Disclaimer: The characters I use in this story are owned by George Lucas.
To the plot: The story takes place during and after Return of the Jedi.
There might be spoilers for Episode 3 since I refer to an old script where Padmé was called Arcadia and to a new still not official script. You are warned!
Any comments or critizism may be mailed to DarthVader_1401@hotmail.com
Enjoy!
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Another fate...
Padmé sat in her chamber. She was alone, only her thoughts were with her.
Thoughts of grief, sorrow, but a last glimpse of hope.
In all those years she had been here now, she had not given up hope.
They had taught her not to...
When she came to this place, her only wish was to die.
But in eternity you can't die. You die once. In your life.
More than twenty years had passed since her death.
Although she could have been happy here with nearly all of her friends surrounding her, she wasn't.
Everybody knew why.
Padmé did not know what had happened to her love, Anakin.
If he was dead, who would know if he did enter eternity or suffer in hell forever?
She washed the last thought away, she couldn't stand it.
Somebody told her after him turning into a Sith she had the right to slap him.
Her shock was too big to react. However, she should have punched that person instead.
A piece of her heart was missing, but he would keep it safe, and bring it back to her, if only he could.
Memories of her death filled once again her mind.
Everything she longed for then was redemption.
However, she didn't want to leave her daughter without any knowledge or love of her real mother. Leia, their daughter, a sign of their love.
A thousand times she had questioned herself if it was right to separate her from her twin brother Luke.
But another decision bothered her even more, did she really maintain the right to hide them from their father?
Especially after the happenings of her death she asked herself these questions.
FLASHBACK
It had been three years.
Three years since she hadn't seen her husband, her real husband.
She was living on Alderaan as the wife of Bail Organa.
Padmé had tried to move on with her life, but in the eyes of her daughter Leia she saw her past.
Her past with a man she once deeply loved. And still did.
He was dead.
But in some way he wasn't.
He lived.
He still lived under the armor of Darth Vader.
Obi-Wan had asked her not to think that her husband still existed.
Only a handfull of people knew who Vader really was. Padmé had felt it, felt that her husband lived under the mask of the deadly Darth Vader.
Anakin Skywalker was a Sith Lord now, the dark side flooded him, gave him power, strength, might.
Padmé blamed herself that she had not seen his change.
But who would choose a marriage with a former queen over the reign of the galaxy?
Everything she felt was that she wanted him back, her Anakin.
Although she knew better.
If you are once being seduced by the dark side and your only feeling is hate, how can you be converted then?
The questions hurt Padmé since she didn't know an answer.
She didn't know how he could turn his back to her and leave and never come back and never come looking for her.
Tears welled up in her eyes.
A rational voice told her not to mix up the facts.
Anakin left with Obi-Wan to go on a crusade. He had promised to come back, as he had always.
However, she should have seen the signs.
Master Kenobi had asked her not to reveal her pregnancy to her husband because he wasn't sure if he was still a Jedi or already a Sith.
She questioned herself if it was right to go that far, but she believed Anakin's master since he spent more time with him.
When Obi-Wan returned, she felt death and misery entering her house over the door-step.
A single look in his face had told her.
Her first reaction was pure shock, the other was hitting Kenobi with her hand.
Then she fell to her knees and began to sob and burst into tears.
She wanted to follow Anakin as she had promised.
Today she knew that he had somehow survived the fall into the lava pit and since then he had been the emperor's most deadly tool.
It was also his fault. He had seduced Anakin. Yoda once told her before he was left behind on Dagobah that they had all underestimated the influence of Palpatine.
Padmé made up her mind that Anakin had to wear a mask and a shiny armor to keep his body functioning.
He was imprisoned.
Even if he chose to be a Jedi again, he couldn't.
The Jedi said that if you are once consumed with hate, you couldn't be turned.
But if love can become hate, why couldn't hate become love then?
It were her Anakin's lungs that Vader breathed through.
It were her Anakin's eyes that Vader looked through.
It was her Anakin's heart that pounded in Vader's chest.
And yet, Vader was not her Anakin.
Her handmaidens had told her that she was so thin.
Yes, she was. Her hands were bony, her skin light, showing the veins.
She didn't possess the power to kill herself fast.
Leia should feel that she had a mother who cared about her.
Life on Alderaan was peaceful, the garden reminded her on Naboo.
She would have loved to stay there, but Obi-Wan was right in saying that it would be too dangerous.
The emperor might come looking for her, but as it seemed he didn't see her as a threat.
To shield herself from the outer world she also had to drop her occupation as a senator.
Right now she was outside the palace and devoured the afternoon sun and smelled the sweet scent of blossomed flowers. Nearby she heard Leia giggle.
Why didn't Vader himself come looking for her she kept asking herself again and again.
He had been here. But only for diplomatic purposes. Not because of her.
Temptation overcame her to look for him while he stayed, but she could withstand knowing of the danger she would put Leia in. And Bail of course.
Who knows what that damn Palpatine might have told her husband.
Suddenly the sun went dark.
Padmé opened her eyes in shock to see a large group of ships approaching.
In reflex she hurried over to Leia, grabbed her by the waist and ran into the palace.
Only seconds later Alderaan was under attack- by the Imperial Forces.
Bail was relieved to see his wife and daughter enter unharmed.
"What is going on? Why are they firing at us?" She shouted.
"I have no idea. Go into the shelter."
"No. I want to know who leads the attack." Bail knew her all too well. In the past three years her eyes hadn't changed- they still had Anakin in them.
The same moment Stormtroopers conquered the building and opened fire.
Padmé shielded her daughter, carried her then in the direction of the shelter.
Bail guaranteed her save passage.
On her way she stopped to grab a weapon.
"Mommy, what is happening here?"
"Don't be afraid, honey, there's nothing going to happen to you."
An attacker shot at them, hitting her hard on the shoulder.
She had to struggle not to let her daughter fall down. "MOMMY!"
Sounds of fire and her pleading child echoed in her ears.
With a last strain of strength she collected herself and armed her gun at the trooper who was coming towards her. A single shot and he stumbled and fell.
They approached it.
Her handmaidens saw her exhaustion and came hurrying taking Leia.
Suddenly Bail entered in a hurry, having paniced eyes.
"He is here. Vader is here."
Bail knew who he really was. Padmé had told him after some time. Everybody else believed Anakin was dead.
Her breathing stopped for a moment. "He has come for me."
He knew what she was up to. "Don't go. You don't have to face him. He isn't allowed to do this attack, diplomatic protocols protect us. The empire has to pay for this."
But he felt that his words had no effect on her, she had already made her decision.
"He would return. I don't want to be a constant threat to your planet and I don't want to play hide and seek with him. I'm sorry Bail."
She bent down and kissed Leia on the forehead. Under upwelling tears she whispered to her daughter: "Never forget me, honey. And become a strong girl. I love you."
She embraced her with the last strength left. "Mum, where are you going? Will you come back?"
"I'll always be with you." She tipped softly with her finger on Leia's chest where her heart beat.
"Vader is coming into this direction."
Little Leia was too young to understand all the conflicts and connections, but one name stayed in her memory: Vader.
Her mother embraced her a last time before leaving her daughter, handmaidens and husband behind. She knew she was weak. At least to the outside. Her body felt limp as she wandered through the corridors of the palace. It was like a final walk.
She sensed coldness, deadly coldness coming crawling around the corner.
It hit her with a power she hadn't expected, but there was still something familiar about it; therefore, she felt no fear. To a stranger this aura must have seamed like death.
Then she saw him.
He stood there, taller than she had remembered him, his dark mask reflecting the last sun-beams, which made him look like a precious knight in a shiny armor. Indeed, he was a Lord.
She stepped before him, closing the distance up to a few inches.
Her face turned towards his masked one, now able to see it at close range.
It was like a skull, designed to scare the people.
But not her. He might look like the reaper and spread the same aura, but some part in her kept telling her that there was still her Anakin inside this Cyborg.
Their silence was pierced by his mechanical breathing. She tried to see if he reacted to her at all.
If only she could see his eyes, they would tell her about the struggle in him, because he wasn't speaking, too.
"It's good you hand yourself out." His voice was so deep, and it sounded mechanical, too.
"You have no right to be here and you know!" She blurted out.
"Do you have a right to be here?" He shot back.
"Where else should I be?" It was a silent reproach.
"Where do you want to be?" Did he read her mind?
"Can you answer my questions with answers instead of other questions?" Yes, she was a politician, her tongue was more trained than his.
"Don't you think it's a shame we meet under these circumstances?"
The first time during their talk she looked to the ground. He still saw them as a 'we'.
She regained her posture and also her tone she used to have as a queen. "I'm sorry to disappoint you, but you aren't the man I remember marrying." Padmé should have known better than teasing a Sith Lord. Even if he was her own husband. However, she didn't want to show to him that she still considered him as Anakin, the man she was married to and loved from the depth of her heart.
Too late she realized how offensive the last sentence was.
When he spoke, his voice was even colder than before. "Then you won't be treated with the respect my wife would have been treated with."
With those final words he grabbed her by the arm and pulled her with him. He had seen how weak she was. Seen her emaciated cheeks where her round and healthy face had been, seen the pale and light skin, where she had been dark tanned. And he had seen the injury coming from a laser weapon, though he had ordered to use narcotization only.
Anakin questioned himself what he had done to her, but soon Vader told him that it was her own fault. She had believed in that fool Obi-Wan.
Padmé followed him as fast as she could, the grip on her arm hurt but she kept silent. Somehow she felt dizzy.
Vader stopped. He eyed her which she ,of course, could not see. Her face looked even paler than before. "You are wrong."
"About what?" With difficulty she kept herself from collapsing.
"He is still alive. Or don't you remember what he once promised you? He'll never be a Sith as long as you are with him."
"But you belong to the dark side!"
"Indeed, I do. Because I thought you were dead."
This revelation shocked her. She was too stunned to speak.
"The emperor told me you are dead, betrayed and killed by the Jedi. I believed him until I felt your presense on Alderaan."
"W-why should the Jedi kill me?"
"Because they saw you as the reason for me turning into a Sith."
It made sense to her. It did- but that meant, that he had killed the remaining Jedi only to revenge her death, as he had killed the Tuskens when he had found out that they were responsible for his mother's death.
The world spun around. She couldn't keep her balance anymore. She fainted from exhaustion, everything turned black.
Bail had watched the scene from secure distance and now he saw how his wife was falling- falling to the ground. Right to the foot of the dark lord, her real husband.
But then something unexpectedely happened: He hurried to catch her before her soft body touched the hard stone.
He carried her away, to his shuttle.
At this moment Bail knew that he would never see the love of his life again. She was finally where she belonged- at the side of her real husband.
However, the question what he would do to her bothered him. If he did not kill her, then the emperor would.
Padmé was disorientated. Strange things surrounded her, she saw a bright light at the end of the dark tunnel. She screamed for help, screamed for Anakin.
Then suddenly the light was gone and pure darkness was with her. Had he abandoned her?
Suddenly she felt the touch of a soothing hand, the one she had missed for three years.
She calmed down.
Slowly she opened her eyes to see she was on a starship, an Imperial starship.
Next to her bed sat the Dark Lord... Anakin... he must have touched her through the force to wake her up. But the touch had been intimate, not altered through the dark side, which meant that his heart still possessed love and was not completely consumed with hate.
She tried to rise, but that attempt was unsuccessfull because of her weakness.
"You need rest to regain your health."
"Health for what?"
He was a little shocked by her expression. "Health to live."
"I have given up my life three years ago."
He paused for a moment before he spoke. "I had done so, too, but the dark side told me to fight. To fight the betrayers."
"What has the emperor done to you?"
"He saved me."
"No. He is the real liar. He betrayed you by telling you about my death. He achieved his goal."
"The Jedi are the betrayers, they didn't bother about slavery on Tatooine and didn't care about taking a little boy away from his mother. They are selfish."
"Anakin, you know what you're saying is not true!"
"Never call me Anakin again."
"It is your real name. If you didn't remember than I wouldn't be alive anymore."
"You know me too well. No wonder my master wants you dead."
She thought. "And who is going to execute me?"
"I am only a messenger. He is aware of the fact that I am unable to harm you."
"Why did you come to Alderaan?" The question was nearly a whisper.
"Having felt your presence on the planet left me restless. Although I'm a Sith I can't control my thoughts when I'm near you."
The image of their first kiss flashed through her mind. Why did this have to hurt so much? A knot in her throat kept her from speaking. The man right in front of her didn't just seem to be Anakin, it was her Anakin. She had to fight back upwelling tears, not wanting to show any sign of regret in her eyes.
The only thing she managed to say, was: "You can't deny you're still Anakin. I know you are."
His voice seemed to crack up, too. "And I know you still consider me as your husband."
They stared at each other for a long time. They were so close but yet so far apart.
She spoke in a desperate, low voice. "Why? Did you ever ask yourself why we have to endure this? And how long it will be going on?"
"It is my destiny. But there is still light at the end of the tunnel."
She managed to sit up. "Your destiny?! I tell you what. I am part of your destiny! Have you ever thought about the consequences of your acting?"
"I knew you were a queen once. A queen who lived in wealth. After our marriage we were poor, you couldn't wear those fine garments any more. I came to the conclusion that as long as I stayed a Jedi, we would live in poverty; therefore, I made my decision."
"It didn't bother that I couldn't wear expensive dresses and had to live the life of a simple woman. Everything that was important to me was you!"
"I wanted to make you happy. Now let me tell you something: I could survive without this helmet, I could survive without this armor if only my heart was totally consumed with hate. But there is still a place in my heart that will never be evil. You. You stand to yourself, have ever and will ever. Maybe that will save me someday."
She nodded in agreement. After a long pause, she asked: "When are we going to arrive?"
"In the morning. Around 10 hours."
"My death is sealed?" Having met him again made it even harder to leave soon.
"He will ask you if you desire to serve for the empire."
She gave him a sad look since they both knew she would never betray herself. "You know that I won't..."
"Yes. And it upsets me and bothers me. When you are gone there is nothing left of me, of my former self. That idealistic fool Obi-Wan is hiding somewhere, but I hate him. If I ever see him again, he will be dead! But you... you are my last reminder on Anakin Skywalker. When you are gone, then he will be gone, too."
If only you knew... she whispered to herself. Leia, she has your features... and Luke, he already had your eyes and smile when he was born. "Then fight it! Fight the emperor! You are the only one who can kill him. And he knows it! He knows that you're the chosen one, chosen to restore the peace in the galaxy."
"Without him, I wouldn't be alive anymore."
"Without him we would still be living on Naboo." The thought hurt her.
"I can't betray my master."
She put all her eggs in one basket. "So he's more important to you than I am?"
"No, but he's my master. He showed me power, might."
"Are these your only concerns? You simply wish to rule the galaxy?"
"Stop questioning my motives!" He had gotten up from his seat and the light reflected in his dark eyes. For a brief moment she was afraid.
"Have you ever been a slave? Have you ever lost your mother twice in your life? Have you ever lost your whole identity? And have you ever lost your wife because of the persons you trusted?"
"Anakin..." she stammered.
"I know the last part is not true, but it will be true. I was so naïve to think the emperor was honest, now he's going to kill you because he sees you as a threat to my loyality. And he is correct. With you persuading my mind I'm willing to slaughter him only to save you. But I'm not strong enough, not yet." He had turned his back to her and now watched the stars. The black cape made him seem even taller then he originally was. Everybody feared him.
She searched for words. "W-what kind of occupation would the emperor give me?"
He seemed surprised and turned his head to look at her. His breathing cut the silence between them. "You would only stay for me. I don't want that. Acting against your will, you would be more upset day by day."
"True." She blurted out. "Since the day you left I had to act against my heart and died piece by piece."
He walked over to her bed, puzzled by her words not knowing their meaning.
"You hide yourself behind this... this mask, this identity. I want to rip it off and get to see your face! Your eyes! Your emotions! I want my Anakin back!" She burst into tears but buried her face in her tiny hands.
He had never seen her this desperate. She was a diplomat. They were taught not to show their emotions, but this break-down made him see what he had really done to her.
Suddenly she felt a touch on her shoulder and slowly looked up to see Vader's mask only inches away.
In his dark, throaty voice he whispered: "Do you have the slightest idea how much I hated this armour the first time after my recovery? I need to be fast to be a good Sith, but this thing imprisons me, I had to start at zero. And the mask- the mask is meant to hide who I really am. And it's meant to scare- scare everybody away so nobody gets to know my dark secret. The secret of Anakin Skywalker."
Although she couldn't see his eyes, she felt them burning into her. The same intense gaze he used to give her. Slowly she passed her hand over the dark shiny outside of his mask.
"Please", she whispered, "don't scare me away, for I still want to be near you." She stopped. "I love you." With that she lay her arms around him into a deep embrace.
He returned the gesture.
Hours later they walked over the ship. They walked side by side like equals, not like watcher and prisoner. Padmé had wanted to see his world.
To the crew it must have seemed odd- the dark lord and next to him a woman. A woman more than a head smaller than him, tiny and fragile. Yet, he treated her like a treasure.
And she didn't seem to be afraid. Everybody on the entire ship feared Vader. Not only because of his appearance but also because he treated those who disappointed him very ungentle.
A smile played on her face as she saw the people eyeing them.
Vader on the other hand was surprised by his wife's good mood. He had missed her all this time. Her smile, her melodic voice, her dark eyes, her touch, her presence. Now she was there, but not for long. He could guess what the emperor had in mind.
"What are they thinking?"
Her looked down at her only to see her smile. "They are curious. Curious what a woman like you is doing at my side. They want to know why I treat you so well."
"Somebody got the idea?"
"Not yet." He turned his head to one man who was sitting near helm control. "That one, I should keep an eye on him."
"Why?"
"He thinks I am a monster."
Padmé gave him a shocked expression, but he soothed her.
"That's the common believe." He stopped. "Yes, some fools came up with the idea that you might be something special to me."
He called them fools. At least they shared the same opinion in this matter. "Do you think they might use me as a threat against you?"
"Try it and meet death. Nobody will harm you, Padmé."
"What will the emperor do to me?"
He lowered his head and seemed to think. "I'm not sure. I'm sorry that I'll not be able to save you."
"I understand that you can't betray your master. If you do so, he won't trust you and you will never be able to defeat him."
Her own well-being never really mattered to her as long as the people were satisfied. Sometimes he had hated this character trait. Right now, he damned it.
On the contrary she showed with the gesture that she trusted him and believed in his abilities.
They entered a lift which brought them into the emperor's chamber. He sat in his 'throne' and eyed them suspiciously.
"I had no doubt you would bring her to me."
"Yes, master."
They walked up the stairs and stopped in front of him.
"Padmé Naberrie. I always thought you were a good senator. What has happened to you in the last three years?"
She questioned herself how she could have voted for him to be chancelor. "I was occupied with my own interests."
He grinned evilly. "What a pity we had to lose you."
"I couldn't have stopped the ongoing ruin of the republic."
"Yes. You couldn't have. You didn't possess the might. Maybe I can give you might."
She waited for him to speak further.
"The empire needs good politicians."
"I'm sorry emperor Palpatine, but I will never serve for the empire."
He rested for a few minutes. "Think what that would mean... Always being close to your dear husband..."
"Why do you try to get me with that? You lied to Anakin that I was dead. And right now you want me to stay?"
He laughed. "You have not lost your abilities. But think of it: You could rule the galaxy together, lord and lady Vader."
"Pardon me if I have to disappoint you, but I will not work for something I have tried to destroy."
He studied her face. "I feel that you still have passionate emotions for your husband. But if you refuse to support us, then your destiny is sealed." He got up from his throne but Padmé didn't back away.
"You will never fully convert him to the dark side, never. Love is stronger than hatred."
He appeared to be touched. "Really?! I never thought of you being so naïve, dear Amidala."
She fell to her knees when the first rays of the Sith Lightening hit her body.
Vader tried to remain calm, but the sign of his wife in pain and struggling with death made him mad. He wanted to save her, but he had to be loyal to his master...
Padmé had closed her eyes but screamed because of the agony. She felt as if she was burning... her whole body was eaten away by the flames.
Suddenly it stopped. She opened her eyes to see Vader standing before her. But his technical body system couldn't handle the shock of the lightening, so he fell to the ground, his breathing sounded strange, as if damaged. She tried to crawl to his side, but collapsed before everything turned black. The laughing of the emperor echoed in her ears.
She heard voices. Voices she had never heard before.
Reality had to sink in before she opend her eyes.
She was weak and memory didn't come to her fast.
The light from a sun caused pain. She was on a planet.
Slowly she recoginzed the shape of the outer world. This must be some kind of lab.
An attempt to rise was diminished by sudden pain hitting her body.
Somebody she didn't know approached. It was a doctor.
"Please lay still. You are weak."
She nodded. "Where am I?"
"On Coruscant. Don't ask further."
"A last question: Where is Ana-..." she corrected herself. "Lord Vader?"
He didn't answer and she feared the worst.
Suddenly she heard a voice she hadn't heard for three years and it made her heart jump.
The doctor backed away and she could see a man entering.
She didn't recognize him from the start, because his skin was pale, nearly white and he lacked hair.
"Anakin..." she whispered. He stopped before her bed and asked the doctor something which she couldn't hear.
Then he seated himself next to her bed and took her hand.
"Anakin, why did you try to save me?"
"Padmé, I had at least to try to save you."
"Where is your helmet?"
"My Body System collapsed and the doctors and Coruscant had to repair it. I told them to leave me without mask so you could see my eyes."
She smiled at the gesture. "I will die?"
He lowered his head. "I'm afraid so."
She studied his face. As he realized it, he looked away. "Don't... you are no monster, Annie. You are still my love."
She felt it. Death crawled into her, her body got limp, her weakness increased. He must have also felt it.
"Angel, please, don't leave me!" He took her face into his hands and forced her to see in his eyes.
Padmé was touched, his eyes were shiny, wet, he was desperate.
Her hand came up to his face and carress his chin. She signaled him to get closer. "I will wait for you."
"I love you..." he whispered before their lips met for the last kiss in their life.
Everything around her went white, flooded with light when she left her body to live forever.
FLASHBACK END
Somebody knocked on her door.
"Come in." She got up.
"Hello Padmé."
"Master Kenobi, how nice to see you." He was older now, around 60, not the fiery young Yedi she had remembered him from her life.
"I wanted to check on you, how are you doing?"
"I'm fine. Your face tells me that something has happened."
"Although you aren't a Yedi you can read my mind." They sat on a near-by sofa.
"Please, it has something to do with Anakin, hasn't it?"
"Yes. I just spoke with Luke. They know they're father and son. Your son is angry that I didn't tell him the truth."
"It was unevitable." Padmé smiled. "What about Leia?"
"Only Luke knows of her true identity, but I think that Anakin senses something, too."
"And Leia herself? I'm so jealous that you can see them and I can't..."
"She looks like you. The same brown eyes, the same temper... And it seems that she also has found love in a young rebel called Han Solo."
"What type of man is he?"
"Oh, he can be handsome. They are both stubborn." Suddenly he paused. "Somehow I see you and Anakin in them. She is a princess, he is a gifted young man with nothing in his pockets but himself. I'm sorry to remind you on your happy times."
"They will return, and don't excuse yourself. There isn't a second I don't think about Ani."
"So am I. Those what-if questions bother me, what if I could have prevented it? Then you would be a happy family by now."
"Don't blame yourself. Somehow I sense that the Skywalker family is predestinated to suffer..."
"Maybe not any longer. If Luke succeeds, you will be at rest."
"You forget about the emperor. He holds all strings in his deadly hands."
"Yes. I'm too full of fear to look into the future..."
"But you believe in Luke, don't you?"
"Yes. He is the son of the Skywalker and Anakin was strong when he was a Jedi."
"As a Sith he was even more powerful. He killed the Jedi." *Because of me...*
"Yes, it was the emperor's goal to eleminate them. But your husband wasn't this dumb. Without a reason he wouldn't have..."
"It was because of me..." she interrupted him. "He wanted revenge on my death."
"But you died through the Imperial Forces and because of your weakness."
"I know. Palpatine had lied to Anakin. He told him that the Jedi betrayed me and killed me."
Obi-Wan looked concerned. "And he trusted in this story?"
"Whom would you trust if you have just been saved by the emperor..."
"And nearly been killed during a lightsaber duel with an old friend. Yes, it makes sense." He inhaled deeply.
"I'm sorry I didn't tell you that."
"No. The past still hurts. Both of us."
There was a long silence, before she spoke."Something else bothers you, do you want to share it with me?"
"When Luke left, his destination was his father. He desires to turn him back on the good side of the Force."
The former senator reacted in shock. Anakin could not be turned to the good side anymore, she knew that. He was emprisoned in the armour of Vader, the only way to convert him, was to kill him.
"No, Obi-Wan, this can't be true. Luke can't kill his own father!"
"He is not going to murder him, he wants to save him."
"Do you think, that Ani will...?"
"No, but I fear that the emperor might kill Luke if he won't convert to the dark side."
"And the only thing we can do is wait..."
"Yes. I'm sorry not to bring you better news."
"If Luke turns to the dark side, Anakin would be no use to the emperor anymore."
He nodded. "And I presume that your husband knows so, too."
Padmé stared at the window. "He was the chosen one..."
"No, he still is the chosen one, who will restore the peace in the galaxy."
"Let's hope this prophecy comes true."
Obi-Wan got up from his place and headed for the door. "The other Jedi and me, we will wait together. Shmi is also with us and you may join us, too."
"Yes, thanks." He left the room.
"Ani, I believe in you. You aren't just the emperor's tool." she whispered.
FLASHBACK
Two years had passed since their marriage.
They were a happy couple, both busy with their jobs, but never forgetting about the dearest one.
Then, one day, Padmé came back from a doctor having the best news in the world.
To her astonishment it wasn't Anakin who waited in their home for her, but Obi-Wan, his master.
"Hello, Kenobi, what brings you to us? My husband is not at home apparently."
"Yes, I know and I want to talk to you in private."
"What's wrong?"
"Me and the Jedi council are very concerned about my padawan. We fear he might take the fast path."
"And become a Sith? No, you misjudge him."
"Did he behave strange in the past?"
"He was a little bit more aggressive, but not towards me."
"I am afraid of your well-being."
She realized how concerned he was. "Obi-Wan, Anakin will never turn against me, never!"
"What makes you so sure?"
"Because we love each other, there's a bond between us that not even the Jedi nor the Sith can break."
"Please, I'm just trying to help. We have seen this change in other Jedi."
"But Ani isn't a simple Jedi. You know and I know. He might dress as one, but he doesn't behave as one."
"Yes. But I sense his anger, which grows day by day. I'm simply afraid of you. When you were 14 years old I promised to protect you, now, you are 26 and I still follow that promise."
"I-I'm sorry, Obi-Wan. I'm just a little tensed myself."
"Tell me, are you pregnant?"
She was stunned for a moment. "Yes... I am. How do you know?"
"I hear their heartbeat."
"Their? Twins?"
He nodded. "Do me a favour, don't tell your husband about it."
When she was about to protest, he added: "I will go with him on a mission. If it turns out that he simply needs rest and that his anger is only temporal, there is no danger anymore."
"Yes, I trust you, and thank you."
When Kenobi left the house, Anakin entered and faced a mixed up Padmé.
"Hi Angel, what is wrong? Why did Obi-Wan visit you?" He saw tears in her eyes.
"I- I..." she stammered.
"What did he do to you?"
"He thinks you might turn on the dark side of the force."
"Did he tell you that?"
She nodded. "He says your anger grows day by day and that he fears to lose you."
He softly took her into his arms and embraced her. Then he whispered: "As long as I have you, I won't be a Sith, you always turn out my good sides. I love you, my Angel."
They shared a passionate kiss.
Then he looked straight into her eyes. "There is something else on your mind. Want to share it?"
She smiled. "Everything is okay with me, Annie, thanks."
FLASHBACK END
Today she knew what he had been thinking. If a good friend of your wife leaves the house in a hurry when you enter, everybody would think the same...
Maybe, maybe this evening he will be in her arms again.
There was nothing in the world she would be looking forward to with bigger anticipation.
She consindered going to Obi-Wan and his friends.
Instead she decided to sleep.
As soon as she lay her body into the soft satin, needed peace came to her.
Her longing was so big, her yearning for Anakin.
They had been apart for so long... too long. She wanted to see him.
Before her thoughts could go deeper, needed sleep came to her.
Padmé fell into a deep, pleasant dream...
Her love was with her, his kisses trailed over her body.
Although being a Jedi, he knew how to satisfy her.
They were rolling on the ground, teasing each other with lusty remarks.
Her hands massaged his trained back, while his lips met hers for a passionate kiss.
His tongue glided into her mouth and she welcomed it with pleasure.
When his fingers touched her sensitive nipples, all she could do was moan.
She had forgotten about his metallic fingers... they felt human.
His warm arms then embraced her whole body, before he began to wander downwards and caressed the outside of her thighs.
This was a lovers' dance.
Although he was rough and harsh to the outside sometimes, he was even more tender when he was with his wife.
Somehow he could melt the ice she had built up during her political career. Melt it to the core of her heart.
And somehow she wasn't afraid that he would hurt her at her most vulnerable moments.
They trusted each other- until... No, even longer- forever.
Right now, she softly bit his nipple and his light cry drove Padmé crazy.
He lowered his body so her hot breasts touched his wet chest.
They responded to each other and that made it even harder to resist the urge, the need...
She felt how her breathing would get more hoarsy...
She heard how his breathing would become faster and faster...
Then they entwined their hands...
Sola entered the room of her sister. She had not answered the door, however, she knew she would be here.
She heard soft voices from the inside of her bedroom, and, as curious as Sola was, she opened the door and saw Padmé laying in her bed, mumbling something that sounded like "Anakin".
Something serious was going on in the real world and the results would be able to see in a few minutes, maybe hours; therefore, she didn't care about whatever pleasant dream her sister was having.
"Padmé...!" she called more than twice to wake her up.
She stretched her body before opening her eyes.
"Sis, wake up, you gonna miss everything!"
Suddenly Padmé realized there was an intruder. "Sola, what are you doing here?"
"I'm here to wake you up! A sleep won't keep you from the truth."
"The truth?"
"You are afraid you might have to face Anakin or Luke."
"I'm not."
"Of course you are. And I am here to help you."
She stayed quiet for a moment.
"You are afraid you might be alienated from him?"
"No... but... I think I'm simply afraid."
To break the silence, Sola asked: "Was a nice dream, right?"
"Yes... It's strange that I'm remembering this thing now."
"Why?"
"Well...it was our last night together. We were on Naboo. It had been a rainy day... We had been looking forward to a picknick, but the rain surprised us. So we ran back to our house. When we arrived there, we were soaking wet. Anakin arranged a fire in the fireside and rubbed me dry..."
Padmé tried to fight back tears and gulped. "W-we began to talk about having children of our own... I lay with my head on his chest and we imagined that we would have twins...A daughter with my eyes and Annie's smile..." She paused and a tear ran down her cheek. "And a son with Annie's eyes and my smile..." Her voice was a whisper. "We decided that we would call them Luke and Leia. We had been so happy back then..."
Sola was really speechless. Padmé just stared into her folded hands. Then she clenched her fists and got up.
She stared at her sister who now followed her example. They left the room together.
"Obi-Wan, what you do think will happen?"
"I have no idea, Master Yoda."
"I think that he will do the right thing." It was Qui-Gon Jinn. Next to him was Shmi Skywalker.
The atmosphere was filled with silence and fear.
Nobody would know if a Sith entered hell or not. So if Palpatine and Anakin were dead, nobody would know. A messenger would tell them after days.
Suddenly a figure appeared at the horizon.
You could really hear how everybody stopped breathing.
For the first moment, Obi-Wan thought it was Luke, but then...
Shmi had started running.
As had the person at the horizon.
All attendents saw how a happy mother embraced her dear son.
Then they came over to the others.
"Anakin..." Obi-Wan stammered. The old friends embraced.
"I knew you would bring balance to the force the moment I met you on Tatooine."
"Thank you, Master Qui-Gon. The emperor is dead."
Applause could be heard.
Padmé ran up the stairs. She heard voices... Sola was right behind her.
When she arrived, she was completely out of breath, but there was a voice... a feeling... a presence... which made her run.
She stopped abruptly and stared up the hill where many people had gathered.
It was true... yes, it was her Anakin... he was standing up there, shaking hands with some Jedi.
Suddenly he turned around as if turned around by an unvisible force.
She stood there as if she was frozen, her breathing stopped for a moment, the whole world seemed as if it didn't exsist.
His blue eyes bored into her hazel ones, they held the gaze for minutes.
Then both began moving.
First very slow, but then faster in each other's direction.
Padmé stopped only a feet away from Anakin.
It was him- aged to at least 50 years- but she'd never forget his smile, his eyes, his full lips...
He stared down at her, taking in every feature of her tender face he had secretly missed.
Both were too loaded with emotions to speak.
Cautiously he got closer to her, so that he could touch her bare arm.
She remembered that gesture from the moment before their first kiss- it was even more intimate now.
To take in the moment she closed her eyes.
He was stunned by her reaction- he had been expecting anger, fear, hatred, but everything she showed him was her love for him.
His eyes began to fill with tears.
She had always believed in him.
He loved her from the depth of his heart.
Streams of tears ran down his cheeks.
Then he fell down to his knees.
Padmé reopened her eyes.
Touched by his gesture, she also sank down on her knees.
Their eyes met, then he lowered his ones again, staring at the ground.
He swallowed. His voice was a mere whisper. "I-I don't deserve you. I destroyed your life- a-and you are still here... waiting for me."
"Anakin, what are you talking about?" She asked gently while running a finger over his wet cheek.
"I destroyed the emperor. He wanted to kill Luke as he wanted to kill you. This time I was strong enough. I could not let him destroy Luke's life as he has destroyed yours." He looked up, directly in her eyes, which had begun to fill with tears. "Angel, I love you."
She was deeply shaken by his words, her lips had began to tremble, under tears everything she could admit to him was: "Annie, I truly, deeply love you."
They smiled at each other.
Only applause could be heard when they fell into a deep embrace and kissed passionately.
On Endor the celebration about their won fight against the Empire continued.
The rebels and ewoks were dancing, brother and sister embraced as if they had not seen each other for decades.
Then Luke Skywalker regarded the nearer wood and saw four ghosts standing and watching the joy which could be seen in every face.
He recognized his teachers, Obi-Wan Kenobi and Yoda, then his father Anakin Skywalker- and next to his father- his mother.
To the plot: The story takes place during and after Return of the Jedi.
There might be spoilers for Episode 3 since I refer to an old script where Padmé was called Arcadia and to a new still not official script. You are warned!
Any comments or critizism may be mailed to DarthVader_1401@hotmail.com
Enjoy!
**********************
Another fate...
Padmé sat in her chamber. She was alone, only her thoughts were with her.
Thoughts of grief, sorrow, but a last glimpse of hope.
In all those years she had been here now, she had not given up hope.
They had taught her not to...
When she came to this place, her only wish was to die.
But in eternity you can't die. You die once. In your life.
More than twenty years had passed since her death.
Although she could have been happy here with nearly all of her friends surrounding her, she wasn't.
Everybody knew why.
Padmé did not know what had happened to her love, Anakin.
If he was dead, who would know if he did enter eternity or suffer in hell forever?
She washed the last thought away, she couldn't stand it.
Somebody told her after him turning into a Sith she had the right to slap him.
Her shock was too big to react. However, she should have punched that person instead.
A piece of her heart was missing, but he would keep it safe, and bring it back to her, if only he could.
Memories of her death filled once again her mind.
Everything she longed for then was redemption.
However, she didn't want to leave her daughter without any knowledge or love of her real mother. Leia, their daughter, a sign of their love.
A thousand times she had questioned herself if it was right to separate her from her twin brother Luke.
But another decision bothered her even more, did she really maintain the right to hide them from their father?
Especially after the happenings of her death she asked herself these questions.
FLASHBACK
It had been three years.
Three years since she hadn't seen her husband, her real husband.
She was living on Alderaan as the wife of Bail Organa.
Padmé had tried to move on with her life, but in the eyes of her daughter Leia she saw her past.
Her past with a man she once deeply loved. And still did.
He was dead.
But in some way he wasn't.
He lived.
He still lived under the armor of Darth Vader.
Obi-Wan had asked her not to think that her husband still existed.
Only a handfull of people knew who Vader really was. Padmé had felt it, felt that her husband lived under the mask of the deadly Darth Vader.
Anakin Skywalker was a Sith Lord now, the dark side flooded him, gave him power, strength, might.
Padmé blamed herself that she had not seen his change.
But who would choose a marriage with a former queen over the reign of the galaxy?
Everything she felt was that she wanted him back, her Anakin.
Although she knew better.
If you are once being seduced by the dark side and your only feeling is hate, how can you be converted then?
The questions hurt Padmé since she didn't know an answer.
She didn't know how he could turn his back to her and leave and never come back and never come looking for her.
Tears welled up in her eyes.
A rational voice told her not to mix up the facts.
Anakin left with Obi-Wan to go on a crusade. He had promised to come back, as he had always.
However, she should have seen the signs.
Master Kenobi had asked her not to reveal her pregnancy to her husband because he wasn't sure if he was still a Jedi or already a Sith.
She questioned herself if it was right to go that far, but she believed Anakin's master since he spent more time with him.
When Obi-Wan returned, she felt death and misery entering her house over the door-step.
A single look in his face had told her.
Her first reaction was pure shock, the other was hitting Kenobi with her hand.
Then she fell to her knees and began to sob and burst into tears.
She wanted to follow Anakin as she had promised.
Today she knew that he had somehow survived the fall into the lava pit and since then he had been the emperor's most deadly tool.
It was also his fault. He had seduced Anakin. Yoda once told her before he was left behind on Dagobah that they had all underestimated the influence of Palpatine.
Padmé made up her mind that Anakin had to wear a mask and a shiny armor to keep his body functioning.
He was imprisoned.
Even if he chose to be a Jedi again, he couldn't.
The Jedi said that if you are once consumed with hate, you couldn't be turned.
But if love can become hate, why couldn't hate become love then?
It were her Anakin's lungs that Vader breathed through.
It were her Anakin's eyes that Vader looked through.
It was her Anakin's heart that pounded in Vader's chest.
And yet, Vader was not her Anakin.
Her handmaidens had told her that she was so thin.
Yes, she was. Her hands were bony, her skin light, showing the veins.
She didn't possess the power to kill herself fast.
Leia should feel that she had a mother who cared about her.
Life on Alderaan was peaceful, the garden reminded her on Naboo.
She would have loved to stay there, but Obi-Wan was right in saying that it would be too dangerous.
The emperor might come looking for her, but as it seemed he didn't see her as a threat.
To shield herself from the outer world she also had to drop her occupation as a senator.
Right now she was outside the palace and devoured the afternoon sun and smelled the sweet scent of blossomed flowers. Nearby she heard Leia giggle.
Why didn't Vader himself come looking for her she kept asking herself again and again.
He had been here. But only for diplomatic purposes. Not because of her.
Temptation overcame her to look for him while he stayed, but she could withstand knowing of the danger she would put Leia in. And Bail of course.
Who knows what that damn Palpatine might have told her husband.
Suddenly the sun went dark.
Padmé opened her eyes in shock to see a large group of ships approaching.
In reflex she hurried over to Leia, grabbed her by the waist and ran into the palace.
Only seconds later Alderaan was under attack- by the Imperial Forces.
Bail was relieved to see his wife and daughter enter unharmed.
"What is going on? Why are they firing at us?" She shouted.
"I have no idea. Go into the shelter."
"No. I want to know who leads the attack." Bail knew her all too well. In the past three years her eyes hadn't changed- they still had Anakin in them.
The same moment Stormtroopers conquered the building and opened fire.
Padmé shielded her daughter, carried her then in the direction of the shelter.
Bail guaranteed her save passage.
On her way she stopped to grab a weapon.
"Mommy, what is happening here?"
"Don't be afraid, honey, there's nothing going to happen to you."
An attacker shot at them, hitting her hard on the shoulder.
She had to struggle not to let her daughter fall down. "MOMMY!"
Sounds of fire and her pleading child echoed in her ears.
With a last strain of strength she collected herself and armed her gun at the trooper who was coming towards her. A single shot and he stumbled and fell.
They approached it.
Her handmaidens saw her exhaustion and came hurrying taking Leia.
Suddenly Bail entered in a hurry, having paniced eyes.
"He is here. Vader is here."
Bail knew who he really was. Padmé had told him after some time. Everybody else believed Anakin was dead.
Her breathing stopped for a moment. "He has come for me."
He knew what she was up to. "Don't go. You don't have to face him. He isn't allowed to do this attack, diplomatic protocols protect us. The empire has to pay for this."
But he felt that his words had no effect on her, she had already made her decision.
"He would return. I don't want to be a constant threat to your planet and I don't want to play hide and seek with him. I'm sorry Bail."
She bent down and kissed Leia on the forehead. Under upwelling tears she whispered to her daughter: "Never forget me, honey. And become a strong girl. I love you."
She embraced her with the last strength left. "Mum, where are you going? Will you come back?"
"I'll always be with you." She tipped softly with her finger on Leia's chest where her heart beat.
"Vader is coming into this direction."
Little Leia was too young to understand all the conflicts and connections, but one name stayed in her memory: Vader.
Her mother embraced her a last time before leaving her daughter, handmaidens and husband behind. She knew she was weak. At least to the outside. Her body felt limp as she wandered through the corridors of the palace. It was like a final walk.
She sensed coldness, deadly coldness coming crawling around the corner.
It hit her with a power she hadn't expected, but there was still something familiar about it; therefore, she felt no fear. To a stranger this aura must have seamed like death.
Then she saw him.
He stood there, taller than she had remembered him, his dark mask reflecting the last sun-beams, which made him look like a precious knight in a shiny armor. Indeed, he was a Lord.
She stepped before him, closing the distance up to a few inches.
Her face turned towards his masked one, now able to see it at close range.
It was like a skull, designed to scare the people.
But not her. He might look like the reaper and spread the same aura, but some part in her kept telling her that there was still her Anakin inside this Cyborg.
Their silence was pierced by his mechanical breathing. She tried to see if he reacted to her at all.
If only she could see his eyes, they would tell her about the struggle in him, because he wasn't speaking, too.
"It's good you hand yourself out." His voice was so deep, and it sounded mechanical, too.
"You have no right to be here and you know!" She blurted out.
"Do you have a right to be here?" He shot back.
"Where else should I be?" It was a silent reproach.
"Where do you want to be?" Did he read her mind?
"Can you answer my questions with answers instead of other questions?" Yes, she was a politician, her tongue was more trained than his.
"Don't you think it's a shame we meet under these circumstances?"
The first time during their talk she looked to the ground. He still saw them as a 'we'.
She regained her posture and also her tone she used to have as a queen. "I'm sorry to disappoint you, but you aren't the man I remember marrying." Padmé should have known better than teasing a Sith Lord. Even if he was her own husband. However, she didn't want to show to him that she still considered him as Anakin, the man she was married to and loved from the depth of her heart.
Too late she realized how offensive the last sentence was.
When he spoke, his voice was even colder than before. "Then you won't be treated with the respect my wife would have been treated with."
With those final words he grabbed her by the arm and pulled her with him. He had seen how weak she was. Seen her emaciated cheeks where her round and healthy face had been, seen the pale and light skin, where she had been dark tanned. And he had seen the injury coming from a laser weapon, though he had ordered to use narcotization only.
Anakin questioned himself what he had done to her, but soon Vader told him that it was her own fault. She had believed in that fool Obi-Wan.
Padmé followed him as fast as she could, the grip on her arm hurt but she kept silent. Somehow she felt dizzy.
Vader stopped. He eyed her which she ,of course, could not see. Her face looked even paler than before. "You are wrong."
"About what?" With difficulty she kept herself from collapsing.
"He is still alive. Or don't you remember what he once promised you? He'll never be a Sith as long as you are with him."
"But you belong to the dark side!"
"Indeed, I do. Because I thought you were dead."
This revelation shocked her. She was too stunned to speak.
"The emperor told me you are dead, betrayed and killed by the Jedi. I believed him until I felt your presense on Alderaan."
"W-why should the Jedi kill me?"
"Because they saw you as the reason for me turning into a Sith."
It made sense to her. It did- but that meant, that he had killed the remaining Jedi only to revenge her death, as he had killed the Tuskens when he had found out that they were responsible for his mother's death.
The world spun around. She couldn't keep her balance anymore. She fainted from exhaustion, everything turned black.
Bail had watched the scene from secure distance and now he saw how his wife was falling- falling to the ground. Right to the foot of the dark lord, her real husband.
But then something unexpectedely happened: He hurried to catch her before her soft body touched the hard stone.
He carried her away, to his shuttle.
At this moment Bail knew that he would never see the love of his life again. She was finally where she belonged- at the side of her real husband.
However, the question what he would do to her bothered him. If he did not kill her, then the emperor would.
Padmé was disorientated. Strange things surrounded her, she saw a bright light at the end of the dark tunnel. She screamed for help, screamed for Anakin.
Then suddenly the light was gone and pure darkness was with her. Had he abandoned her?
Suddenly she felt the touch of a soothing hand, the one she had missed for three years.
She calmed down.
Slowly she opened her eyes to see she was on a starship, an Imperial starship.
Next to her bed sat the Dark Lord... Anakin... he must have touched her through the force to wake her up. But the touch had been intimate, not altered through the dark side, which meant that his heart still possessed love and was not completely consumed with hate.
She tried to rise, but that attempt was unsuccessfull because of her weakness.
"You need rest to regain your health."
"Health for what?"
He was a little shocked by her expression. "Health to live."
"I have given up my life three years ago."
He paused for a moment before he spoke. "I had done so, too, but the dark side told me to fight. To fight the betrayers."
"What has the emperor done to you?"
"He saved me."
"No. He is the real liar. He betrayed you by telling you about my death. He achieved his goal."
"The Jedi are the betrayers, they didn't bother about slavery on Tatooine and didn't care about taking a little boy away from his mother. They are selfish."
"Anakin, you know what you're saying is not true!"
"Never call me Anakin again."
"It is your real name. If you didn't remember than I wouldn't be alive anymore."
"You know me too well. No wonder my master wants you dead."
She thought. "And who is going to execute me?"
"I am only a messenger. He is aware of the fact that I am unable to harm you."
"Why did you come to Alderaan?" The question was nearly a whisper.
"Having felt your presence on the planet left me restless. Although I'm a Sith I can't control my thoughts when I'm near you."
The image of their first kiss flashed through her mind. Why did this have to hurt so much? A knot in her throat kept her from speaking. The man right in front of her didn't just seem to be Anakin, it was her Anakin. She had to fight back upwelling tears, not wanting to show any sign of regret in her eyes.
The only thing she managed to say, was: "You can't deny you're still Anakin. I know you are."
His voice seemed to crack up, too. "And I know you still consider me as your husband."
They stared at each other for a long time. They were so close but yet so far apart.
She spoke in a desperate, low voice. "Why? Did you ever ask yourself why we have to endure this? And how long it will be going on?"
"It is my destiny. But there is still light at the end of the tunnel."
She managed to sit up. "Your destiny?! I tell you what. I am part of your destiny! Have you ever thought about the consequences of your acting?"
"I knew you were a queen once. A queen who lived in wealth. After our marriage we were poor, you couldn't wear those fine garments any more. I came to the conclusion that as long as I stayed a Jedi, we would live in poverty; therefore, I made my decision."
"It didn't bother that I couldn't wear expensive dresses and had to live the life of a simple woman. Everything that was important to me was you!"
"I wanted to make you happy. Now let me tell you something: I could survive without this helmet, I could survive without this armor if only my heart was totally consumed with hate. But there is still a place in my heart that will never be evil. You. You stand to yourself, have ever and will ever. Maybe that will save me someday."
She nodded in agreement. After a long pause, she asked: "When are we going to arrive?"
"In the morning. Around 10 hours."
"My death is sealed?" Having met him again made it even harder to leave soon.
"He will ask you if you desire to serve for the empire."
She gave him a sad look since they both knew she would never betray herself. "You know that I won't..."
"Yes. And it upsets me and bothers me. When you are gone there is nothing left of me, of my former self. That idealistic fool Obi-Wan is hiding somewhere, but I hate him. If I ever see him again, he will be dead! But you... you are my last reminder on Anakin Skywalker. When you are gone, then he will be gone, too."
If only you knew... she whispered to herself. Leia, she has your features... and Luke, he already had your eyes and smile when he was born. "Then fight it! Fight the emperor! You are the only one who can kill him. And he knows it! He knows that you're the chosen one, chosen to restore the peace in the galaxy."
"Without him, I wouldn't be alive anymore."
"Without him we would still be living on Naboo." The thought hurt her.
"I can't betray my master."
She put all her eggs in one basket. "So he's more important to you than I am?"
"No, but he's my master. He showed me power, might."
"Are these your only concerns? You simply wish to rule the galaxy?"
"Stop questioning my motives!" He had gotten up from his seat and the light reflected in his dark eyes. For a brief moment she was afraid.
"Have you ever been a slave? Have you ever lost your mother twice in your life? Have you ever lost your whole identity? And have you ever lost your wife because of the persons you trusted?"
"Anakin..." she stammered.
"I know the last part is not true, but it will be true. I was so naïve to think the emperor was honest, now he's going to kill you because he sees you as a threat to my loyality. And he is correct. With you persuading my mind I'm willing to slaughter him only to save you. But I'm not strong enough, not yet." He had turned his back to her and now watched the stars. The black cape made him seem even taller then he originally was. Everybody feared him.
She searched for words. "W-what kind of occupation would the emperor give me?"
He seemed surprised and turned his head to look at her. His breathing cut the silence between them. "You would only stay for me. I don't want that. Acting against your will, you would be more upset day by day."
"True." She blurted out. "Since the day you left I had to act against my heart and died piece by piece."
He walked over to her bed, puzzled by her words not knowing their meaning.
"You hide yourself behind this... this mask, this identity. I want to rip it off and get to see your face! Your eyes! Your emotions! I want my Anakin back!" She burst into tears but buried her face in her tiny hands.
He had never seen her this desperate. She was a diplomat. They were taught not to show their emotions, but this break-down made him see what he had really done to her.
Suddenly she felt a touch on her shoulder and slowly looked up to see Vader's mask only inches away.
In his dark, throaty voice he whispered: "Do you have the slightest idea how much I hated this armour the first time after my recovery? I need to be fast to be a good Sith, but this thing imprisons me, I had to start at zero. And the mask- the mask is meant to hide who I really am. And it's meant to scare- scare everybody away so nobody gets to know my dark secret. The secret of Anakin Skywalker."
Although she couldn't see his eyes, she felt them burning into her. The same intense gaze he used to give her. Slowly she passed her hand over the dark shiny outside of his mask.
"Please", she whispered, "don't scare me away, for I still want to be near you." She stopped. "I love you." With that she lay her arms around him into a deep embrace.
He returned the gesture.
Hours later they walked over the ship. They walked side by side like equals, not like watcher and prisoner. Padmé had wanted to see his world.
To the crew it must have seemed odd- the dark lord and next to him a woman. A woman more than a head smaller than him, tiny and fragile. Yet, he treated her like a treasure.
And she didn't seem to be afraid. Everybody on the entire ship feared Vader. Not only because of his appearance but also because he treated those who disappointed him very ungentle.
A smile played on her face as she saw the people eyeing them.
Vader on the other hand was surprised by his wife's good mood. He had missed her all this time. Her smile, her melodic voice, her dark eyes, her touch, her presence. Now she was there, but not for long. He could guess what the emperor had in mind.
"What are they thinking?"
Her looked down at her only to see her smile. "They are curious. Curious what a woman like you is doing at my side. They want to know why I treat you so well."
"Somebody got the idea?"
"Not yet." He turned his head to one man who was sitting near helm control. "That one, I should keep an eye on him."
"Why?"
"He thinks I am a monster."
Padmé gave him a shocked expression, but he soothed her.
"That's the common believe." He stopped. "Yes, some fools came up with the idea that you might be something special to me."
He called them fools. At least they shared the same opinion in this matter. "Do you think they might use me as a threat against you?"
"Try it and meet death. Nobody will harm you, Padmé."
"What will the emperor do to me?"
He lowered his head and seemed to think. "I'm not sure. I'm sorry that I'll not be able to save you."
"I understand that you can't betray your master. If you do so, he won't trust you and you will never be able to defeat him."
Her own well-being never really mattered to her as long as the people were satisfied. Sometimes he had hated this character trait. Right now, he damned it.
On the contrary she showed with the gesture that she trusted him and believed in his abilities.
They entered a lift which brought them into the emperor's chamber. He sat in his 'throne' and eyed them suspiciously.
"I had no doubt you would bring her to me."
"Yes, master."
They walked up the stairs and stopped in front of him.
"Padmé Naberrie. I always thought you were a good senator. What has happened to you in the last three years?"
She questioned herself how she could have voted for him to be chancelor. "I was occupied with my own interests."
He grinned evilly. "What a pity we had to lose you."
"I couldn't have stopped the ongoing ruin of the republic."
"Yes. You couldn't have. You didn't possess the might. Maybe I can give you might."
She waited for him to speak further.
"The empire needs good politicians."
"I'm sorry emperor Palpatine, but I will never serve for the empire."
He rested for a few minutes. "Think what that would mean... Always being close to your dear husband..."
"Why do you try to get me with that? You lied to Anakin that I was dead. And right now you want me to stay?"
He laughed. "You have not lost your abilities. But think of it: You could rule the galaxy together, lord and lady Vader."
"Pardon me if I have to disappoint you, but I will not work for something I have tried to destroy."
He studied her face. "I feel that you still have passionate emotions for your husband. But if you refuse to support us, then your destiny is sealed." He got up from his throne but Padmé didn't back away.
"You will never fully convert him to the dark side, never. Love is stronger than hatred."
He appeared to be touched. "Really?! I never thought of you being so naïve, dear Amidala."
She fell to her knees when the first rays of the Sith Lightening hit her body.
Vader tried to remain calm, but the sign of his wife in pain and struggling with death made him mad. He wanted to save her, but he had to be loyal to his master...
Padmé had closed her eyes but screamed because of the agony. She felt as if she was burning... her whole body was eaten away by the flames.
Suddenly it stopped. She opened her eyes to see Vader standing before her. But his technical body system couldn't handle the shock of the lightening, so he fell to the ground, his breathing sounded strange, as if damaged. She tried to crawl to his side, but collapsed before everything turned black. The laughing of the emperor echoed in her ears.
She heard voices. Voices she had never heard before.
Reality had to sink in before she opend her eyes.
She was weak and memory didn't come to her fast.
The light from a sun caused pain. She was on a planet.
Slowly she recoginzed the shape of the outer world. This must be some kind of lab.
An attempt to rise was diminished by sudden pain hitting her body.
Somebody she didn't know approached. It was a doctor.
"Please lay still. You are weak."
She nodded. "Where am I?"
"On Coruscant. Don't ask further."
"A last question: Where is Ana-..." she corrected herself. "Lord Vader?"
He didn't answer and she feared the worst.
Suddenly she heard a voice she hadn't heard for three years and it made her heart jump.
The doctor backed away and she could see a man entering.
She didn't recognize him from the start, because his skin was pale, nearly white and he lacked hair.
"Anakin..." she whispered. He stopped before her bed and asked the doctor something which she couldn't hear.
Then he seated himself next to her bed and took her hand.
"Anakin, why did you try to save me?"
"Padmé, I had at least to try to save you."
"Where is your helmet?"
"My Body System collapsed and the doctors and Coruscant had to repair it. I told them to leave me without mask so you could see my eyes."
She smiled at the gesture. "I will die?"
He lowered his head. "I'm afraid so."
She studied his face. As he realized it, he looked away. "Don't... you are no monster, Annie. You are still my love."
She felt it. Death crawled into her, her body got limp, her weakness increased. He must have also felt it.
"Angel, please, don't leave me!" He took her face into his hands and forced her to see in his eyes.
Padmé was touched, his eyes were shiny, wet, he was desperate.
Her hand came up to his face and carress his chin. She signaled him to get closer. "I will wait for you."
"I love you..." he whispered before their lips met for the last kiss in their life.
Everything around her went white, flooded with light when she left her body to live forever.
FLASHBACK END
Somebody knocked on her door.
"Come in." She got up.
"Hello Padmé."
"Master Kenobi, how nice to see you." He was older now, around 60, not the fiery young Yedi she had remembered him from her life.
"I wanted to check on you, how are you doing?"
"I'm fine. Your face tells me that something has happened."
"Although you aren't a Yedi you can read my mind." They sat on a near-by sofa.
"Please, it has something to do with Anakin, hasn't it?"
"Yes. I just spoke with Luke. They know they're father and son. Your son is angry that I didn't tell him the truth."
"It was unevitable." Padmé smiled. "What about Leia?"
"Only Luke knows of her true identity, but I think that Anakin senses something, too."
"And Leia herself? I'm so jealous that you can see them and I can't..."
"She looks like you. The same brown eyes, the same temper... And it seems that she also has found love in a young rebel called Han Solo."
"What type of man is he?"
"Oh, he can be handsome. They are both stubborn." Suddenly he paused. "Somehow I see you and Anakin in them. She is a princess, he is a gifted young man with nothing in his pockets but himself. I'm sorry to remind you on your happy times."
"They will return, and don't excuse yourself. There isn't a second I don't think about Ani."
"So am I. Those what-if questions bother me, what if I could have prevented it? Then you would be a happy family by now."
"Don't blame yourself. Somehow I sense that the Skywalker family is predestinated to suffer..."
"Maybe not any longer. If Luke succeeds, you will be at rest."
"You forget about the emperor. He holds all strings in his deadly hands."
"Yes. I'm too full of fear to look into the future..."
"But you believe in Luke, don't you?"
"Yes. He is the son of the Skywalker and Anakin was strong when he was a Jedi."
"As a Sith he was even more powerful. He killed the Jedi." *Because of me...*
"Yes, it was the emperor's goal to eleminate them. But your husband wasn't this dumb. Without a reason he wouldn't have..."
"It was because of me..." she interrupted him. "He wanted revenge on my death."
"But you died through the Imperial Forces and because of your weakness."
"I know. Palpatine had lied to Anakin. He told him that the Jedi betrayed me and killed me."
Obi-Wan looked concerned. "And he trusted in this story?"
"Whom would you trust if you have just been saved by the emperor..."
"And nearly been killed during a lightsaber duel with an old friend. Yes, it makes sense." He inhaled deeply.
"I'm sorry I didn't tell you that."
"No. The past still hurts. Both of us."
There was a long silence, before she spoke."Something else bothers you, do you want to share it with me?"
"When Luke left, his destination was his father. He desires to turn him back on the good side of the Force."
The former senator reacted in shock. Anakin could not be turned to the good side anymore, she knew that. He was emprisoned in the armour of Vader, the only way to convert him, was to kill him.
"No, Obi-Wan, this can't be true. Luke can't kill his own father!"
"He is not going to murder him, he wants to save him."
"Do you think, that Ani will...?"
"No, but I fear that the emperor might kill Luke if he won't convert to the dark side."
"And the only thing we can do is wait..."
"Yes. I'm sorry not to bring you better news."
"If Luke turns to the dark side, Anakin would be no use to the emperor anymore."
He nodded. "And I presume that your husband knows so, too."
Padmé stared at the window. "He was the chosen one..."
"No, he still is the chosen one, who will restore the peace in the galaxy."
"Let's hope this prophecy comes true."
Obi-Wan got up from his place and headed for the door. "The other Jedi and me, we will wait together. Shmi is also with us and you may join us, too."
"Yes, thanks." He left the room.
"Ani, I believe in you. You aren't just the emperor's tool." she whispered.
FLASHBACK
Two years had passed since their marriage.
They were a happy couple, both busy with their jobs, but never forgetting about the dearest one.
Then, one day, Padmé came back from a doctor having the best news in the world.
To her astonishment it wasn't Anakin who waited in their home for her, but Obi-Wan, his master.
"Hello, Kenobi, what brings you to us? My husband is not at home apparently."
"Yes, I know and I want to talk to you in private."
"What's wrong?"
"Me and the Jedi council are very concerned about my padawan. We fear he might take the fast path."
"And become a Sith? No, you misjudge him."
"Did he behave strange in the past?"
"He was a little bit more aggressive, but not towards me."
"I am afraid of your well-being."
She realized how concerned he was. "Obi-Wan, Anakin will never turn against me, never!"
"What makes you so sure?"
"Because we love each other, there's a bond between us that not even the Jedi nor the Sith can break."
"Please, I'm just trying to help. We have seen this change in other Jedi."
"But Ani isn't a simple Jedi. You know and I know. He might dress as one, but he doesn't behave as one."
"Yes. But I sense his anger, which grows day by day. I'm simply afraid of you. When you were 14 years old I promised to protect you, now, you are 26 and I still follow that promise."
"I-I'm sorry, Obi-Wan. I'm just a little tensed myself."
"Tell me, are you pregnant?"
She was stunned for a moment. "Yes... I am. How do you know?"
"I hear their heartbeat."
"Their? Twins?"
He nodded. "Do me a favour, don't tell your husband about it."
When she was about to protest, he added: "I will go with him on a mission. If it turns out that he simply needs rest and that his anger is only temporal, there is no danger anymore."
"Yes, I trust you, and thank you."
When Kenobi left the house, Anakin entered and faced a mixed up Padmé.
"Hi Angel, what is wrong? Why did Obi-Wan visit you?" He saw tears in her eyes.
"I- I..." she stammered.
"What did he do to you?"
"He thinks you might turn on the dark side of the force."
"Did he tell you that?"
She nodded. "He says your anger grows day by day and that he fears to lose you."
He softly took her into his arms and embraced her. Then he whispered: "As long as I have you, I won't be a Sith, you always turn out my good sides. I love you, my Angel."
They shared a passionate kiss.
Then he looked straight into her eyes. "There is something else on your mind. Want to share it?"
She smiled. "Everything is okay with me, Annie, thanks."
FLASHBACK END
Today she knew what he had been thinking. If a good friend of your wife leaves the house in a hurry when you enter, everybody would think the same...
Maybe, maybe this evening he will be in her arms again.
There was nothing in the world she would be looking forward to with bigger anticipation.
She consindered going to Obi-Wan and his friends.
Instead she decided to sleep.
As soon as she lay her body into the soft satin, needed peace came to her.
Her longing was so big, her yearning for Anakin.
They had been apart for so long... too long. She wanted to see him.
Before her thoughts could go deeper, needed sleep came to her.
Padmé fell into a deep, pleasant dream...
Her love was with her, his kisses trailed over her body.
Although being a Jedi, he knew how to satisfy her.
They were rolling on the ground, teasing each other with lusty remarks.
Her hands massaged his trained back, while his lips met hers for a passionate kiss.
His tongue glided into her mouth and she welcomed it with pleasure.
When his fingers touched her sensitive nipples, all she could do was moan.
She had forgotten about his metallic fingers... they felt human.
His warm arms then embraced her whole body, before he began to wander downwards and caressed the outside of her thighs.
This was a lovers' dance.
Although he was rough and harsh to the outside sometimes, he was even more tender when he was with his wife.
Somehow he could melt the ice she had built up during her political career. Melt it to the core of her heart.
And somehow she wasn't afraid that he would hurt her at her most vulnerable moments.
They trusted each other- until... No, even longer- forever.
Right now, she softly bit his nipple and his light cry drove Padmé crazy.
He lowered his body so her hot breasts touched his wet chest.
They responded to each other and that made it even harder to resist the urge, the need...
She felt how her breathing would get more hoarsy...
She heard how his breathing would become faster and faster...
Then they entwined their hands...
Sola entered the room of her sister. She had not answered the door, however, she knew she would be here.
She heard soft voices from the inside of her bedroom, and, as curious as Sola was, she opened the door and saw Padmé laying in her bed, mumbling something that sounded like "Anakin".
Something serious was going on in the real world and the results would be able to see in a few minutes, maybe hours; therefore, she didn't care about whatever pleasant dream her sister was having.
"Padmé...!" she called more than twice to wake her up.
She stretched her body before opening her eyes.
"Sis, wake up, you gonna miss everything!"
Suddenly Padmé realized there was an intruder. "Sola, what are you doing here?"
"I'm here to wake you up! A sleep won't keep you from the truth."
"The truth?"
"You are afraid you might have to face Anakin or Luke."
"I'm not."
"Of course you are. And I am here to help you."
She stayed quiet for a moment.
"You are afraid you might be alienated from him?"
"No... but... I think I'm simply afraid."
To break the silence, Sola asked: "Was a nice dream, right?"
"Yes... It's strange that I'm remembering this thing now."
"Why?"
"Well...it was our last night together. We were on Naboo. It had been a rainy day... We had been looking forward to a picknick, but the rain surprised us. So we ran back to our house. When we arrived there, we were soaking wet. Anakin arranged a fire in the fireside and rubbed me dry..."
Padmé tried to fight back tears and gulped. "W-we began to talk about having children of our own... I lay with my head on his chest and we imagined that we would have twins...A daughter with my eyes and Annie's smile..." She paused and a tear ran down her cheek. "And a son with Annie's eyes and my smile..." Her voice was a whisper. "We decided that we would call them Luke and Leia. We had been so happy back then..."
Sola was really speechless. Padmé just stared into her folded hands. Then she clenched her fists and got up.
She stared at her sister who now followed her example. They left the room together.
"Obi-Wan, what you do think will happen?"
"I have no idea, Master Yoda."
"I think that he will do the right thing." It was Qui-Gon Jinn. Next to him was Shmi Skywalker.
The atmosphere was filled with silence and fear.
Nobody would know if a Sith entered hell or not. So if Palpatine and Anakin were dead, nobody would know. A messenger would tell them after days.
Suddenly a figure appeared at the horizon.
You could really hear how everybody stopped breathing.
For the first moment, Obi-Wan thought it was Luke, but then...
Shmi had started running.
As had the person at the horizon.
All attendents saw how a happy mother embraced her dear son.
Then they came over to the others.
"Anakin..." Obi-Wan stammered. The old friends embraced.
"I knew you would bring balance to the force the moment I met you on Tatooine."
"Thank you, Master Qui-Gon. The emperor is dead."
Applause could be heard.
Padmé ran up the stairs. She heard voices... Sola was right behind her.
When she arrived, she was completely out of breath, but there was a voice... a feeling... a presence... which made her run.
She stopped abruptly and stared up the hill where many people had gathered.
It was true... yes, it was her Anakin... he was standing up there, shaking hands with some Jedi.
Suddenly he turned around as if turned around by an unvisible force.
She stood there as if she was frozen, her breathing stopped for a moment, the whole world seemed as if it didn't exsist.
His blue eyes bored into her hazel ones, they held the gaze for minutes.
Then both began moving.
First very slow, but then faster in each other's direction.
Padmé stopped only a feet away from Anakin.
It was him- aged to at least 50 years- but she'd never forget his smile, his eyes, his full lips...
He stared down at her, taking in every feature of her tender face he had secretly missed.
Both were too loaded with emotions to speak.
Cautiously he got closer to her, so that he could touch her bare arm.
She remembered that gesture from the moment before their first kiss- it was even more intimate now.
To take in the moment she closed her eyes.
He was stunned by her reaction- he had been expecting anger, fear, hatred, but everything she showed him was her love for him.
His eyes began to fill with tears.
She had always believed in him.
He loved her from the depth of his heart.
Streams of tears ran down his cheeks.
Then he fell down to his knees.
Padmé reopened her eyes.
Touched by his gesture, she also sank down on her knees.
Their eyes met, then he lowered his ones again, staring at the ground.
He swallowed. His voice was a mere whisper. "I-I don't deserve you. I destroyed your life- a-and you are still here... waiting for me."
"Anakin, what are you talking about?" She asked gently while running a finger over his wet cheek.
"I destroyed the emperor. He wanted to kill Luke as he wanted to kill you. This time I was strong enough. I could not let him destroy Luke's life as he has destroyed yours." He looked up, directly in her eyes, which had begun to fill with tears. "Angel, I love you."
She was deeply shaken by his words, her lips had began to tremble, under tears everything she could admit to him was: "Annie, I truly, deeply love you."
They smiled at each other.
Only applause could be heard when they fell into a deep embrace and kissed passionately.
On Endor the celebration about their won fight against the Empire continued.
The rebels and ewoks were dancing, brother and sister embraced as if they had not seen each other for decades.
Then Luke Skywalker regarded the nearer wood and saw four ghosts standing and watching the joy which could be seen in every face.
He recognized his teachers, Obi-Wan Kenobi and Yoda, then his father Anakin Skywalker- and next to his father- his mother.
