October 2, Saturday

Wake up to obscene chatter and crying. Throw pillows in their general direction and insist that they shut up. Still not used to the idea of being ignored, drag myself into the showers.

Slightly more awake, I come back from the prefect's bathroom and am quickly informed that Jiggles has died during the night and that evidence suggests he was poisoned. Asked if I fed Jiggles anything the previous night. Immediatly feeling insulted, I say no.

Prance into common room and notice young Malfoy sitting by the fire. Feel something similar to pity for him. The heart breaking antics of a young Blaise Zabini is enough to make anyone miserable and lonlely - even if our relationship began and ended in the sandbox. Quietly dismiss him groping a snaggle toothed sixth-year.

Meet Pansy for brunch in the Great Hall. Happy to see that she has taken my advice and is now brunching on celery sticks instead of lard. Silently nod my head in approval until she takes a chocolate frog out of her silk pouch. As any good friend would, I sieze the treat from her celulite-craving grasp. Between bites of the chocolate, I attempt to explain that my metabolism is far superior to hers, and that I was only helping her in the battle of the buldge.

Proceed towards library where I plan to scribble a couple of sentences on a scroll for Divination and demand praise in return. Pass a depressing Head of House in the corridor. I Nod my head and smile as he suggests I attend detention tonight. Consider my options and prompt for sneaking into Hogsmeade with Pansy instead.

Waste the rest of the day congratulating self on writing an ingenius paragraph for that horrid Trelawney woman. At percisely 11 p.m., I take direct floo-link from abandoned office to Hogsmeade. Rendevous with Pansy, Tracey Davis, and several other Hogwart's students inside Hog's Head where someone foolishly claims they can drink me under the table.



October 3, Sunday

Head pounds itself into oblivion and gods ignore my pleas to put me out of my misery. Notice lack of usual surroundings before quietly sneaking out of the Ravenclaw boys' dorm and wandering towards my own. Met by disgustingly smug Millicent Barstrode in common room where she kindly points out a hickey on my neck. In the friendliest way possible, I manage to tell her to kiss my arse through gritted teeth.

Bathe and qucikly apply cosmetic charm over previously mentioned hickey. Dissapointingly, only manage to make three Gryffindor girls and one seventh year boy from Hufflepuff cry on way to lunch. Try to decifer the events that transpired the previous night while denying all accusations of snogging and dissapearing with nameless Ravenclaw male.

Spend rest of the day unable to locate prefect-badge before ending up face to face with a disgruntled Head of House. I Ditch all standards and any concept of shame and turn my infamous charm on Snape. Doesn't work. Despite my demands for a retrial, I am handed a mop and pointed towards a foul smelling supply room.



October 4, Monday

Reluctantly attend double Transfiguration with the Ravenclaws first thing in the morning. immediatly have to defend my honor when a seventh year boy dares to approach me as if I knew him after class. I Make a mental note not to save a hysterically laughing Pansy Parkinson from her obese fate as the boy looks distraught and hands me my prefect badge with claims that I left it in his dorm two nights prior.

Drag myself to dungeons and reassure Snape that responsible prefect such as myself, is perfectly capable to doing punishment unattended. Once the greasy man is out of sight, I plop myself on empty desk and proceed to give my cuticiles much deserved attention.