"For the LAST FREAKIN' TIME, Trepe, I said I'm sorry!"

"SORRY? IS THAT ALL YOU HAVE TO SAY? THAT YOU'RE SORRY?"

"Like I keep TELLING YOU, WOMAN, it was an ACCADENT!"

"RIGHT, the boat hit a BIG WAVE, causing your hand to LATCH ONTO MY CHEST!"

"WELL I CERTAINLY WOULDN'T DO IT ON PURPOSE! I think you ENJOYED IT! After all, when was the last time you got a guy DRUNK ENOUGH to get laid?"

"I GET LAID JUST AS OFTEN AS I WANT TO, AND IT'S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS WHEN I DO OR DON'T GET LAID!"

"Oh, what, is Xu denying you sex or something?"

"What are you implying!"

"Hey, I call 'em as I see 'em!"

"Oh ya? Well I guess then you'll call out THIS!"

The distinct sound of somebody getting kicked in the groin could reach the Captain's ears. With a sigh, he popped in another Advil.

"Oh, SORRY! The boat rocked REALLY HARD, and my foot slipped!!!!!!!"

"BITCH!"

"UNIC!"

"LESBO!"

"MELON RAPER!"

The Captain winced, and popped in another few pills. Ever since they left Centra, they had been at it like this. And it showed no sign of stopping...

"HELL WHORE!"

"CHOCOBO SCREWER!!"

No sign at all.........

The Captain hoped that a sudden lightning bolt would strike him.

"SHE-MALE!"

"DICKLESS WONDER!"

...............Right now.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Quistis and Seifer were glaring at each other as the ship docked.

"Suck my dick." Seifer growled, voice sore from shouting for hours.

"Sorry, I don't have a microscope on me to find it." Quistis grumbled back, voice equally as sore.

The ship captain almost shoved them off the boat as he "escorted" them off. Seifer walked over to the edge of the dock, glaring sullenly at the water. Suddenly, he turned to face Quistis.

"You know you find me irresistible." He purred, his most charming smile on his lips.

".... Excuse me?" Quistis asked, eyebrow twitching.

"You've wanted to jump my dead sexy bones ever since you laid eyes on me." Seifer continued, winking at Quistis. Quistis glared at him. Then, without warning, her expression changed.

She started walking towards Seifer, licking her lips, a hungry look in her clear blue eyes. Seifer swallowed. Hard. Seifer could only gape as Quistis stopped, inches away from him. She traced patterns on his chest, sliding her hand underneath his shirt, feeling his rock hard abs. She withdrew her hands, lightly placing them on his shoulders. Her eyes locked with Seifer's, she slowing began moving in, stopping only when her face was just inches from his.

Seifer swallowed again. He could feel her hot, sweet breath on his cheek. Quistis raised herself up on her tippy-toes. As her lips brushed ever-so lightly against his, she rested her hands harder on his shoulders....

Then shoved with all of her might.

With a squeak, Seifer toppled into the cold ocean below. He rose to the surface, arms thrashing, sputtering indignantly as Quistis' knees gave out in her mirth. She sat there, laughing so hard tears were streaking down her cheeks, listening to the obscenities Seifer was muttering as he swam towards the ladder the dock had, just in case somebody fell into the waters.

"Very FREAKIN' FUNNY!!" Seifer roared, approaching Quistis, who couldn't seem to breath because of the laughter. Seifer took off his black tee shirt, now soaking wet, and wrung it out over Quistis. She shrieked as the water hit her, sitting up and swearing.

"Serves you right!"

"Asshole!"

"Fuck Stain!"

Quistis stomped off in the direction of the Garden.

Seifer realized it was going to be a long trip...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

People were shooting Quistis and Seifer sidelong glances, and not because the two seemed to be uttering every insult in the book at each other. People moved out of their way to avoid coming near Seifer, and Quistis stopped her insults long enough to point this out to Seifer.

"Welcome to my world." He grumbled, watching a woman yank her protesting child across the street, telling her to avoid the 'bad bad man.' News of his arrival spread like wildfire across the town. It was definitely going to be a long trip...

~~~~~~~~~

"Ok, Seifer, here's the deal. We are going to remain as inconspicuous as possible. We are to go STRAIGHT to my room, where I will pack my things and leave a short note of resignation. We will then set off to FH, where the new orphanage is currently docked. In and out, as soon as possible. Got it?"

"What if I have to pee?"

"... Then wet your pants. We aren't stopping."

Seifer faked a pout. "Ok, whatever you say... cumbag...."

Quistis stuck her tongue out at Seifer.

"Hey, don't stick it out unless you intend to use it!" Seifer said with a lopsided grin. Quistis kicked him in the shins.

They approached the Garden, and managed to slip in unnoticed. Most of the students were off in other towns. It was the weekend after all. It was lunchtime to boot, so anybody who would still be at the garden, would be eating. Quistis prayed her luck would continue as she dragged the blonde man into her room. After threatening his manhood, Quistis got Seifer to pack her clothes in a suitcase as she wrote out a short letter of resignation, careful not to disclose too much information about her destination.

She heard a low whistle behind her, and she whirled around in time to see Seifer holding up a white sheer lace corset, complete with garter straps and white stockings. With a blush and a deadly glare she banished Seifer from her underwear drawer, and threw in the rest of her clothes. Then, she cleared out her closet, leaving only her SeeD uniform hanging up.

"You know, dear instructor, my clothes are STILL damp." Seifer pouted, fingering his jeans lightly with a frown. "I will get you for your little stunt you pulled, you know."

Quistis snorted, and zipped her suitcase shut. That done, Quistis shoved Seifer out of her room and walked out, leaving the door open. Somebody was bound to notice the open door, and would find the letter inside.

"There," Quistis said, brusquely walking down the hall, dragging Seifer, "that wasn't so hard, was it?"

She spoke too soon. A young SeeD cadet, overburdened with loads of paperwork, accidentally bumped into Seifer. With a screech she fell into the fountain, thrashing and continuing to scream at the top of her lungs. Quistis managed a few choice words before possibly every SeeD member in the Garden showed up around the pair to investigate the screams.

And of course, all they saw was a screaming girl in the fountain and Seifer Almsy standing there.

"Hey, it's that bastard traitor!" One shouted, pointing at Seifer.

"He pushed Nadine into the fountain!"

"He's trying to kill her!"

Seifer blinked a few times, before his temper got the best of him. "If you people would learn to WALK in your little school, maybe she wouldn't have TRIPPED in!"

Before the angry mob of SeeDs could reply, a commanding voice cut through them.

"What is going on here!"

The crowd parted to allow Squall Lionheart, headmaster of the school, to the center of the mess. Quistis moaned a few more choice words, pinching her nose bridge. Squall silently viewed the girl sitting quietly in the pool, his swearing instructor, and Seifer standing glaring at the crowd.

".... Seifer." Squall greeted, nodding his head.

".... Squall." Seifer replied, eyebrow raised.

"Seifer, I'd like you to meet the HEADMASTER of the garden." Quistis said, trying to get her point across to the blonde man. But it was lost on him.

"That chick still got you whipped, puberty boy?" Seifer asked, crossing his arms.

"... I married her." Squall replied, voice low and deadly.

"WELL Squall, nice to run into you, look at the time! Gotta go byeeeeeeeeee!" Quistis broke in, grabbing Seifer and dragging him through the crowd.

"HOLD it!" Squall commanded. Quistis swore. Again.

"My office. Now." Squall said, walking past the pair and heading towards the lift.

Seifer and Quistis looked at one another, and dejectedly followed the brunette man.

A long trip indeed.

"Slutt."

"Fudgepacker."

A long trip indeed...

----------------------------------------------------------------



Short, I know, and I keep on saying how much I hate author's notes and here I am making another one. XP Thanks for all the great reviews! Hey, try to remember these insults. They work great ^^