Author's note: Okay that was Madonna's song last time, now we are back at
one of my favorite singers at the moment – Celine Dion. Are you nerved that
I often use her lyrics? Tell me pls. This time the chapter involved lyrics
from "Super Love", from Celine's new album.
Today is a special day in Vienna, May 8th, the day of the German capitulation in 1945, nearly 60 years ago. The right and the left wing people are demonstration today in an very uncommon way, very noisy etc. People like these make me thinking why people aren't able to talk about their problems and thoughts, ideas and impressions. Maybe that's also a reason why I love writing. It's a way of talking, telling people a story in a very personal way.
Rating:
Archive: www.missparkerjarod.hollywood.com - you can post it on your side too, be sure that my name is on it and that's it & send me an email where I can find it!
Feedback: miss.parker@gmx.at or/and mary_eve_parker@yahoo.com
*************
CHAPTER 14 – SENSUAL & INNOCENT
*************
I was sitting in the kitchen, Jarod standing behind me. I hadn't told him about my dream and the babies' voices yet. His strong palms rested on my shoulders, massaging me.
So Mary tell me why are in you in Ireland?
We have to run, to run away from the Center but this time together. Jarod said
I am not the huntress anymore. Times have changed and so the roles.
But you are pregnant Mary. How long do you think that you might be able to run? A month maybe two from now. I just nodded in agreement. They were all right. Time was running.
We have to find a place where she can give birth to the baby. He said softly.
You haven't told him yet Mary, haven't you? The old lady asked me. Now I hadn't.
What haven't you told me ?
Okay where to start now? It was difficult. Parker try, he'll know how you mean it.
I had a dream ... my mum ... she was speaking with me ... She told me that there is more .... I will get triplets. My voice was shaking. I could hear them speaking with each other when I was in the bath tube and I can speak with them.
I couldn't believe how easy it was. But did it sound a bit realistic?
You mean .... like you and your mum ?
Yes something like that. I said and wanted to change the topic.
And now tell him the rest Mary, he has the right to know it.
Why Nanna, why can't you .... She looked at me in a soft and friendly way but her eyes told me that I have to tell him, that there is no way out!
Nanna, was a fantastic old lady. She was friendly and knew everything about me without telling her. It was like she could read my mind.
I think that this isn't the big secret she told you Mary, trust Jarod and tell him the truth.
You are right Nanna, it's not the big secret. Mamma also told me that ... I grabbed Jarod's hand, not to let him run away. She told me that Daddy and the Centre isn't interesting into catching us any longer, the just want the babies. All the stuff was planned. They are ... Tears were getting up my eyes. They are ....
What are they? he asked.
They are not mine .... he looked stunned they are ours.
How ... ? He seemed to be a bit perplex.
Once when I came home from the boarding school they brought me to the Renewal Wing to check me up. This was the only time they were able to take my ovaries. I don't know how, it was just a dream which told me the facts.
You mean that you are carrying my babies?
Jarod sat down on the chair next to me, putting his hand on my tight.
So that was the reason for the rape! Oh my god, I never thought that they would do something like that and never to you! They thought that you would go back to the Centre and never ask for the father of the baby ... babies ... and that you would hand them in voluntary. His voice was angry.
You have to be very careful with her Jarod. She will need a lot of help in the near future and after birth it will get more difficult to run away. Triplets are always a risk pregnancy and you aren't the youngest at all Mary. And the Centre is everywhere!
How much do you know about the Centre? Jarod asked. I was not able to think clear at the moment. I was just listening to the voices at the table.
My husband had been in the IRA and I worked with him when I came back and your mum to a boarding school. The IRA found out about the Centre many years ago when they started to built something like a Centre here in Ireland. But the IRA destroyed it finally and I lost my husband in this fight about the truth. Many people helped us fighting against the Centre and many died because of chemical stuff they were working with too.
When ? I asked nervously.
In the early 1950s when I remember it correctly. Nanna answered They never tried to re-establish something like a Centre here because the IRA has a lot of power and wouldn't allow it.
Didn't you know that Jarod? She asked him.
You mean that it's save here?
Yes it's save at the moment but it's possible that Mr. Parker will have a look on Ireland first. You never now!
Why ? I asked again.
Because he knows that it's save here!
How many countries do we have to go to Nanna?
Only a few ... Ireland of course ... South Africa and Austria and Finland at the moment but I think I have heard a rumour that they will start there soon too.
Austria ? Jarod asked. I mean Mary had been there for the whole boarding school time.
That's right and that's also the reason. He never wanted her to be observed.
My Daddy? I couldn't believe that he knew that I hate it to be observed and that I could really act bitchy if I find out.
Not your daddy honey, Mr. Parker!
Jarod looked at me in a way strange. I thought he might have known all that, the story of my dad and Mr. Parker.
Not her dad? was his answer.
Mr. Parker isn't her father. Thanks god for that. He just mold her, the way he wanted her to be.
And who is my daddy?
I don't know She said and stood and went up and down the kitchen, preparing something to eat. She'd never mentioned a name in her letters. She came back with two breads with butter and salt. But I am sure you could get the answers to all your question in your dreams. Feel free to ask her everything you want Mary.
I couldn't believe what had happened during the last days. Many things to be honest. I am a bit afraid of what will happen next when I look into the past. The Centre was behind us and it was only a matter of time when they would catch us. We had spent to much time in safety in Canada, too much.
Nanna looked at me, with a look which reminds me of Mamma.
Have you ever been in love? she asked me.
And this statement, question, brought me back to reality.
What ? I asked.
Have you ever been in love, really in love?
I nodded nervously.
And Mary?
What you wanna know Nanna? I snarled.
How it felt or how it feels like!
I smiled. It was long ago that I'd fallen in love.
Wonderful. It was like ... I was interrupted.
Like having butterflies in your belly ... like having rain on a sunny bright day .... like sugar in your coffee ... Jarod continued.
Don't speak of coffee now Jarod, please!
We both start laughing. It was funny how far Jarod brought me. I'd not smoked a cigarette or drunken a... well only one night ... since I was raped, and coffee it was more or less the same. Since the day we found out that I was pregnant, it was impossible to get a cup of coffee – only herbal teas. And it seemed like we both would have the same feelings.
His hand was gliding up and down my tight under the table.
To right to be true I thought.
Nanna brought me a hot chocolate. I hadn't had one since I was little. It's one of the things I left behind after mum's death. Everything happened to fast in my life, always without my permission and without that I was prepared for it – Mum's death, Thomas' death and now my pregnancy.
I loved Jarod ages ago and I love him now. He had always been the one and only. Tommy? Thomas has not been a mistake, save god no, but he wasn't Jarod. Maybe he would have been able to become as important as Jarod in my life but the Centre didn't allowed him and didn't gave me the time to try it. To let us grow together. But it was hard for me after his death. Jarod was phoning me every day after the funeral to ask me how I am and we had long discussions. Sometimes I only want to feel that somebody cares for me. It's true that Broots and Sydney were also there but they ... they act differently. Jarod was the one who talked to be, who brought me back into my life. I never said something about the funeral. Grieving was the only thing I could do. One night, I'll never forget it, he came to my house. It was a year after his death, the day exactly. I was drunken and in a very bad mood, aggressive and in a way unpredictable. He was just there to old me and to let me feel that there is still somebody around me, whom I allowed to hug me. It was not easy after Tommy's death and I am sure I made Broots' life really hard. I always gave him bad words and was very harsh. But they didn't say a word. They knew how much Thomas meant to me.
Thomas has always been a wonderful lover and a good friend but never the best. I'd never told him about my job and my past with Jarod. It had been impossible. I was afraid that he would leave me – and the time factor. Maybe I would have been brave one day to tell him and to quit my job and go with him, but I hadn't had a chance to think about it.
But now under Jarod's soft touches I felt the wetness which increased in my panties. Under all those circumstances it was possible to get very wet, only when he touched me. Jarod. He was my best friend and my first and only really big love. He had never said those three words to me. Sure he was the only one who showed some interest for me and my life and there has always been a bondage between us – now, our children.
I had decided to leave many things behind me on the day I went to mum's funeral. The decision hat been easy because I didn't understood what I was doing, I was a kid. I had never thought about them since this day, remembered what life had been.
Now it was different. Today being hold and having somebody around me was the most important thing for me. I didn't need sex, being hold my Jarod, a bit cuddling was much better and more intensive. It would be wonderful to feel him inside me but could this be the most important thing in my life? Of course not.
What is important in your life Parker? It's not that you are alone anymore. You aren't innocent anymore, you are going to be a mother. You are your mother. You have to trust Jarod and what he'll do for you because you can be sure that he's the one who will always help you and never be against you. He's the only one who will be there for you till the end comes, till it is time to say goodbye. Mamma sometimes I would wish that you could be here and help me, talk to Jarod. I really love him but how to say? I can't tell him just these words and wait for a responds to hope that it might be the one I am waiting for. Give me a hint or better tell him what I feel. Feel free to tell him everything but do it!
So Mary I think it's late now, time to go to bed. said Nanna.
I had finished my hot chocolate and not listened to Jarod and my mum's Nanny during the last couple of minutes.
Yes I am tired. The flight was long. I said and stood up. I went around the table and gave her a good night kiss on her cheek, like it would be a ceremonial, like I would be a small child. Jarod just shook hands with her and went up the stairs behind me.
**********
It as your first night in Dublin, together as a married couple in a double bed. I was nervous about what could happen this night.
Wanna go into the bathroom first Jarod? I asked him. He headed without a word into and let the door open. I wouldn't resist to watch him, getting out of the dark blue shirt and the black trousers, not jeans, trousers. They fit him better than the jeans, especially his ass was perfect in them. Like a Greek god.
Just go in, grab him and make love to him ... and than he would leave you and hate you for the rest of your life.
He was standing there just in brief black silk boxer shorts brushing his teeth. It looked like out from an old German Saga, perfect. All the muscles and the hairs on his chest. Ah I could jump on him and take him where he was right now. You don't want to fuck him Mary, you want that he makes love * to * you!
I was standing there and telling myself that I should get into a nightgown or pyjamas myself. I grabbed the silky one I had worn the last night in Canada and start to strip right in the room. I was not able to look if he was standing in the door watching me or not. If he would do it, I hope that he would get something into his mind without being told what to do next. Or that he get aroused, it would be enough for right now.
I only needed a confirmation for myself having a little sex appeal left, just a little. Now I stepped out of my panties and unhooked my black lace bra. My nipples got very sensual during the last days the lace made them red and hurt. Was it not a bit too early for that?
Today is a special day in Vienna, May 8th, the day of the German capitulation in 1945, nearly 60 years ago. The right and the left wing people are demonstration today in an very uncommon way, very noisy etc. People like these make me thinking why people aren't able to talk about their problems and thoughts, ideas and impressions. Maybe that's also a reason why I love writing. It's a way of talking, telling people a story in a very personal way.
Rating:
Archive: www.missparkerjarod.hollywood.com - you can post it on your side too, be sure that my name is on it and that's it & send me an email where I can find it!
Feedback: miss.parker@gmx.at or/and mary_eve_parker@yahoo.com
*************
CHAPTER 14 – SENSUAL & INNOCENT
*************
I was sitting in the kitchen, Jarod standing behind me. I hadn't told him about my dream and the babies' voices yet. His strong palms rested on my shoulders, massaging me.
So Mary tell me why are in you in Ireland?
We have to run, to run away from the Center but this time together. Jarod said
I am not the huntress anymore. Times have changed and so the roles.
But you are pregnant Mary. How long do you think that you might be able to run? A month maybe two from now. I just nodded in agreement. They were all right. Time was running.
We have to find a place where she can give birth to the baby. He said softly.
You haven't told him yet Mary, haven't you? The old lady asked me. Now I hadn't.
What haven't you told me ?
Okay where to start now? It was difficult. Parker try, he'll know how you mean it.
I had a dream ... my mum ... she was speaking with me ... She told me that there is more .... I will get triplets. My voice was shaking. I could hear them speaking with each other when I was in the bath tube and I can speak with them.
I couldn't believe how easy it was. But did it sound a bit realistic?
You mean .... like you and your mum ?
Yes something like that. I said and wanted to change the topic.
And now tell him the rest Mary, he has the right to know it.
Why Nanna, why can't you .... She looked at me in a soft and friendly way but her eyes told me that I have to tell him, that there is no way out!
Nanna, was a fantastic old lady. She was friendly and knew everything about me without telling her. It was like she could read my mind.
I think that this isn't the big secret she told you Mary, trust Jarod and tell him the truth.
You are right Nanna, it's not the big secret. Mamma also told me that ... I grabbed Jarod's hand, not to let him run away. She told me that Daddy and the Centre isn't interesting into catching us any longer, the just want the babies. All the stuff was planned. They are ... Tears were getting up my eyes. They are ....
What are they? he asked.
They are not mine .... he looked stunned they are ours.
How ... ? He seemed to be a bit perplex.
Once when I came home from the boarding school they brought me to the Renewal Wing to check me up. This was the only time they were able to take my ovaries. I don't know how, it was just a dream which told me the facts.
You mean that you are carrying my babies?
Jarod sat down on the chair next to me, putting his hand on my tight.
So that was the reason for the rape! Oh my god, I never thought that they would do something like that and never to you! They thought that you would go back to the Centre and never ask for the father of the baby ... babies ... and that you would hand them in voluntary. His voice was angry.
You have to be very careful with her Jarod. She will need a lot of help in the near future and after birth it will get more difficult to run away. Triplets are always a risk pregnancy and you aren't the youngest at all Mary. And the Centre is everywhere!
How much do you know about the Centre? Jarod asked. I was not able to think clear at the moment. I was just listening to the voices at the table.
My husband had been in the IRA and I worked with him when I came back and your mum to a boarding school. The IRA found out about the Centre many years ago when they started to built something like a Centre here in Ireland. But the IRA destroyed it finally and I lost my husband in this fight about the truth. Many people helped us fighting against the Centre and many died because of chemical stuff they were working with too.
When ? I asked nervously.
In the early 1950s when I remember it correctly. Nanna answered They never tried to re-establish something like a Centre here because the IRA has a lot of power and wouldn't allow it.
Didn't you know that Jarod? She asked him.
You mean that it's save here?
Yes it's save at the moment but it's possible that Mr. Parker will have a look on Ireland first. You never now!
Why ? I asked again.
Because he knows that it's save here!
How many countries do we have to go to Nanna?
Only a few ... Ireland of course ... South Africa and Austria and Finland at the moment but I think I have heard a rumour that they will start there soon too.
Austria ? Jarod asked. I mean Mary had been there for the whole boarding school time.
That's right and that's also the reason. He never wanted her to be observed.
My Daddy? I couldn't believe that he knew that I hate it to be observed and that I could really act bitchy if I find out.
Not your daddy honey, Mr. Parker!
Jarod looked at me in a way strange. I thought he might have known all that, the story of my dad and Mr. Parker.
Not her dad? was his answer.
Mr. Parker isn't her father. Thanks god for that. He just mold her, the way he wanted her to be.
And who is my daddy?
I don't know She said and stood and went up and down the kitchen, preparing something to eat. She'd never mentioned a name in her letters. She came back with two breads with butter and salt. But I am sure you could get the answers to all your question in your dreams. Feel free to ask her everything you want Mary.
I couldn't believe what had happened during the last days. Many things to be honest. I am a bit afraid of what will happen next when I look into the past. The Centre was behind us and it was only a matter of time when they would catch us. We had spent to much time in safety in Canada, too much.
Nanna looked at me, with a look which reminds me of Mamma.
Have you ever been in love? she asked me.
And this statement, question, brought me back to reality.
What ? I asked.
Have you ever been in love, really in love?
I nodded nervously.
And Mary?
What you wanna know Nanna? I snarled.
How it felt or how it feels like!
I smiled. It was long ago that I'd fallen in love.
Wonderful. It was like ... I was interrupted.
Like having butterflies in your belly ... like having rain on a sunny bright day .... like sugar in your coffee ... Jarod continued.
Don't speak of coffee now Jarod, please!
We both start laughing. It was funny how far Jarod brought me. I'd not smoked a cigarette or drunken a... well only one night ... since I was raped, and coffee it was more or less the same. Since the day we found out that I was pregnant, it was impossible to get a cup of coffee – only herbal teas. And it seemed like we both would have the same feelings.
His hand was gliding up and down my tight under the table.
To right to be true I thought.
Nanna brought me a hot chocolate. I hadn't had one since I was little. It's one of the things I left behind after mum's death. Everything happened to fast in my life, always without my permission and without that I was prepared for it – Mum's death, Thomas' death and now my pregnancy.
I loved Jarod ages ago and I love him now. He had always been the one and only. Tommy? Thomas has not been a mistake, save god no, but he wasn't Jarod. Maybe he would have been able to become as important as Jarod in my life but the Centre didn't allowed him and didn't gave me the time to try it. To let us grow together. But it was hard for me after his death. Jarod was phoning me every day after the funeral to ask me how I am and we had long discussions. Sometimes I only want to feel that somebody cares for me. It's true that Broots and Sydney were also there but they ... they act differently. Jarod was the one who talked to be, who brought me back into my life. I never said something about the funeral. Grieving was the only thing I could do. One night, I'll never forget it, he came to my house. It was a year after his death, the day exactly. I was drunken and in a very bad mood, aggressive and in a way unpredictable. He was just there to old me and to let me feel that there is still somebody around me, whom I allowed to hug me. It was not easy after Tommy's death and I am sure I made Broots' life really hard. I always gave him bad words and was very harsh. But they didn't say a word. They knew how much Thomas meant to me.
Thomas has always been a wonderful lover and a good friend but never the best. I'd never told him about my job and my past with Jarod. It had been impossible. I was afraid that he would leave me – and the time factor. Maybe I would have been brave one day to tell him and to quit my job and go with him, but I hadn't had a chance to think about it.
But now under Jarod's soft touches I felt the wetness which increased in my panties. Under all those circumstances it was possible to get very wet, only when he touched me. Jarod. He was my best friend and my first and only really big love. He had never said those three words to me. Sure he was the only one who showed some interest for me and my life and there has always been a bondage between us – now, our children.
I had decided to leave many things behind me on the day I went to mum's funeral. The decision hat been easy because I didn't understood what I was doing, I was a kid. I had never thought about them since this day, remembered what life had been.
Now it was different. Today being hold and having somebody around me was the most important thing for me. I didn't need sex, being hold my Jarod, a bit cuddling was much better and more intensive. It would be wonderful to feel him inside me but could this be the most important thing in my life? Of course not.
What is important in your life Parker? It's not that you are alone anymore. You aren't innocent anymore, you are going to be a mother. You are your mother. You have to trust Jarod and what he'll do for you because you can be sure that he's the one who will always help you and never be against you. He's the only one who will be there for you till the end comes, till it is time to say goodbye. Mamma sometimes I would wish that you could be here and help me, talk to Jarod. I really love him but how to say? I can't tell him just these words and wait for a responds to hope that it might be the one I am waiting for. Give me a hint or better tell him what I feel. Feel free to tell him everything but do it!
So Mary I think it's late now, time to go to bed. said Nanna.
I had finished my hot chocolate and not listened to Jarod and my mum's Nanny during the last couple of minutes.
Yes I am tired. The flight was long. I said and stood up. I went around the table and gave her a good night kiss on her cheek, like it would be a ceremonial, like I would be a small child. Jarod just shook hands with her and went up the stairs behind me.
**********
It as your first night in Dublin, together as a married couple in a double bed. I was nervous about what could happen this night.
Wanna go into the bathroom first Jarod? I asked him. He headed without a word into and let the door open. I wouldn't resist to watch him, getting out of the dark blue shirt and the black trousers, not jeans, trousers. They fit him better than the jeans, especially his ass was perfect in them. Like a Greek god.
Just go in, grab him and make love to him ... and than he would leave you and hate you for the rest of your life.
He was standing there just in brief black silk boxer shorts brushing his teeth. It looked like out from an old German Saga, perfect. All the muscles and the hairs on his chest. Ah I could jump on him and take him where he was right now. You don't want to fuck him Mary, you want that he makes love * to * you!
I was standing there and telling myself that I should get into a nightgown or pyjamas myself. I grabbed the silky one I had worn the last night in Canada and start to strip right in the room. I was not able to look if he was standing in the door watching me or not. If he would do it, I hope that he would get something into his mind without being told what to do next. Or that he get aroused, it would be enough for right now.
I only needed a confirmation for myself having a little sex appeal left, just a little. Now I stepped out of my panties and unhooked my black lace bra. My nipples got very sensual during the last days the lace made them red and hurt. Was it not a bit too early for that?
