less likely.
**Two men in her life? **
As the words throbbed inside her brain, Buffy's head began to hurt.
Deep inside her mind forgotten memories were surging to reach through the black abyss that kept them trapped. Fragments of her lost life teased and tormented her as they fought to return home, and the more she questioned her past, the more she knew she was being lied to.
Tiny flashes from somewhere deep inside her subconscious continually echoed that there was only one man in her life. Only one love had ever reached out and truly touched her heart.
**But was it William or Liam?**
**William Pennington is nothing but a stalker. He made your life hell for weeks**
Liam's angry voice broke through her thoughts, but only to be counter attacked by Will's.
** When you finally come to your senses, you'll remember that I love you much more than he *ever* did, and when he breaks your heart again**
More confused than ever, Buffy struggled with the two faces dancing before her eyes.
William was, rich, good-looking and he seemed genuinely found of her. But it felt wrong. There was something missing with this man, heat - fire. There was simply no spark when he kissed her.
Liam on the other hand was a different story. He not only sparked; he sent shock waves of electricity right through her body. He held the missing element. When Liam touched her skin he set her blood on fire. Buffy still couldn't remember falling in love with the man she had married, but if she really searched her heart, she didn't need her memories to know the answer. She belonged to Liam. She didn't have a past and until it returned her present was stuck in limbo but when Buffy thought of the future, if she was truly honest with herself, all she could see was Liam. All she wanted was Liam.
**But would he still want her? After this night was over would he be the one leaving this time?**
As her thoughts snapped back to the present, and to the look on Liam's face when he first heard that William was back, Buffy knew she was wasting precious time. She had to find both the mansion and Pennington before Liam did... For all their sakes.
**If only these streets didn't all look the same**
Turing her head one last time for inspiration, a flash of blurring yellow on the horizon answered her prayers.
**She might not remember the way to the mansion but there were others that did**
Stepping off the sidewalk, Buffy stood in the middle of the road and holding out both of her small arms she waved frantically, forcing the approaching taxi to stop in its tracks. With a slight screech of rubber tyres the car came to an abrupt halt and the bald headed driver shook his head in amazement as he glared out of the side window.
"Lady, have you got a serious death wish or something?" Charles Gunn demanded as he watched the small blonde waif step closer to his cab. It was his last run of the night and the last thing he needed was to hit a pedestrian, especially a crazy one.
Relieved that the car had stopped for her, Buffy was too immersed in her own troubles to notice the sarcasm in the driver's voice. Her only concern was getting to William Pennington's house as quickly as possible and putting an end to the nightmare that had taken over her life. Her first priority was stopping any bloodshed, but while she was heading in that direction, Buffy also knew there was a second reason for seeking out the English poet. She was no longer taking *no* for an answer.
With the two men in the same room, if Liam couldn't or wouldn't fill in the lost pieces of the puzzle, then maybe William would. And if they didn't, maybe it was time to make them...
**That's if they hadn't killed each other first **
"Hey! Do you want a cab or not?" The rich masculine voice of the driver broke her out of reverie.
Leaning forward, Buffy peered into the side window and gratefully nodded her head.
"I need to get to Crawford Street. I'm looking for a mansion " She asked as she flung open the car door and after closing it behind her, dropped wearily into the back seat. "Please, as quickly as possible"
"Sure, I know the place you want. That's where that poet lives. My wife reads his work all the time. A bit hearts and flowers for my taste but she likes it" The driver chatted happily as he pulled back out into the road. Although it was getting dark, he was surprised the girl needed a cab, it was such a short distance and every person in Sunnydale knew where the English writer lived. After all, how many celebrities were there in Sunnydale?
Raising his eyes to his mirror, Charles Gunn studied his passenger sitting quietly in the back seat. She was an extremely attractive young woman, although a little on the thin side if he was honest, but it wasn't her looks that caught his attention. The girl's eyes were so troubled, the sad hazel orbs almost looked haunted.
Turning on to main Street Charles tried to strike up a conversation.
"I guess you must be new in town" He asked, not believing a local wouldn't know where Crawford street was.
Buffy was looking out of the window at the passing houses, at the question she sighed sadly.
"I've been away for a while, I guess my memory's not what it used to be" She tried to act calmly but the tension in her voice wasn't missed on either of them.
" Don't worry, It's not that far, we'll be there in less than ten minutes"
"Good... That's good." Buffy turned her head away from the window as her gallery flashed past and closed her eyes.
It seemed the longest ten minutes of her life...
*****
Crawford street, it turned out, was just on the outskirts of town and much to Buffy's surprise, it seemed that every person in Sunnydale knew of William Pennington and the large mansion he kept on in Sunnydale. Everyone that was except her.
The journey seemed to last forever and as the cab turned down the impressive street in question, Buffy's eyes nervously flicked from one large building to the next, hoping that one of them would jump out at her and shout its recognition. In the end she didn't need to be told that they had arrived. When the car pulled up in front of the most impressive building in Sunnydale, Buffy went cold. Looming up out of the dark night, the cold gray structure seemed to whisper out her name from every nook and cranny.
"This is Pennington's place, but it doesn't look like anyone's at home" the driver said offering his opinion as he glanced up at the tall building, blanketed in total darkness.
This part of town was so isolated; he didn't like the idea of leaving the young woman all alone. There was something very vulnerable about the small blonde girl in the back seat of his cab and the thought of leaving her stranded went against his better judgement.
"I can wait for you if you want" Charles asked over his shoulder.
Buffy smiled her gratitude but refused the kind offer. "Thanks, but I'll be fine"
Climbing from the cab, she watched the taillights disappear back up the street, and turning towards the mansion, Buffy shivered and felt the small hairs on the back of her neck stand on end. There was something evil about this house. At one time in her life this house had caused her intense pain.
**And you want to go right back inside? Great idea** Buffy tried to reason with herself about going inside, but she already knew she would lose that argument.
**Liam's inside that house. Liam, William Pennington and the secrets from my past.. **
It didn't matter how afraid she was; there was no going back..
*****
Climbing the stone steps that lead to the front door, Buffy took a deep breath and felt a needed rush of adrenaline wash through her tired body. She was through with all the lies, all the bullshit she had been spun since she'd first woken into this nightmare of a world. It was time to take charge of her life and stop being the victim. It was time to fight fire with fire and at that very moment Buffy realised that maybe it was time she used a few dirty tricks of her own.
**You just left, Buffy. You didn't give me the chance to understand. You. Just. Left. **
If what Liam had told her was true, he couldn't help her; so, she would just have to help herself.
On reaching the top step, the first signs that Liam had reached the mansion before her was clearly obvious. The large front door was left ajar and as Buffy pushed it open and walked in, she immediately noticed the sound of broken glass snap crisply beneath her small feet.
**Oh God, Liam. What have i done**
Buffy felt her stomach nosedive and it took every ounce of strength she had, not to turn around and run as far away from the house as possible. Only the knowledge that if she did run, it wouldn't just be from the house stopped her. Buffy knew if she didn't confront her demons now she wouldn't stop running until she could never be found again.
As a vision of soft brown, enigmatic eyes rose up and teased her memory, she finally accepted that she didn't want to run any longer. She wanted answers. Straight answers. What ever happened next she was finally taking back her life.
"Hello?.." Buffy waited for a second but there was no reply. Only faint echoes of her own voice accompanied her footsteps.
"Liam?" She called out louder this time but received the same response.
Continuing to walk through the impressive hallway, the sound of shattered glass was the only noise that broke the eerie stillness. The hall was in darkness but even still, Buffy couldn't fail to notice other telltale signs of a fight. On noticing a splintered table blocking her path a sliver of fear crept slowly up her spine.
**This was all her fault and if Liam was hurt...** Buffy shut that thought down as quickly as it flashed through her head. The thought of her husband suffering pain because he thought she was an unfaithful bitch was more than she could bear.
"Maybe I should reconsider that running away option again" Buffy tried to joke but it fell flat.
Following the trail of damage, she eventually noticed a small glow coming from under a door at the far end of the hall.
With a small push the large door opened without a sound. Buffy stopped dead still in the doorway and peered inside.
The room was beautiful. Heavy drapes hung across all the windows and although the only light in the room came from a small over turned lamp, the uninvited guest had little difficulty making out the lone figure, leaning drunkenly against one wall at the far end of the sitting room.
As she stood in the doorway William Pennington made no attempt to look up. His thoughts were far too immersed in the bottle of bourbon that was happily slipping down his throat, trying to numb the burning pain that shot behind his bruised eyes.
His whole body ached but that wasn't the pain William was trying to wipe out. He had been so close, so bloody close to taking Buffy away from that bastard Angelus that he could almost taste it. But suddenly it didn't taste so sweet. It wasn't supposed to have happened this way. When Darla had first asked him to help her get rid of Liam's wife it had all seemed so simple. He wasn't supposed to care about her, just break them apart.
**That stupid bitch of a sister should have warned me. ** William inwardly cursed as he once again raised the bottle to his lips and tried to numb the pain in his heart.
** Nothing about Buffy Angelus was simple, she had away of getting into a man's blood and once under his skin, there was no way of getting free.**
For the first time in his life, William was hopelessly in love and there was nothing he wouldn't do to keep her.
The fight had been wonderful; Liam had played right into his hands and as soon as his bruises were at their best, he would put a call into the cops and have the loser arrested.
At the though of Buffy's husband behind bars and finally out of his hair, Will smiled. It was at that point that he felt her presence.
"William.. " Buffy's spoke quietly but made no attempt to enter the room.
Lifting his head to the sound of her voice, he didn't answer at first; he just let his eyes drink in the contours of her face.
Under such an intense gaze Buffy felt her cheeks flush and her throat go dry. On closer inspection, the room was a real mess. As her eyes scanned the damage, Will's head turned a fraction and the light from the lamp lit up the full extent of his beating. Both his eyes were beginning to swell and there was a thin line of blood smeared beneath nose, which by the shape of it was possibly broken.
"Oh, God.. Are you all right?" With the shock of seeing the good looking face, battered and bruised almost beyond recognition, Buffy took her first steps into the room.
Yet again broken glass cracked beneath her feet.
At this second question William shook his head, slightly amused at her concern. At the sudden movement a searing pain shot through his battered body and he quickly lifted the bottle he was still holding to his split lips and knocked back what was left of the contents. The cool amber liquid burned with a welcome fire as it slid effortlessly down the back of his throat, but even though most of the alcohol was now swimming happily through his blood stream, it so far hadn't numbed the pain.
"I hope your husband knows a good defence lawyer, he's certainly going to need one"
William looked up and his hungry gaze bore directly into Buffy's eyes. For an instant, she felt an unreasonable tremor of fear flutter through her body but it was quickly pushed a side.
"I think it's safe to say Liam has that covered" Refusing to let herself feel intimidated, Buffy's voice hid her fear well.
As she studied the damage her husband had left on the younger man's face, strangely, her first thought was for Liam's safety.
** Liam might be an excellent attorney but If Pennington pressed assault charges against him...** Buffy tried not to think of the consequences. Trying to ignore the deep purple swellings now covering what had earlier been a devilishly handsome face, she tried to change the subject.
"You told me we were lovers.. I want to know why you lied to me."
"I never lied to you, pet."
Buffy didn't move.
"Angelus got to you, didn't he?" Pulling away from the wall, William snorted in disgust.
Buffy still didn't move, although her heart was beating so hard she thought that it would break her chest she stood her ground.
"He's a clever sod, I'll give him that much" William spat a mouthful of blood towards the floor and dropped the bottle he was holding into the nearest chair.
"It never crossed your mind that he's the one telling the lies. No, you'd rather believe what that smarmy bastard fed you than follow your own heart" Shoving his hands in the front pockets of his tight, faded jeans, Will slowly sauntered forward.
As the tall, slim figure moved through the dim light, Buffy tried not to notice how his jeans sheathed his lean hips or how his white T-shirt hugged his well-developed chest. Tilting her head slightly, their eyes met and for a second she almost swore she saw a flicker of despair in his penetrating gaze, but only for a second. When she looked again it was quickly replaced with an arrogant gleam.
**Sexy, arrogant bastard**
Even on the wrong end of a severe beating William Pennington looked hot, but no matter how much sex appeal he radiated, Buffy didn't feel the attraction. Even with amnesia she knew he wasn't her type
**He's wasn't Liam**
**You'd rather believe what that smarmy bastard fed you than follow your own heart**
"But that's where you're wrong. It's my heart that knows you're lying." Buffy snapped back the reply with cool certainty.
William laughed
"Am I? And why would I lie Buffy?" he asked as his hungry eyes slid insolently down the full length of her body. She was still wearing her new dress and it was having the same effect on him as it had earlier worked on Angel
Buffy stood frozen to the spot as William continued to close the distance between them. As his tall lean body moved ever closer the air between them seemed to crackle. Anticipation, fear, love, hate. The emotions being exchanged between the two of them with each new step were almost tangible.
"Someone is lying to me" Feeling uncomfortable by his closeness, Buffy tried to retreat but her progress was stopped as she felt her back hit the cold wall
"Like I said before, why would *I* lie? You might not remember yet but when you do you'll know that you belong to me, Buffy. You love me" William's grin was so smug Buffy would have given anything at that moment to knock it right off his face.
Coming to a stand still Will placed his hands on each side of her body, trapping her small frame up against the wall. He leaned forward, his nose nearly touching hers. Buffy swallowed, she could almost taste the alcohol on his breath, as she took a nervous breath, she could smell his blood
"Trust me, pet. I'm the good guy here"
He was teasing her now and his eyes glinted seductively as his body pressed even closer.
Buffy nervously bit into her bottom lip.
"I don't believe.. " she didn't get a chance to finish her sentence. William grabbed her; his long slim fingers gripping her thin arms so tightly they bruised the delicate flesh. Buffy struggled but before she could breakaway he clamped his hot mouth over her lips and kissed her with a desire so passionate that the girl in his arms almost forgot how to breathe.
"Buffy. Oh, God, Buffy." William whispered fiercely as time after time, his hungry mouth tore at her lips
Caught completely off guard, Buffy's mind whirled as her blood pumped wildly through her veins. The kiss was rough, almost violent and as William groaned deep in his throat, his arms tightened around Buffy's slim shoulders pulling her body into his. The kiss grew more intense but even as Buffy's heart thundered against her ribs she knew that it wasn't passion she was feeling.... The kiss was wrong, in every way possible it was wrong.
This man could never have been her lover; he didn't come near to touching her heart the way Liam always did. He might be touching her body but he could never reach inside her soul. William Pennington was a fraud, a liar and that was the truth. She didn't know if it was a just a gut feeling or a lost memory trying to break through, but she knew it was the truth.
**This man wasn't the reason you left Angel**
With the realisation set in stone, Buffy finally yanked her head away. Her large hazel eyes flashing with emotion
"Let go of me. It's not you, it was never you"
For a moment only the sound of hard breathing separated them. In an instant, the temperature in the room seemed to drop to freezing and both occupants knew their lives would never be the same again.
"It was never you" Buffy whispered again as she fought to control her breathing.
The harsh words stuck home and stole every vestige of colour from the blonde man's cheeks. Standing in the dim light, his skin took on the deadly white appearance of the dead.
"Your memory's returned" It was a statement, not a question. One glance at the fire in her hazel eyes told him without doubt that the deception was over.
Buffy just continued to glare and played her own charade for all she was worth. Whatever happened next, she knew it would once again change her life forever.
For the longest moment of William Pennington's life there was no sound in the room.
If he were completely honest with himself he would have admitted that her kiss had already told him everything he needed to know. She didn't love him, even in a complete state of amnesia Buffy couldn't return the feelings his heart overflowed with and, now that she remembered her past, she would never be his. It was over.
The bluff was called and he had lost.
Fooled into believing that the woman he adored now knew who really was lying, William felt his happiness slide away. He'd always known the game he and Darla were playing was dangerous. There was always a strong possibility that Buffy would remember their so-called love affair was only in his head, but it was a chance he accepted willingly. Stretching the truth a little or even a lot if he got the girl of his dreams wasn't a problem. And it had almost worked. Just a few more days and the Angelus' marriage would have been destroyed forever. The look on the old sod's face that night had told him that much. Liam Angelus had walked from his house a shattered man.
** If only the bloody amnesia had lasted a few more days**
Cursing under his breath, and knowing he had nothing left to lose William took a step towards Buffy.
"I might have lied about our affair, Buffy, but it doesn't change how I feel about you." He started softly and nervously ran his hand across his bruised jaw.
Buffy moved away from the wall, but as the realisation of William's deceit sank in, her anger started to spin out of control. Thinking she was being lied to was one thing but hearing somebody admit that they had purposely tried to ruin her life was very different.
"Oh God, I was right, it was you all the time. Everything you told me was a lie... I almost believed you"
Too late, William realised his mistake. Buffy hadn't remembered her past at all. She had played him for a fool and he had let her trick a confession from his stupid mouth.
**Fuck it**
At the look of horror that crossed her beautiful features, Will quickly tried to justify his actions.
"I only did it because I love you, Buffy. You have no idea what it's like watching you, day after day, being so unhappy. I've had this ache in my chest ever since the first second I saw you. You were in so much pain...The way he treated you.. I just wanted to save you " William's jaw tightened and his skin drew tight across his chiselled cheekbones.
Holding on to the back of a chair for support, Buffy closed her eyes as a single tear slipped beneath her dark lashes..
"I love you" He tried to reach for her but she pushed his hand away.
"You bastard. You low-life lying bastard. I've been in hell for the last two weeks and all the time you could have ended it. That was when you could have saved me " Buffy cried out as the pain and confusion trapped inside her head exploded. She wasn't a cheat or a liar. He was.
To her surprise, William started to laugh but there was no humour in the cold sound
" You're not the only one, luv. I've been in Hell now for the last two years. I didn't want to fall in love with you. I knew it was wrong, but I had no choice. You're in my gut, in my throat, I'm drowning in you Summers, I'm drowning in you" Before she could move further away, William's fingers clamped around her wrists, once again pulling her body up hard against his chest.
" Just give me a chance to explain"
Leaning his face close to her ear, Will's hot breath washed over her cold skin in shuddering waves.
"No" Buffy gasped
She tried pulling her hands free but his long fingers bit deep into her flesh.
"Stop fighting me, I won't hurt you"
"You already have"
"Please..."
Buffy refused to listen as renewed anger burned through her veins.
"After what you've put me through there's nothing you could say that I would believe. I could never love a man like you..." She raised her head and stared straight into his cool, dangerous eyes.
William smirked, but her next three words cut right through his heart and shattered the four beating chambers into a million shards.
"You're beneath me"
Pennington jerked as if she had physically slapped him but continued to grip both her small wrists in his large fingers.
"You bitch. You bloody bitch.. I'll show you who's beneath who"
Before Buffy could move, the handsome features facing her changed into an almost unrecognisable mask of fury. With a violent jerk, once again Will's lips firmly moulded over her mouth. Gasping in horror, Buffy tried to break free, but he was too strong. Continuing to struggle, hot tears of anger welled up in her eyes but it was only when she tasted blood in her mouth, where his teeth had bitten into her lower lip did she finally find the strength to push away
"Let. Me. Go. " The sound of her voice sent a chill right through the room.
Still locked within the circle of William's strong arms Buffy glared at him with stormy green eyes
"Buffy, please" William pleaded as he tried desperately to hold onto the struggling girl's wrists. The situation was getting out of control and he had to try and make her see sense.
Buffy was now beyond listening to anything he said. Her bruised lips throbbed and her wrists stung with the pressure of his finger.
"Get the fuck off me" Without another word, Buffy kicked out her foot and nailed his shin as hard as she could.
"Bloody Hell" William jerked back in shock, releasing Buffy's wrist at the same time. For a second, a look of sheer disbelief flashed across his face but it was quickly dropped. Knowing that he had burnt all his bridges the handsome young man's heavy shoulders finally sagged in defeat and he stepped back.
" You bastard, I could have you arrested for this" Buffy's voice was so quiet he almost missed the threat.
When she lifted her hand to her mouth and ran her trembling fingers across her swollen lips, William sighed, letting out a deep ragged breath.
"For what its worth.. I'm sorry"
Even as the words slipped over his lips he knew in his heart that he wasn't sorry for lying, just sorry it hadn't worked.
Not wanting to stay in the same room as Pennington for another second, Buffy shook her head and turned to walk away, but as she went to walk out the door, she stopped.
"Just answer me one question honestly.... Darla... Darla told me the same story... Why? " That was the one part of this charade that Buffy still didn't understand. Darla had almost convinced her that William was telling the truth.
At the sound of his sister's name, William suddenly saw one last spark of hope. As long as Buffy thought it was only him plotting against her, Darla still had a chance to break them wide apart. Buffy might hate him at the moment but if she thought Liam was screwing Darla, maybe, just maybe he could still save something from this disaster. It worked like a charm the last time they had tried it. Buffy was so angry she ran all the way to New York. As long as she still had amnesia there was no reason it wouldn't work again.
William inwardly smiled. If he couldn't have Buffy he would do everything in his power to make sure that Liam never could.
Turning his head he let his eyes shadow with guilt.
"Don't blame Darla, she's my sister and she believed what I told her. Darla has nothing to do with any of this "Even as the lie was growing William started to feel that there was still a chance. Darla would save the day; she always was the stronger sibling.
**Besides, she had got him into this fucking mess in the first place**
Lowering his eyes and looking as sad and pathetic as he possibly could, the young poet was already working out his next move. He took a slow breath, fighting to keep his tone as level as possible.
" Tell your *husband* I won't be pressing charges" Will rubbed the large purple swelling that covered his jaw and winced slightly with the pain. There was still a hint of bitterness in his voice but that couldn't be helped. After all, he was a poet not a bloody actor.
Relieved that Liam wouldn't get in trouble, Buffy nodded. She still wasn't sure if she believed William, especially the part about his sister not knowing, but when her gaze finally settled on his battered face all she could read was pain in the depths of his troubled eyes. Pain and a deep sadness.
Moving through the doorway Buffy realised that she still had so many questions unanswered but now was not the time or the place to ask them. Taking one final look at the man who had tried to destroy her marriage, she left William Pennington with a final shot.
"Maybe its time you took a trip back to the mother country.. And stayed there"
******
William dragged his bruised body up the stairs and headed straight for the bathroom. As he switched on the light he caught his reflection in the mirror and winced. Both eyes were now nothing more than swollen slits and the best part of his jaw was purple. It was definitely not one of his better nights. Turning on the shower spray, Will kicked off his boots, carefully pulled his blood splattered T-shirt over his head and dropped his jeans on the bathroom floor. His face was a mess, his dreams of a life with Buffy were in ruins and there was no hot water.
Stepping under the spray the water was ice cold and it stung. Sharp needles attacked his bruised flesh but in his present state of mind William didn't care. It was a welcome distraction. Closing his eyes, he leant against the cold tiles and as the icy water washed over his body he let all thoughts of Buffy wash over his mind. Tomorrow, first thing he would call Darla. She would know what to do. Darla would make it right, she always did.
TBC... In about a week :)
"Stop! Dammit, stop"
After running in circles for at least four blocks, hoping that something familiar would trigger her memory and point her in the right direction, Buffy reluctantly admitted defeat. It was useless. Her poor excuse for a memory wouldn't play fair and even though she'd been born in this small town, and supposedly lived here all of her life, it made no difference. In her present state of mind, and just four blocks from home, the troubled young woman was completely lost.
Feeling bitter, angry and frustrated, only one thought kept Buffy searching. Sadly, she was almost certain that Liam knew exactly where Crawford Street was and from the look on his face, her enraged husband could be carrying out his threat against William Pennington's at that very second.
**Don't worry about it, Buffy.. This time I'll kill him**
**I promised that bastard if he ever went near you again it would be the sorriest day of his life**
Feeling the panic in her stomach start to spread like a forest fire, burning out of control, Buffy knew she had to do something and she had to do it fast. With every wasted minute that swirled past her, the prospect of stopping the violence between the two men in her life grew less likely.
**Two men in her life? **
As the words throbbed inside her brain, Buffy's head began to hurt.
Deep inside her mind forgotten memories were surging to reach through the black abyss that kept them trapped. Fragments of her lost life teased and tormented her as they fought to return home, and the more she questioned her past, the more she knew she was being lied to.
Tiny flashes from somewhere deep inside her subconscious continually echoed that there was only one man in her life. Only one love had ever reached out and truly touched her heart.
**But was it William or Liam?**
**William Pennington is nothing but a stalker. He made your life hell for weeks**
Liam's angry voice broke through her thoughts, but only to be counter attacked by Will's.
** When you finally come to your senses, you'll remember that I love you much more than he *ever* did, and when he breaks your heart again**
More confused than ever, Buffy struggled with the two faces dancing before her eyes.
William was, rich, good-looking and he seemed genuinely found of her. But it felt wrong. There was something missing with this man, heat - fire. There was simply no spark when he kissed her.
Liam on the other hand was a different story. He not only sparked; he sent shock waves of electricity right through her body. He held the missing element. When Liam touched her skin he set her blood on fire. Buffy still couldn't remember falling in love with the man she had married, but if she really searched her heart, she didn't need her memories to know the answer. She belonged to Liam. She didn't have a past and until it returned her present was stuck in limbo but when Buffy thought of the future, if she was truly honest with herself, all she could see was Liam. All she wanted was Liam.
**But would he still want her? After this night was over would he be the one leaving this time?**
As her thoughts snapped back to the present, and to the look on Liam's face when he first heard that William was back, Buffy knew she was wasting precious time. She had to find both the mansion and Pennington before Liam did... For all their sakes.
**If only these streets didn't all look the same**
Turing her head one last time for inspiration, a flash of blurring yellow on the horizon answered her prayers.
**She might not remember the way to the mansion but there were others that did**
Stepping off the sidewalk, Buffy stood in the middle of the road and holding out both of her small arms she waved frantically, forcing the approaching taxi to stop in its tracks. With a slight screech of rubber tyres the car came to an abrupt halt and the bald headed driver shook his head in amazement as he glared out of the side window.
"Lady, have you got a serious death wish or something?" Charles Gunn demanded as he watched the small blonde waif step closer to his cab. It was his last run of the night and the last thing he needed was to hit a pedestrian, especially a crazy one.
Relieved that the car had stopped for her, Buffy was too immersed in her own troubles to notice the sarcasm in the driver's voice. Her only concern was getting to William Pennington's house as quickly as possible and putting an end to the nightmare that had taken over her life. Her first priority was stopping any bloodshed, but while she was heading in that direction, Buffy also knew there was a second reason for seeking out the English poet. She was no longer taking *no* for an answer.
With the two men in the same room, if Liam couldn't or wouldn't fill in the lost pieces of the puzzle, then maybe William would. And if they didn't, maybe it was time to make them...
**That's if they hadn't killed each other first **
"Hey! Do you want a cab or not?" The rich masculine voice of the driver broke her out of reverie.
Leaning forward, Buffy peered into the side window and gratefully nodded her head.
"I need to get to Crawford Street. I'm looking for a mansion " She asked as she flung open the car door and after closing it behind her, dropped wearily into the back seat. "Please, as quickly as possible"
"Sure, I know the place you want. That's where that poet lives. My wife reads his work all the time. A bit hearts and flowers for my taste but she likes it" The driver chatted happily as he pulled back out into the road. Although it was getting dark, he was surprised the girl needed a cab, it was such a short distance and every person in Sunnydale knew where the English writer lived. After all, how many celebrities were there in Sunnydale?
Raising his eyes to his mirror, Charles Gunn studied his passenger sitting quietly in the back seat. She was an extremely attractive young woman, although a little on the thin side if he was honest, but it wasn't her looks that caught his attention. The girl's eyes were so troubled, the sad hazel orbs almost looked haunted.
Turning on to main Street Charles tried to strike up a conversation.
"I guess you must be new in town" He asked, not believing a local wouldn't know where Crawford street was.
Buffy was looking out of the window at the passing houses, at the question she sighed sadly.
"I've been away for a while, I guess my memory's not what it used to be" She tried to act calmly but the tension in her voice wasn't missed on either of them.
" Don't worry, It's not that far, we'll be there in less than ten minutes"
"Good... That's good." Buffy turned her head away from the window as her gallery flashed past and closed her eyes.
It seemed the longest ten minutes of her life...
*****
Crawford street, it turned out, was just on the outskirts of town and much to Buffy's surprise, it seemed that every person in Sunnydale knew of William Pennington and the large mansion he kept on in Sunnydale. Everyone that was except her.
The journey seemed to last forever and as the cab turned down the impressive street in question, Buffy's eyes nervously flicked from one large building to the next, hoping that one of them would jump out at her and shout its recognition. In the end she didn't need to be told that they had arrived. When the car pulled up in front of the most impressive building in Sunnydale, Buffy went cold. Looming up out of the dark night, the cold gray structure seemed to whisper out her name from every nook and cranny.
"This is Pennington's place, but it doesn't look like anyone's at home" the driver said offering his opinion as he glanced up at the tall building, blanketed in total darkness.
This part of town was so isolated; he didn't like the idea of leaving the young woman all alone. There was something very vulnerable about the small blonde girl in the back seat of his cab and the thought of leaving her stranded went against his better judgement.
"I can wait for you if you want" Charles asked over his shoulder.
Buffy smiled her gratitude but refused the kind offer. "Thanks, but I'll be fine"
Climbing from the cab, she watched the taillights disappear back up the street, and turning towards the mansion, Buffy shivered and felt the small hairs on the back of her neck stand on end. There was something evil about this house. At one time in her life this house had caused her intense pain.
**And you want to go right back inside? Great idea** Buffy tried to reason with herself about going inside, but she already knew she would lose that argument.
**Liam's inside that house. Liam, William Pennington and the secrets from my past.. **
It didn't matter how afraid she was; there was no going back..
*****
Climbing the stone steps that lead to the front door, Buffy took a deep breath and felt a needed rush of adrenaline wash through her tired body. She was through with all the lies, all the bullshit she had been spun since she'd first woken into this nightmare of a world. It was time to take charge of her life and stop being the victim. It was time to fight fire with fire and at that very moment Buffy realised that maybe it was time she used a few dirty tricks of her own.
**You just left, Buffy. You didn't give me the chance to understand. You. Just. Left. **
If what Liam had told her was true, he couldn't help her; so, she would just have to help herself.
On reaching the top step, the first signs that Liam had reached the mansion before her was clearly obvious. The large front door was left ajar and as Buffy pushed it open and walked in, she immediately noticed the sound of broken glass snap crisply beneath her small feet.
**Oh God, Liam. What have i done**
Buffy felt her stomach nosedive and it took every ounce of strength she had, not to turn around and run as far away from the house as possible. Only the knowledge that if she did run, it wouldn't just be from the house stopped her. Buffy knew if she didn't confront her demons now she wouldn't stop running until she could never be found again.
As a vision of soft brown, enigmatic eyes rose up and teased her memory, she finally accepted that she didn't want to run any longer. She wanted answers. Straight answers. What ever happened next she was finally taking back her life.
"Hello?.." Buffy waited for a second but there was no reply. Only faint echoes of her own voice accompanied her footsteps.
"Liam?" She called out louder this time but received the same response.
Continuing to walk through the impressive hallway, the sound of shattered glass was the only noise that broke the eerie stillness. The hall was in darkness but even still, Buffy couldn't fail to notice other telltale signs of a fight. On noticing a splintered table blocking her path a sliver of fear crept slowly up her spine.
**This was all her fault and if Liam was hurt...** Buffy shut that thought down as quickly as it flashed through her head. The thought of her husband suffering pain because he thought she was an unfaithful bitch was more than she could bear.
"Maybe I should reconsider that running away option again" Buffy tried to joke but it fell flat.
Following the trail of damage, she eventually noticed a small glow coming from under a door at the far end of the hall.
With a small push the large door opened without a sound. Buffy stopped dead still in the doorway and peered inside.
The room was beautiful. Heavy drapes hung across all the windows and although the only light in the room came from a small over turned lamp, the uninvited guest had little difficulty making out the lone figure, leaning drunkenly against one wall at the far end of the sitting room.
As she stood in the doorway William Pennington made no attempt to look up. His thoughts were far too immersed in the bottle of bourbon that was happily slipping down his throat, trying to numb the burning pain that shot behind his bruised eyes.
His whole body ached but that wasn't the pain William was trying to wipe out. He had been so close, so bloody close to taking Buffy away from that bastard Angelus that he could almost taste it. But suddenly it didn't taste so sweet. It wasn't supposed to have happened this way. When Darla had first asked him to help her get rid of Liam's wife it had all seemed so simple. He wasn't supposed to care about her, just break them apart.
**That stupid bitch of a sister should have warned me. ** William inwardly cursed as he once again raised the bottle to his lips and tried to numb the pain in his heart.
** Nothing about Buffy Angelus was simple, she had away of getting into a man's blood and once under his skin, there was no way of getting free.**
For the first time in his life, William was hopelessly in love and there was nothing he wouldn't do to keep her.
The fight had been wonderful; Liam had played right into his hands and as soon as his bruises were at their best, he would put a call into the cops and have the loser arrested.
At the though of Buffy's husband behind bars and finally out of his hair, Will smiled. It was at that point that he felt her presence.
"William.. " Buffy's spoke quietly but made no attempt to enter the room.
Lifting his head to the sound of her voice, he didn't answer at first; he just let his eyes drink in the contours of her face.
Under such an intense gaze Buffy felt her cheeks flush and her throat go dry. On closer inspection, the room was a real mess. As her eyes scanned the damage, Will's head turned a fraction and the light from the lamp lit up the full extent of his beating. Both his eyes were beginning to swell and there was a thin line of blood smeared beneath nose, which by the shape of it was possibly broken.
"Oh, God.. Are you all right?" With the shock of seeing the good looking face, battered and bruised almost beyond recognition, Buffy took her first steps into the room.
Yet again broken glass cracked beneath her feet.
At this second question William shook his head, slightly amused at her concern. At the sudden movement a searing pain shot through his battered body and he quickly lifted the bottle he was still holding to his split lips and knocked back what was left of the contents. The cool amber liquid burned with a welcome fire as it slid effortlessly down the back of his throat, but even though most of the alcohol was now swimming happily through his blood stream, it so far hadn't numbed the pain.
"I hope your husband knows a good defence lawyer, he's certainly going to need one"
William looked up and his hungry gaze bore directly into Buffy's eyes. For an instant, she felt an unreasonable tremor of fear flutter through her body but it was quickly pushed a side.
"I think it's safe to say Liam has that covered" Refusing to let herself feel intimidated, Buffy's voice hid her fear well.
As she studied the damage her husband had left on the younger man's face, strangely, her first thought was for Liam's safety.
** Liam might be an excellent attorney but If Pennington pressed assault charges against him...** Buffy tried not to think of the consequences. Trying to ignore the deep purple swellings now covering what had earlier been a devilishly handsome face, she tried to change the subject.
"You told me we were lovers.. I want to know why you lied to me."
"I never lied to you, pet."
Buffy didn't move.
"Angelus got to you, didn't he?" Pulling away from the wall, William snorted in disgust.
Buffy still didn't move, although her heart was beating so hard she thought that it would break her chest she stood her ground.
"He's a clever sod, I'll give him that much" William spat a mouthful of blood towards the floor and dropped the bottle he was holding into the nearest chair.
"It never crossed your mind that he's the one telling the lies. No, you'd rather believe what that smarmy bastard fed you than follow your own heart" Shoving his hands in the front pockets of his tight, faded jeans, Will slowly sauntered forward.
As the tall, slim figure moved through the dim light, Buffy tried not to notice how his jeans sheathed his lean hips or how his white T-shirt hugged his well-developed chest. Tilting her head slightly, their eyes met and for a second she almost swore she saw a flicker of despair in his penetrating gaze, but only for a second. When she looked again it was quickly replaced with an arrogant gleam.
**Sexy, arrogant bastard**
Even on the wrong end of a severe beating William Pennington looked hot, but no matter how much sex appeal he radiated, Buffy didn't feel the attraction. Even with amnesia she knew he wasn't her type
**He's wasn't Liam**
**You'd rather believe what that smarmy bastard fed you than follow your own heart**
"But that's where you're wrong. It's my heart that knows you're lying." Buffy snapped back the reply with cool certainty.
William laughed
"Am I? And why would I lie Buffy?" he asked as his hungry eyes slid insolently down the full length of her body. She was still wearing her new dress and it was having the same effect on him as it had earlier worked on Angel
Buffy stood frozen to the spot as William continued to close the distance between them. As his tall lean body moved ever closer the air between them seemed to crackle. Anticipation, fear, love, hate. The emotions being exchanged between the two of them with each new step were almost tangible.
"Someone is lying to me" Feeling uncomfortable by his closeness, Buffy tried to retreat but her progress was stopped as she felt her back hit the cold wall
"Like I said before, why would *I* lie? You might not remember yet but when you do you'll know that you belong to me, Buffy. You love me" William's grin was so smug Buffy would have given anything at that moment to knock it right off his face.
Coming to a stand still Will placed his hands on each side of her body, trapping her small frame up against the wall. He leaned forward, his nose nearly touching hers. Buffy swallowed, she could almost taste the alcohol on his breath, as she took a nervous breath, she could smell his blood
"Trust me, pet. I'm the good guy here"
He was teasing her now and his eyes glinted seductively as his body pressed even closer.
Buffy nervously bit into her bottom lip.
"I don't believe.. " she didn't get a chance to finish her sentence. William grabbed her; his long slim fingers gripping her thin arms so tightly they bruised the delicate flesh. Buffy struggled but before she could breakaway he clamped his hot mouth over her lips and kissed her with a desire so passionate that the girl in his arms almost forgot how to breathe.
"Buffy. Oh, God, Buffy." William whispered fiercely as time after time, his hungry mouth tore at her lips
Caught completely off guard, Buffy's mind whirled as her blood pumped wildly through her veins. The kiss was rough, almost violent and as William groaned deep in his throat, his arms tightened around Buffy's slim shoulders pulling her body into his. The kiss grew more intense but even as Buffy's heart thundered against her ribs she knew that it wasn't passion she was feeling.... The kiss was wrong, in every way possible it was wrong.
This man could never have been her lover; he didn't come near to touching her heart the way Liam always did. He might be touching her body but he could never reach inside her soul. William Pennington was a fraud, a liar and that was the truth. She didn't know if it was a just a gut feeling or a lost memory trying to break through, but she knew it was the truth.
**This man wasn't the reason you left Angel**
With the realisation set in stone, Buffy finally yanked her head away. Her large hazel eyes flashing with emotion
"Let go of me. It's not you, it was never you"
For a moment only the sound of hard breathing separated them. In an instant, the temperature in the room seemed to drop to freezing and both occupants knew their lives would never be the same again.
"It was never you" Buffy whispered again as she fought to control her breathing.
The harsh words stuck home and stole every vestige of colour from the blonde man's cheeks. Standing in the dim light, his skin took on the deadly white appearance of the dead.
"Your memory's returned" It was a statement, not a question. One glance at the fire in her hazel eyes told him without doubt that the deception was over.
Buffy just continued to glare and played her own charade for all she was worth. Whatever happened next, she knew it would once again change her life forever.
For the longest moment of William Pennington's life there was no sound in the room.
If he were completely honest with himself he would have admitted that her kiss had already told him everything he needed to know. She didn't love him, even in a complete state of amnesia Buffy couldn't return the feelings his heart overflowed with and, now that she remembered her past, she would never be his. It was over.
The bluff was called and he had lost.
Fooled into believing that the woman he adored now knew who really was lying, William felt his happiness slide away. He'd always known the game he and Darla were playing was dangerous. There was always a strong possibility that Buffy would remember their so-called love affair was only in his head, but it was a chance he accepted willingly. Stretching the truth a little or even a lot if he got the girl of his dreams wasn't a problem. And it had almost worked. Just a few more days and the Angelus' marriage would have been destroyed forever. The look on the old sod's face that night had told him that much. Liam Angelus had walked from his house a shattered man.
** If only the bloody amnesia had lasted a few more days**
Cursing under his breath, and knowing he had nothing left to lose William took a step towards Buffy.
"I might have lied about our affair, Buffy, but it doesn't change how I feel about you." He started softly and nervously ran his hand across his bruised jaw.
Buffy moved away from the wall, but as the realisation of William's deceit sank in, her anger started to spin out of control. Thinking she was being lied to was one thing but hearing somebody admit that they had purposely tried to ruin her life was very different.
"Oh God, I was right, it was you all the time. Everything you told me was a lie... I almost believed you"
Too late, William realised his mistake. Buffy hadn't remembered her past at all. She had played him for a fool and he had let her trick a confession from his stupid mouth.
**Fuck it**
At the look of horror that crossed her beautiful features, Will quickly tried to justify his actions.
"I only did it because I love you, Buffy. You have no idea what it's like watching you, day after day, being so unhappy. I've had this ache in my chest ever since the first second I saw you. You were in so much pain...The way he treated you.. I just wanted to save you " William's jaw tightened and his skin drew tight across his chiselled cheekbones.
Holding on to the back of a chair for support, Buffy closed her eyes as a single tear slipped beneath her dark lashes..
"I love you" He tried to reach for her but she pushed his hand away.
"You bastard. You low-life lying bastard. I've been in hell for the last two weeks and all the time you could have ended it. That was when you could have saved me " Buffy cried out as the pain and confusion trapped inside her head exploded. She wasn't a cheat or a liar. He was.
To her surprise, William started to laugh but there was no humour in the cold sound
" You're not the only one, luv. I've been in Hell now for the last two years. I didn't want to fall in love with you. I knew it was wrong, but I had no choice. You're in my gut, in my throat, I'm drowning in you Summers, I'm drowning in you" Before she could move further away, William's fingers clamped around her wrists, once again pulling her body up hard against his chest.
" Just give me a chance to explain"
Leaning his face close to her ear, Will's hot breath washed over her cold skin in shuddering waves.
"No" Buffy gasped
She tried pulling her hands free but his long fingers bit deep into her flesh.
"Stop fighting me, I won't hurt you"
"You already have"
"Please..."
Buffy refused to listen as renewed anger burned through her veins.
"After what you've put me through there's nothing you could say that I would believe. I could never love a man like you..." She raised her head and stared straight into his cool, dangerous eyes.
William smirked, but her next three words cut right through his heart and shattered the four beating chambers into a million shards.
"You're beneath me"
Pennington jerked as if she had physically slapped him but continued to grip both her small wrists in his large fingers.
"You bitch. You bloody bitch.. I'll show you who's beneath who"
Before Buffy could move, the handsome features facing her changed into an almost unrecognisable mask of fury. With a violent jerk, once again Will's lips firmly moulded over her mouth. Gasping in horror, Buffy tried to break free, but he was too strong. Continuing to struggle, hot tears of anger welled up in her eyes but it was only when she tasted blood in her mouth, where his teeth had bitten into her lower lip did she finally find the strength to push away
"Let. Me. Go. " The sound of her voice sent a chill right through the room.
Still locked within the circle of William's strong arms Buffy glared at him with stormy green eyes
"Buffy, please" William pleaded as he tried desperately to hold onto the struggling girl's wrists. The situation was getting out of control and he had to try and make her see sense.
Buffy was now beyond listening to anything he said. Her bruised lips throbbed and her wrists stung with the pressure of his finger.
"Get the fuck off me" Without another word, Buffy kicked out her foot and nailed his shin as hard as she could.
"Bloody Hell" William jerked back in shock, releasing Buffy's wrist at the same time. For a second, a look of sheer disbelief flashed across his face but it was quickly dropped. Knowing that he had burnt all his bridges the handsome young man's heavy shoulders finally sagged in defeat and he stepped back.
" You bastard, I could have you arrested for this" Buffy's voice was so quiet he almost missed the threat.
When she lifted her hand to her mouth and ran her trembling fingers across her swollen lips, William sighed, letting out a deep ragged breath.
"For what its worth.. I'm sorry"
Even as the words slipped over his lips he knew in his heart that he wasn't sorry for lying, just sorry it hadn't worked.
Not wanting to stay in the same room as Pennington for another second, Buffy shook her head and turned to walk away, but as she went to walk out the door, she stopped.
"Just answer me one question honestly.... Darla... Darla told me the same story... Why? " That was the one part of this charade that Buffy still didn't understand. Darla had almost convinced her that William was telling the truth.
At the sound of his sister's name, William suddenly saw one last spark of hope. As long as Buffy thought it was only him plotting against her, Darla still had a chance to break them wide apart. Buffy might hate him at the moment but if she thought Liam was screwing Darla, maybe, just maybe he could still save something from this disaster. It worked like a charm the last time they had tried it. Buffy was so angry she ran all the way to New York. As long as she still had amnesia there was no reason it wouldn't work again.
William inwardly smiled. If he couldn't have Buffy he would do everything in his power to make sure that Liam never could.
Turning his head he let his eyes shadow with guilt.
"Don't blame Darla, she's my sister and she believed what I told her. Darla has nothing to do with any of this "Even as the lie was growing William started to feel that there was still a chance. Darla would save the day; she always was the stronger sibling.
**Besides, she had got him into this fucking mess in the first place**
Lowering his eyes and looking as sad and pathetic as he possibly could, the young poet was already working out his next move. He took a slow breath, fighting to keep his tone as level as possible.
" Tell your *husband* I won't be pressing charges" Will rubbed the large purple swelling that covered his jaw and winced slightly with the pain. There was still a hint of bitterness in his voice but that couldn't be helped. After all, he was a poet not a bloody actor.
Relieved that Liam wouldn't get in trouble, Buffy nodded. She still wasn't sure if she believed William, especially the part about his sister not knowing, but when her gaze finally settled on his battered face all she could read was pain in the depths of his troubled eyes. Pain and a deep sadness.
Moving through the doorway Buffy realised that she still had so many questions unanswered but now was not the time or the place to ask them. Taking one final look at the man who had tried to destroy her marriage, she left William Pennington with a final shot.
"Maybe its time you took a trip back to the mother country.. And stayed there"
******
William dragged his bruised body up the stairs and headed straight for the bathroom. As he switched on the light he caught his reflection in the mirror and winced. Both eyes were now nothing more than swollen slits and the best part of his jaw was purple. It was definitely not one of his better nights. Turning on the shower spray, Will kicked off his boots, carefully pulled his blood splattered T-shirt over his head and dropped his jeans on the bathroom floor. His face was a mess, his dreams of a life with Buffy were in ruins and there was no hot water.
Stepping under the spray the water was ice cold and it stung. Sharp needles attacked his bruised flesh but in his present state of mind William didn't care. It was a welcome distraction. Closing his eyes, he leant against the cold tiles and as the icy water washed over his body he let all thoughts of Buffy wash over his mind. Tomorrow, first thing he would call Darla. She would know what to do. Darla would make it right, she always did.
TBC... In about a week :)
