Aftermath
He hurt.
He thought again to their escape. It hadn't been all that easy. He'd just about carried Hunt back to the Maru. His own arm pressing into his side where it propped up the Captain's weight, but he'd gotten them both back. Once that pain was withdrawn he'd kept his face impassive as he'd watched the boy. The engineer's face had become blank as he sat on the deck of the freighter, head against the bulkhead, eyes closed. It might have seemed that he was asleep as he sat there, but Tyr could tell his breathing was too uneven; even as he dealt with the reality of his own pain.
He assisted Hunt further onto the medical deck, then stood back as the others tended to the Captain and the boy. Stood back because there was nothing he could think to do. That annoyed him, perhaps even more than the other thing. The thing that he knew should be concerning him the most because he knew how important it was to his survival; and then again perhaps he was letting himself get distracted only because he hurt. Not very Nietzschean of him. Not at all.
Beka turned to him after helping Rev and Trance get the boy onto a bed but he turned away, pulling away from her as she reached toward him. He felt the concerned look cross her face, but outwardly ignored it. He stood there quietly for a few more minutes. Then once he felt properly invisible he left the med deck and walked slowy to his cabin. He barely made it inside before the pain of the writhing things inside him finally caused the sweat to break out on his brow and he barely had time to call for privacy mode before dropping to his knees, no longer able to fight the pain.
He knelt there hands on the deck trying to breathe through it, wondering how he would continue to mask it, concentrating on the one thing that he knew for sure, that he had to. Because he knew that was the truth for himself, he had to. Pulling in another breath he forced himself up and onto his bunk and collasped again. But sleep would not come, so he lay there allowing his thoughts to pull him back and forth, trying to decide what to do. Disgusted with himself because there was only one answer. The pain was there but he would survive, which meant it would go away in due time. He had no excuse to pamper himself.
He wouldn't let them know about it. Although they might say that his best self interest, maybe even his survival depended on it. But that was their weakness. No he couldn't let them know. He would not allow such a weakness in himself. He would not expose himself that way. So he wouldn't allow them to know. With that decision made he finally fell into an exhausted sleep.
He did not however sleep long, the things inside him coupled with his innate survival instincts pulling him from his much needed rest. Rising again he left his quarters and returned to med deck. In the dimly lit compartment he saw both Hunt and the boy asleep. The wretched purple one was hunched over a work station her back turned to him. As he stood there debating with himself what he would say to her she turned to him and gave him one of her annoying smiles. "I need to examine you." he heard her say. He shook his head, did she think he needed to be told the obvious? He followed her to another compartment and silently reclined on the indicated table.
He steeled himself then for what was to come. There was nothing of himself that he was willing to reveal to her. As she reached for his neck with a general anesthesia his hand became a vice grip on her wrist. "Local" he spat out vehemently.
"You want to die?" It was only his absolute need to maintain control of the situation that kept him from laughing at the confused look on her face. He eased his grip and stared at her as she administered the dose.
He swam up out of the haze and moved immediately to sit up. Her hand was as quickly on his chest but he pushed against her. She quietly told him what she had done, what her treatment had percipitated, that he had almost died and should remain under her care. But he couldn't allow himself that weakness. He swung his legs carefully off the table as he sat up. The pain that greeted him caused him to stop but he did not gasp, only closed his eyes and drew a careful breath. "I will be in my quarters." The effort not to show the pain almost overwhelmed him again but still he stood. She looked at him and sighed, shaking her head negatively she handed him the painkillers and directions before standing aside allowing him to leave the medical bay.
The tissue and muscles around the incision were tender with a continual sharp ache. As he moved he felt hot searing pains deep inside of him. His muscles screamed at him with every step but he kept up a steady pace. He was not ready to give up yet.
Despite the purple one's removal of the larvae there had been damage to several of his internal organs. Damage which was causing some of the pain, damage which had to heal. But there was also muscle pain. He pondered what she had told him, that the larvae in fighting her removal had released a toxin into his blood. A toxin that would take days to dissipate. So he would have to fight the pain. He considered the drugs he held in his hands a weakness, but unfortunately a necessary one.
He finally reached his quarters, keyed his access code, and wearily stepped in. As the door slid closed behind him his determination melted and he leaned against it, sliding down to the floor, his eyes closed. "Tyr?" He opened his eyes and lifted his head as the hologram flickered into existence before him. Why hadn't he called for privacy mode the minute he had stepped through the door, he berated himself. He closed his eyes and let his head rest back against the door again. "I am fine," he said firmly.
"You are not fine. Your heart rate, respiration, and temperature are all elevated; and you're hiding your grimace."
"I do not grimace," he said so forcefully that he had to open his mouth and take in a huge breath as the pain slashed across his abdomen. That only caused his lungs to burn all the more.
"You do it with your eyes," she responded tersly. "Why do you think you just closed them again? If you had wanted to convince me you were fine that action would seem to be contraindicated."
His eyes snapped open again and there was nothing he could do to hide his shock. Did she really know him so well? What else had he unknowingly revealed to her? Ship, he'd persisted in calling her. He should have been more careful, a lapse in judgement.
"Can you make it back to Med Deck or do I need to call Dylan?"
"I can make it to my bed, which is where I intend to go." He struggled to rise glaring at her as she remained there watching him, a hint of worry furrowing her brow.
"You're being awfully stubborn," she said in that matter-of-fact way that had riled him before and would again he was sure.
"I am neither stubborn or in need of any assistance." he said tersly. As he pulled his bedcovers back and lowered himself to a sitting position his eyes met hers. The challenge in them a clear indication that she should withdraw.
"You're sure?" Her brow furrowed again.
He shook his head negatively and pulled his legs up onto the bed drawing the covers around him as he called for lights out and privacy mode again.
As soon as the hologram responded to his commands and blinked out he pushed off the covers and shakily drew himself to his feet again. Pulling himself painfully to his head he got himself some water and swallowed down the pain medication Trance had given him. Returning to his bed he fell into a restless slumber.
He hurt.
He thought again to their escape. It hadn't been all that easy. He'd just about carried Hunt back to the Maru. His own arm pressing into his side where it propped up the Captain's weight, but he'd gotten them both back. Once that pain was withdrawn he'd kept his face impassive as he'd watched the boy. The engineer's face had become blank as he sat on the deck of the freighter, head against the bulkhead, eyes closed. It might have seemed that he was asleep as he sat there, but Tyr could tell his breathing was too uneven; even as he dealt with the reality of his own pain.
He assisted Hunt further onto the medical deck, then stood back as the others tended to the Captain and the boy. Stood back because there was nothing he could think to do. That annoyed him, perhaps even more than the other thing. The thing that he knew should be concerning him the most because he knew how important it was to his survival; and then again perhaps he was letting himself get distracted only because he hurt. Not very Nietzschean of him. Not at all.
Beka turned to him after helping Rev and Trance get the boy onto a bed but he turned away, pulling away from her as she reached toward him. He felt the concerned look cross her face, but outwardly ignored it. He stood there quietly for a few more minutes. Then once he felt properly invisible he left the med deck and walked slowy to his cabin. He barely made it inside before the pain of the writhing things inside him finally caused the sweat to break out on his brow and he barely had time to call for privacy mode before dropping to his knees, no longer able to fight the pain.
He knelt there hands on the deck trying to breathe through it, wondering how he would continue to mask it, concentrating on the one thing that he knew for sure, that he had to. Because he knew that was the truth for himself, he had to. Pulling in another breath he forced himself up and onto his bunk and collasped again. But sleep would not come, so he lay there allowing his thoughts to pull him back and forth, trying to decide what to do. Disgusted with himself because there was only one answer. The pain was there but he would survive, which meant it would go away in due time. He had no excuse to pamper himself.
He wouldn't let them know about it. Although they might say that his best self interest, maybe even his survival depended on it. But that was their weakness. No he couldn't let them know. He would not allow such a weakness in himself. He would not expose himself that way. So he wouldn't allow them to know. With that decision made he finally fell into an exhausted sleep.
He did not however sleep long, the things inside him coupled with his innate survival instincts pulling him from his much needed rest. Rising again he left his quarters and returned to med deck. In the dimly lit compartment he saw both Hunt and the boy asleep. The wretched purple one was hunched over a work station her back turned to him. As he stood there debating with himself what he would say to her she turned to him and gave him one of her annoying smiles. "I need to examine you." he heard her say. He shook his head, did she think he needed to be told the obvious? He followed her to another compartment and silently reclined on the indicated table.
He steeled himself then for what was to come. There was nothing of himself that he was willing to reveal to her. As she reached for his neck with a general anesthesia his hand became a vice grip on her wrist. "Local" he spat out vehemently.
"You want to die?" It was only his absolute need to maintain control of the situation that kept him from laughing at the confused look on her face. He eased his grip and stared at her as she administered the dose.
He swam up out of the haze and moved immediately to sit up. Her hand was as quickly on his chest but he pushed against her. She quietly told him what she had done, what her treatment had percipitated, that he had almost died and should remain under her care. But he couldn't allow himself that weakness. He swung his legs carefully off the table as he sat up. The pain that greeted him caused him to stop but he did not gasp, only closed his eyes and drew a careful breath. "I will be in my quarters." The effort not to show the pain almost overwhelmed him again but still he stood. She looked at him and sighed, shaking her head negatively she handed him the painkillers and directions before standing aside allowing him to leave the medical bay.
The tissue and muscles around the incision were tender with a continual sharp ache. As he moved he felt hot searing pains deep inside of him. His muscles screamed at him with every step but he kept up a steady pace. He was not ready to give up yet.
Despite the purple one's removal of the larvae there had been damage to several of his internal organs. Damage which was causing some of the pain, damage which had to heal. But there was also muscle pain. He pondered what she had told him, that the larvae in fighting her removal had released a toxin into his blood. A toxin that would take days to dissipate. So he would have to fight the pain. He considered the drugs he held in his hands a weakness, but unfortunately a necessary one.
He finally reached his quarters, keyed his access code, and wearily stepped in. As the door slid closed behind him his determination melted and he leaned against it, sliding down to the floor, his eyes closed. "Tyr?" He opened his eyes and lifted his head as the hologram flickered into existence before him. Why hadn't he called for privacy mode the minute he had stepped through the door, he berated himself. He closed his eyes and let his head rest back against the door again. "I am fine," he said firmly.
"You are not fine. Your heart rate, respiration, and temperature are all elevated; and you're hiding your grimace."
"I do not grimace," he said so forcefully that he had to open his mouth and take in a huge breath as the pain slashed across his abdomen. That only caused his lungs to burn all the more.
"You do it with your eyes," she responded tersly. "Why do you think you just closed them again? If you had wanted to convince me you were fine that action would seem to be contraindicated."
His eyes snapped open again and there was nothing he could do to hide his shock. Did she really know him so well? What else had he unknowingly revealed to her? Ship, he'd persisted in calling her. He should have been more careful, a lapse in judgement.
"Can you make it back to Med Deck or do I need to call Dylan?"
"I can make it to my bed, which is where I intend to go." He struggled to rise glaring at her as she remained there watching him, a hint of worry furrowing her brow.
"You're being awfully stubborn," she said in that matter-of-fact way that had riled him before and would again he was sure.
"I am neither stubborn or in need of any assistance." he said tersly. As he pulled his bedcovers back and lowered himself to a sitting position his eyes met hers. The challenge in them a clear indication that she should withdraw.
"You're sure?" Her brow furrowed again.
He shook his head negatively and pulled his legs up onto the bed drawing the covers around him as he called for lights out and privacy mode again.
As soon as the hologram responded to his commands and blinked out he pushed off the covers and shakily drew himself to his feet again. Pulling himself painfully to his head he got himself some water and swallowed down the pain medication Trance had given him. Returning to his bed he fell into a restless slumber.
