A/N: Shoes Shoes Shoes! I just realized how many shoe stories people have suggested! So, this chapter will be dedicated completely to shoes! **grin** Now for the credits: The follwing stories have been suggested by:
The Red Shoes - Violet Dawson, Harriet
The Little Old Woman Who Lived In A Shoe - The Plutonian Cow
The Elves and the Shoemaker - peakechick
Gulliver's Travels - Harriet
Okay, now we can start. This aught-a be interesting...

Fairytale Invasions!
Chapter 11: Shoes Shoes Shoes!

Aragorn, Legolas, and Gimli sat down on the grass, catching their breath.
"We're never going to catch the Orcs, I saw let the Hobbits get eaten," Gimli panted.
"Gimli!" the others chorused reprovingly.
"I was just kidding," he mumbled.
"What is that?" Legolas asked, pointing towards the setting sun.
"It's called the sun," Gimli replied, lying back on the grass.
If looks could kill, Legolas murdered Gimli that moment. "I know that," the Elf growled, "I want to know what the thing in front of the sun is!"
Gimli sat up and peered at the sun, ignoring Legolas' cold looks. "What do you think, Aragorn?" Gimli asked.
"It looks like a giant shoe," Aragorn answered, puzzled. "Come, let us investigate."
The trio trotted over the plains to what was indeed a giant shoe. Shouts, squeals, and crashes could be heard from inside. "Not again," Gimli murmured under his breath.
Taking a deep breath, Aragorn knocked on the door. It opened and an old woman appeared.
"Yes?" she asked with a forced smile.
"Excuse us ma'am, but we are on the trail of some Orcs and we wondered if you had some food you could share with us," Aragorn said as charmingly as he could.
The old woman fixed him with a cold stare. "There are thirteen children in here, and more keep coming! Now, do you think I have food to share?" The trio tried to answer, but she interrupted. "No, I don't! Now go away!" With that she abruptly closed the door in their faces.
"Odd, I thought old people were supposed to be nice," Legolas said, confused.
"You obviously never met my mother," Gimli muttered under his breath.
"Come on, let's keep going," Aragorn said, walking rather quickly away from the shoe.
A few miles on, they came upon a small cottage. They began to argue over whether or not to knock, when the door opened a girl danced out. She had on bright red shoes and was dancing wonderfully, but she wore a horrified expression.
"Make it stop!" she shrieked. "Make it stop!"
Before they could ask her what was wrong, she had danced out of sight. As the trio stood staring after her, a man appeared in the door.
"Can I help you sirs?" he asked politely.
"What on Arda was that?" Gimli exclaimed before the others could stop him.
"Oh, that was my daughter," the man said nonchalantly. "I told her not to wear those shoes to church," he added with a shake of his head. "Now, what can I do for you?"
"Do you have any food to spare?" Aragorn asked hesitantly.
"Oh yes! Ever since the Elves came I've had plenty to spare," he said, motioning them inside.
Legolas raised an eyebrow. "Elves?"
The man nodded, ushering Legolas through the door. "I'm a shoemaker, but the business was going poorly and my daughter and I were on the verge of starvation. Then one night the Elves came and started making the shoes for me. They were a hit! In two weeks I had more than I would ever need, so I relaxed. Of course then the Elves formed a union and demanded pay, etc., etc., but I figured with all the money they generated it would be no problem, they're good workers-" His incredibly long explanation was cut short as he walked into Legolas, who had stopped dead in his tracks. "What's wrong?" the shoemaker asked, rubbing his nose as he stepped around Legolas.
Legolas did not reply, but stood opened mouthed. Little sprite-like creatures were running about cutting leather, sewing, and various other shoe-making activities.
"Please," Legolas said softly, closing his eyes, "please tell me those are not the Elves."
"Yea, they are," the man replied, confused. "What's wrong with them?"
Legolas clenched his fists. "I told you not to tell me that!" he snapped. Snatching his bow, he fired an arrow and pinned one of the creatures to the wall by its collar.
"Hey!" it squeaked. "That was uncalled for!"
Ignoring it, Legolas recovered his arrow and picked up the squirming creature. "This," he said, giving the creature a vigorous shake, "is NOT an Elf! I am an Elf, this, this thing, is a sprite or some-such creature! It is not an Elf!" Having finished his speech, Legolas flicked the little creature aside.
The other creatures gasped in horror. "He hurt Joe!" they squeaked. "Get him!"
Aragorn and Gimli fell over laughing as the little creatures threw ropes, trying to tie up Legolas. Legolas did not respond right away due to shock, but when he did start moving, there were already a good amount of ropes on him and he was having a bit of trouble getting free. Gimli watched amused for a moment longer, then hefted his axe and cut the Elf loose. There was a chorus of tiny shouts of indignation, but they were generally ignored.
"Um, thanks," Legolas said warily. Gimli shrugged and walked back to the door. Seizing this opportunity of confusion, Aragorn stepped up to the shoe-maker and shook his hand quickly.
"Well, thank you, you have been a wonderful host, but we must be leaving. Farewell!" The ranger turned and sprinted out the door, followed closely by Gimli and Legolas.
When they were a safe distance from the house, they paused to catch their breath. "All in favor of hunting the Orcs with out stopping?" Gimli asked. The others raised their hands, and they quickly set out along the Orcs trail, trying very hard not to think of shoes.


**puts out plate of cookies** Review time! =o) It was weird I know, but so were the stories it came from! Don't forget to suggest some fairytales! =o) Thanks for reading! =o)