Alanna takes driving lessons (the horror!), part three:

Alanna buys a car



"You know we're going to have to get another car, don't you?" said Mr. Bill (who -miraculously- made it back from the 'trip' though the station wagon -sadly- did not. [Why does it always happen to the station wagon? Why??!!!] )

"Yeah. can't we just use yours?" asked Alanna -thinking of the perfect bright red mustang with a glazed look. "After what happened to the station wagon?! *Bob looks thoughtful for a moment* Tempting, but I don't think we should. Company car you know."

"Oh." said Alanna, severely disappointed, "Then where are we going to get another car?"

Bob smiled, Owen pops up out of nowhere and says "Jolly!" No one seems to notice.

*a very long bus ride (made longer by all of those annoying songs -you know the ones) and 8,736,457,457,475 'Jolly's' later Alanna and Co. arrive at the car dealership*

Alanna, Bob and Owen get off of the bus, Owen immediately yells "Jolly!!!" with all of his might and rushes off to who-knows-where. No one seems to notice.

A walking eyesore came up beside Alanna. "How may I help you?" it said pleasantly with a smile that looked like it must hurt.

Bob stepped forward "Sir Alanna here wants to buy a car, she's learning how to drive."

"Oooooohhhhh, I see." The horrendous thing gave Alanna a look that made her want to shiver and then smiled -revealing teeth so bright they could block out the sun. He turned around and beckoned Alanna to follow him into the back lot of the dealership.

"One of these should suit you perfectly." It said with a voice that was much too smooth for Alanna's liking. She looked around him and saw a whole lot of broken-down Station Wagons just like the one she had just disposed of. Alanna groaned. Bob grinned. Owen (again appearing out of nowhere) said "Not Jolly." and disappeared again.

Mr. Bill walked into the lot and twirled around in circles -with a sparkle in his eyes he said "I just can't decide! They're all so wonderful!!"

Alanna smacked herself in the forehead and nearly fell down.

Bob walked over to Alanna and said excitedly "Alanna, why don't you choose?"

Alanna groaned again and began casting about for the least ramshackle of the cars until -finally- she found it. A beautiful red-violet Ford Escort (kind of ironic -isn't it?).

Alanna grinned and pointed "I want this one."

Bob frowned "Not my first choice -but you're the one who has to drive it so... Dealer! Come here!"

It was a different one this time, this one had a mouth big enough to shove a cow into and was as repulsive and vulgar as the other had been.

"Ahhhh! The Escort! A fine selection -and this one comes with a Reader-writer-roto-rooter-radiator! Of course you know, that brings the warranty down to only 2 days."

"We'll take it! Pay the man, Alanna."

"What's so special about this writer-reader-rooter-rotor-radiater thing anyway?" Alanna asked as the salesman demanded an outlandish price.

" That's a Reader-writer-roto-rooter-radiator, Dear, and I'm sure you'll find out." Alanna was really getting sick of that smile now -she really felt like punching the guy- but she restrained herself (dang it!).

The dealer handed over the keys to the car and Bob & Alanna got into the not-so-new car. Owen screamed 'JOLLY' as he sped by in a convertible. No one seemed to notice.

Next Episode (coming soon to a monitor near you!): Alanna and the Palace Plumbing (the horror!) A.N.~ Don't forget to review! ^_~