Chapter 2

Intro:

It occurs to me that in my initial offering I wiped out a somewhat important piece of info. I have altered the character names to reflect a more 'Southern' naming convention. There's lots of debate going on amongst those I have asked to proofread, and I've certain received a number of very good suggestions. For what it's worth, I'm attempting to keep the 'southern' names as close to the original character name as I can. Some I wanted to change just for the heck of it. I thought 'Aunt Daisy' would invoke a little more rural feel than keeping the name Petunia, but it still needed to be a flower (Petunia, Lilly, Daisy.you get the idea.) For example, one of my biggest dilemmas was Dudley. Dudley could be a southern name, but if there is a character in this story that deserves the name Bubba, it's him. And I mean name, not a nickname! I have met a few so I do know they exist!! But I felt I should go ahead and modify it at least a little bit in the spirit of things, and that's how I came up with Dirk. I knew a Dirk once and I suspect their formative years are fairly parallel to one another.

Also on a personal note, the 'beans in their chili for heaven's sake' in chapter one.that's a personal pet peeve. Here in Texas, we have chili contests all over the southern portion of the state, and it's a big deal. Chili is like barbeque.you get different types from different areas of the country, but there's one hard and fast rule I (and I think most true Texans) stick to: Beans do NOT go in chili! From Louisiana we have the wonderful dish of 'red beans and rice.' That's a SIDE dish that goes great with chili! Beans should NOT be in the chili itself. Bad bad bad! That's like putting potato in burritos, it's just a cheap way to fill you up! EVIL!

And now, on with our story:



If a ride home from anywhere could be memorable, for either good or bad reasons, this one was. They got to the truck and Uncle Vern banished Harry to riding home in the rear. That suited Harry just fine as it turns out, being that Aunt Daisy didn't have much to work with to clean up Dirk. It didn't take long for Harry to overhear a couple of choice comments pertaining to Dirk's odor.

When they got home, Uncle Vern stayed true to his word. Harry took licks from Uncle Vern's belt for what seemed like a couple of hours, but in reality things didn't last more than a few minutes. But it was during this interminable hellish period that Aunt Daisy ran in and yelled at Uncle Vern. Harry wasn't paying a whole lot of attention to what Uncle Vern was yelling at him, instead he concentrated on just trying to get through this as quickly as possible, so he missed whatever it was Uncle Vern had said. Uncle Vern did get Harry's attention when he invoked his parents' names, and that's when Aunt Daisy arrived.

"VERN!" she shouted. "You have to watch your mouth! You can't say that, remember?!?" It was at this point that Uncle Vern stopped, and after a couple of moments of awkward silence, told Harry to go to his 'room' without supper. There were very odd looks exchanged between Uncle Vern and Aunt Daisy as he left, as if Uncle Vern might have realized he said something very wrong.

It couldn't have been Uncle Vern being apologetic for casting aspersions at Harry's lineage, quite the opposite. Both Uncle Vern and Aunt Daisy didn't miss the opportunity to take pot-shots at Earl and Lilly Potter whenever the subject came up, which wasn't often if they could help it. Harry wondered if Uncle Vern had simply crossed the lines of good taste (huh, fat chance he laughed to himself) or if he had really said something important. They never talked to Harry much about his real parents other than to let them know that THEY were not his real parents. It must have been a terrible car wreck that took their lives and left Harry with the lightning bolt scar. Harry went to be with a very maudlin attitude.



The next morning went pretty much like they all had. Harry got up, pulled on some jeans and T-shirt and his boots, and set out to feed the animals. He always liked to put it that way because, after he got done with the horses and Blue (the family hound) and the chickens, he usually went indoors and was relegated to making breakfast for the Dursleys.

There was no sign of recognition of last night's events in anyone's face.except perhaps Uncle Vern, and the only recognition of last night's events he seemed to display was that he clearly didn't think he'd given Harry nearly enough swats.

Being that it was summer they didn't have to worry about catching the bus to school. After breakfast was done, Harry was on KP while the rest of the family generally went into the den and positioned themselves for a lengthy day in front of the television.

While Harry was finishing his cleaning, and envelope came fluttering in through one of the window vents. It was not uncommon for the wind to have odd patterns, and the occasional dust devil could pick stuff up and carry it an impressive distance, so Harry didn't consider it all that odd.until he read who the enveloped was addressed to:

Harry Potter

The RV against the pole

Rural route 4

Harry gaped openly. He'd never received any mail before. Oh sure, Uncle Vern and Aunt Daisy would gladly hand him the 'occupant' envelopes, which were usually advertisements for things nobody wanted. This, however, was an entirely different matter. This was addressed directly to him. There were no stamps, no postmark, no return address. It was a made of a fairly thick paper, he noticed, and near one edge it looked like it had been scraped against a couple of very sharp and pointy things.

Harry dawdled a bit too long in his shock, and Dirk noticed him holding the letter and quickly snatched it from Harry's grasp. "Give that back! It's mine!" shouted Harry as Dirk began giggling. Dirk ran into the den yelling "Hey, check this out! Harry got mail!!" Uncle Vern and Aunt Daisy pried their attention away from the television to see what Dirk and Harry were arguing over. Indeed, Dirk held an envelope that Harry was trying to retrieve. Uncle Vern stood up and took it, and Dirk certainly offered up no resistance. Harry resigned with one more "It's mine, it's addressed to me."

Uncle Vern eyed it suspiciously at first. Very suspiciously because it was indeed addressed to Harry. Aunt Lilly got up to look at it about the time that Uncle Vern turned it over and saw the wax seal, stamped with "Hogwarts School of Wizardry" and a crest.

Harry noticed that both Uncle Vern and Aunt Daisy went immediately pale once they turned the envelope over. He mentally kicked himself for not having done that. Obviously the return address showed on the back flap of the envelope, and not in the upper left-hand corner of the front as most mail has it.

Aunt Daisy was still speechless, she just gave out this little whimper and brought her hand to her mouth as if she had just received some really bad news. Uncle Vern turned redder by the moment as he started to tear up the envelope.

"Hey!" protested Harry. "That's mine! It's addressed to me and I want it!"

Uncle Vern gave him a look so serious, so menacing, that Harry's voice got caught in his throat. "This ain't got nuthin' to do with you, boy. NUTHIN'. You hear me? Now forget about it and git back to your chores."

Harry skulked back into the kitchen and put the remaining dishes away. He spent the rest of the day mechanically going through his daily chores, but his mind never got off the envelope addressed directly to him.

The next day, again, started much like the day before which had started like most of the summer days before that. He got dressed, fed the animals, and this time while cleaning the dishes he was actively looking out the window to see what he could see. He made it a point to leave one of the windows open, and when Aunt Daisy asked him why he had a window open on a summer morning when they had the air conditioning going inside the trailer, Harry replied that it helped cool the kitchen down faster and should save a few bucks on their electric bill. Aunt Daisy accepted that with just the remonstration of "just be sure you close it when you're finished."

Harry was hoping for an encore performance of yesterday. Of course he realized the likelihood of that happening again was virtually slim. Harry looked down to get the next dish and jumped in surprise when an envelope hit him square in the forehead.

It was thick enough that when it fell in the sink it did not absorb much water, but it didn't matter. Harry's brief exclamation was enough to bring Aunt Daisy into the kitchen and she immediately spotted the envelope.

"Oh NO!" Aunt Daisy wailed as she picked it up. She turned it so, again, Harry could not see the seal on the back. Uncle Vern came in and managed to be the only one of the family to perform an encore performance of the day before, turning redder with every tear of the envelope. He then pushed Harry aside, turned on the taps and stuffed the shredded remnants down the garbage disposal, and turned it on. Harry's second envelope went down the drain with a sickening, sucking growl of the mechanical monster that lived under the sink and had a voracious appetite for anything you cared to give it.

Harry's brief thought of 'well, that was over quickly' was premature. Uncle Vern rounded on him and demanded, "where in the hell did THAT come from?!?" Harry froze momentarily, and just pointed to the window. Uncle Vern slammed the window shut and locked it. "I dunno where yer getting' those things from, boy, but you'd better STOP." Harry was again speechless, he had no idea where they were coming from, or from who, and what's more there was a new sound in the kitchen. Aunt Daisy was actually crying. Weeping would be a better word, thought Harry. He couldn't understand how him having a letter addressed to him, two days in a row, coming in through the window could make Aunt Daisy so upset.until he thought about that chain of events then started to see how, yeah, that could probably wig someone out pretty good.

Aunt Daisy took a few minutes to regain her composure. She was really upset. Whatever it was about all of this, she seemed to be the only one really having trouble dealing with it. Uncle Vern would get really mad, but then once he'd torn up the offending envelope he was pretty much over it. Dirk didn't pay it much mind, but then.well that joke almost writes itself now doesn't it?!?

So again, Harry spent the day wondering about these mysterious envelopes. He spent the night wondering about them as well. So much so he had trouble feeling sleepy at all. He got up and gazed out one of the windows in the RV. He noticed a couple of owls perched on one of the fences, and he watched them for awhile to see if they went after anything. They didn't. Harry wasn't sure how long he stayed up watching them, but it was a good couple of hours, and they didn't budge. Harry finally got tired and fell asleep.

The next morning went the same as the first, until after breakfast that is. Aunt Daisy was going to do the dishes. She usually did them when he and Dirk had to go to school, but this was summer and she enjoyed not having to do them. But today, she was going to do them. Harry could not help but notice she kept the window shut and locked.

Harry didn't have a lot to do around the trailer, and Uncle Vern tersely asked Harry to stay inside today. Harry obliged, of course he had little choice. It did not take long before Harry longed to be doing his chores than sitting around the den watching televisual pablum that was put out on a daily basis. Harry sulked, but at least he was quiet, Uncle Vern was quiet, Aunt Daisy was occupied so she was quiet, and Dirk was nowhere to be found so he was blissfully without that little annoyance.

It was almost noon when the first one came. An envelope shot through the slot in the door. Harry wanted to go get it but was intercepted by a very serious look on Uncle Vern's face. He stomped over and as he stooped to pick up the envelope, another one came through the slot. Then another. Then they started coming one right after the other, and eventually it grew into a stream of envelopes. There was a small pile of envelopes in the entryway in just a couple of minutes. Harry couldn't help but grin, by now he recognized the color and shape of the envelopes, and the ink used to address them as looking exactly like the first two that had arrived. He could see that they all had seals on the back, to, but could not read them. Uncle Vern of course was reacting much as he had the first two days, except moreso with the multitude of envelopes that had arrived.

It was Aunt Daisy who first noticed them. Harry and Uncle Vern were far more concerned with trying to get their hands on the envelopes. Aunt Daisy let out one of those squeaky screams she seemed famous for, with a look of stark terror in her eyes. Uncle Vern looked at her, puzzled, and demanded "Well, WHAT?"

Aunt Daisy simply pointed out the window. Harry and Uncle Vern's gaze followed her outstretched finger, to the front yard. There were owls everywhere. On the ground, on the fence posts, on the truck, all in the trees.just everywhere. And not just the common barn owls, either. Harry spotted some that he didn't think were from around here. He couldn't understand why they were all here, either, but then he also didn't see what there was to be frightened of.it was just kinda weird, that's all.

Surprisingly, Harry noticed that both Uncle Vern and Aunt Daisy had a glimmer of recognition on their faces. Harry got the idea they may know exactly what was going on. Before he could ask anything, however, Uncle Vern faced him. "Look, boy. This won't stand, ya hear me? We ain't gonna sit around here and get buried in envelopes and swarmed by owls." He looked at Aunt Daisy "Go find Dirk, and pack a couple o' bags. We're leavin'. Harry, you come with me."

Harry was stunned. He wasn't sure what he was in for but he made himself promise to pay more attention to what Uncle Vern might say. Instead, Uncle Vern didn't say much of anything. He went back to their bedroom, retrieved an old suitcase, and led Harry out to the RV. He faced Harry and said "Pack some clothes, we're fixin' to leave in five minutes."

Sure enough, five minutes later when Harry emerged from his RV, Aunt Daisy and Dirk were already in the truck, and Uncle Vern was headed for Harry. He grabbed Harry's suitcase from him told him 'git in the truck.'

They were on the road a minute later.





Notes and Glossary:

I can't think of much new in this boring little chapter. I definitely have a direction to go with it, but I had to break things up to keep them from being too ponderously long.

Oh yeah, I moved this from the Harry Potter author fic's to just 'Harry Potter'.I was informed I had the original in the wrong spot. Sorry 'bout that!

Some of the 'Southern' elements in this chapter are perhaps a bit more subtle. The term "fixin' to" is very common, meaning you are preparing to do something, or almost ready to. I think the comedienne Brent Butler does a routine around that particular phrase.

The reference to "KP" is an old military term. It stands for Kitchen Police or Kitchen Patrol or something like that, anyway the upshot of it is you worked in the kitchen.

I gave the Dursley's a dog and named it 'Blue'.that comes from another movie "No Time For Sergaents" with Andy Griffith. Yes, it's old, but it's flipping hysterical. The book is of course better but the movie is well worth seeing. If you see it you'll get the type of animal (and behavior) I had in mind.

Owls aren't foreign to the South. Of course a snow owl won't be seen, but we have 'barn owls' aplenty.

The term 'dawdle' means to waste time, to poke along, to delay.