2nd Thursday Night/Friday

After Rae and Jesse had been admitted Amanda headed towards Rae's room. Something had happened to her in that place, she had a bruise on her face and her hand had been split back open. Amanda thought that she would sit with her for a little while, just in case she needed her. As she got towards the door she could hear Rae calling out from inside. She ran the remainder of the way and opened the door.

"No, no, don't touch me!"

Rae could see Phil Levington coming towards her. Jesse stood with her, but he could do nothing. She saw Phil's hands touching her neck and she tried to move, but she couldn't. "No, no, don't touch me!" She went to back away but there was a wall, and photos of her everywhere. She tried to turn, but all she could see were pictures of Jesse and Steve. They didn't look like them, but in her dream world it was all obvious. "Rae. Rae! Wake up, sweetie, wake up." She heard a voice that didn't belong with her, a safe voice and she tried to move towards it, but the dream wouldn't let go. She saw her gun and then Jesse fall, and she screamed "NO! Jesse, No!"

"Rae. Rae! Wake up, sweetie, wake up." Amanda tried to get through to her. Suddenly Rae began to scream. Amanda pressed the buzzer by the bed and the nurse was there, almost immediately. "Could you get Dr. Collins up here now, please?"

"NO! Jesse, No!" Rae sat up in her bed. Her eyes were glazed, and Amanda knew that she wasn't awake. She took her gently by the shoulders.

"Rae, it's over. Jesse's safe. Rae, he's safe!" Slowly she felt Rae's body relax. She watched as she slumped back down onto the pillow.

"Amanda? Oh, God, Amanda, what happened? I didn't shoot Jesse, did I?"

"Rae? No, No! He's in the ICU, but he's going to be fine." Amanda heard a noise and looked up expecting to see Dr. Collins, but instead it was Steve, standing in the doorway. He looked worriedly at his friends.

"Amanda? I could hear Rae down the corridor, is she alright?"

"She had a nightmare, Steve. It's hardly surprising, considering."

"No, I guess not. I'll go back to Jesse then. When you have a moment could you come down?"

"Yeah, I'm just waiting for Dr. Collins. I'll be down in a minute.

"Steve, is he awake?"

"No, Rae, and you shouldn't be either. Let them give you a sedative. You know they help with the dreams." He smiled at her, and then he left the room. He couldn't tell her that Jesse was already fighting against an infection, a mild one, thankfully, which they seemed to have caught in time. But he knew that an infection was bad news, however mild it was. That wasn't surprising either; he'd hardly been in sanitary conditions over the last few hours.

Steve saw Dr. Collins rushing along the hallway. Good, she needs you.

"Rae, Dr. Bentley, what happened?"

"She had a nightmare, can you give her a sedative? I think even she realises she needs one, don't you?" Rae nodded. "I need to go and see Steve, I'll be back later."

"I'm sorry, Dr. Collins, I just hate taking them so much, but I don't want to dream."

He saw her shudder, and after he'd administered the correct dosage, sat down on the chair Amanda had recently vacated. "Would you like me to stay with you until you fall asleep again?"

"Yes, please, if you're not too busy." Her eyes were already closing. She knew she would fall asleep easily without the drugs, but not keep the dreams at bay.

Five minutes later the doctor rose from the chair and left the room. He went across to the nurse's station. "I want Detective Yeager checked every thirty minutes. Don't wake her, but if she seems restless at all, I want to be paged."

"Yes, Doctor." With that he returned to the ER.

Amanda had hurried to the ICU as soon as she knew Rae would be all right. She'd seen the worry in Steve's eyes, and she knew it wasn't just for Rae.

Jesse was lying there, surrounded by machines, and Amanda could see that the vacuum was helping to empty his chest cavity. "Steve, Mark, what's happened?"

"His temperature shot up, he has an infection. Dammit, I tried so hard to keep him clean." Mark's hand slammed down against his palm.

"Mark, he would have died if you hadn't been there, you know that. You can't blame yourself. I didn't see where he was, but I would bet it wasn't very hygienic."

"He was chained to a radiator, Amanda, and you saw him as he left, he was covered in blood and his own vomit. I would be more surprised if he didn't get an infection." Steve looked over at her.

"Yes, son, but you're a cop, not the doctor who treated him." Mark got up and walked around the room. Steve and Amanda looked at each other. They knew that he had to get this out of his system.

"Mark, the antibiotics will help him. But you all stressed out and up tight won't. Let's go and get a coffee and a bit of air. Then we'll come back. Steve, you'll stay won't you?"

"Of course. Go on, Dad, you know Amanda's right." Mark nodded his head and smiled at his friend and his son. Then he looked over at Jesse lying pale and unconscious on the bed. Mark knew they were trying to help, he'd got Jesse this far; he knew it wasn't over yet, but Jesse was already fighting back.

"I'll be ten minutes, ok?"

Steve nodded. If he was honest, he didn't want to be the only one with Jesse, but he knew that his dad needed the break.

Amanda and Mark walked up the hallway. As they passed Rae's room they both looked in through the door. They could see that she was sleeping peacefully now, her injured hand resting on the bed covers. They looked at each other. Tomorrow would be another hard day for her.

It was just after nine on Friday morning when Rae awoke properly. First of all she couldn't remember where she was, or what had happened, but slowly it came back to her. Jesse! She reached over and pressed the buzzer and a nurse appeared at the door.

"I need to go and see Jesse... sorry Dr. Travis." The nurse looked at her.

"I'll get Dr. Collins."

Rae stared at her as she left the room. She hadn't liked the way the nurse had spoken. Something had happened, something bad. She sat up, she felt a little light-headed and slightly sick, but she had to get to Jesse. By the time Dr. Collins arrived, she was on her feet and steadying herself before leaving the room.

"And just what do you think you're doing, Detective?"

Rae sat down heavily on the bed. "I know that something has happened to Jesse. I need to go to him, right now."

Dr. Collins looked at her. "He crashed during the night, but Dr. Sloan got him ba..."

Rae went grey. "Why didn't somebody come and get me. If he'd died, would you have kept that from me as well?" Rae was shouting now, but she didn't stand up, she wasn't sure that her legs would hold her. Dr. Collins called the nurse across, and spoke to her by the door.

"We'll go to see him, together, but only for a few minutes. He doesn't need visitors, and you don't need any more stress." The nurse pushed a wheelchair into the room and Rae sank gratefully into it.

"Thank you, Doctor, I don't actually know where Jesse is." It took no time at all to get to Jesse's room, but before they arrived Rae could see Mark in with him and Amanda and Steve sitting outside. They were all there with him. He hasn't been alone.

Steve saw her first and came over to her. "Rae, are you alright." To her surprise, he put his hand up and touched the bruise that was now angrily spread across one side of her face. She could only nod.

"Jesse? Steve, why didn't you come and get me? I love him, Steve, what if I'd lost him and not even known...?" She couldn't continue. She raised her injured hand to her mouth.

"Come on, come and see him." He spoke softly. Steve took the chair from Dr. Collins and wheeled her in.

Rae was absolutely delighted when she saw Jesse give her a very small smile. "Jesse, oh, Jess." Steve moved her as close as he could get her to the bed. The tears filled her eyes as she reached out and took Jesse's hand in her own. She looked over at Mark and swallowed hard. "Dr. Collins said that he crashed in the night."

"Dr. Collins, would also have said that he was, once again, out of danger, if Dr. Collins had been allowed to finish his sentence!" He looked over at his patient, who had the grace to look embarrassed.

"I'm sorry, doctor." She turned back to Jesse. "Jesse, I'm so sorry about all of this. First Steve, then Alex, and now you." At the mention of Alex she saw Jesse start to get agitated. "What, what's happened to Alex?" she looked over at Mark.

"Nothing as far as I know. They're just waiting for the swelling to go down a little on his arm before they release him. He's fine, Jesse, honestly."

Jesse tried to speak, Mark lifted the mask that was covering his face. "I was phoned... yesterday... they said he was in danger... had an infection."

"Jesse." It was Steve that spoke. "We found Levington's diary. It was him who phoned you, Alex was never in any danger." He saw Rae squeeze Jesse's hand, and his best friend shut his eyes, to try to stop the tears that were forming there.

"I thought ... I thought I'd let him down."

"I think you should come back with me now, Rae." Rae turned to Dr Collins as if to disagree, but then backed down. She stood up, and very gingerly leant over and kissed Jesse on the lips, before Mark replaced the mask.

"I'll come back, Jesse, whenever you're ready. I get the feeling I'm not going too far today." She smiled at him, and sat back down in the chair.

"Rae," she turned as she heard Jesse's voice, muffled by the mask. He looked up at Mark, and he lifted it once again. "I love you, Rae, none of this will change that." Mark put the mask back on, and Rae, with tears shining in her eyes, turned and let herself be pushed away.

Once he'd said what he had to, Jesse felt completely drained. He couldn't remember ever hurting like he did right now. It even hurt to blink. He slowly shut his eyes and tried to put the picture of Rae being touched by that creep out of his mind.

He'd known, when he saw his hands moving down towards her neck, that Levington was in trouble. But he hadn't known if she was still armed. He'd seen her body tense up, as he half stood, half lay there. Rae's right hand was covered with blood, the other one was flexing into a fist and out again. Then all the pent up anger was released as fingers touched the one place guaranteed, had Phil realised it, to sign his death warrant. Only because he had shouted out was the man still alive. Now she would have to face him in court, maybe he should have kept quiet. No, I couldn't let her kill, not even him.

He felt his eyes getting heavy. His mind switched to Alex. He should've known that it was a trap. Should've phoned the hospital back... The thoughts disappeared; he slipped off to sleep.

Steve looked across to him. He'd seen his friend's face changing. He guessed that Jesse was thinking about difficult things. Then Jesse's face started to relax and Steve knew that the sedative was working again. He felt his own body begin to relax too. Steve stood up; he needed to speak to Rae, privately. He'd been on the phone to the station; he had information for her.

Rae was back in bed when he got there. She wasn't asleep, she was looking at nothing in particular, and he knew that her mind was working overtime too.

He tapped on the door, and when she smiled at him, he entered. "Rae, I need to speak to you."

"Jesse. Is he alright?" She sat straight up in the bed.

"Hey, easy! Yes he's fine, in fact only two minutes ago he was fast asleep." Steve sat down on the chair and took her small left hand in between his two large ones. They felt warm and safe around hers. She smiled at him.

"I called the station this morning. Levington is out of danger, you shot him twice in the shoulder, I think it was pure panic that made him pass out!" Rae smiled, but Steve's next words wiped the smile away again. "He's going to plead not guilty, and there's no chance of an insanity plea. You'll have to face him in court. You know he had the photos Lloyd took? Rae, they'll have to be submitted as evidence."

"Oh, God, I should have killed him when I had the chance."

"Detective, I think I will pretend you didn't say that." Rae looked round to see Chief Masters looking in through the door. That man always catches me out when I'm in a hospital bed! That sounds terrible. Both Steve and the Chief wondered why she was smiling.

"Sorry, Sir. No, I don't mean it. Not even that scumbag deserves to die. He didn't kill anybody, although it wasn't for the want of trying."

"Detective, I contacted your children last night. I felt that they should know why it was impossible to get hold of you. And I knew that your mind was on other things."

Steve was amazed. This man obviously had a soft spot for his partner. Hey, stranger things have happened. I can't think of any right now, but I'm sure they have.

"Thank you. I'll ring them as soon as I can."

"Ah, you may not want to thank me in a minute. I got a call from their father this morning. It seems that your eldest son is, as we speak, flying over to see you. He said that, John, is that his name?" Upon receiving a nod the Chief continued, "That John had said, this time, he was coming whether anybody wanted him to or not."

Rae smiled. "That sounds like John, as stubborn as his mother! Thank you, Chief, now I'm safe again, it will be lovely to see him." She paused, "It's a shame they couldn't all come, but as my apartment needs a total overhaul I guess it's for the best." Suddenly Rae realised that she was having a normal conversation with this man, and not only that, she was relaxed and under no pressure. She sighed, and lay back on the pillow.

Both men misread this, and the Chief turned to go. "You're obviously tired, Detective, I'll speak to you again soon. I've arranged for your son to be picked up at the airport, and brought straight here, I hope that's satisfactory."

It was Rae's turn to be amazed. She just nodded, and the Chief left the room.

"Rae, I'll go, too, you go back off to sleep."

She put her hand on his arm and stopped him from getting up. "I'm not that tired, Steve, I lay back, because I realised that, for a while at least, I don't have anything to worry about. Well, except that John will eat me out of house and home. I need to stock up on noodles."

"I'm gonna to go anyway. Just rest, Rae, we'll need to talk all this through, but now is not the time." He leant over and kissed her on the cheek. She smiled up at him, and then as he had told her to, she shut her eyes, and, without realising it, was asleep in less than two minutes.

In another part of the hospital Phil Levington was lying in his room with a two-man guard on the door. He couldn't believe that he was here, without her. He tried to think what mistake he had made. Well never mind. The judge would realise that he had done nothing wrong and he would just start to woo her once again. He shut his eyes picturing her as he rested, a smile flicking across his face, as his thoughts raced.

It was a lot later when Rae woke up again, and realised with a sinking stomach that she was hungry. And if it's macaroni cheese, I'm leaving! She pressed the buzzer and the nurse came in. "Did I miss lunch? Only I'm feeling a little hungry."

"I'll go and see if I can get something for you."

"What was it today?"

"Cauliflower Cheese!"

"Oh great. Still, I guess I don't have much choice do I? Actually, I do. Can you get me a take out from BBQ Bob's?" The nurse nodded at her, wrote down what she wanted and left the room. Rae let her mind wander. She wondered where Jan was. She had wanted to be friends, and Rae could do with a few of them. She looked down at her injured hand. The throbbing was like a drum beating; it felt very tight and painful. She ran her fingers down her cheek and suddenly the image of that hated face was before her eyes. She gasped, and moved back involuntarily against the bed head. She knew it was going to take her some time to be able to confront her fears. If she was going to have to see him in court she may not have the time that she needed. Rae looked out towards the nurse's station. She needed to get a message to Dr. Dobson.

It was late afternoon before Jesse woke again. He still ached but his breathing felt easier. He looked around the room. Steve was gone, so, too, was Amanda, but Mark was still there, asleep in the chair. He tried to move and ease himself into a slightly more comfortable position, and saw his friend's eyes open.

"Jesse? Are you all right?" Mark got up and moved across to him. The room was a little dim. "Will it be all right if I turn the light on?" He received a small nod, went and slowly turned the switch, and let the light gradually increase.

"Can I get you anything? Would you like some of the ice slivers?" Jesse nodded again, and Mark placed some of them into his mouth.

"Rae. Mark, I need to see Rae." Mark took the mask away from Jesse's face and watched him intently. "Please, Mark, I'll be sensible, but I have to see her. That, that creep... he did things to her, Mark, and I need to talk to her." He could see that Jesse was getting very tense, and hear that his breathing was coming in short gasps. He put the mask back on and looked at him with concern in his eyes.

"I'll go and get her for you, Jesse, but you have to stay calm, you know that. The process of re-expansion takes time. I don't want you to make your situation worse. If you start to get breathless I shall take her back to her room. ok?"

Jesse nodded and watched his friend as he left the room. He tried to be calm, but he needed to see her. He knew that she would be more traumatised than he was and he wanted to let her know that he would be here for her. Somewhere in the back of his mind he thought he'd already spoken to her today, but he couldn't be sure.

Rae was driving herself nuts in her room. She had spoken to Dr. Collins, and he refused to let her go home today. If she behaved, he'd said that he would discharge her tomorrow, but only with strict limitations on what she could and couldn't do with her hand. She heard a tap on the door and looked round. A grin appeared on her face as she saw Mark standing there.

"Mark, come in, I am desperate for somebody, anybody, to talk to. Oh, sorry, I didn't mean that the way it sounded." She smiled at him, and looked a little embarrassed.

"I'll sit and talk to you if you would like, or, I could take you down to see Jesse."

"Oh, Mark, yes please." She sat up and swung her legs off the bed. Mark went to help her but she shook her head. "I'm fine, Mark, he didn't hurt me physically, apart from my hand and my face." She tried to hold in a shiver, but she knew that Mark had seen it.

"I know you can't tell me, honey, but promise me you will talk to somebody, and soon."

Rae looked at the concern that was written across her friend's face. "I promise, Mark." Mark got a wheelchair and pushed it over to her. "Can I get out of this when we get to Jesse's room? Then I can sit closer to him." She smiled again when she saw Mark nod in her direction, and let herself be pushed back to Jesse's room.

Jesse's face lit up when he saw her with Mark, and he was very relieved when she got out of the wheelchair and sat on the chair next to the bed. He picked up her injured hand with great care and brushed it with his fingers.

"Oh, Jess, look what he did to you, all because of me." She saw Jesse shake his head slowly and then look over to Mark.

"You can take it off while you speak, but it must go back on again quickly." Mark looked over at them both.

"He probably wouldn't have done so much if I hadn't kept answering him back." He gave her a quick smile, and put the mask back on. He looked over at Mark again, and was relieved when he saw his friend move outside the door.

"Rae, you must go and see Brian. Today, if you can. I saw what he did to you..." He stopped; he was running out of breath.

"Jess, please, don't. Let me talk. I will go, I spoke to Helen, and he's going to come and see me when he finishes his appointments today. I have to talk to him, because I see Levington's face when I shut my eyes, and I..." She stopped talking; she didn't want to add to his distress. She would tell him about her dreams again, when he was stronger. She placed her hand on his cheek. She hated these masks; she lifted it up gently and kissed him on the lips. After she had replaced it she picked up his hand and moved it towards her neck. She let it rest there, just for a few seconds, then she removed it. "I needed it to be you who was the last person to touch me there." She smiled at him, but he could see the anguish on her face.

After that they had no need of talk. Rae sat with her hand over his; they just enjoyed the fact that they were still together. Mark let them be for just about ten minutes, and then he came back into the room. "Rae, you need to go back to your room now. I think I saw Alex go in to wait for you. You can come back to see Jesse in the morning." Rae nodded. She kissed Jesse on the forehead and got up out of the chair.

Mark was right; Alex was waiting for her when she got back. He stood up as she was wheeled into the room. His arm was in plaster, and his face was still swollen, but he did look a little more human than the last time she had seen him.

"Rae, are you all right? I heard what happened."

Mark parked the wheelchair and she got out of it and sat back on the bed. "Thank you, Mark. I hope that's the last time I have to use that thing. I'll see you later."

As Mark left them together Alex smiled at her. "Look at us, not exactly firing on all six cylinders are we?"

"Six? It's only four in England." She returned his smile. "How are you, Alex, is your arm going to be ok?"

"Yeah, thank goodness, no muscle damage. I'll bet without the plaster it's the size of Steve's right now. Unfortunately, by the time it's removed mine will be normal size again. And my face too, I'm pleased to say. I think I'll scare the patients looking like this."

"Yeah me too, but maybe in my line of work it doesn't hurt to scare a few people."

As they sat there enjoying each other's company without actually saying very much there was a knock at the door. Rae looked round and her face lit up. "John? Oh, John, honey," she got up and ran to him.

Alex looked over; standing just inside the door was a tall, dark haired young man. He was obviously his mother's son; he had dark brown eyes, and her smile. He stood up. "I guess I'll leave you two together. I'm being discharged in the morning, Rae, but I'll be up to see you and Jesse before I go."

Rae turned to him and placed a hand on his uninjured arm. "You saved him for me the first time, Alex, I'll never forget that. Thank you." She kissed him on the cheek and the young doctor blushed and hurried from the room.

"Mum, who was that?" John looked at her. He couldn't believe how much he'd missed her, and how worried he'd been about her.

"He's my friend, John, his name's Alex and he saved Jesse's life. I've made some good friends while I've been here."

"Yeah, and run into some real weirdoes as well. What happened to you this time? It wasn't Mark who phoned Dad. He said he was the Chief of Police, or was he joking? And I was picked up from the airport in a police car. That was embarrassing!"

"No, he wasn't joking, he really is the Chief of Police. I didn't know anything about any of it until this morning. You needn't have come you know, I'm all right now."

"Oh, yeah right. Look at your hand, and your face. Mum, what happened?"

Rae took a breath. "I had a stalker, John, and at the end he got violent with me. He also tried to kill Steve, Alex and Jesse, although thankfully he didn't succeed." She took another breath. "Now I have to face him in court, because he won't plead guilty."

"And I would imagine that I can't talk you into coming home?"

"Oh, no, no way, I really like it here. I've just been unlucky that's all." There was another knock on the door, Rae turned. She could see Steve through the glass.

"Come in." Steve entered. "Steve, this is my eldest son, John. John, this is my partner, Lieutenant Steve Sloan."

"Well, you're not doing a very good job of keeping her safe are you?"

"John! I'm sorry, Steve."

"Don't be. When you're eighteen and worried about your mom, you can get away with speaking your mind. Besides he only said what I'm feeling. John, the cop who brought you from the airport is waiting outside, he wants to get you booked into your hotel."

"Ok, I'll come back later, Mum."

John glared at Steve; hugged his mother, kissed her on the cheek and left the room without another word.

"Steve, I'm so sorry."

"No, Rae, he's right. Every time I see your face or your hand I know that I should have prevented it. I'm sorry. I failed you, I know that."

"Steve, don't. Do you blame me for the chloroform incident?"

"No, of course not."

"This is the same. I don't blame you; the guy is a fruit loop. He still scares the hell out of me, but I won't let him spoil the relationship we've built up. So, get over it, Lieutenant." She smiled at him. She could see Brian Dobson waiting patiently outside the door with Dr. Collins and wondered if he could hear what was happening inside the room. Steve put his arms around her and gave her a hug, and then he too saw Dr. Dobson.

"I'd better go, Rae, I'll see you later. I think I may go over and have a word with your son, buy him a soda and see if we can't sort things out."

Steve opened the door and swapped places with the two doctors. Rae went back and got on the bed. She really didn't want to talk about what had happened, but she knew that if she didn't do it now, she might chicken out altogether.

"Rae, Dr. Dobson wants to speak with you. I have said I have no objections if you don't."

"No, I think I'll be fine, thank you, Doctor."

Dr. Collins smiled at her. "If you need me, buzz." He shut the door as he left the room.

"This is becoming quite a habit, Detective." He had a smile on his face, but Rae was instantly mortified.

"I'm sorry, Doctor, would you rather I saw somebody else?"

"Good heavens no. It was supposed to be a joke. I apologise. Let's start again."

Rae took a breath. "I'm sorry, yes, let's start again. Should I laugh, or would you like to come in again?"

They smiled at each other.

"What happened, Detective?"

Rae looked away. She shut her eyes, and Phil Levington was there. She shuddered. "I met my stalker." It was a simple statement, but Dr. Dobson knew that when it had happened it had cost her a lot.

"I don't want to say anything to you. I know it's fresh in your mind, and I think you should just tell me what happened.

Rae looked at him. She'd thought that he would help her through this, and that had been bad enough. But this, she had a feeling would be worse.

"I suppose I knew I was in serious trouble when this happened." She held up her injured hand. "Jesse had been called into the hospital. When I got to the station I put my hand in my drawer to get my phone to check he was alright and it was full of broken glass." Rae paused. Slowly she related what had happened until they got to where Jesse was being held. She felt short of breath, and had to stop talking.

"Stand up, Detective, and take some deep breaths. When you've calmed yourself a little we'll continue."

Rae did as she was told. Surprisingly she felt calmer quite quickly. As she sat down she began to talk again.

"When we went to the photo store I knew that I would go in to confront him. I couldn't let him hurt Jesse any more than he already had, or Steve. But as we walked up to the front entrance... he shot Steve. We were both wearing vests, but it flattened him. Levington said that if I didn't go in. he would hurt Jesse again, but I'd planned to go in anyway. It had to be me. I couldn't risk anybody else, not any more." She stopped. It was about to get hard.

"I went into the room, and ... and all I could see were pictures of me. He'd been in my home, he'd followed me when I was at work." She shivered. As she spoke she began to realise just how big the man's obsession was, and how quickly it had come to a head.

"I stood there and looked at the pictures. All the ones that had Jesse or Steve in ... had been mutilated. I couldn't hear any noise. I didn't know if Jesse was..." She couldn't say the word. "Then I..."

"You didn't know if Jesse was what?"

"I didn't know if he was ... still alive." She couldn't say dead, she had been so sure that he was, but she couldn't say it. "I felt a gun behind my ear. It was still warm; I knew it was the one fired at Steve. He made me walk further into the room; I knew I didn't have any choice, so I did as I was told. Then he told me to turn around." She stopped. She was shaking now, and she could feel the tears behind her eyes. "I can't."

"Yes you can. What did he do after you had turned round?"

"He... he had forced me back against the wall... he began to kiss me...he wanted me to take off my vest...but before I could. he ... touched me... and he kept on touching me." The tears had started to fall now. She didn't try to stop them, because she knew that she couldn't. "I tried to push him away from me, but my hand..." she held it up, as if it would tell the doctor everything he wanted to know, then she let it fall. "I tried to move my head to stop him... I could feel him against me..." This time she had to stop. She rushed from the room, Dr. Dobson, could hear her, as she was sick in the bathroom. He didn't go to her; he knew that she would use the time to get more than her stomach under control.

It was ten minutes before Rae came back. She looked extremely pale, and her eyes pleaded with him to let her stop. "Sit back down, we need to carry on a little further."

Rae got a drink of water from by the bed. "I'm so glad I had barbeque instead of the cauliflower cheese for lunch." She shuddered.

"That is way too much information, Detective." But he smiled at her, and she returned it.

"I'm sorry, Doctor, do you want me to carry on from before?"

"Of course, you have to say it, out loud, Detective, otherwise it will haunt you."

"Ok... He had his body up against mine ... I could feel it ...and his hands... I couldn't keep moving my head and he ... he got his tongue in my mouth... Oh, God... I ... I bit down on it, hard... He punched me..." Her hand moved involuntarily to her face.

"I thought he was responsible for that. How did he make you feel when he hit you?"

"I was scared, but I was scared anyway, disgusted, sickened. Oh, so many feelings, and all in a split second, because after he hit me he grabbed me by the hair and pulled me up again and ... he put the gun back to my ear."

"He wanted Steve's cell phone number, but I didn't know it ... he didn't ... didn't believe me and grabbed my hand." She paused, as she relived the pain in her mind again. "I felt the stitches burst and ... and then I heard Jesse." The relief in her voice was evident. Until then she had thought that her lover was dead, even if she couldn't say the words.

"After he spoke to Steve... he took me into the other room... Jesse was handcuffed to the radiator. He ... he had been beaten. and was covered in blood. But he was alive. I tried to get to him but Levington pulled me back. He said that I had to ... to watch him ... die I tried to talk him out of it. He hadn't killed anybody up till then, even though I know he wanted to. I tried to get him to let Jesse go, but he wouldn't." She stopped. The worst bit was left. She didn't want to continue.

Rae stood up and walked over to the window. She felt a hand on her shoulder and looked round. "Come and sit down, Detective. I know this is hard for you, and I know that you have been talking for a long time, but you are going to have to go over this again and again. Believe me, once it is out in the open, and you have told somebody about it, it will be a little easier for you. It will also be much more healthy."

"He wouldn't let Jesse go, he walked towards me... he started to touch me again, on my face..." She stopped. The tears had started again. She had to tell somebody about her greatest fear. Only Jesse knew, and with him it wasn't a problem.

"He... he put his hand..." Her breath was coming fast and shallow now. Suddenly she couldn't, really couldn't do it. She got up and fled the room. She had nowhere to go, she knew that, but she just couldn't stay.

Dr. Dobson got calmly to his feet and followed her out of the room. He walked towards the ICU, and as he got closer he could see her. She hadn't gone into Jesse's room. He stood next to her where she was leaning up against her good hand in a corner. "We're going to go to my office. I think that we need to finish this." Rae said nothing. She had nothing left to fight with. "Or, we could go back to your room, if you promise me not to try to escape again."

Rae just nodded. As they turned Rae could see Steve, standing at the door to Jesse's room. He looked over at her and she could see the concern in his eyes.

"It's all right, Lieutenant, we just had a short interval, we're fine again now."

"Rae?" Steve didn't sound convinced.

"I'm sorry, please." She looked at Dr. Dobson, and then turned to her partner. "Steve."

"You can have five minutes, Detective, but I will be waiting in your room." He left the two colleagues together and walked back down the hallway.

Steve put his hand on Rae's shoulder and felt her dissolve. "Oh, God, Steve, help me." He breathed a sigh of relief; at last she had asked him for help. He guided her to one of the chairs outside the ICU and then he knelt in front of her. She began to sob. She had cried with him before, when she had been scared on the beach, but that was nothing to this. Her whole body was wracked with the emotion that was tearing her apart. He was just starting to get really concerned about her when he felt her begin to get a hold of herself. Slowly she looked up at him. "He kissed and touched me, Steve... Levington. I thought... he was going to... rape me... right there in front of Jesse, and then ... then he touched ... he touched my neck." She stopped, but Steve understood instantly.

"He touched you where Leticia Howard touched you. Oh, Rae."

The tears had begun again, but they were tears of relief now. He understood, she had told him, and he understood. She clung to him; she felt such a sense of release.

"Do you want me to come with you, to speak to Dr. Dobson? Jesse is fast asleep at the moment."

"Yes, yes please. You don't have to say anything, I know that I have to tell somebody who won't understand, but I just couldn't, I needed to tell you or Jesse first."

"Rae, does Jesse know about your neck?"

She nodded. "He's the only person I can let touch it."

"He was there, Rae, he'll understand."

"I hadn't thought of that. God, I feel like I'm coming apart, if he hadn't been there, I wouldn't have been either." She paused. "Thank you, Steve." He almost had to carry her back to her room. She had so little energy left, he thought that she might not be able to finish her story, but when he had put her on the bed and covered her over with the sheets, he saw her compose herself.

Dr. Dobson looked over at Steve. "And I suppose you are going to stay, Lieutenant?"

Steve just smiled at him and Rae began to speak. "He ran his fingers down my face, not where he had punched me, but the other side. Then ... then he put his hand on my neck." Her own hand moved instinctively to her throat, she didn't touch it but carried straight on talking. She had to finish this now. "I. I couldn't bear it . I moved away from him and I kicked out at him. I caught him... right where I'd meant to and he went down, I got my gun from my belt and I shot him, twice... If Jesse hadn't called out... I would have emptied my gun into him. But he did, and he sounded so weak that I forgot about Levington and ran to him... I couldn't get the cuffs off him so I came out of the building..." She stopped again, but this time there was a puzzled look on her face.

"What is it, Rae?" Steve's voice was gentle.

"I can't remember. Steve, what happened when I came outside?"

"You collapsed. Amanda saw you first and rushed over to you. You said that Jesse had a punctured lung and that you had shot Levington. I was allowed to take over after that." He smiled at her.

Dr. Dobson got up and walked over to her. "How do you feel about him now? You said that you were scared of him before, are you still scared?"

Rae took a breath. "Yes, I'm still scared of him," she paused, "but, I beat him, I didn't kill him, he will get his punishment." A smile spread over her battered face. "I beat him. I won!" Once again the release that she felt was almost overwhelming. She felt two tears of relief escape and run down her cheeks, but it didn't matter, nothing mattered quite so much any more.

"You've been talking for over two hours. Did you realise that?" She shook her head. "I think it is time that I took my leave. I know you probably hate me right now, but trust me, you will feel better for what you have achieved tonight."

"I'm sorry that I ran away, I just couldn't tell you that last bit first. I needed to tell it to somebody that I thought would understand."

"Oh, I understand, Detective, but you can help me to understand a little more the next time we meet. I believe we have an appointment on Monday morning? I'll see you at about eight thirty if that is still convenient." Rae nodded and with that he left her and Steve alone.

Steve pressed the buzzer. "Nurse, could you get Dr. Collins up here please?"

"I'm sorry, Sir, Dr. Collins isn't on duty at present."

"Could you get my father up here then?" She smiled and went over to her station. He sat in the chair by the bed. "Rae, look at me. Did he do anything to you that you haven't told anybody about?"

"No, Steve, he tried, but I stopped him, twice, I stopped him." Mark came into the room.

"Steve?"

"Could you give Rae something to help her to sleep, dad?

"Of course, have you finished speaking to Dr. Dobson?"

"Yes, for now I have." She watched Mark administer her sedative. He checked her face and felt the fingers of her injured hand.

"Do you want me to check your hand for you, Rae?"

"No, Mark, I'll be ok." Rae gave him a sleepy smile.

"Well, I think you should have Dr. Collins take a look at that in the morning. Good night, Rae." Mark kissed her gently on the forehead and then made a couple of notes on her chart.

Steve took her hand in his as he had earlier in the day.

She smiled over at him. "Thank you, Steve." Her eyes slowly closed, and her breathing became deep and even. Steve put her hand back down on the bed covers. He kissed her on her forehead. He would tell her tomorrow about his time spent with her son and the things that he had found at Levington's place after she had left. As he walked back down the hallway towards Jesse's room he realised that he was bone numbingly tired himself. He looked in on Jesse and saw that the cot he had asked for had been put up. It had taken Amanda and him twenty minutes to get his father to agree to go home at the end of his shift. Steve lay down gratefully. He looked over at Jesse and then he shut his eyes. It had been quite a day.