Chapter Twenty-Five
(Later - At the Hospital)
Chloe walked down the hallway, staring at the names on the office doors as she passed them. She had Brady's letter still folded into the back pocket of her jeans. Even though she knew it was coming eventually, she was still emotionally shaken by Brady's sudden departure. She paused outside the door with the familiar name on it. Dr. Marlena Evans.
She turned the knob and quietly crept into the front office where Marlena's secretary was busy typing away at her computer. Chloe hesitantly spoke up, hating to interrupt her.
"Excuse me."
The young woman looked up from her work and smiled cordially at her. "Good morning, what can I do for you?"
"I'm uhm, a friend of Dr. Evans' family. I was wondering if she was busy, I need to speak to her."
"She's not in with a patient right now, so I can check for you. What's your name, miss?"
"It's Chloe... Chloe Lane."
She nodded and picked up her phone pressing a button that rang into Marlena's office. "Dr. Evans... There's a young lady out here asking to speak to you, a Miss Chloe Lane... Yes, yes. Alright."
Marlena's secretary hung up the phone and turned to Chloe. "Go on in, Miss Lane."
Chloe smiled in appreciation as she headed to Marlena's door. "Thank you."
She turned the knob and peeked her head around the door. Marlena motioned for her to come in and smiled at her. "Come on in, have a seat."
Chloe nodded and took a seat across the desk from Marlena. She sighed softly and smiled weakly at her. "Brady... He's gone."
"I know. John went with him this morning. I'm sorry, Chloe."
"No, no, I'm okay. I'm glad to hear that his father went with him."
Marlena nodded in reply. "John is just going to be with him a few days, to make sure everything is set up for him, and that the physical therapy appointments are all set to go. Listen, Chloe... I don't mean to pry... I know some of the reasons that Brady left town, but I don't know all the reasons. Are you taking all of this okay?"
Chloe sighed heavily and shrugged. "I... I guess so. I knew it was coming, and we talked about it, but now that it's happening... Well, it's not as easy as I thought it would be. So, now I wonder if this is a big mistake. It sounded like a good idea at the time, but now I don't know. We even made this stupid agreement not to call each other, just letters and e-mails, that's all. It's supposed to make it 'less painful' if we don't have to hear each other's voices every day. And, now I feel stupid. I feel like I want to get on an airplane right now and follow him and bring him home."
"And Brady... Is that what he would want you to do?"
"No, he wouldn't. And that's why I'm here. I need to keep my end up the bargain, to do what he's asking me to do."
Marlena looked at her curiously. "And what is he asking you to do?"
Chloe paused and bit her lower lip nervously. "Is this conversation on a personal or professional level?"
"It's on whatever level you want. You're like a member of our family, and anything you need to discuss with me, you can do it anytime. I'm here to listen, and if you ask for my advice, I will do my best. Or, if you want to have these talks on a regular basis, formally, we can set up appointments with my secretary. It's up to you."
"Considering what I have to do... We might need to do this on a regular basis. It's so hard for me to do this... I've spent so many years being independent, and only having myself to rely on. And, now I have to ask for help. And, it's not easy for me to have to rely on other people. I'm not used to being needy."
Marlena nodded in understanding. "But, there's nothing wrong with asking for help, Chloe. It doesn't make you any less strong than you are. None of us can only rely on ourselves one hundred percent of the time. That's what we have friends, family and shrinks for."
Chloe laughed softly and nodded. "I know... And that's why I'm here. I've been dealing with a lot of personal issues for my entire life, and I've never sought help for them. And, I probably should have. Especially now. I need to start my relationship with Brady on a clean slate. I need to get rid of all the horrible things that have been haunting me since I was a child, and there is this one thing in particular that I need to get over."
"Phillip?"
Chloe looked downward and placed her hand on her forehead, trying to hold her tears back. She knew that therapy was built to make you cry, she just didn't want to do it right off the bat. Chloe nodded slightly and Marlena continued.
"I think I understand. You feel guilty, somewhat responsible, for Phillip's actions. And, whether that feeling is justified or not, it doesn't make a difference. It's there, and it needs to be dealt with."
Chloe looked back up at her and nodded in agreement. "That's it. And, it's not just his most recent actions that I feel responsible for. It's everything. I can recognize the fact that I dealt with my relationship with him incorrectly from the very beginning. I made a lot of mistakes, like continuing to take him back every time he screwed up, and believe me, I regret it. And, I don't want to make ANY mistakes with Brady. I want it to be perfect. We both do."
Marlena smiled reassuringly at her. "Chloe, I know that you had a difficult childhood, and part of your therapy will be dealing with that as well as your problems with Phillip. It's going to be a painful process. But, as someone who has been in this business for many many years, you can trust me when I say that everything will be better just because you made the decision to come here today."
"I hope so. Because if I don't get better... I'm scared. I'm scared that Brady won't come back."
"You have nothing to worry about. You will get over this. It may take some time, and it may seem like you never will. But, every day a little piece of you will heal, and before you know it, everything will be just fine. And, Brady will be back -- just like that."
Chloe felt a couple of stray tears start their journey down her cheeks and she attempted a weak smile. "I... I love him so much. And, I need him, and he needs me. I've never felt anything like that before. I've never been needed, and wanted, and loved this way before. It's just so strong. I just don't want to lose it."
Marlena stood from her desk chair and walked around to the chair beside Chloe's. She sat down, and pulled the girl she had come to know as an honorary family member into a warm embrace. "Chloe, I know how scary this is. Love is a powerful thing, it's strong, and sometimes it just knocks you off your feet. But, it's also a miracle. It can overcome anything. All of this pain and guilt you have inside is nothing in the face of how strong your love is. All of the faith and hope that you gave to Brady when he was in his coma, use it now to get past this. You will overcome this obstacle, as long as you believe that you can."
Chloe sniffled and wiped her tears away with the back of her hand, leaning out of the embrace and smiling in appreciation. "Thank you, thank you so much."
"There's no need to thank me. There is nothing I want more in this world than for my children to be happy. I know that you and Brady belong together, Chloe. I saw it every day that you stood by his side during his coma. And, I will do everything I can to make sure that you stay together. I am always here for you if you need to talk. But, can I ask you one favor?"
"Uhm, sure, anything you want..."
Marlena looked at her cautiously and placed a hand on her arm. "Please, let your mother in, Chloe. I know that the two of you haven't always gotten along, and there's still a lot of pain to work out before you can have the kind of relationship that a mother and daughter should have. But, she's there, and she wants you to open up to her. Your mother loves you, and you need to open your heart to that."
Chloe sighed heavily and looked away. "I just... I'm afraid. I'm scared to talk to her. She's hidden a lot from me, and I do the same to her. I hide myself, because I'm afraid of getting hurt again. I'm afraid of losing her love."
"Chloe... She's your mother. She will love you no matter what you say or do. Parents don't just love their children when it's convenient or when they're behaving the way they want them to. Parents love their children every second of the day for their entire lives, no matter what. And, I'd wager a guess that she's probably just as afraid as you are."
"You're probably right, I know. And, I want a good relationship with her. I... I look at the way you and Belle are, and it makes me jealous. It makes me sad that I don't have that with my mother."
Marlena rubbed her arm comfortingly. "But, you can. Just be open and honest with her, talk to her. That's all it takes. Don't just be her daughter, be her friend. And, I would give Nancy the same advice too. The reason why Belle and I are so close is because we're not just mother and daughter, we're friends. She can talk to me about anything, and she always has been able to."
Chloe nodded and smiled at her. "You're right, I know you are. I may not show it very often, but I do love my mother. I always have, even if I don't act like it sometimes."
"I know you do. And Nancy knows it too, but you need to tell her that, and show her." Marlena looked at the clock on the wall out of the corner of her eye and then looked back at Chloe. "Now, I'm sorry I have to cut this so short, but I do have a patient coming in a few minutes. I should have some time free tomorrow, if you want to come back and we'll talk longer. Just schedule it with my secretary, okay?"
Chloe stood from her chair and Marlena stood with her, walking her towards the door. "I will do that. Thank you for listening, and talking, and for wanting to help me."
Marlena hugged her again and smiled. "Chloe, you really have become a member of this family, especially over the past few weeks. It's really not a problem for me, I want to help you because I care about you."
"Thank you, that means a lot to me."
"You're welcome. And, I will see you tomorrow."
Chloe nodded and exited quickly, closing the door behind her. She stopped at the desk and made an appointment for the following afternoon. And although it made her nervous to be starting therapy, she realized deep down that it was a step she should have taken over two years ago. She knew she had to do this, and not just for Brady, but for herself and for her future.
***
(Which reminds me... Whatever happened to Jennifer going to see Marlena for therapy? She had like two appointments last year, and that's the last we heard of it. Considering recent events, that girl needs to get her ass right back to Marlena's office because her therapy is NOT done.
Heck, half of Salem needs a therapist. And with a past like Chloe's, that girl should be seeking some professional help too.)
(Later - At the Hospital)
Chloe walked down the hallway, staring at the names on the office doors as she passed them. She had Brady's letter still folded into the back pocket of her jeans. Even though she knew it was coming eventually, she was still emotionally shaken by Brady's sudden departure. She paused outside the door with the familiar name on it. Dr. Marlena Evans.
She turned the knob and quietly crept into the front office where Marlena's secretary was busy typing away at her computer. Chloe hesitantly spoke up, hating to interrupt her.
"Excuse me."
The young woman looked up from her work and smiled cordially at her. "Good morning, what can I do for you?"
"I'm uhm, a friend of Dr. Evans' family. I was wondering if she was busy, I need to speak to her."
"She's not in with a patient right now, so I can check for you. What's your name, miss?"
"It's Chloe... Chloe Lane."
She nodded and picked up her phone pressing a button that rang into Marlena's office. "Dr. Evans... There's a young lady out here asking to speak to you, a Miss Chloe Lane... Yes, yes. Alright."
Marlena's secretary hung up the phone and turned to Chloe. "Go on in, Miss Lane."
Chloe smiled in appreciation as she headed to Marlena's door. "Thank you."
She turned the knob and peeked her head around the door. Marlena motioned for her to come in and smiled at her. "Come on in, have a seat."
Chloe nodded and took a seat across the desk from Marlena. She sighed softly and smiled weakly at her. "Brady... He's gone."
"I know. John went with him this morning. I'm sorry, Chloe."
"No, no, I'm okay. I'm glad to hear that his father went with him."
Marlena nodded in reply. "John is just going to be with him a few days, to make sure everything is set up for him, and that the physical therapy appointments are all set to go. Listen, Chloe... I don't mean to pry... I know some of the reasons that Brady left town, but I don't know all the reasons. Are you taking all of this okay?"
Chloe sighed heavily and shrugged. "I... I guess so. I knew it was coming, and we talked about it, but now that it's happening... Well, it's not as easy as I thought it would be. So, now I wonder if this is a big mistake. It sounded like a good idea at the time, but now I don't know. We even made this stupid agreement not to call each other, just letters and e-mails, that's all. It's supposed to make it 'less painful' if we don't have to hear each other's voices every day. And, now I feel stupid. I feel like I want to get on an airplane right now and follow him and bring him home."
"And Brady... Is that what he would want you to do?"
"No, he wouldn't. And that's why I'm here. I need to keep my end up the bargain, to do what he's asking me to do."
Marlena looked at her curiously. "And what is he asking you to do?"
Chloe paused and bit her lower lip nervously. "Is this conversation on a personal or professional level?"
"It's on whatever level you want. You're like a member of our family, and anything you need to discuss with me, you can do it anytime. I'm here to listen, and if you ask for my advice, I will do my best. Or, if you want to have these talks on a regular basis, formally, we can set up appointments with my secretary. It's up to you."
"Considering what I have to do... We might need to do this on a regular basis. It's so hard for me to do this... I've spent so many years being independent, and only having myself to rely on. And, now I have to ask for help. And, it's not easy for me to have to rely on other people. I'm not used to being needy."
Marlena nodded in understanding. "But, there's nothing wrong with asking for help, Chloe. It doesn't make you any less strong than you are. None of us can only rely on ourselves one hundred percent of the time. That's what we have friends, family and shrinks for."
Chloe laughed softly and nodded. "I know... And that's why I'm here. I've been dealing with a lot of personal issues for my entire life, and I've never sought help for them. And, I probably should have. Especially now. I need to start my relationship with Brady on a clean slate. I need to get rid of all the horrible things that have been haunting me since I was a child, and there is this one thing in particular that I need to get over."
"Phillip?"
Chloe looked downward and placed her hand on her forehead, trying to hold her tears back. She knew that therapy was built to make you cry, she just didn't want to do it right off the bat. Chloe nodded slightly and Marlena continued.
"I think I understand. You feel guilty, somewhat responsible, for Phillip's actions. And, whether that feeling is justified or not, it doesn't make a difference. It's there, and it needs to be dealt with."
Chloe looked back up at her and nodded in agreement. "That's it. And, it's not just his most recent actions that I feel responsible for. It's everything. I can recognize the fact that I dealt with my relationship with him incorrectly from the very beginning. I made a lot of mistakes, like continuing to take him back every time he screwed up, and believe me, I regret it. And, I don't want to make ANY mistakes with Brady. I want it to be perfect. We both do."
Marlena smiled reassuringly at her. "Chloe, I know that you had a difficult childhood, and part of your therapy will be dealing with that as well as your problems with Phillip. It's going to be a painful process. But, as someone who has been in this business for many many years, you can trust me when I say that everything will be better just because you made the decision to come here today."
"I hope so. Because if I don't get better... I'm scared. I'm scared that Brady won't come back."
"You have nothing to worry about. You will get over this. It may take some time, and it may seem like you never will. But, every day a little piece of you will heal, and before you know it, everything will be just fine. And, Brady will be back -- just like that."
Chloe felt a couple of stray tears start their journey down her cheeks and she attempted a weak smile. "I... I love him so much. And, I need him, and he needs me. I've never felt anything like that before. I've never been needed, and wanted, and loved this way before. It's just so strong. I just don't want to lose it."
Marlena stood from her desk chair and walked around to the chair beside Chloe's. She sat down, and pulled the girl she had come to know as an honorary family member into a warm embrace. "Chloe, I know how scary this is. Love is a powerful thing, it's strong, and sometimes it just knocks you off your feet. But, it's also a miracle. It can overcome anything. All of this pain and guilt you have inside is nothing in the face of how strong your love is. All of the faith and hope that you gave to Brady when he was in his coma, use it now to get past this. You will overcome this obstacle, as long as you believe that you can."
Chloe sniffled and wiped her tears away with the back of her hand, leaning out of the embrace and smiling in appreciation. "Thank you, thank you so much."
"There's no need to thank me. There is nothing I want more in this world than for my children to be happy. I know that you and Brady belong together, Chloe. I saw it every day that you stood by his side during his coma. And, I will do everything I can to make sure that you stay together. I am always here for you if you need to talk. But, can I ask you one favor?"
"Uhm, sure, anything you want..."
Marlena looked at her cautiously and placed a hand on her arm. "Please, let your mother in, Chloe. I know that the two of you haven't always gotten along, and there's still a lot of pain to work out before you can have the kind of relationship that a mother and daughter should have. But, she's there, and she wants you to open up to her. Your mother loves you, and you need to open your heart to that."
Chloe sighed heavily and looked away. "I just... I'm afraid. I'm scared to talk to her. She's hidden a lot from me, and I do the same to her. I hide myself, because I'm afraid of getting hurt again. I'm afraid of losing her love."
"Chloe... She's your mother. She will love you no matter what you say or do. Parents don't just love their children when it's convenient or when they're behaving the way they want them to. Parents love their children every second of the day for their entire lives, no matter what. And, I'd wager a guess that she's probably just as afraid as you are."
"You're probably right, I know. And, I want a good relationship with her. I... I look at the way you and Belle are, and it makes me jealous. It makes me sad that I don't have that with my mother."
Marlena rubbed her arm comfortingly. "But, you can. Just be open and honest with her, talk to her. That's all it takes. Don't just be her daughter, be her friend. And, I would give Nancy the same advice too. The reason why Belle and I are so close is because we're not just mother and daughter, we're friends. She can talk to me about anything, and she always has been able to."
Chloe nodded and smiled at her. "You're right, I know you are. I may not show it very often, but I do love my mother. I always have, even if I don't act like it sometimes."
"I know you do. And Nancy knows it too, but you need to tell her that, and show her." Marlena looked at the clock on the wall out of the corner of her eye and then looked back at Chloe. "Now, I'm sorry I have to cut this so short, but I do have a patient coming in a few minutes. I should have some time free tomorrow, if you want to come back and we'll talk longer. Just schedule it with my secretary, okay?"
Chloe stood from her chair and Marlena stood with her, walking her towards the door. "I will do that. Thank you for listening, and talking, and for wanting to help me."
Marlena hugged her again and smiled. "Chloe, you really have become a member of this family, especially over the past few weeks. It's really not a problem for me, I want to help you because I care about you."
"Thank you, that means a lot to me."
"You're welcome. And, I will see you tomorrow."
Chloe nodded and exited quickly, closing the door behind her. She stopped at the desk and made an appointment for the following afternoon. And although it made her nervous to be starting therapy, she realized deep down that it was a step she should have taken over two years ago. She knew she had to do this, and not just for Brady, but for herself and for her future.
***
(Which reminds me... Whatever happened to Jennifer going to see Marlena for therapy? She had like two appointments last year, and that's the last we heard of it. Considering recent events, that girl needs to get her ass right back to Marlena's office because her therapy is NOT done.
Heck, half of Salem needs a therapist. And with a past like Chloe's, that girl should be seeking some professional help too.)
