Author's note: don't judge me for these songs I was listening to . it was a bit Dolly Parton (yeah also known in Europe) and maybe a bit Celine Dion . but main things are out of a story I read in the last "Glamour" a German magazine. . okay also a bit of "Divas live" Author: Mary Eve Parker Feedback .. welcome always and forever - mary_eve_parker@yahoo.com General note: Parts 1-17 can be found at: http://missparkerjarod.hollywood.com/pretender_general_stories.html Rating: a bit of everything * eg * . okay . NC17 *************** CHAPTER 18 - A new Life *************** Two weeks had passed since Jarod was shot and he was till not fine. He didn't want to show me the pain it caused him when I touched him, accidentally at night, but I could see it in his face. Nevertheless we had to get the baby, Julian, baptized. And so we did. One Sunday afternoon we went with Nanna to St. Patrick Cathedral. The priest was very nice, asked us a lot about the baby and he noticed that I was big, but he didn't say a word. I couldn't stay a priest asking me a question about my physical conditions The priest called O'Donnell, baptized the baby in a small ceremonial and gave him his name Julian Tristan . A name I always wanted to name one of my children but I hadn't ever spend a thought on kids till this accident. But now everything deals with it. On the way back from Church Jarod looked into such a child cloth shop and feel in love with a couple of pink things, till I told him that there is no chance to bring something pink into my house. Nanna and I laughed. I really hate pink, since I was little. ***** ***** And you swear Nanna that you will come soon to see me there on the landscape? Yes Mary I will come as soon as possible but now you have firstly to take care of you and Jarod and Julian. They are more important than I am , they should be. .. don't cry Mary you are a big girl and big girls don't cry! I am a small girl into a big girls body! I said between sobbing. I can't leave you Nanna, not yet! I really need you . You don't need me Mary, you are old enough to take care of your own and Jarod is there too! Yes I forgot .. my big baby boy. I said and grinned into his direction. I have something for you . it's a book your mum once sent me from the states . a book of her favorite writer .. Walt Whitman. Mum liked Whitman? I couldn't believe it. Yeah Mary, Whitman and Paterson . they are so different but she loved them with all her heart. Paterson? An Australian poet. I think I have the other book in the attic . I will bring it with me when I come to visit you! She was fantastic. She handed me the old dark blue covered book, on which in big golden letters the title was "Leaves of Grass" on it. And when I opened it I found a bookmark at page 44. Don't read it now Mary, let Jarod read it out for you when you arrived at the new house. she looked at Jarod's. Will you boy? I will Nanna, sure I will. he said and let his hand glide over my back. I kissed her goodbye, took Julian from her arm and headed to the car. Jarod told me that he wanted to drive as long as possible because he would know the way exactly. It didn't bother me because I had to take care of Julian- we hadn't bought a child seat for the car yet. I looked back, tears in my eyes, to see Nanna crying too. It seems to be so final that we wouldn't meet never again. Was it final? Just a feeling deep inside me? My pregnancy went on fine. I gained more weight than I wanted to, but because of the fact that I never got to the doc yet, I didn't really know if anything is fine but I felt fine so why shouldn't the kids not be fine? But I felt well and Jarod told me that as long as I feel well, they would be fine too. Julian was sleeping my arm under my coat. Jarod slowly turned the radio on. I had never done it before. I looked at him, wanting to ask him why he wanted to listen to music, it was unusual for him. But he just let his fingers brush over my right inner tight and grinned at me. I started to relax, we were just outside of Dublin on the motorway, not American motorway, hell no not that fine. Nanna told me that we'll be about 5 hours in the car, to cross half the country. If you want my love You've only got to take it And if you get my heart Do anything but break it Bonnie Tyler was singing one of her most amazing songs. When I was a little younger I loved her songs, her voice and every title she tried to sing. Amazing. And this one was something special to me. I looked at Jarod, he was driving - in thoughts. What would I do, boy, if you would just take me. I know you'd not break my heart, you've never tried to hurt me at all.

And if you wanna know the truth

I think about you only

And whatever I'm doin'

You're never out of my mind How true. Also in my dreams, you are always there, next to me, holding me, kissing me and sometimes if my imagination is very good, I let your fingers slowly rub down my belly, your lips fixed on my breasts .. your fingers crushing into my curls ...



Oh I believe in your sweet love

Oh I believe in your sweet love



There's a way you've got

Something in the mixture

As the night goes on

You could become a fixture You are my fixture Jarod. I couldn't life without you. Not one day, not an hour at all.



Oh I believe in your sweet love

Oh I believe in your sweet love



Oh I, I ,I believe

Oh I, I, I believe She finished her singings and I drifted into a light sleep, a dreamless sleep. ***** ***** I noticed that the car was stopping. What happened? Where we there? Was I sleeping all the time? Slowly I opened my eyes and noticed that we parked in front of a lovely country house, not US style of course. I looked into my arms and noticed that Julian wasn't there anymore, Jarod next to me away too. In fear about both I jumped out of the car and headed to the house. One window was lightened. It was very cold and it seems like it had snowed the last couple of days all day through. Jarod? I asked softly Here are we. Come in Parker. he said and I got out of my wet shoes, out them next to his and headed to the lightened room. Jarod was sitting there on the floor with a lot of cushions and some quilts, the baby next to him. With a big smile I went to him, hand on my belly. Hungry. As good as possible in this tight jeans I got down to Jarod, to sit or lean next to him, near the fire which heated the room. I wanted to have a look at the wound. Stop that Parker, I am really fine. He got up, took Julian and brought him away. I got up and headed after him.

Oh my goodness. was the only thing I could think of. Jarod stood in the middle of a wooden baby room. Each part of the furniture was out of light brown wood, just the walls were soft blue. He laid him down into his crib and went back to the door were I was standing - still a bit amazed. I love you Jarod, do you know that? No, show me! Holy god, did he said that? He leaned into me, his left hand resting on my belly and the right on my side, his thumb making small circles on my breasts. I couldn't resist to moan softly, when his lips touched mine, and his tongue locked mine to him. I don't know how long we were standing there, kissing and softly touching each other. Suddenly he broke up and looked at me. Go and get into something more comfortable. I will go and get the book out of the car. There is a robe in the bath room. Thanks Jarod. Where is the bathroom? I chuckled. Ours is upstairs, the second door on the left side. How many do we have? More than one. he joked and I let my hand harshly wander down to the bulge in his jeans and squeeze him a bit. Stop that Mary .. we have 4 .. okay? That's what I call an answer! He headed away and I went upstairs, only making a last having a last view on Julian. He was sleeping calmly in his new crib. I shut off the lights and went upstairs. ***** ***** When I came down in the dark red flannel robe, Jarod was still waiting for me next to the fire. You look amazing. he said and I smiled in response. I sat down. He slide behind me, taking me between his legs, let my head rest on his shirtless male, muscular chest. It felt so good, so real, amazing. It seemed like his arm didn't make any troubles at the moment. His hand rested in my breasts, softly my nipples got hard, and pressed into his palms. I closed my eyes and he lifted the book from next to him. Your mum had an exquisite taste in literature. He said and opened the book. I let my eyes closed, just wanted to hear his male voice and smell his own scent. This one is where the bookmark was in Mary. ...

You sea! I resign myself to you also . I guess what you mean, I behold from the beach your crooked inviting fingers, I believe you refuse to go back without feeling me; We must have a turn together . I undress . hurry me out of sight of the land Holy god, his one hand played with the robe, letting it clef open a bit, only to see my breasts and the beginning of my belly. Touch me Jarod while I listen to your words. Cushion me soft . rock me in billowy drowse, Dash me with amorous wet . I can repay you. I am wet, just waiting for you Like it? He asked me and I just nodded in response. Sea of stretched ground swells! Sea breathing broad and convulsive breaths! Sea of the brine scooper of storms! Capricious and dainty sea! I am integral with you . I too am of one phase and of all phases He stopped. Continue I begged. I thought you drifted to sleep. No I am just listening and imaginating the pics you present me. Partaker of influx and efflux . extoller of hate and conciliation, Extoller of amies and those that sleep in each others' arms I am he attesting sympathy; Shall I make my list of things in the house and skip the house that supports them? Jarod's hand was now on my breast, playing with my sensitive skin, bringing me to moan and bug my breast into his palm. Slowly I felt his lips on my neck, on the sensitive spot behind me ear. I sucked it and I thought that I would be dreaming. I felt his hard phallus pressing against my back and I slowly moved up to feel him a bit better and give him a better success to do what ever he wants to do with me. He undid my robe and let it glide down my shoulders. It had been him who started this game, so I was willing - for days now - to give him whatever he wants. His one hand caressed my belly, not telling me or letting me notice how big I was. I turned around to face him, to see all this lust in his dark brown eyes. This was the night, tonight . maybe . hopefully. We started kissing, softly in the beginning but suddenly I started to suck his lip into my mouth, and up from that moment, every barrier was broken. We laid down, next to each other. The fire lightened the room romantically. I was laid down on cushions and soft things, not to ache my back. His hand were firmly on my breast, kneading it harshly. I moaned load. You don't know how long I wanted to touch you like this Mary? No .. just show me now. I said half unconscious of arousal of his sweet torture. And he did. His lips left mine and wandered down over my breasts, slowly down to my huge belly, licking my belly button, giving kissed all over it. Slowly he parted my legs, to get the success I had wanted to nearly 3 months. And he did what I had dreamed of with his tongue, torturing me, teasing me and finally bringing me to the edge and letting me down softly. I moaned his name, screamed it a couple of times before his fingers left me and I started to control my breath again. It was an hard exercise if somebody you really love was liking you till you thought you have to die at the next stroke of his fingers. He looked at me. I laid there breathless, my hands on my breaths to comfort their new weight a bit. He had noticed this change and paid special attention to them, but this wasn't enough for the moment. He moved next to me and started to such like a baby. Suddenly he broke and looked at me. You are leaking honey he said giggling and indeed something like milk was on his lips. But he didn't care. He got down again and sucked more and more out of me. Honestly, it felt amazing. Jarod was my little baby boy, like I always say. My hand wandered down his brief boxers. His erection was huge, like many years ago, and I started to free it with just one hand. He gasped when I got it out and let my fingers slowly glide over the 8 and a half inches of hard flesh. It didn't took long till I was on all my fours and he got into me. Hell it hurt in the beginning but after the first slow trust it stopped hurting or pleasure started, however you want to take it. I hadn't had sex during my last pregnancy, but this was feeling more than good this time. Sure positions were limited but who cares. He loves me - I told myself - and that's the most important thing. I haven't pushed him into anything. After a couple of harder strokes I felt my walls tighten and him over me, resting his warm big hands on my buttocks, getting faster and faster. And I came, like I've never come before. This whole sex was different from the one I had before. After he pulled out, I got down. My arms hurt from carrying most of my weight. I laid down, Jarod next to me, kissing me softly. You can't imagine Mary how long I wanted to be inside you . how long I wanted to hear you screaming my name. It felt so right Mary, so wonderful right. I know Jarod. I drifted into deep sleep, being hold, tight in Jarod arms, just a quilt around us. ***** ***** Next Midday Mary speaking. Hey Mary the other speaker said. Who are you? I asked. Debbie. Hey Debbie how are you doing? How did you get this number? Oh Jarod gave it to Daddy and he told me that if I would want I could call you. It's wonderful to hear your voice. I tear escaped my eye. How are you doing Deb? Fine Mary. And you? Syd said that you are pregnant. He did? Well yeah I am pregnant - from head to toe. That bad? she asked softly. No, its wonderful . if the Centre wouldn't be behind us. I know they are. I am really sorry that you have to run. I think we can stay here at least till the babies are born. Babies? Didn't Syd told you? . Honey we get triplets. Holy Shit ... sorry Ms. Parker I didn't mean to . It's okay .. I reacted the same way when .. ________________________TBC__________________________ note: the lyrics are from Bonnie Tyler note 2: the Walt Whitman poem: song of myself Nr. 22