Chapter Two: A Meaty Welcome...Er, Watery Welcome...Wait, What?

"Dib, Zim and I have some business to take care of. I'll MEAT you in a minute!" they laughed some more, and then she caught up with Zim. In a frantic whisper, she exclaimed, "What are you DOING, Zim? You'll ruin everything!"

"I just have a little present to give you as a welcome to the planet that will soon be mine." From behind, he drew out a squirt gun.

"What is that?"

"Your present." He squirted her in the face, causing great pain for her. Mel screamed out, and Dib came over to see what the matter was.

"Zim!" he called out, "What is that stuff, Zim?! Acid?!"

"Nope. Just some of your normal, typical Earth water."

"Water? Then that means she's a, a, a -"

"Yes, Dib, I'm an alien. Just like he is." She collapsed, and he gaped at her. Once again, he'd been fooled. (You'd think by now he'd catch on a little.)

"I'd better get her to my laboratory before she dies. I think I can help her."

"Wait, I'm going with you. I want to know why she's here."

"Not a chance, Dib-monkey."

"No...Zim...let him come...or I'll report you." The two carried her into a bathroom stall, where Zim activated a device to take them to his base. In the process, he accidentally dropped Mel on Dib's foot, causing him to rebuke the alien in a most abrasive manner. After all this, he stepped on Zim's foot, but just when they were about to start a full-out fistfight, they found themselves in his lab.

Zim wiped her face with a dry cloth, while Dib looked at all the equipment there was to be seen. "The only reason you're here, filthy human, is to make sure that Mel doesn't die! The Tallest would kill me for sure!"

"No, the reason I'm here is because she wants me here."

"And the reason she wants you here is to help keep her alive!"

"How would you know?"

"Because...I just know."

"I don't believe you."

"I know you don't." There was a long pause as they heard the labored breathing of Mel with the aid of several advanced tools.

"I just can't believe it...I really thought she was into the paranormal...she told me she was fascinated with aliens, and intrigued by ghosts. I didn't know she was on your side...."

"On my side? You joke, do you not?"

"No. Isn't she?"

"Of course not! She's staying with me, but she's the most annoying little pest I've ever met. I can't see why she's even an invader!"

"Actually, I found her quite likeable."

"Well, she's okay, but when she's laughing her head off at some...anime...at one o'clock in the morning, she's not so enjoyable then. And that whole thing with the remote was horrible..." Dib cocked an eyebrow. "Well, last night, she was flipping through the channels, and stopped at that stupid show you like so much, when -"

"You mean Mysterious Mysteries?"

"Yes, yes, whatever it's called. She turned to that, then blew up at me when I turned the television off. I can't argue with her tastes, either, because she's my superior..." Zim emphasized the word 'superior' with utter revulsion.

"You mean...she really watches it?"

"Yes. I still can't understand why she believes in all those stupid things, anyway. She's supposed to be a civilized Irken, for the love of Irk!"

"Then she wasn't lying? She was just telling me the truth?"

"I suppose so. Now, be gone with you."

"Mel's not even conscious yet!"

"Oh, yes, I forgot about her."

"Real great friend."

"Who says I'm her friend? Just because I'm ordered to take her in, doesn't mean she's my friend. I don't even like the annoying little worm."

"Zim?" It was Mel. She was awake, and had heard. "I'm just a...a worm? An annoying little worm? Not a friend or acquaintance of any kind? I'm sorry to have bothered you. I'll go pack my bags." She fled up to her room, crying.

"Jerk."

"Why are you suddenly involved, stinkbeast human?"

"Because the girl you just insulted has some problem, and needs sensitivity. Not someone like YOU."

"Hey, she was being a jerk to me!"

"And you think that gives you the right to try to kill her with water, and then insult her?"

"I wasn't trying to kill her! I just wanted to play a prank on her!"

"Just stay away from her."

"She likes pranks! Whenever we were in skool, she'd always play jokes on me, and I'd play jokes on her! It was a game! She liked it!" Dib ran after the new invader and stopped her.

"What's wrong?" Silence. "Mel, what's wrong with you? Why won't you answer me? Invader Mel?" Calling her by her title got her attention. She uttered one word:

"Miyuki?"