Yet More Random Things
Authors note: well I'd like to thank the author, A.K.A Anonymous for letting me use some of her bumper stickers. I didn't use all of them because you people have to have a reason to go read the rest, no? I also changed some of them so there's another reason to go read hers! The title for her fic is, Gundam Wing Bumper Stickers. Do a search on it in the upper, right hand corner of the screen. Hers is better because she even had a car for each g-boy! So go read it! After you read mine of course! Well here goes!
Bumper stickers
Heero
Laws are like bones; they're made to be broken.
And,
Omea o Korosu. Have a nice day.
And,
Hobbies include: guns, assassination, and death threats to Relena.
And,
Don't use force; use a bigger gun
And,
Guns don't kill people, I do.
.
And this one was given to me by NitroGlycerin89
Calculate how many times you honked at me and expect that many bullets in your chest.
Duo
You have just been passed by the God of Death!
And,
Anyone who tries to pass me has got a date with his maker.
Trowa
Live teddy bears are the best.
And,
Speak softly, but carry an M16
Quatre
I have crossed and re-crossed the line between sanity and madness so many times I've all but rubbed it out.
And,
Don't drive under the influence of the ZERO System; the life you save may be your own.
Wufei
Drive or get off the road, weaklings.
And,
Speed limits are injustice!
Zechs
Caution: Driver tried to blow up Earth, please don't honk.
Dorothy
Oh, sure it's all fun and games until I stab you.
All g-boys
My other vehicle is a Gundam.
And,
Drive defensively: buy a Gundam
And,
I helped save the world, no really!
And,
It's only pointless if you walk away without blowing something up.
And,
Public Safety Announcement: you don't want o see me angry.
And,
Don't like my driving? Call 714-579-0864 (ßZechs' pager #)
Authors note: well that's it for the bumper stickers! That means I'm out of bumper stickers once again so it's up to you to think of more if you want another chapter! Okay, now we'll do the answering machine messages!
Answering machine messages
Duo
Hi! I can't answer the phone right now. Bob, that's my pet parakeet, just swallowed cherry bomb. It wasn't lit, but I have to get him to the bathroom. Uh-oh! (Sound of something exploding)
And,
Hello, I'm not here right now. In fact, I'm out getting a new parakeet. If you leave a message after the beep I'll get back to you.
And,
I can't come to the phone right now. Heero and I are trying to stuff a body in the trunk. I think we're going to have to size it a little… (Aside-) HEY HEEERO! GET THE CHAINSAW! Anyway, leave a message and if I like it, you'll hear from me. If not, you'll hear from Heero. (Laughter)
And,
My time is billed at $125 per hour. Please begin your message with your MasterCard or Visa number, card type, and date of expiration. I'll get back to you pending credit approval.
And,
Hi! You've reached my Fun Phone Line, where you can talk to my answering machine for only $0.95 per minute! Please leave your credit card number at the tone.
And,
CREAMED ASPARAGUS! Beep.
And,
I didn't take a shower today, and I might not take one tomorrow. So if you don't leave a message you might have to deal with me in person!
And,
(Heero's voice) Duo has been captured by flying saucers and can't come to the phone right now, but it you leave your name, phone number, and a message, I'll have him call you back as soon as he escapes. Read all about it in next weeks National Enquirer.
Heero
Hello, this is Duo! I don't live here so if you were trying to call me you have the wrong number. On the other hand if you were trying to call Heero, please leave your name and number at the beep. Now I'm not promising he'll call you back, only that I won't…unless I get really bored…
Trowa
Hello, you've reached your local circus. Do you like animals? We are experiencing severe problems with our hot water. Would you be so kind as to allow us to bring out elephants over to your bathroom for a shower?
Authors note: well that's it! I've run out of stuff! I have no more! If you want another chapter then you'll have think up more answering machine messages and bumper stickers on you own and send them to me at, Christian.m.hall@att.net
Till Next Time
~Bishonen Chaser~
