yes! It is I, your faithful *people stare* well, maybe not-so-faithful fic writer! I try! I really do! ^___^ aww, i can't be all sad n stuff right now! I HAVE DA POWER OF DA DIGITAL CAMERAA!! MUAHAHAHA... ha... haa? oh... sorry.. ^_^ that means, for any of you that care, that I can now put my *hand drawn* pictures on the comp! i'm a MUCH better drawer IRL than on da compie wif da mouse... why don't they invent something like they have for the palm pilot so you can just draw on the screen and have it transferred into your paint program or whatever? foo.. anyway, this means that pictures of:
(a) Older Zim (b) Older Dib (c) Older Gaz (d) Older Gir (e) Various fic scenes (f) all of the above
Will be available. If you chose f, GOOD FOR YOU! You get a cookie for being right! ^_^ ooh... i'm way too hyper... mehehehe... but that's a GOOD thing! Also, I want to say I LOVE YOU MORPHEUS because now i have Zim eppies i've missed right here on my own comp! which means I can pause at cool scenes! which means I can practice drawing Zim/Gir/Dib/Gaz! Which means my pictures won't horribly suck! ...or at least not as bad as they would... hm.. ON WITH DA FIC!
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"MASTERRR! You need a huug!" Gir screeched as soon as Zim set foot inside.

"No! Gir! I'm all yucky and ketchupy and ricey!" Zim yelled, but Gir didn't care. He tackled Zim and tried to squish his squeedily spooch. Well, that's how it felt anyway. "Auugh! Giir! Get ooofff!" Zim said, gasping for air. Gir detached himself and sniffed interestedly at Zim's clothes.

"Ooooh, ketchuuup!" Gir said, grinning at him. "Can I eat your clothes?"

Zim gave him an odd look. "No you can not! I must go and be cleansed of this filthy... filthyness! I would say that I hate their stupid human ketchup n rice day, but it was actually kind of fun for once..."

"Oooh! FUN! What happened whathappened whathappenedwhathappened??" Gir said, running in circles around Zim's legs.

"The Dib-human started a food fight," Zim said, laughing as he remembered. "I got to paste the principal, it was fun! For a filthy human stink beast, Dib's got some good ideas every once in a while." Zim thought on that for a minute. "Once in a loooong while," he added.

"Dib's fuun! He gives me cupcakes when I talk to him!" Gir said, grinning.

"You WHAT?!" Zim yelled; what if Gir had been slipping him information on his base, or his people?!

"He gives me cupcakes and asks me questions, and I talk to him about the Scary Monkey Show and brainfreezies and tacos and..." Gir said, rambling on and on about his favorite subjects. Zim let out a sigh of relief; Gir hadn't let anything important slip.

"Yes, yes, that's very good Gir.. I'm going to the cleansing room to get this filthy ketchup n rice off of me," Zim interrupted, and went through the portal beneath the little desk thing in the corner.

"OKAY!" Gir said, starting to roll on the floor a bit. His antenna let out a little beep. "OOH! The Scary Monkey Show is coming on!" he yelled, running to the TV.

*******

Zim jumped out of the cleansing chamber, his clothes all wet and soggy. He grinned at the wet clothes. "Ahh, the stink of clean," Zim said, sniffing appreciatively. "No more filthy ketchup and rice yuck on ZIM'S clothing.. Lemony fresh victory is miine!" He threw the wet clothes in the drying chamber, and changed into some dry clothes. He studied himself in the mirror for a minute. Due to necessity, he had had to stop wearing his Invader uniform; it was too small for him, and some of the kids had started asking if it was a dress. Apparently it was un-human for males to wear dresses. Zim wasn't really a male, though; they didn't really have gender distinctions on Irk unless you'd already hit the Change. Zim frowned at the mirror then; what would happen when HE hit the Change? He certainly didn't hope he would go female, but that was always a risk... A /small/ risk, but a risk nonetheless. That was another thing, though... There weren't any Irken on this planet... He pushed that thought aside, and figured that when the change came, it would come, and that bridge would be crossed then and not a moment before.

A loud crashing noise sounded from above, and Zim mentally groaned. "Better go see what Gir's destroyed now," Zim grumbled, heading for the lifting shaft.

"EEEEEE! MONKEEYY!" Gir was hollering, tears in his greenish eyes. "Why, Monkey, whyy? I love-ded yoouu! I love-ded yooou!" He was sitting next to the remains of lamp he'd smashed in surprise.

"Gir!! What's the problem n... My Tallest!" Zim yelped, noticing why 'Monkey' was gone. He bowed slightly. "My Tallest, it is an honor to-"

"Save it, Zim," Red interrupted. "Purple and me have been thinking for a while, and we've decided that it's time to tell you the truth."

"The... truth?" Zim asked, confused. What truth?

"We sent you to Earth to get RID of you, Zim," Purple said, looking at Red. "We're fed up with all these reports on how you're going to take over Earth sometime soon, and it's been a number of years since then." Red nodded.

"We don't want to hear from you anymore, Zim. You are, as of now, officially banished to Earth. Your mission is annulled, heck, it wasn't even a real mission to start with," Red said, shrugging.

"By the way, you can't quit being banished this time. If you DO come back, we'll just kill you, kay?" Purple said, smiling at Zim. SMILING. Zim couldn't believe it.

"But... but... YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME! INVADER BLOOD RUNS THROUGH MY VEINS! YOU CANNOT DENY MY VEINS!" Zim screeched, staring at the Tallests in disbelief.

"Oh, I think we can. In fact, we are," Red commented, and the screen blinked black before returning to the Scary Monkey Show. Gir didn't seem to notice, though, he was staring at his master unhappily. Even his messed up little brain could comprehend that something bad had happened.

"Masterr?" he asked tentatively.

Zim stared blankly at the screen. "All for nothing... nothiingg... They hated me, Gir, they hated me... They sent me here to get rid of me..." he said numbly. Hatred and anger, and a whole lot of unhappiness boiled up inside him. "I'LL GET THEM! I'LL GET THHEEEMM! THEY CANNOT DO THIS TO ZIIIM!" he screamed, then fled the house, running as fast as he could, trying to escape the horrible truth... "Truth," he hissed angrily. "Truth, they said. I'll show them... Truth indeed! I'LL give them truth! It is TRUE that I WILL COME BACK, and I WILL destroyy theemmm!" Hot tears blinded his eyes, he was just thankful he'd left his wig on when he cleansed himself. It was still in place, but he'd left his contacts at home. "So what if the humans see me? I don't care, I DON'T CAARE!" he yelled, and kept running, headed for the park.

*******

"I DON'T CAARE!" someone yelled, and Dib looked up from the newest alien catching device he was making.

"That sounded like Zim," he said, and looked out his window. Sure enough, the green-skinned alien was out running, his wig flying behind him. "Sounds like he's upset... should I go talk to him?" he mused. Zim DID look awfully unhappy, but Dib was pretty sure that an upset Zim was not one he wanted to confront alone. But.. then again... Dib shook his head confusedly, then made up his mind. "Gaz, I'm going out for a while, okay?" he called into the living room as he left.

"Don't distract me, I'm on the fourteenth level," Gaz grumbled.

"So? You've already beaten the game forty times," Dib commented, and shut the door.

"GRR! You messed me up! I'm gonna hafta DOOM YOU now!" Gaz yelled, and debated going after him that second. "Naah, I'll just wait for him to come back. First, I'll have some pizza," she decided, picking up the phone.

Dib ran, trying not to lose sight of Zim. He was catching up a little, mostly because every now and then Zim would half-stumble, like he couldn't really see where he was going. He entered the park, and literally seemed to disappear. Dib ran in, too, and looked around. "There!" he said to himself, pointing at a large rock. He could just see the edge of one of Zim's boots poking out. He crept up behind the rock, and sat down to see if he could find out what was wrong.

"Not real, not real, no hope.. I'll never make it back to Irk, never... They'll send the Armada after me, they will, and then I'll just be space dust.. It's death then or now, no real point to live, no real point, might as well go now rather than then..." Zim was mumbling, and it sounded suspiciously like he was crying, or had been recently. Dib stood up, and went around the rock to meet the biggest surprise of his life.

"Zim??" he asked, staring at him. Startled, the green one dropped the laser he'd been about to fire. It had been pointed at himself.

"Oh, it's you," he grumbled, glaring up at him. His crimson eyes were even redder; Dib supposed crying had bad effects on him just like water did. Funny, he'd never noticed just how... beautiful... his eyes were... He flushed at the thought, and tried to ignore it. "What do YOU want? To torment me some more? Maybe you'd like to be the one to pull the trigger, how about that?" Zim asked, holding the laser gun out to Dib. Hands shaking, he took it, remembering the scene from so long ago... He turned, and flung the gun away. It landed in the pond, splashing down and sinking quickly.

"No. You're better than that. What's wrong?" Dib asked, sitting down next to Zim. Something within him reached out for this unhappy alien, his only 'friend,' if he could call him that. Dib realized it was empathy; he was feeling sorry for Zim... He almost grinned at the thought of feeling sorry for an alien, but bit it back when he saw how miserable Zim really was.

"Nothing... and... everything!" Zim replied, almost starting to cry again. "Why won't you kill mee? Throw me in the pond, please, just do SOMETHING..."

"But why?" Dib persisted.

Zim started laughing. "You're fine, you know, there's no threat from me anymore... Never was, really, Earth is safe once more!" he said, laughing and crying at the same time.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Dib asked, staring at him confusedly. Zim stopped laughing, and glared at Dib coldly. He shrank back under the fierce gaze, the hatred he saw there. Yet at the same time he knew it was not directed at him.

"I never had a mission here, not a real one. My Tallests, my leaders, sent me here to get rid of me. They hated me! They used my need to prove myself against me, and sent me to this filthy backwater planet hoping I'd die or something," he hissed, staring down at his hands. They were clenched into fists, and he was shaking with anger.

"Wow... that sucks... I'm.. sorry..." Dib said, staring at the ground too. A strange noise came from Zim, almost like he was choking.

"You're... SORRY? Being SORRY won't help anything, I've been banished, again! It wasn't bad enough that I was banished the FIRST time, but now if I come back they're going to shoot me down like I was some filthy beast, not even fit to be an Invader anymore! Not bad enough that they did it when I was short, now that I'm taller they're going to shoot me down like I was nothing! NOTHING!" Zim yelled, starting to cry again. Automatically, Dib reached out for him and drew Zim into a hug, holding him loosely, mumbling comfortingly. He had done this for Gaz often when their mother had first died, and he needed to comfort Zim, to tell him it was all right, would BE all right. Slowly the alien's sobs ceased, and Dib looked down in surprise to see he had fallen asleep, leaning against Dib.

"Oh, this is fabulous," Dib said to himself, looking up at the sky. Dark, ominous clouds had started to gather, promising rain soon. He sighed; he couldn't just leave Zim here if it was going to rain. Adjusting himself so one arm was behind Zim's shoulders and the other was under his knees, he stood. Zim was surprisingly light, for being almost as tall as Dib. Looking around to see if anyone was out in the park, he saw none. The threat of heavy rain probably kept most people inside. Dib started off for his home, figuring the lawn gnomes would try to vaporize him if he went to Zim's house.

Thankful that he had seen and encountered nobody, he finally reached his house. Opening the door, he crept as quietly as he could to his room. He laid Zim on the bed, and sighed in relief that they had made it, just as raindrops started to tap against the roof. Soon the tapping got louder, and a full-fledged downpour was on. He turned towards his doorway, and was greeted by the sight of a scary-looking Gaz. Not that she didn't look scary usually, but she had the calm rage look that meant he was due for a dooming. He grinned at her nervously. "Gaz, um, yeah, sorry about messing up your game, I... hey, you want me to buy you pizza?" he asked, desperate for a way out of the dooming. He hoped she hadn't seen Zim. Gaz thought this offer over.

"Yes. You pay for the pizza, and I won't doom you as badly," she said, turning around to go downstairs. He sighed in relief; a Gaz dooming was a very painful thing and anything to lessen it was worth it. He pulled the covers up over Zim, and left a smallish mound of pillows by his head to hide him from view. He turned and went downstairs, where Gaz held out the phone. "You call, they know me by name by now, and I don't want any of their stupid comments on how pizza at every meal really is bad for you. I mean, I DO eat cereal every now and then." Dib nodded, and ordered. They enjoyed the pizza in companionable silence, and Gaz decided to drop the dooming charge. "Well, I'm going to play my game now. Why don't you go upstairs and check on Zim? He might've woken up and started destroying things by now," Gaz said, pulling out her Platinum Edition GameSlave version 7. Dib almost choked; she HAD noticed. Still, her advice was sound, and she didn't seem to care that Zim was in his room. He went upstairs, and locked the door to his room when he got in. Zim was still asleep, he noted, which meant he hadn't destroyed anything important. He was pretty thankful for that. He grabbed last month's issue of his favorite UFO magazine, and settled down on the floor to read. After a while, Zim started stirring. Dib closed his magazine and watched to make sure he didn't try to kill him or anything.

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Hope you likees! New chapter will probably come soon, like I said, tis spring break and i have lotsa time! YAAY! anyway, hope you all enjoyed it and thank you very very very much for all the comments! I wuv you all! a few individual notes:
ArmAndLeg & Cherry-Wolf: Of course there will be more! ^_^ i've made a solemn vow that from now on, any stories that I start WILL be completed... unless it's an old one i started a long time ago and i have lotsa stuff up already but i have zero interest in completing it... which is probably why i won't post my Pokemon fic... *shudder* yuck, i used to love Pokemon and now it's just kinda iffy.... o0; sorry to all you Poke-people, just doesn't interest me no more...
Lady Lina: they're sophomores, and Gaz is a freshman... or freshwoman.. freshperson? political correctness is wierd... o0;
Xelloss: heehee, was it Ketchup n Rice day there? ^_^ eww, i don't like foodfights much though... so.. much... FIILLTH.... bleeh...
Anywhoo! I hope you liked my chapter, and there will be lots more to come, like picchas n stuff! yaay and happiness! ^_~ i put a coupla quotes/almost quotes from some of the eppies i've been poking through on my comp in the Zim-Gir dialogue, can you spot them? hint: they're from the Germs episode... ^_^ peace out and write on, all!

~*~Celelorien~*~