Thoughts

Chapter 8 - Gone Forever

Disclaimer - I don't own DBZ.

Thanks for everyone who reviewed! I have two different ideas of how this story will end, one being shorter than the other. I don't know which one I'll use yet though, so you'll just have to keep on reading!

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As Gohan was flying, he felt his Kaasan's ki below him. She was not at home, and was alone. Gohan decided to give her a proper goodbye, so he slowly began to descend.

As he landed on the ground, many thoughts and emotions started to rush through his mind, as if he had been asleep for the past couple of days. He felt guilt, loneliness, remorse over all the things he had donee, but loneliness was the strongest. As he saw his Kaasan, he was tempted to shout out to her, to tell her that he was home. But he was still not in control of himself, and his emotions and thoughts disappeared just as suddenly as they had appeared.

ChiChi tensed when she heard something land on the ground behind her. She slowly turned around and saw Gohan standing there. She began to smile happily as joy spread through her and managed to say, "Go"

Gohan avoided her glance and looked at the ground.

ChiChi knew that he had been looking at her, but why would he avoid her? She then saw his face and saw that it was hard and serious, and that he didn't seem to be happy at all. He also looked completely different, but ChiChi felt as if she had seen him like this before. She traced back and remembered that it was how he had looked when she had seen him on Baba's crystal ball.

She gasped, and then said softly, "Gohan, you came home. Will you be staying?"

Gohan's eyes looked at her, aqua meeting onyx. He sighed and said, but with hardly any emotion, "Iie. I came to say goodbye."

Tears formed in ChiChi's eyes. Why did Gohan want to leave? "But Gohan-chan, why?"

"The reason why I'm leaving is so that I can take my own life. If I keep on living, more people will suffer because of me, including you, Okaasan."

ChiChi shook her head and cried, "Iie, that's not true Gohan! I will suffer even greatly if you die, I don't want you to!"

Gohan shrugged and replied, "You have Goten now. I'm sure that he will be a much better son than I was."

ChiChi was speechless, and continued to shake her head.

Now! Leave now baka, otherwise you'll never be able to! With that thought, Gohan turned to leave, but felt his Kaasan's hand on his shoulder.

ChiChi was talking between sobs now, "Please! Gohan-chan, don't go! No one will ever be able to replace you, not even Goten-chan. You are my first son, and I won't let you go and kill yourself!"

Finally, some emotion came into Gohan's voice, "Please, don't Okaasan"

ChiChi then grabbed Gohan in a hug crying, "Don't go Gohan! Don't go!"

Memories of Cell flooded back to Gohan. That horrible voice

Gohan yelped as Cell grabbed him in a bear hug.

Cell was laughing, laughing evilly. He hugs Gohan tighter and tighter, laughing the whole time, causing Gohan to howl in pain. Gohan screams, kicks, squirms, but he is defenceless.

Cell, still laughing says, "What's wrong? Doesn't it hurt? Get mad, then. You're not going to die like this, are you?"

Cell tightens his grip even more, and Gohan continues to scream. He is in so much pain, but can't do anything about it.

Cell then says, "Come on, don't be shy. Your bones will break soon! There's no reason why you should endure this pain instead of fighting with me."

Gohan continues to scream as he feels that his bones are breaking. He thrashes about more violently, but it still doesn't help.

"Get mad. Come on. It hurts You hate me, don't you?"

Gohan continues to scream, as Cell tightens his grip even more

Gohan screamed and pulled away from his Kaasan's grip. ChiChi looked at him with tears flowing down her cheeks, confused and startled.

"Get away from me!" Gohan screamed as he backed away from his Kaasan.

"Gohan, what's wrong?! It's me, Okaasan!"

Gohan stood still for a moment, then regained his senses. His expression turned bleak again and he apologised, "Gomen Okaasan. I think that I better go now. Please, don't try to stop me."

ChiChi ran towards her son and grabbed his gi. She quickly let go when she noticed how much blood covered it, and stared at her hand, which was also covered with blood. She then ignored it as Gohan began to rise into the sky, and grabbed his leg.

Gohan looked down and said, "Okaasan, let go!"

"Iie Gohan-chan, don't go!"

"Please, Okaasan!"

"Iie Gohan! Don't"

Gohan kicked his Kaasan strongly, and she was sent crashing into the trees.

Something snapped inside Gohan, and he quickly rushed to where his Kaasan lay. She was unconscious, and blood was flowing from her nose and mouth.

Gohan's eyes widened in terror and he shook her begging, "Okaasan! Please, wake up, please!"

His Kaasan began to stir, her eyes fluttering. When she opened her eyes fully and saw Gohan crouching over her, she pushed him away and screamed, "Don't hurt me! Stay away!"

Gohan blinked in surprise. His Kaasan was slowly backing away from him, until she was blocked by a fallen tree.

Gohan stepped forward, but ChiChi screamed again and started to cry.

Then Gohan began to remember all the things that he had done when he had been out of control. Ve Vegeta! I almost killed him! And Piccolo-san too, oh, I can't believe I did that, what was I thinking?! And Kaasan I kicked Kaasan! I I can't stay here any longer, I have to go now!

Tears also started to form in Gohan's eyes, tears from guilt. He sobbed, "Gomen nasai, Okaasan! I know now though, that I will never be able to forgive myself for all the pain and suffering that I have caused you. I will leave you, and you can be with Goten. Sayonara!"

ChiChi saw the guilt in her son's eyes form into crystal tears. "Gohan"

Gohan soared above the treetops. He looked at his Kaasan for the last time, his tears streaming down his face. With a burst of ki, he then flew away.

ChiChi felt a warm, wet drop on her hand. She looked down at it. It was one of Gohan's tears

Instead of calling his name for him to come back, ChiChi burst into tears, knowing that her son was gone forever.

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*Sniff* Another sad chappie. I really do torture Gohan, but I guess most Gohan Fans do. I wonder why that is exactly