"This don't mean that, you own me
This ain't no good, in fact it's phony as hell
But things worked out just like you wanted too
If you see me out you don't know me
Try to turn your head, try to give me some room
To figure out just what I'm going to do"
-Matchbox Twenty
Later
Buffy sighed as she finished the letter. I can't believe I'm doing this, she thought as she grabbed her bags. She sat down the bags and stepped up to the bed. She looked down at Angel who was asleep peacefully. She reached out gently touching his face. She leaned over him brushing her lips against his. "I love you," she whispered before leaving their room.
"I knew you would do this," Spike said. She jumped.
"Wear a bell," she said annoyed.
"You're just going to leave a note?" Spike asked. "Abandon him?"
"I can't stay," she said. "It doesn't feel right."
"No offense luv but it will never feel right," he told her. "You're not normal."
"I know," she said. "But I can't stay here. I can't watch them together." She sighed. "I can't live like this." Spike started to say something but she interrupted him. "Or unlive, whatever. The point is I can't go on like this."
"I'm going to tell you something luv," Spike said to her his voice gentle. "You're going to regret this moment."
She felt tears surface to her eyes. "I don't want to go I mean I like you, I even like Drusilla when she's not hanging all over Angel. But I just can't stay here and watch them, and I know that if it isn't Dru it will just be someone else." Spike sighed shaking his head.
"Where will you go?" he asked finally.
"I don't know," she told him. "I'll know when I get there." She smiled faintly. "Maybe I'll go to England." She quickly hugged him. "Goodbye Spike." Spike watched her go and sighed again leaning against the wall.
"I think you're already leaving Feels like your hand is on the door I thought this place was an empire Now I'm relaxed- I can't be sure" -Matchbox Twenty
Angel awoke with a start. "Buffy," he whispered. Every fiber in him told him that she was in danger. He searched the room until he found the note.
Dear Angel,
If you're receiving this then my courage didn't fail me and I left. I'm sorry but I couldn't stay and go through all of that over and over again. I couldn't continue to wake up alone and know that you were with her.
Please don't try to find me. I know that we'll probably meet again but for now I need to be alone to figure things out.
Love always, Buffy
"No," he whispered. He threw on some clothes and ran into Spike and Dru's room. Dru was the only one there.
"Angel," she said surprised.
"Where's Spike?" he asked.
"My Spike-y's gone," she told him.
"What do you mean by gone?" Angel asked.
"He left," she said. "So did the slayer."
"Where?" Angel demanded. Drusilla looked at him hurt. "Dru, I'm sorry but she- they might be in trouble. Tell me."
"Spike-y's not in trouble," Dru told him confidently.
"What about Buffy?"
"She's not far, but I can't see her."
Angel looked at her. "Is she hurt? Please Dru tell me."
"I don't know." She closed her eyes. "Go east." He ran out of the room and in the direction that she had told him. He found her fighting a group of vampires. He went to her and began to help.
"Angel?" she asked as she staked one.
"Boy does this feel like old times," he observed wryly. "What'd you do to piss them off."
"They're Lyle's men," she told him. "I exist, that's enough." They made quick work of the inexperienced vampires. Then they turned to each other.
"Are you okay?" he asked.
"I think."
"Good. Now, tell me something."
"What?"
"What in the hell were you thinking?!"
She sighed. "I wasn't. I wasn't thinking."
He glanced down at her bag. "You were really going to leave me weren't you?"
Again she sighed looking miserable. "I don't know. Maybe."
"Why?"
"Angel do you ever think?" His eyes narrowed at her words but he waited for her to continue. "I love you. I'm not going to sit around watching you with her."
He didn't respond for a second then he grinned. "You're more than welcome to join us."
"Ewwe. So not going to happen."
"Don't knock it `till you try it."
"What part of ewwe don't you understand?"
He laughed. "Okay, I'll try to stay away from her in the physical sense. If I do that will you come home?"
"Yes."
"You're lucky that I like you so much," Angel told her picking up her bag and slipping an arm around her shoulders.
"Whatever," Buffy said with a shrug. He growled softly. "Fine, yes Angel I'm so lucky." This last part was said with complete sarcasm.
"Shh," he whispered. "I heard a scream and. smell."
She took in an unneeded breath. "Blood, human blood." Before Angel could do anything she took off running. He sighed and ran after her still carrying her bag.
Later
Buffy sighed as she finished the letter. I can't believe I'm doing this, she thought as she grabbed her bags. She sat down the bags and stepped up to the bed. She looked down at Angel who was asleep peacefully. She reached out gently touching his face. She leaned over him brushing her lips against his. "I love you," she whispered before leaving their room.
"I knew you would do this," Spike said. She jumped.
"Wear a bell," she said annoyed.
"You're just going to leave a note?" Spike asked. "Abandon him?"
"I can't stay," she said. "It doesn't feel right."
"No offense luv but it will never feel right," he told her. "You're not normal."
"I know," she said. "But I can't stay here. I can't watch them together." She sighed. "I can't live like this." Spike started to say something but she interrupted him. "Or unlive, whatever. The point is I can't go on like this."
"I'm going to tell you something luv," Spike said to her his voice gentle. "You're going to regret this moment."
She felt tears surface to her eyes. "I don't want to go I mean I like you, I even like Drusilla when she's not hanging all over Angel. But I just can't stay here and watch them, and I know that if it isn't Dru it will just be someone else." Spike sighed shaking his head.
"Where will you go?" he asked finally.
"I don't know," she told him. "I'll know when I get there." She smiled faintly. "Maybe I'll go to England." She quickly hugged him. "Goodbye Spike." Spike watched her go and sighed again leaning against the wall.
"I think you're already leaving Feels like your hand is on the door I thought this place was an empire Now I'm relaxed- I can't be sure" -Matchbox Twenty
Angel awoke with a start. "Buffy," he whispered. Every fiber in him told him that she was in danger. He searched the room until he found the note.
Dear Angel,
If you're receiving this then my courage didn't fail me and I left. I'm sorry but I couldn't stay and go through all of that over and over again. I couldn't continue to wake up alone and know that you were with her.
Please don't try to find me. I know that we'll probably meet again but for now I need to be alone to figure things out.
Love always, Buffy
"No," he whispered. He threw on some clothes and ran into Spike and Dru's room. Dru was the only one there.
"Angel," she said surprised.
"Where's Spike?" he asked.
"My Spike-y's gone," she told him.
"What do you mean by gone?" Angel asked.
"He left," she said. "So did the slayer."
"Where?" Angel demanded. Drusilla looked at him hurt. "Dru, I'm sorry but she- they might be in trouble. Tell me."
"Spike-y's not in trouble," Dru told him confidently.
"What about Buffy?"
"She's not far, but I can't see her."
Angel looked at her. "Is she hurt? Please Dru tell me."
"I don't know." She closed her eyes. "Go east." He ran out of the room and in the direction that she had told him. He found her fighting a group of vampires. He went to her and began to help.
"Angel?" she asked as she staked one.
"Boy does this feel like old times," he observed wryly. "What'd you do to piss them off."
"They're Lyle's men," she told him. "I exist, that's enough." They made quick work of the inexperienced vampires. Then they turned to each other.
"Are you okay?" he asked.
"I think."
"Good. Now, tell me something."
"What?"
"What in the hell were you thinking?!"
She sighed. "I wasn't. I wasn't thinking."
He glanced down at her bag. "You were really going to leave me weren't you?"
Again she sighed looking miserable. "I don't know. Maybe."
"Why?"
"Angel do you ever think?" His eyes narrowed at her words but he waited for her to continue. "I love you. I'm not going to sit around watching you with her."
He didn't respond for a second then he grinned. "You're more than welcome to join us."
"Ewwe. So not going to happen."
"Don't knock it `till you try it."
"What part of ewwe don't you understand?"
He laughed. "Okay, I'll try to stay away from her in the physical sense. If I do that will you come home?"
"Yes."
"You're lucky that I like you so much," Angel told her picking up her bag and slipping an arm around her shoulders.
"Whatever," Buffy said with a shrug. He growled softly. "Fine, yes Angel I'm so lucky." This last part was said with complete sarcasm.
"Shh," he whispered. "I heard a scream and. smell."
She took in an unneeded breath. "Blood, human blood." Before Angel could do anything she took off running. He sighed and ran after her still carrying her bag.
