No Words Are Enough


Part Four


by: Asurahime


~*~


Disclaimers: I don't--and most likely never will--own SaGa Frontier since SquareSoft and all those rich people do. I certainly have quite a lot of stuff and fanfiction and fanart pertaining to game, but it means nothing due to the fact that I am not getting any money for it. I'm kinda happy that way... I mean... since I'm just such a procrastinating little ferret, *glances and glares at Anthony even though he most likely won't ever read this fic* I won't get tossed around like a rag doll by angry readers.


Hideaki: *snorts, grabs Asura, and drags her in front of the computer* Speak for yourself, Asura. I make good with my threats, so start typing.


Asura: -_- (I should have stuck with Bombay... At least he won't nag me like Aki does...)


~*~



The bottom of my heart's lake is rimmed with ice, never feeling any emotion except those that are as cold as it. There's no pain. There never was and there never will. I simply go on everyday, not caring what is right and what is wrong. My fate is to continue living and I will be fighting until the end just because of that. It is a force I cannot make do with, a wild state which I cannot prevent. I will run alone because there is no one who can understand tears--just as no one can understand power.


"... I am not certain that I heard you correctly, Zozma."


Being a mystic, I have never been a religious person, but there was just something about my situation which makes me want to clasp a cross to my chest. The moment made me wish to do so many things at once. They were such trifling things which I have never thought of until this very second--during the moment when I realized that Zozma was piercing me with eyes so much like... hers. It was truly unnerving. I wanted to cut through the clouds. I wanted to see the stars. I wanted to stop the winds. I wanted the birds to sing. I wanted the ocean to shine. I wanted the skies to clear. I wanted the night to end. And I wanted to know what I'm feeling. All of the circumstances which I could never experience within the confines of the Mystic Kingdom of Facinaturu. But I didn't like this... I wanted to scold and yet I also wanted to back away. I wanted to comfort and yet I wanted to be cruel. It seemed as if I wanted everything just as much as didn't want anything. All very, very confusing.


"You heard me very clearly, Ildon." She is here with her companions: White Rose, Lute, Rouge, Silence, and Mesarthim. Stop wanting or that will just bring your downfall. Orlouge's soul is dead because of that, and you should know that as well as I do.


It's not too late... is it? Oh, I see that a cold rain is falling here tonight. So is the sky crying for me or for someone else? I can't make any promises, but I suppose that believing wouldn't be too bad. There are still many things which I don't understand, but I can still make a promise to try.


A cold fire. That's what you remind me of. Strong one moment then uncertain and flickering the next. A cold, blue fire. Capable of burning, but a death with ice rather than flame. Why do you have to make everything so damn complicated!? And stop thinking so loudly, you're starting to jar my thinking with your roller coaster of your self-pity and resolve. And do you actually like this rain? Zozma glared up at me before breaking away and dusting himself off, scowling even darker at the falling droplets of water. This was just great--almost as great as the pity-party which I seem to be throwing myself. It seems that the similarities for Asellus and Zozma stops with their eyes. Both were full of life and vigor, but while Asellus' voice resounded in my mind like fire and ice, Zozma's voice often made me cringe in the same manner as I would with a jester's laughter or sandpaper.


I'm not a jester!! Even in the minds of the people I know, I am referred to as reckless or just in a manner that is not at all amusing.


I'm not in the mood for a spat, Zozma. Fortunately for the telepath, I had let my mental barriers down during my contemplation, but I knew that he was not too pleased that my present mindscape was even more dismal and forbidding than the current weather. "I know that you heard what I said, Ildon. If you really don't mind, I don't care if you stay here all night and come out like a drenched rabbat, but I for one would not like to have the rest of my dignity lowered any lower than its current level."


As befitting the Prince of Darkness, I automatically glared at him and replied in my normally brusque manner. I was not in a good mood. Let me be.


After, I glowered back even more fiercely before taking flight to a tree. To my utter disgruntlement, Zozma followed closely after, cursing at the rain and the wind. "I suppose that your Kitten and the others are going to be stuck wherever they are for the moment. For now, we can only wait out this rain. And please cease glaring at me like I'm some sort of parasite. At least your kitten was slightly more genial than you the last three times I spoke to her. Trust that she wasn't very happy the first two times and the third time was even worse, considering that she and White Rose were dragged into the harem of that bloated excuse for a SirDemon named Yaruto."


I started on the higher branches of the tree, signaling to Zozma that I was more than a little surprised at hearing that. All I knew about Yaruto was that he was a dreadful creature who loved nothing better than to collect human and mystic girls to add on to his harem. The idea of the harem itself really did not bother me much since I have seen Orlouge's collection, but the enslavement of Asellus and White Rose just after they escaped darkened my mood even further. "How did they escape?"


"White Rose told me that--"


My scowl returned at full intensity with my displeasure. "You have had contact with White Rose and Asellus!?"


"Will you allow me to explain first before slicing my head off!? White Rose told me that a human girl named Emelia was also 'trapped,' but it had been a cover to topple Yaruto's reign over Trinity. The three of them then joined forces, sliced and diced everyone who dared step in their way and nearly flamed me to death when I arrived to give them my assistance," replied Zozma, looking up at me with a bored eye. Yes, I've had contact with them to get their skins out of that place. They just thought I'm another worker for Yaruto and didn't stop to think before Asellus charged with a RisingNova backed by that Emelia's Headwind and White Rose's FlashFire.


It does not fail to astound me that Asellus would now be capable of learning such a complex--albeit human technique. Moreover, for the first time in quite a long time, a true smile tugged at the corner of my lips. The idea of the impetuous Zozma being slapped around by three women was just too amusing not to visualize. As I expected, the scowl on my companion's face betrays the fact that he caught that little scene playing through my mind as well.


That's just harsh, Ildon. Not even the real thing was that painful. If anything, that is just degrading to my competence in defending myself.


Perhaps having Zozma as a telepath has its advantages after all. All I had to do was send back a reply coolly. What competence?


You're not as fun as Kitten. It's easier to provoke her into verbal or physical reaction but you're like a block of marble that refuses to let it be shaped into something else. Sometimes I wonder if anything can put even a tiny chip in your facade, but I guess invulnerability also came with your title, eh? What brought you to go against Charm Lord, anyway?


This is not something which I wanted to discuss. Zozma certainly had a serpent's tongue, clever and silken, but laced with poison which can kill someone before they can figure out if he is an illusion or not. I may have fallen victim to that at the moment, but I knew the proper antidote: the truth. To protect someone frail because I now know that only Fate could dictate my life.


Dark red brows shot up until they almost reached the rebel's hairline, lining up with the triangular mystic rune set upon his brow. Clearly, that was not an answer that he was expecting. Ildon, what would you do if you are asked to cross a frozen bridge if the risk is your life?


I don't care whether it's a trick question or not anymore. I can see the sun starting to shine and that was all that matters. "I would run across it."


Zozma was dumbfounded once again. "You wouldn't fly over it?"


"Technically, that would not be crossing it. That's flying over, not going across the bridge itself," I added succinctly.


I thought I lost you there for a moment, but your bluntness still says that you're Ildon. I will have you know though, that Kitten is anything but frail. And stop lying to yourself because it's getting annoying. What is meant to happen will happen, including your choice whether or not to intervene in the course of things.


The glare which had disappeared a few minutes ago returned full-force. I do not like to be toyed with. "The rain has stopped Zozma. You can go and bother someone else rather than me now."


That was also pretty harsh, Ildon. The other mystic just smirked back at me, shrugging then lifting up both hands to the air to indicate a hopeless matter. To my extreme relief, he had started to fade around the edges. It's just a shame that I'm not traveling with your kitten right now. And if you would like to know, I believe that she's headed for the Syoin of this place. At the moment, I can hear White Rose's thoughts passing near the Garden. Hurry up if you want to catch them.


If you're going to leave, leave. If you're going to stay, leave. Unfortunately, my mood has not improved any. I needed to warn Asellus about the next mystic, so I just turned my back on the rebel to face the direction of where I hoped my student was.


One more thing, Ildon. Rough laughter reached my ears with those words. How I just wanted to put Zozma in a cage and leave him there for the next century or so. I respect your skills and all, but I would highly suggest that you try sparring with Kitten once more. Your last bout was quite interesting, but your kitten is much more experienced now. It should be an interesting match.


Although I was already halfway to the Garden, I still heard Zozma's voice weaving itself in and out of my head. Why, of all mystics, did Zozma have to be a telepath? Useful at times, but horribly annoying at any other time. Must you insist on referring to Asellus as a young cat? She has a name, you know?


I then noticed that the mocking laughter of Zozma died down to a somber sigh. It almost seemed as if he was actually thinking. Actually, I've grown rather fond of your kitten and that's why I have the pet name for Asellus. It suits her anyway. The other reason is that it seems to tick you off for some reason. I suppose that there really is someone who can put a chip on that immaculate surface of yours.


A wry smile was all I could create before my features smoothed over into frigidity once again. Does it do you well to be so sardonic?


Ah... It's nice to know that I still have friends.


~*~


Stalking past the rain-covered landscape, a fluttering of black wings caught my sight. Kurai, my raven familiar, drifted down from the sky to land on my outstretched arm. What in the name of the Lord of All Mystics could be so important that Kurai feels to come to me? What ails you, Kurai?


Intelligent black eyes looked sorrowfully into mine, half with exhaustion and half with apology. Forgive me, my Prince, but Lord Rastaban bid me to fly to you. General Ciato had attacked him in cold blood to gain more power unto himself.


I knew that this was going to happen sooner or later. Orlouge must now know of the coup from Ciato. Orlouge now knows, doesn't he? Did he know of Ciato's attack on Rastaban?


Kurai nodded mournfully. Lord Orlouge had known indeed. In fact, it was he who had allowed the General to absorb the Black Knight's mystical energy. My message to my Lord is that General Ciato is to attack the Lady Asellus next. He has been sent to retrieve Lady Asellus at all costs, destroying everyone that comes in the way.


There are times in my mystic life in which I hate my ability to strategize and anticipate attacks. I allowed my green hair to cover my eyes, hiding them to the fact that I may have lost my best friend and may soon lose my student. It hadn't occurred to me until now that Zozma must have known of this event. Kurai, was Zozma anywhere near Chateau Aiguille while this was occurring?


Lord Ildon, in fact he was. Lord Zozma is the only reason why General Ciato did not reach the point where he had absorbed so much of Lord Rastaban's energy that he would disappear. Lord Zozma had attacked General Ciato in retribution for what the latter did to the Black Knight before seeking sanctuary with the Eternal Flame.


I let out the breath which I did not even know I was holding. All I knew was that I am rarely ever relieved by anything in my life, but this has to be one of those moments. Kurai, I ask you to return to Kurenai and make certain that Rastaban recovers. I need to search for Asellus once more.


My familiar took to the skies once again, but turned back for a moment. Will you be all right, my Prince? Is there a message you wish for me to send?


Closing my eyes and hoping that I'm not too late, I headed off to the Garden. Tell Rastaban that I am going to return as soon as I can--with Asellus--to defeat Charm Lord.


As you command. As Kurai was still disappearing into the horizon towards the region of Facinaturu, movement beyond the autumnal landscape of Kyo was already holding my attention. A red-clad, white-haired magician from the Magic Kingdom had his back turned towards me as he remained in deep conversation with another figure. I narrowed my gaze to catch a glimpse of the magician's companion, smiling slightly as I saw moonlight-colored skin and emerald hair. I finally found them. I finally found her.


"I don't really know when, where, and if anyone else is going to attack," whispered a feminine voice which I have not heard for what seemed like forever rather than a few days.


Another's unfamiliar voice answered her, confident but not without a tiny trace of arrogance. "We can only wait, I suppose. The first three had been nothing but mere shadows while that Princess Lion was quite powerful. Who we should be worried about is to whom those three shadows belong to."


I could catch a faint smile on the girl's lips, a little sad and yet a little amused. "Rouge, we already managed to get as many magical gifts as we could possibly get. I'm afraid that I really can't help you any further. I don't really want to put any other innocents in danger and--"


"Asellus, I already told you that I'm not leaving," replied Rouge. "It would be terrible of me to just up and leave when you have helped me so much. I have yet to repay my debt to you and I can't face my brother knowing that that would still be in my conscience."


The reply was a little pained. "Rouge..."


This was just getting to be too much... "You still fight like an amateur."


Two sets of crimson eyes turned to face me. I was slightly unnerved to find a human who had corundum-mystic eyes. "Ildon!!" Rouge stepped in front of Asellus, blocking her from my view as he outstretched his hands in my direction. However, I did notice a great hesitation in Asellus' face before she brought a finger to her lips.


"I never did know why you had to do that to summon Asura, Asellus," I asked mildly as I saw her draw blood and call upon her red weapon.


The magician named Rouge's brows furrowed into a glare as he looked about ready to cast a spell in my direction. "So you're the mystic named Ildon... are you next?"


White Rose's calm voice floated over the three of us. "Rouge, don't do anything rash. If Ildon was next, he would have already attacked you."


Asellus retracted Asura and gently moved Rouge out of the way. "Ildon... then what are you doing here?"


"Ciato got Rastaban. I came here to warn you that he's going to come after you next," I replied a little colder than I meant to. The fear in White Rose's face mirrored the same expression on the half-mystic's face. I can't really say that I blame them for feeling that way since I still haven't recovered from Kurai's news either.


"Did Rastaban disappear? Lord Orlouge would never have allowed such a thing to happen unless--" White Rose's face grew even paler than before. "No... how could he..."


Asellus and Rouge exchanged glances before the silver-haired mage left almost unwillingly. The magicians of the Magic Kingdom have always been infamous for being a little cold and self-possessed, but it amused me that Asellus had actually managed to gain the trust of one of them. "Orlouge allowed for it to happen. I'm sorry White Rose, but Kurai informed me that Charm Lord found out about the coup."


"And now he's after me by sending Ciato." White Rose and I turned to stare at Asellus who had her eyes hidden behind the curtain of her hair. "Sometimes I ask myself if all of this is worth it. Before, I would never even think about fighting even to save my life, but now it has become second nature to me."


Does that ever sound familiar? Other than Princess Lion, none of the other princesses have had any experience on a battlefield prior to their rebirth. It is only expected that they would not feel comfortable in knowing that they must learn to fight. "Darkness runs underneath all mystics, Asellus. In darkness, sadness is born. More so for us because of the chains we are bound in..."


White Rose smiled sadly before meeting my eyes, slightly disconcerting me with the plea present within them. Blinking, my features once again frosted over into a scowl when I realized what her entreaty was about. She knows that there is no way out for her. While the chains holding Asellus and me to the darkness are the strong ties of blood, the fetters of disgrace and fascination that holds on the White Princess are ones that cannot be ignored. Even now I hear within her voice what her eyes are trying to hide from me. "Ciato is next, is he not? I believed that Lord Orlouge would call upon him next upon my sister Lion's defeat."


"But what may be after Ciato?" My blue eyes just bored into hers to catch any slips of emotion she may let pass her barriers. It may be difficult to believe, but White Rose's defenses are as impenetrable, if not more so than mine. Her smiling face and cheerful demeanor only serve an even greater purpose as to mask her true feelings.


Before a slip could pass through White Rose's face, Asellus spoke up in an unquavering voice. I only noticed later on that even though her voice remained steady, the edge of exhaustion present on its edges betrayed how all of this was taking a toll on her. "We could worry about that when it happens. Right now, all we can do is to keep on fighting until all of this ceases to pass. I'm just sorry that I had to drag all of you into this. Now Orlouge is hunting for you too."


That was not surprising that she said that at all. What truly surprised me was the fierce smile that grew in my face. "Asellus, it is better to fight Orlouge of our own will and disappear rather than serve Charm Lord and hate it every second of the eternity."


White Rose smiled slightly before walking away. "I'll see the two of you later. Mesarthim and Silence are calling for me."


When she left, I simply stood against a tree and ruffled my charge's hair. "Stop blaming yourself."


"Why did you stay behind in Facinaturu when we left, Ildon?" The pale face looked up at me from beneath green hair.


How else could I answer that? I just repeated the same words that I used to answer Rastaban from before. "No mystic can completely escape the claws of Charm Lord, Asellus. The only way to do so is to commit suicide as Princess Rei had done. I had to stay behind to stall for time until the two of you could leave. Rastaban believed that only you could cure Facinaturu of its present illness, and I for one am starting to believe him."


"Why do you follow me now? Just because of Rastaban's orders?" asked Asellus, red eyes wide with fear and uncertainty. "You are going to be in more danger if you go with me."


"A risk I'm more than willing to take. And I'm going to give you your final lesson as of this moment," I said as I crossed my arms, ruffling several of my feathers against the tree. "I ask you to understand one thing, Asellus. Before you came, mystics such as White Rose, Rastaban, and I have already been living within the confines of the castle for hundreds upon hundreds of years. I had it easier than most of the others due to the fact that I was Orlouge's Messenger. Most of the others are never allowed out of the Chateau Aiguille. Charm Lord is that possessive when it comes to what he marks as his and his alone. Even now, he still believes that he owns us, including you."


"I see what you mean," said the half-mystic before sitting down and focusing her full attention on me.


"It is easy to see that detail about Charm Lord when you are finally a mystic. Most of us know of that imperfection but most fail to act upon it due to their fascination of him. There are some cases though--such as Princess Rei--who have broken free of the spell and start to yearn for their freedom. It is unfortunate that only she has managed to be completely free." I was broken off by the confused expression on her face.


"Completely free? Do you mean that there are others who are free but not completely?" The strange look in her eyes betrayed her utter confusion in the matter.


To answer her question, I raised a gloved hand and pointed it over my chest to signify that I am one. "I'm a little surprised that the matter is so confusing to you. After all, you have several of them in your entourage now."


Silence greeted me as my charge thought it over. "You are talking about White Rose, Silence, Mesarthim, Zozma, and yourself, aren't you?"


"You have met Zozma and Silence now." It was not a question. "These two once had high positions in Charm Lord's council, but they have rebelled against him and left Facinaturu. I recall that they never regretted their decisions for treason. I have to warn you that Zozma is a telepath. He informed me that he has been unable to read your mind, but it is better to be safe."


Shut up, Ildon. Now I'll have to retract my claws and lick my wounds in a more sociable place. We'll meet again soon, Kitten.


A small trace of a grin appeared on Asellus' face. "I already know. That's why I made certain that the backlashes of my attacks extended at a certain radius as I was fighting Golden Lion. The others of my team remained unscathed by my hand, but Zozma never knew what was coming to him."


Ildon, remind me to get a collar for her next time.


"You have controlled your techniques to that extent?" Shaking my head, I tried to hide the smile that was valiantly trying to weave its way in my lips. When I finally got myself under control, I moved on with the lesson. "Zozma may be the only mystic who has always been seemingly happy all of the time. From the very beginning, he left and returned to Facinaturu when he felt like it--much to the chagrin and amusement of Orlouge. Everyone thinks that that was a factor that shaped him up to what he is today. Mystics live by deceiving themselves and showing their beautiful sides to the world. We didn't know that only destiny could impose upon us, until now. You and Zozma are the only mystics who never needed to lie to yourselves because you never learned to fear or to cower in someone's presence."


Even her whisper had the strains of a spell--a spell of Fascination. "But I'm afraid--"


"Do not be afraid that you would put all of us in danger," I attempted to arrange her disheveled hair into some sort of order. "At the risk of my life, you'll get back whatever you lose from now on."


"But why would all of you risk so much for me?"


It is because you are our future, Kitten. We fight to believe in the future and that is why we stay alive. Ildon told me that if he had to cross a frozen bridge if life is risked, he would run across it. It's a seemingly random question with many answers, but you are our future. Amazingly, he answered me correctly. Had he flown over, he would have only been able to go by himself. Had he walked, the bridge may have been too unstable to support for long. That is why he and all of us would run--no believing in chances and no deception. We are going over that bridge now and we must reach the other end.


The two of us couldn't help but stare. "I thought that you already left, Zozma."


"Asellus, I don't think that's Zozma. He certainly talked a lot like the mystic, but he would never say anything which actually made some sort of sense." I heard Zozma snort in irritation.


Was that actually an attempt at humor by the Black Wing? You think of me too low.


Asellus turned back to me before pointing to the Port. "I think that we should be going now. White Rose must have told everyone that you will be joining us from now on. And I think that I would like to spar with you again later."


"I am looking forward to it," I replied as I matched her stride for stride. "But before that, allow me to ask you some of my own questions."


Silk and steel have returned to her voice, comforting me a little when the edge of exhaustion had disappeared without a trace. "Like what?"


Thinking for a moment, I searched my mind for those questions which have been tormenting me for the longest time. "When all of this is over, how do you plan to stay?"


Crimson eyes pinned me in place. "How do I plan--to stay?"


"Yes, isn't that what you have been fighting for all of this time? Will you do as Princess Rei had done and turn human once again, would you take over as the new Charm Lord, or are you going to remain as you are?" The idea of the first two made a small shiver run down my spine.


Her eyes clouded over as she looked at her pale hands. "I--never really thought about it. I don't really want to lose the friends I have right now but I also don't want to risk becoming as Orlouge is. Perhaps I will wait until all of this is over to decided what I really wish to be."


A logical answer. "However did you manage to befriend a magician from the Magic Kingdom? I would ask you how did you defeat Princess Lion, but it seems that this is a weightier task."


Time stopped when she did not answer. For the first time ever, I heard a sound which floated through the air and wove itself around my senses much like the fragrance of a rose. Asellus was actually laughing at me. Laughter is not forbidden in Chateau Aiguille, but the honest timbre in the sound would make Charm Lord ban such laughter from Facinaturu. Honesty does not mix with deception, but within this girl who has been thrown in the world in which she does not belong, everything and anything is conceivable.


Everyone is quick to feign indifference...


But people can change.


~*~


to be continued...



Notes:


~Hideaki: *gasps in shock and backs away from the computer* Wow, Asura. This was actually a record for you. *looks at the calendar*

~Asura: *glares darkly and waits* Thanks... I think. I noticed that if you put my fanfics in this order: "No Words Are Enough," "Awakening," and "It's Only Forever," you pretty much have the entirety and more of Asellus' quest. Note though, that they all stand alone. Probably my next fanfic would--

~Hideaki: *cuts her off* --be to finish "It's Only Forever"!

~Asura: ...... you're right.

~Hideaki: Another shocker for today, Asura actually agreed with me! Hey Kamll, Biyouki, Asura actually agreed with me!! *goes off in a daze*
~The next part would consist of the battle with Ciato and the Dark Labyrinth--perhaps it will be the last part. After all, this is getting pretty long, contrary to what I may have said in the first parts of this fanfic.

~Hideaki: As long as you keep writing, I'll be satisfied. Now get to work on the next part.

~Asura: *eyes widen before getting back in front of her computer* Somebody stop this slave driver of a Muse!!