Have just read part of possibly one of the worst mary-sue's EVER. Was even tempted to MST it. Decided not to after I realised I couldn't get part the first paragraph without cringing too much. Also found myself shouting 'MARY SUE' at my computer screen. Very disturbing. *shudders* Wasn't a LOTR one. Just thought I should share that with you all.... And oooh! Feedback from the torture chapter. There are some sick puppies out there amongst you lot. And thanks to Starbrat for those descriptions of torture. I don't think I've heard those before - although I have heard of similar rituals. Weird isn't it - the way something so utterly despicable is so fascinating? Hmm. The human brain is a fucked up place... Anyway, it's ain't mine, but I'm having fun messing around with it. Soz. J. R. R.

Animal.

Instinctively, my hands came up and grabbed the dagger, trying to knock the blade away from me. Thingaladion (for it was he) was not suspecting such a quick reaction and I managed to catch him off balance.

With strength I didn't know I possessed I threw him to the floor and landed on top of him, where I proceeded to beat the hell out of him. Amazing! My mind thought as I threw yet another punch at his now very bruised face, I've been in Middle Earth less than a week and I've had more violent episodes here than I've had in the rest of my life. Put together!

"And y'know what!" I pronounced proudly back to my mind. "I'm actually GOOD at it too!" I grinned and made to punch Thingaladion again.

***

Ten seconds later I was grabbed and thrown across the room by a severely pissed looking Veborion.

"You dare lay hands on my kin!" He thundered.

"Wha?" I was dazed from where my head had collided with the chains on the wall. How ironic, it seems that the torture devices can inflict pain after all I thought sourly.

"You will pay dearly for this." Veborion continued striding across the room to where I was.

"But..."

"And I will make you regret you ever even considered that..."

"Dammit Veborion you idiot!" I howled it frustration at just how dense this elf could be.

"Coming to Middle Earth was a good idea." Veborion finished as he finally stood in front of me, glaring down at me as I struggled to stand.

"Look you brainless elf he's trying to kill..." The words died on my lips as I saw Veborion's grimace of shock and pain.

Thingaladion had thrown the knife into Veborion's back whilst we were so busy arguing. He smirked as he saw the look of horror on my face and then saw the expression on Veborion's as Veborion turned to face him.

"You..."

"Yes. Me." He answered smugly.

"Et tu, Brute?" I muttered.

***

So there we were. Veborion slowly sinking to the floor as blood poured out of his wound, Thingaladion looking unbelievably smug watching him and me, me who was completely incapable of saying or doing anything. Let alone doing anything useful like calling for help or falling to my knees and trying to stop the bleeding. No I just stood there like a complete fool.

Idiot.

**********************

ooooooh! Shock horror! Will Vebby die? Will Thingy get his comeuppance? And how the hell am I gonna get out of this one? Tune in next time and find out! But in the meantime R&R please!

'Et tu Brute?' literally - and you Brutus? Spoken by Caesar as he realises that his best friend has just stabbed him. Taken from Shakespeare's Julius Caesar Act 3 Scene 1. The lines are as follows:

Casca: Speak, hands for me! [Conspirators stab Caesar. Casca strikes first, Brutus the last blow]

Caesar: Et tu, Brute? - Then fall, Caesar! [Dies]

Cinna: Liberty! Freedom! Tyranny is dead!

Now I'm plagiarising Shakespeare. My old English teacher would be so proud. I actually remembered something she taught for a change...