Part 7 - Liz POV - Plenty

I looked into your eyes
They told me plenty
I already knew.
You never felt a thing
So soon forgotten all that you do
In more than words
I tried to tell you
The more I tried I failed.
I would not let myself believe that you might stray
And I would d stand by you
No matter what they'd say.
I thought I'd be with you until my dying day
Until my dying day.

I used to think my life
Was often empty
A lonely space to fill.
You hurt me more than I ever could have imagined
You made my world stand still
And in that stillness
There was a freedom
I never felt before
I would not let myself believe that you might stray
And I would stand by you no matter what they'd say.
I would.
I thought I would be with you until my dying day...
Until my dying day.

You know, you would have thought that would have been harder, ripping my own heart out like that.

It was surprisingly easy though. Almost as easy as it was to storm out of the school at the prom when I caught Max with Tess. It felt freeing, liberating, strong.

It wasn't like when I walked away from Max at the pod chamber at all. I had felt every single ounce of pain in every bone of my body that day. And this is certainly as final as that was, at least in my mind.

When I told Max that we could never be together again a few hours ago, it was the easiest thing I have ever done. Of course, I am ignoring the expression that was on Max's face when I last saw him, the one that had told me that every single one of his worst nightmares was coming true. It is currently, indelibly branded on my brain. It's there, but I'm not seeing it, at least not right now.

Right now I am rolling my eyes at Sean Deluca as he makes a fool of himself.

The Crashdown was still open when I got back and Sean was there, harassing Maria, who had returned to help my dad clean up.

His face lit up when he saw me and it was then that I knew that he was waiting for me. I feel bad because I can't be more excited. Sure, I'm not feeling any pain, but making a complete break from your soul mate does not inspire you to want to hang out with other guys who have the hots for you. At least not right away. I feel like I am entitled to a little wallowing time. I think maybe that's why I couldn't let go of Max last time. I didn't grieve for what we had let slip away from us.

Maria takes one look at my face and says, "Get out of here Sean. Now." She grabs him by the nape of his neck and pulls him off the stool, thrusting him towards the door. Of course he is ten times bigger than her and would not be going anywhere if he didn't want to be, but he is currently being amenable. Actually, he's just ignoring her.

"Hey Parker. I see you finally ditched the baggage." He teases, breaking away from Maria and approaching me.

"His name is Max you dweeb." Maria flares, smacking him, harder than is really necessary. "And if anyone's baggage around here, its you dork."

"So, what are you doing tonight?" Sean asks, grabbing Maria by the arm and gently subjecting her to a head-lock, in that typical big-brother, older cousin way. He is ignoring her screeches for my help.

And so this is the point when I roll my eyes. "Sean, let her go."

"Only if you'll go out with me." Sean replies. "She's my hostage."

"Blackmailing me didn't work last time. Not in the long term anyway." I retort, as he lets Maria go because she bit him on the hand. She starts to smack him again.

"You're just lucky Michael isn't here." Maria says. Her face is all red and I can tell she is actually really mad. "Get lost and I may not tell him."

Sean snorts. "Like I'm scared of your weenie boyfriend." But he saunters towards the door. "Call me Parker. I think we have some stuff to discuss."

"AAAARRRGGGHHHH!" Maria screeches in annoyance, throwing a glass at her cousin's retreating form. "I really do not understand why you give that idiot the time of day Lizzie. You know, sometimes I would give anything to let Michael blast him. He is driving me CRAZY!" The plastic glass has hit the door, fortunately missing the window by about a millimeter.

"Was that really necessary Maria?" I ask as I go to pick it up.

But she has already forgotten about Sean, the Deluca wind changing direction so quickly, as usual, my head is suddenly spinning. "Liz, what's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong Maria." I don't even know why I am bothering to deny it. While I am currently numb, it would appear that the fact that Max and I are totally over is reflected on my face for the entire world to see - or at least for my best friend to see.

"Puh-lease. Where's Max?"

"At home I think." I shrug.

"Liz..." Maria says warningly. "Things looked like they were going so well this morning. What happened?"

I close my eyes briefly, and then decide to just tell her. She's not going to leave me alone until I do anyway. "We kissed."

"WHAT???" I can hear the joy in her voice. Why is it that this is the first thing that starts to penetrate the armour I have built around my heart since I shut down after those flashes? I feel a catch in my throat, swallow hard to control it. Maria grabs me by the arm, turns me around so that I am facing her. "This is so great! So are you back together?"

"Not exactly." I manage to choke out. The light dies out of Maria's eyes instantly.

"What happened?" She demands, more quietly, but urgently, like she knows that it is going to be terrible and she just wants to get it over with.

"Remember how I used to see stars when Max and I kissed?" I ask, knowing that my voice suddenly sounds bitter and hard. "Well, I saw a lot more than stars this time."

Maria's hands come up to cover her mouth in horror. "Oh my God. You didn't see...?"

"Max and Tess?" I ask, raising my eyebrows. "Yup. And it was lovely let me tell you."

"Oh Lizzie. I am so sorry." Maria reaches out, pulls me into an embrace. "But, I mean, you didn't SEE everything."

"I really don't want to remember what I did see." I tell her, pulling away. Already the horrible flashes are starting to circulate in my mind again.

"God, I don't blame you." Maria plops down onto one of the stools, an absolutely shell-shocked look on her face. "And to think that I used to envy you those. Especially now that I know what its like." I glance at her, surprised. "Yeah. Michael showed me some stuff. But he had some control over it. Holy Mary..." She trails off. "Liz, I am so sorry."

"It's over Maria. If today taught me anything, its that I can't be around Max without wanting to BE with him. And its now clear. I can't be. Ever again. He belongs to her now. Even though he doesn't want to, he does."

Maria looks so sad, I suddenly want to comfort HER. It is, of course, ridiculous, but I know that this is going to be hard on everyone. Max is miserable, I'll be miserable as soon as this weird numbness wears off, and our poor friends are going to have to bear the brunt of it, not to mention be torn between us.

Because even though I presently never want to see him again, I know its not going to last. He IS my soulmate, my love. I am never going to stop wanting to be with him, even if I live to be a hundred, get married twelve times and have twenty kids with other guys.

I lied to Max when I told him that he wasn't the same person he used to be - that I had seen it in the flashes. The worst part of this whole thing is that I could tell he was. That was MY Max who had been with Tess. That he could do what he had done with Tess, while hating me, even for a little while...

And suddenly I don't want to think about it anymore. "Listen Maria, something good did come from today." Maria stares at me with glazed eyes. "Its about Alex." She perks up. "We did find out something important before the great flash tragedy of 2001." I know that I sound flippant, but I have no choice. Because this is a tragedy, of Shakespearean proportions. I am beginning to wonder why I didn't listen to my own little speech - the one I gave to poor Max way back when I was trying to get him to fall out of love with me, about Romeo and Juliet being a tragedy and not romantic at all.

"What?" Maria asks.

"He fought her. Alex wasn't working with Tess at all and he tried to get away from her before the mind-warp started to really destroy his mind." I paused. "And that's not all. She was working with someone else. Leanna told me and Max that Tess came to find Alex and she was with a guy - someone named Lazar."

Maria is frowning. "I don't know if this is better Liz. I hate knowing that Alex KNEW what was happening to him. At least if he was mindwarped the whole time..."

I reach out, put my arm around her comfortingly. "I know. But he fought her Maria. That's a lot more than the rest of us ever did. It just shows that he really was the bravest and strongest of all of us."

"Like we didn't already know that." Maria smiles sadly. "God Liz. I miss him so much. Is this ever going to stop hurting?"

"I hope not." I reply. "Because that would mean we forgot him. I'll never forget him. Never." I squeeze her shoulder, then stand up. "Anyway, I'm going there - to Tess's." I clarify when Maria looks at me questioningly.

"Why?" Maria asks. "She's gone Liz. What good can it do?"

"I can find out who was working with her and at least HE can be brought to justice for what they did to Alex."

Maria nods. "I'm coming with you. But do you really think Tess left that information lying around?" She asks as we turn off the lights and lock up the restaurant.

"I don't think Tess was nearly as smart as we've all given her credit for." I reply. "Her cards were always visible. We just stopped looking for them."

We are in the Jetta before Maria tries again, gently. "Liz, do you think maybe you're just reading too much into this...you know...to forget what happened with you and Max?"

"Maybe." I answer honestly. "But this Lazar guy exists Maria. And I'm going to find him."

Maria still looks worried, but she doesn't argue anymore.

*****************************************************

It only takes about ten minutes to drive to the housing development where Tess's old house is. I feel a shiver descend my spine as we pull up, remembering how creepy both Tess and Nasedo were that night I had gone to plant the camera in the house.

I had done it because I had seen Max and Tess kissing, but I had known in my heart that Max was telling me the truth- that she was doing something to him. And so I had tried to prove it, because my faith in him was so strong.

I briefly wish that everything I had seen in those flashes from Max was a hoax, a mind-warp, just like the last time. But it was impossible. Tess was gone, on another planet. She was strong, but not THAT strong. That had been all Max in those flashes.

Maria is out of the car and on the lawn, skulking near the front picture window before I can even formulate a plan. Now that she is IN, she's really in, in typical Maria fashion.

"Maria! Wait!" I hiss, hurrying after her.

"Liz, I think there's someone in there!" Maria whispers back. "The shadows are moving."

I feel my heart beginning to beat a mile a minute. Could we have found the mysterious Lazar so easily? Was he really under our noses the whole time?

But if it he, we can't face him alone. He's dangerous. I'm going to have to call Max.

So much for keeping my distance. And yet, my heart is strangely excited at the prospect.

See, I told you I'm hopeless.

But, for the moment, we need confirmation.

I press my nose up against the bottom of the window, beside my best friend's. "Who is it? Is it a guy?"

"Definitely male." Maria affirms.

"And you two are definitely females...nosy ones at that." The voice comes from behind us, causing me to whirl, my heart lodged in my throat and Maria to shriek.

It's Michael of course. Maria is already slapping him for scaring the living daylights out of us.

I hear someone bump into something inside the house, then swear quietly. Suddenly a light comes on, but not an electric one. It is all alien and a familiar face is illuminated, bathed in the glow shining up from his palm.

Max.

So maybe I hadn't devastated him as much as I had thought. He's out playing detective too. But I know that it is not true. His face is a mask as he stares down on all of us.

"Michael, I thought you weren't coming." He doesn't even acknowledge mine or Maria's presence, at least verbally. His eyes are on my face, unreadable in the semi-dark, shadowed by the faint bluish light.

"Changed my mind." Michael replies. "And apparently Frick and Frack here had the same idea as we did." He glares at Maria. "Didn't I tell you that it was dangerous to go around alone after dark?"

"I'm not alone." Maria retorts, linking her arm with mine. "I'm with Liz. Besides, Tess is gone. Where's the danger?"

"Hello? Khivar? Random Skins? Nicholas?" Michael begins counting off on this fingers.

Maria rolls her eyes. "Its not us they want you moron."

"Right. You're disposable." Michael replied. "Do you think any of them would think twice about hurting you two? To get to us." He looks at Max. "Am I not right here Maxwell?"

I scowl at both of them because I don't want to hear Max's answer to that question. "We have just as much right to be here as you do." I snap. "Alex was OUR best friend."

Michael eyes me with annoyance. "Do I have to remind YOU Miss Parker about that device that almost blew up in your face a few days ago?"

"WHAT????" This is Max of course. Ooops. I forgot he didn't know about that. I can see from Michael's face that he forgot too. But like Max has any right to get mad. He was the one off sleeping with his once and future bride WHEN I was in that danger. He could have been with me. I had ASKED him to help me.

"Never mind." Michael mutters. "Anyway, my point is made."

"Well, we're not alone now...are we?" Maria asks, batting her eyelashes at Michael. She has moved away from me and is snaking her arms around his waist. "C'mon Spaceboy. Let us stay."

My eyes momentarily meet Max's in embarrassment at witnessing the way Michael melts, right in front of us. Suddenly I know what it must have been like to be around Max and I at the height of our relationship. I can't help but smile to myself at the thought of it.

And dammit, he sees me do it and, being Max, he KNOWS what I am thinking. His own face softens and his eyes are staring at me in that way again. I force myself to look away.

I hear the sigh in Max's voice as he says, "You can all stay of course. Just stop making so much noise and get in here." He reaches out his hand and eyes me through the window. I can tell he is daring me to take it.

Jerk. I thrust my own hand into his and try to ignore the warmth that snakes through me as he closes his around mine.

I don't allow myself to hold onto him a minute longer than necessary. The minute I am inside, I let go, move away from him. I can feel his eyes following me, until he turns to help Maria through.

It is then that everything begins to move in slow motion.

"So what are we looking for?" Maria asks as the four of us begin to move across the darkened living room. I close my eyes briefly, shake my head, trying to clear it. Everything is really fuzzy all of a sudden.

I avoid the piano, which still has that statue sitting on top of it - the one I broke and we all saw Tess fix, the one that told us that there was much more to Tess Harding than met the eye.

"Anything weird." Max replies. "Anything that might tell us more about the deal Nasedo made with the Skins or about this Lazar guy." I swallow hard. His voice is fading in and out, like when your ears get plugged when a plane takes off.

I am moving away from the rest of them, towards the stairs. I'm not sure why, but I feel like I'm being drawn towards the second floor. The minute Max had let go of me, it had started, this need to be up there.

I see Maria beginning to rummage through the kitchen cupboards as I climb the stairs. Michael and Max are arguing about something in the dining room, but I ignore them.

I feel my heart stop in my chest as a faint glow appears suddenly under one of the doors at the end of the upstairs hallway. It is gone as quickly as it came, but I SAW it. The thunder must have been my imagination though because it is perfectly clear when I look out the window at the end of the hallway.

And yet...

I can feel a presence. I know that there is someone in there.

I pause, wonder if I should call for one of the others, for ALL of the others...for Max.

But I know that whatever is in there is meant for me alone.

Of course, even though I am in this weird sort of trance, I know that this is NOT a good thing. That I am in Tess Harding's house and likely anything behind that door is not going to be particularly healthy for Liz Parker. But I have no control over myself as I reach up and turn the doorknob.

And, suddenly, I am face to face with my greatest enemy.

To be continued...