Notes: Sorry it took a while! Slight lemon warning for A/L. I promise more Gimli and Frodo interaction in the next chapter! Only the unknown characters are mine! The rest are not!
Understanding
Part 16.
Somewhere in the waking world, something soft tickled his nose. He yawned and stretched out a scarred hand to idly brush away the irritant, fully intending to turn over and pull his hood over his face Who knew sunlight, even the tiny glimmer of sunlight that fell on his lowered eyelids, would be so irritating? However, when his right arm *didn't* bang against the hard, cold forest floor in the attempt, he came fully awake. Meiyuu looked about him groggily. Where in the name of whatever gods were listening…
He could think of several things wrong, offhand. He was in a room. With huge, beautifully arched, fine *glass* windows. He knew he didn't know much about economy and prices, but glass windows were expensive. Very expensive. And there were shimmering, exquisite tapestries covering the walls, complete with woven depictions of cool, lush trees, powerful wizards, and fair Elves. And that wasn't all. Thin lines replaced the ugly gashes on his hands… he had no hood… He suddenly noticed something that unsettled him more than anything else. *What* was he doing in a bed? A nice, soft feather bed? With a silken coverlet? And was that expensive *satin* under his head? The events of the past few days slowly stirred in his mind. Oh yes. He remembered. This was…Aragorn's old room.
He snickered, thinking of the strong, capable man sleeping in a feather bed with a silk-covered blanket and satin-covered pillow. Then he frowned. It still didn't explain what he was doing in a bed. Beds were too…comfortable for his taste. He'd gotten used to hardness of the bare ground, having slept on it for as long as he could remember. It was reassuring, in a way. It symbolized his life and probably the remainder of that life. It reminded him not to get presumptuous and actually think that he would ever have many friends. Silly thought, that.
Meiyuu knew he would only have one friend, if any. And Legolas will be leaving me soon, he reminded himself. He has Aragorn now. Why would he need me? Why indeed? It wasn't as if he had ever done anything to make himself liked by any of his traveling companions. It wasn't as if he hadn't been a nuisance, constantly humiliating Legolas with his childish stubbornness… And besides Legolas, what other friend did he have? Could he have? Aragorn? He remembered the apple incident, as he now thought of it, and winced. He had gotten on the man's nerves from the very beginning. Gimli? He scoffed. The reticent dwarf didn't seem to know he existed, much less feel friendship for him. Frodo? He dismissed the notion. The little Hobbit was warm and friendly. Meiyuu was the exact opposite. They'd never fit as friends. And who else was there? The Elven lord Elrond? Elrond's sons? He snorted, remembering the vases he had inadvertently smashed the day before (and vowing to fix them with his power). Like that would happen. And he didn't want it to happen, he reminded himself. Shira was after him! He couldn't risk anyone else's safety for a few moments of feeling wanted. Meiyuu hastily climbed out of the bed and quietly left the room. It wouldn't do to be noisy, because then he really would be just a nuisance. It was still early in the morning, and no doubt everyone was still sleeping. He absently scratched at his hands and looked for the bathing room he had used earlier.
Instead, Meiyuu discovered a library. Numerous books neatly filled the many bookshelves and bookcases all around the room. He had never seen so many books in his life! If only he knew how to read… He had known how to read, once, but now… Well, that was over with. It was another time, another place. He couldn't remember it, the potion Shira had forced on him long ago had taken care of that, but he knew it was a kinder, a nicer time. A time long gone and dead. He sighed. He'd forgotten how to do so many things, reading being only one of them. How he yearned to have that back…
He went over to a bookshelf and touched a book gingerly, forgetting for a few moments that he was no longer covered in dirt. Meiyuu carefully picked up the book and flipped through it; it was written in Elvish. He smirked. Even if he had remembered how to read, he still would not be able to read the book. Someone cleared their throat behind him. Meiyuu jumped in surprise, dropping the book. He caught it mentally, and the emerald-green book hovered above the ground.
Elrond raised an eyebrow slightly. "I did not mean to frighten you so, young one." His focus stayed on the floating book.
Meiyuu grabbed the book and slid it back onto the shelf, where it belonged. "Y-you didn't frighten me," he stammered.
"Ah… Then I must have been mistaken," Elrond said impassively, hiding a smile. "Could you not sleep?"
"I… No," Meiyuu admitted. "Did I wake you?" His gaze drifted again to the garnet ring. Truth be told, the youth could not figure out what it was that caught his attention. It was as if the ring had a strange power in it.
Elrond noticed the boy's preoccupation with Vilya. "No, you did not wake me, child. I was restless myself. Do you like my ring?"
Meiyuu tore his gaze away. "I dunno…" He bit his lip and hesitated, not wanting to sound stupid. He had the feeling the Elven lord would think him ridiculous if he continued. The thought alone aroused a contrary feeling in him, a stubbornness that condemned his cowardice and forced him to speak. "It… it's different. It looks normal but…it's not." He wrinkled his brow as he struggled to say what he meant.
Elrond raised a surprised eyebrow. "You're right, Meiyuu. My ring is different," he replied. Though how had the child known that, he wondered/
"Oh…" Meiyuu didn't know what to say.
Elrond abruptly decided to change the subject. "How did you catch the book like that?"
Meiyuu's face closed off instantly. To Elrond, it seemed as if the boy had withdrawn behind a thick, high wall of distrust. It was probably, the Elven lord reflected, a habit ingrained from necessity. After all, hadn't Estel told him their enemies sought possession of Meiyuu for exploitation of his powers? Even with this knowledge in mind, Elrond felt surprised to feel a slight twinge of disappointment in his heart. Logically, he knew he had done nothing to truly merit trust from the boy, but it still hurt to see the blatant, if subconscious, suspicion in Meiyuu's eyes.
"Catch it like what?" the child asked innocently. Feigned ignorance didn't appeal to Elrond either.
"Don't lie, Meiyuu, for I can see right through lies, and I don't appreciate being lied to," Elrond sternly told the boy. He felt extremely satisfied to see a twinge of guilt stain the child's face.
"Sorry… It's just…" Meiyuu averted his gaze and shuffled his feet. "I've always been able to do that…"
Elrond felt his heart warm to the child and decided to take pity on him. "Did you want to read something?" Meiyuu's gaze, fixed somewhere in the vicinity of the plush chair at Elrond's side, fell to the vicinity of Elrond's slippers. "I don't know how. 'Sides, it's in… Elvish, I think…" Aragorn had called it that.
"I could read something to you. Perhaps it would help us both get back to sleep sooner," Elrond offered, a sly, knowing twinkle in his dark eyes.
Meiyuu nodded slowly, not wanting to seem to enthusiastic. "If you're not busy or anything," he said.
Elrond reassured the youth that he was not, and he walked over and took the green book off the shelf. He briefly glanced at the title and raised an arched, dark eyebrow before returning the book to the shelf, slight amusement in his dark eyes. Instead, he reached for a small, thick, leather-bound book with the words 'There and Back Again' written in gold letters on its cover and binding. Elrond walked over and sat down in his large chair, beckoning to Meiyuu. The boy followed and sat on the floor, his legs crossed.
The Elven lord began to speak, his smooth baritone voice softly filling the silence of the library. "There and Back Again, a Hobbit's Memoirs by Bilbo Baggins. I was in my hobbit hole when…"
* * * * * *
Aragorn stirred. Something was shaking. He opened his eyes and realized it wasn't him. His mind, foggy with sleep, blanked. Then… Legolas! He instantly turned to the Elf next to him. He was alarmed to see the shivering of the tense form, even more so to see his beloved convulse in pain.
"What's wrong?" Aragorn wrapped his arms about Legolas' shoulders. The elf instinctively buried his face in Aragorn's chest.
"I-I don't know," Legolas whispered, teeth chattering. "It…it hurts…"
Aragorn frowned. The trembling body in his arms was cold, almost icy to his touch. Quickly, he scooped up the Elf and, careful not to jar the treasure in his arms too much, ran towards his foster father's room. His lover's golden head pressed against his chest in silent misery. Beads of sweat collected on Legolas' brow as the Elf moaned. What was happening to him? Aragorn quickened his pace. And then he realized… he didn't know where Elrond was. By all the gods of——Aragorn felt like screaming. He skidded to a halt, wracking his brain frantically. Think, think… where would his skilled, intelligent, studious yet warrior-like foster father be? The gods know he was never in his room, but… Of course, Aragorn thought. The library! He pivoted and ran down the hallway at this left. He could just make out Elrond's smooth voice growing louder…near…there! He stood in the library entryway, stunned at the sight before him, temporarily forgetting his initial purpose. He couldn't believe his eyes.
Was that *Meiyuu* sitting at Elrond's feet, listening to his old friend's memoirs with a rapt expression on his face? It couldn't be. But who else had that cropped mahogany hair? Who else who have the look of a boy feigning disinterest when it was obvious he practically hung on every word? Who else was that young, yet pretended to be so old? For, save in sleep, never had the boy seemed so young, so innocent and curious. Except now…
The blond Elf in his arms suddenly convulsed and moaned. Aragorn ran over to his father, all thoughts in his mind replaced by his concern for his lover. He was gratified to see his foster father halt his reading and look up at his entry. If he was surprised to see that both were wearing only their leggings, the stoic Elven lord showed no sign of it. Elrond quickly put his book down and, careful to mark the page, examined the shaking Elf in Aragorn's arms. Meiyuu stared at his friend, large blue eyes taking in the shivering, the sweat, the convulsing. A faint memory stirred at the back of his mind. Something about… coldness, sweat, pain…Of course!
"He's going through withdrawal," Meiyuu muttered. He reached for Legolas' hands, his right hand beginning to glow.
"Withdrawal?" Elrond asked blankly, his attention riveted on the blue glow around the boy's hand.
"Yes. From the potion. I know the signs well…" Meiyuu said. He tightened his hands about Legolas', silently easing his friend's pain. He suddenly felt cold, so unbearable cold. He was only barely able to still the shivers building within him. He knew Aragorn and Elrond would stop him, and he couldn't help Legolas if he stopped… He clenched his teeth. It was one part of his powers he hated. Yes, he had the ability to help others, but… He bit the inside of his cheek, fighting to control the tremors his body ached to let out… But in order to ease another person's pain, one must take the pain into oneself.
First rule of the world, Meiyuu thought bitterly, the energy from emotions, from such things as love, hate, desire, pain, must be conserved. And that meant the pain Legolas was feeling couldn't miraculously vanish. It had to either change to something else, such as contentment, love, or desire, or it had to go somewhere else. That somewhere else being Meiyuu, of course. He felt torn about that. On the one hand, these powers brought him nothing but pain. If he were normal——but that was exactly the problem! If he were normal, his only friend would be dead. If he were normal, *he'd* be dead. Though that might not be such a bad thing, he thought absently. He instantly banned the thought from his mind. Gods… what was he thinking?! Was he cursed? Must be, he decided. To even think something like that… Unsurprisingly, he was not the only person in the room to berate himself.
Aragorn shared his misery. And, of course, it was his own fault. He should have known, should have guessed Legolas was going into withdrawal from the drug! The Elf had been taking it for years… his body was used to its intake and probably even demanded it, on some level. Of *course* he was feeling the effects of withdrawal. It was only natural… Aragorn choked. How long would it last? Gods…what if it took Legolas' life? If that's the case, Aragorn decided, I'll personally hunt Shira down and slice him into little bits. Fortunately for Shira, Legolas' symptoms seemed to be receding. His body calmed. The shivering completely ceased, save for a few tremors now and then. The tension in Legolas' body disappeared. He briefly closed his eyes in relief. Another was not so relieved.
Elrond placed a hand on Meiyuu's shoulder, afraid the boy was going to pass out. His naturally pale face was now ashen, the color having bled from it as he used his power on Legolas. However, after a few deep breaths, he seemed to be regaining his complexion.
"How many times will he grow through this, Meiyuu?" Aragorn questioned. "And will you go through this as well?"
Meiyuu shook his head. "Probably many more times. He's been taking the potion for a long time. Shira tricked Legolas into taking that draught at least once every day, to make his body dependant upon it."
Legolas opened his eyes. "Thank you, Meiyuu," he whispered, gratitude in his voice and eyes.
"No problem," the boy answered, willing the last vestige of pain to dissipate into normal energy. To his surprise, it worked. "I'm going back to bed. Good night." He turned and walked away.
Aragorn and Elrond frowned. There was something about the way the child walked…perhaps it was the fact he kept his gaze to the floor…perhaps it was the droop of those slim shoulders…perhaps it was the air of loneliness he held about himself. Whatever it was, they suddenly knew his pain. They suddenly discovered this knowledge Legolas had known from the very beginning of his acquaintance with the child. With the lost, lonely child.
Legolas shook his head slowly and tilted his head up to look at Aragorn. "You can put me down, now," he protested. "I can walk."
Aragorn raised a dark, teasing eyebrow.
Elrond sighed, "The stubbornness of youth…"
"And Meiyuu never answered my question," Aragorn pointed out. The human shook his head. "I'll have to ask him again later," he decided.
Legolas shook his head. "He deliberately avoided the question Aragorn. He feels like he's an intruder, like he doesn't belong."
Aragorn frowned. He'd guessed as much, but he'd assumed he was wrong. "What makes you say that?"
"Why do you think he walked away so fast, Aragorn? Meiyuu is not partial to sleep. He would not be rushing to his bed. And besides…" Legolas' eyes clouded in sorrow," as much as I hate to say this… he has reason. For so long, he and I, we used to be the best of friends. I think I might have been his only friend. But now…"
"But now there's me and Gimli and Frodo. And everyone else around this place," Aragorn finished for him. "Is that what you are saying, Legolas?"
Legolas sighed. "Think of how you'd feel, Aragorn, if you were a lonely child, despised, laughed at by almost everyone you know. And then the one friend you have suddenly has others friends. He suddenly spends more time with them. You try not to cling to him because you are a considerate boy and do not want to be selfish. But doesn't it still hurt?"
"You may be right, Legolas," Elrond mused. "He seems like he has never had a happy life… And he does appear to shy away from people a lot."
"You haven't seen the least of it. He's been doing it since I first met him. I'd hoped he'd grow out of it, but… it may well be impossible. Frodo was able to get him to laugh a little, but…" He frowned, "And you are not his only friend, Legolas. I care for him as well."
Legolas looked at Aragorn again. "Put me down, Aragorn. I am not a child, unlike Meiyuu."
"I like holding you," Aragorn smirked, utterly forgetting Elrond's presence in the room. "And it gives me other ideas…"
Elrond coughed discreetly, not altogether displeased with this situation. After all, he now knew the reason Aragorn had returned his daughter's necklace after the Quest.
Legolas and Aragorn turned to look at Elrond, and Legolas immediately renewed his struggles to get out of Aragorn's strong arms. It wasn't that he didn't like being held by his love… it was because there was a dark-haired Elven lord in front of them.
"Really, Aragorn… I have nothing against you pursuing your love affairs. Just don't do it in my library," Elrond smirked. "Return to your rooms. I believe I shall return to my room as well, after checking in on the boy. Mind my words."
Aragorn and Legolas both blushed brightly before following the Elven lord's example and retiring to their room. Once the door was locked behind them, however… Legolas purred, finding himself on the floor, hot hands on the skin of his waist. Aragorn tilted his face down, tasting those sweet, soft lips beneath his own. He plunged his tongue into the eager mouth. It was like drinking honey and wine. Such a delicious, exotic combination. Fire crept in his veins.
He was parched for his love. He could barely contain himself, squeezing the Elf against him possessively. Gods…Legolas was so beautiful, so desirable…All soft skin, wiry muscles, and delicate bone. Beautiful. So utterly beautiful inside and out. Gently, he teased the skin of the Elf's chest, playing with a nipple, watching it harden into a rosy ball with interest. So beautiful… His hand went lower…and lower… Legolas gasped, his back arching and his hands clutching Aragorn's back urgently. He only vaguely noticed his leggings were gone. So were Aragorn's, for that matter… There was pain, but it was accompanied by so much pleasure, so much happiness, that Legolas considered it a small price to pay.
"That was… new," Legolas breathed after they finished, his breath coming in short, tired gasps.
Aragorn murmured, "Indeed, Legolas… Are you all right?" He touched some of the new bruises on the body laying over him.
Legolas swatted Aragorn's behind playfully. "I am fine, Aragorn. Just a little sore. You needn't fuss so." They stumbled to their feet, pulling their leggings up again and fastening them before walking to the bed and falling on it in exhaustion.
"We probably woke a few Elves up," Aragorn said wryly.
"I don't really care, at least not right now," Legolas muttered, wrapping his arms about his love and pulling him closer.
Aragorn grinned. "Are you certain of that?" Now that their desire was sated… But that wasn't what was really worrying them. Simultaneously, they sighed. Meiyuu. Both were thinking of what might be done with the boy. What would happen to him? What should they do? Aragorn thought him annoying at times, but then, so was everyone. Meiyuu was no more irritating than anyone else could be. So how to make Meiyuu feel wanted…
Beside him, Legolas was facing a different dilemma. After all was said and done, it was *he* who caused the pain. He was the source of it. But how could he help Meiyuu? Without hurting Aragorn? The only way he could think of to help Meiyuu would be to leave Aragorn. But he didn't want to choose! He didn't want to choose between his love and his best friend for three years of his life. He couldn't abandon his lover. That would be tantamount to losing himself. But he couldn't hurt Meiyuu either… it would be like hurting his own son, if he had one. No… he couldn't choose.
Unbeknownst to them, the object of their thoughts sat in his room, facing his own dilemma. Meiyuu cried, silent silver tears soaking the fabric of his pants. Gods, he was so weak! He couldn't even keep the pain inside himself, where no one could possibly witness it. But all it took was for him to think of the happy look on Legolas' face when he was held by Aragorn, and the tears would start falling anew. Legolas did not need him any longer. If the Elf ever needed him at all. Meiyuu severely doubted that. He doubted that the strong Elf would truly need him, pathetic, teary him. No, it was always *he* who needed Legolas. Who clutched at the Elf's friendship in fear of losing it? Who just couldn't let the Elf go?
Gods, why did this always happen, Meiyuu asked silently, squeezing his eyes shut. Every time someone who actually cared about him came along, it always happened… They always left him… Father… sister… Mira… He didn't want to add Legolas to the list. But… Legolas was going to go away, too… Maybe not right now; maybe not for a while… but the Elf was going to leave… It was just a matter of time.
"I am alone… and I'll remain alone," Meiyuu sternly told himself, though his voice broke slightly. "I don't need anyone; I've never needed anyone." The words were false, empty. Even to him.
Outside his door, Elrond closed his dark eyes sorrowfully. The Elven lord solemnly listened.
Meiyuu angrily wiped his tears away, scowling. The important thing was that Legolas was safe; that's what he had to concentrate on. He was going to lose his friendship, but Legolas was alive! Even his pain could not wipe away his relief at that. And he'd finally saved someone, too... Now, what should he do, Meiyuu wondered. It would be better to leave…The longer he stayed, the harder it was going to be to leave. And if he left, maybe he could get Shira and Tsuku to pursue him, instead of Legolas. They might ignore the Elf in favor of capturing him, if he made himself an easier target. Meiyuu shuddered slightly. He didn't want it; he didn't want to be forced to use his powers for their evil plans. But perhaps he could keep one step ahead of them and remain uncaptured… He stood.
Elrond and his sons hadn't given him his old clothes back. He was going to have to keep his new ones. He went over to the window in his room and opened it. The boy ignored the strange tingling in his mind, and the strange feeling creeping through him, and climbed onto the nearest branch.
Elrond opened his eyes in time to see a slender, bare foot disappear through the window. He entered the room and peered out of the window silently, seeing Meiyuu climbing through the trees easily. The Elven lord sighed, before he quickly leaving the room to find one of his three children to retrieve the boy.
************************** Outside of Rivendell **************************
Shira looked at the black-garbed figure in front of him. "Go on and do what you were told to do, while I finish preparing the spell. They will not hand the brat over willingly," Shira ordered.
The man in front of him shrugged. "Are you certain the spell will force him to come out to us?" he asked skeptically.
Shira rolled his eyes. "Of course. Now go try your false diplomacy on them."
He closed his eyes and began chanting. His companion shrugged but did as he was told. He told the Elven guards at the borders that he wished to speak with the Lord of this Elven kingdom.
It was then that Meiyuu saw him, freezing in the tree he was climbing. He stared down at his assailant. Forget leaving, Meiyuu, he told himself. He had to warn Legolas and the others. The bastard was here. Here! Probably with Shira in tow, too… Caught in the surprise of finding his enemies so close to his friends, the boy did not see Elrohir stealthily climbing through the trees after him.
In another part of Rivendell, Aragorn was surprised to hear Elrond calling his name. Quickly, both he and Legolas dressed and hurried to the Elven lord's side.
"What's wrong?" Aragorn asked as soon as he saw his foster father.
"Meiyuu… He's trying to leave," Elrond told them. "I sent Elrohir after him when I couldn't find you, Aragorn."
Legolas paled. "Why is he trying to leave?" he asked faintly.
Elrond shook his head slowly. "He is a very confused, lost boy. I doubt he has had any stability in his life. From what Aragorn has told me, it seems that everyone who has ever loved and cared for him has always left him alone, in the end…"
"And he probably thinks I will leave him, too," Legolas finished. "Meiyuu decided to leave before he could be hurt again…" A sob wrenched itself from his throat. That he knew that he, *he*, the professed friend of Meiyuu, should cause the boy pain… that the boy should leave due to that pain… The gentle Elf buried his face in his hands.
Aragorn sighed, reaching out and pulling Legolas close. "It's not your fault; neither of us could have known. What matters now is finding him, Legolas."
'My lord, someone has come to see you,' another Elf said. 'He awaits you at the borders, for he does not wish to come inside.'
'I'll be right there,' Elrond replied. "Come with me, Estel, Legolas."
Aragorn started. Then, after a brief, questioning glance at his lover, he nodded. Together, the three friends left to see the visitor. It wasn't until they grew closer that Aragorn and Legolas recognized the figure waiting there. They stopped, wary of the danger before them. So focused were they on the dark-robed person, however, they failed to notice the blue-eyed child in the branch above them. Aragorn's foster father, however, thought he held no knowledge of the darkness before him, shared their suspicions. Elrond's did not trust the man in his home. There was something about him… His suspicions soon increased.
"You have someone here who does not belong with Elves," the man said arrogantly.
Elrond lifted his chin. "Indeed? And who might that be?"
The man smirked. "A young boy. He is the ward of the town of Seidou Rosuto. He must be handed over. He is too young to make decisions for himself, and none of you are his legal guardians."
Legolas tensed. "No!"
"I don't think so," Aragorn growled.
Meiyuu stiffened. Him? No shit, the boy thought, smacking his forehead. Of course no one here was his legal guardian; his legal guardians were all dead. Hmm… it seemed to be a dangerous occupation…
Elrond shook his head. "No," he said simply, with a slight edge to his voice.
"Hand him over, and we'll leave the Elf- Legolas- alone," the man lied.
Aragorn shook his head. Hand over a child to be tortured? Even to save his lover? No… he didn't think he would ever do that. He grimly smiled. Legolas wouldn't *let* him do that. But where was the boy? If he was seen…
A firm hand suddenly grabbed Meiyuu around the waist, another hand covering his mouth, cutting off his cry. Elrohir easily picked the thrashing youth up, and made for the boy's room. He was not prepared for what Meiyuu did next. The boy focused his gift, feeling a tremendous surge of energy course through him. But instead of flinging his attacker away from him as he had planned… Elrohir, unprepared for the mental attack, lost his balance on the tree branch, and the two of them fell. Shit, was the only thing either could think before they tumbled from their place in the tree.
Ow… Elrohir moaned. He slowly pushed himself from the hard ground. He was lucky he only got the wind knocked out of him. His father could heal many wounds, but having broken bones meant a great deal of pain. Pain Elrohir would rather not feel. He made a note to himself *never* to fall from trees again. Not that he voluntarily chose to fall from the tree…
What *was* that, Elrohir wondered. He abruptly noticed everyone was staring at him and Meiyuu. Including the stranger who wanted his father to give Meiyuu to him. And where was the child? A soft groan gave Elrohir his answer. He blinked. No… that couldn't be…
Meiyuu had shut his eyes when he had fallen and only now peeked them open. Falling didn't hurt as much as Meiyuu thought it would. What was this semi-soft thing beneath him? He looked down, and blanched. He had fallen on top of Aragorn. And the latter did *not* look happy, having been knocked down by the force of his fall. In fact, Aragorn was scowling at him, an eyebrow raised in wait.
Uh-oh. Meiyuu's bright, blue eyes went wide, and he gulped, "Sorry?"
To be continued
