Disclaimer: I do not own The Legend of Zelda series. Nintendo does. Some guy named Shigeru Miyamoto created it. Don't like it? THEN SUE ME. "Rollout" is an AWESOME song by Ludicris!

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Meg: Great, kids. Welcome to Zelda Interviews with Meg the Poe! Now, when I count to three, you guys will yell it back at me, okay? One, two, three!

Audience: Welcome to Mario Interviews-

Meg: Not Mario--Zelda! Let's try it again. One.two.three.!

Audience: .

Meg: Aw, screw it. Anyway, welcome to interviews with, me, Meg the Poe. I don't know how many times we have said that, but anyway, today I will be interview Link.and the last name is scratched out.

(Link walks up and sits down in a seat on the stage, blowing kisses.)

Meg: Cut that out. Now Link, will please tell all the little boys and girls out there who you are, and what you do.

Link: Who am I? I am. *Sticks two grapes up his nostrils* Bloobidy-bloobidy- bloobidy-bloobidy-!

Meg: St-

Link: Bloobidy-bloobidy-bloobidy-bloobidy-!

Meg: Stop-

Link Bloobidy-bloobidy-bloobidy-bloobidy-!

Meg: YOU KNOW. I would slap you right now, but I don't think your brain would realize the concept of pain.

Audience Guy: So.. Link? Do you know any magic tricks?

Link: I. *Does corny fake move* .am. *Does another corny fake move* The master of magic! *Makes a bunny come out of his hat*

Meg: This is ludicrous.

Link: For my first trick. I will make Meg go out with me! *Sly grin*

Meg: What the heck-

Link: *Takes out a corny fake wand that is a rip-off of Harry Potter* When I count to three. say ALAKAZAM! One.two.three!

Audience Guy: Abracadabra!

Link: No, idiots, ALAKAZAM! Say it!

Audience Guy: It!

Link: Grrrr. okay. one.two.three!

Audience Guy: ..

Link: SCREW YOU!

Audience Guy: Ew. no!

~*~Author~*~: *Comes in* I just had a wonderful idea for this weird story and then. POOF. I forgot it. *Leaves*

Meg: That's enough of the funny business. Link? Who are your mother and father?

Link: Uh.. My mother and father? Well. I don't actually know my mother and father. but at least I get to see them everyday. :)

Meg: Okay, this is becoming a giant rip-off of a certain movie? Can anyone guess what movie that is? If you can, write it in your review! Now, anyway, Link, how do you feel about being turned into a cell-shaded, cat-like, smashed-pancake dork in Celda?

Link: It's cool! I get to have a talking rock instead of an annoying fairy! *Grabs Tatl and Navi and hocks them at the pawnshop* Wanna see my rock?

Meg: No, thank you.

Link: *Throws rock at some guy in the audience* Catch!

Meg: Link! What did I say last time about throwing rocks in the interview- stage-place-type-thingy?

Link: Hmmm. lemme see. Oh, yeah! "AUUUUUUUGH! OW, THAT HURTS!!!"

Meg: This is ludicrous.

Link: ROLLOUT, ROLLOUT, ROLLOUT! WHERE'D YA GET THAT PLATINUM CHAIN WITH THE DIAMOND DIMS?

Meg: Shut up!

Information Man: And this interview was brought to you byyyyyyyy, SAND. It's everywhere! Get used to it!

*End of the Interview*

Meg: Hey! I wasn't done yet!