Disclaimer, header etc. in part 1.
~~*~~
With Dreams Untold (7/7)
by Eve (little_grey_woman42@yahoo.de)
~~*~~
He was still in that position when she found him.
She'd already been on the parking lot when she noticed that she had left her car keys behind. She knew that there really was a first time for everything when she looked at the looming building before her and realised that she had been glad to get out of the office and actually dreaded to go back inside.
Somehow work just wasn't the same without Grissom.
She missed him.
It was as simple and at the same time complicated as that. She missed him. Missed his quirks, his quick mind, the challenges he provided, missed his presence beside her. Even when they weren't working together on a case, they passed each other during their shifts in the hallways and exchanged a few words or sometimes just a glance. Those were the small things she'd found herself looking forward to for quite some time now each day she woke up and got ready for work.
So when she spotted him sitting huddled on the floor, she didn't know what to think. He wasn't supposed to be back until the day after tomorrow, was supposed to be on vacation, relaxing, not sitting there like ... like that.
Even though she knew she would miss him, she'd actually been glad to hear his announcement two weeks ago that he would take a few days off, take some personal time. He hadn't been himself lately, appeared to be more distant than ever and she'd assumed that a break would be just the right thing for him.
Sara would have taken a few days off herself if there wasn't so much work to do. One gruesome case solved and locked away into that one corner of her mind into which she never wanted to look again, there was always another one just around the bend, another case that needed her attention, another vic she soon felt obliged to.
But seeing him like that she forgot her own weariness at once and quickly closed the door behind her.
She approached him slowly, cautiously, lines of worry marring her face. When he didn't react to her approach, she reached out and said: "Grissom?" But before her hand was able touch his shoulder his head jerked up and the expression on his face caused her to pull her outstretched hand back immediately.
What the hell had happened to him?
"Sara," she barely heard him say with a strained voice, heard him say her name it as if he had to fight hard in order just to form the two syllables.
"What's wrong?" she asked him gently and squatted down besides him.
She saw his gaze flicker from her face to her hands then back again to her face.
He seemed to search for something. Myriad contradicting emotions flickered in quick succession over his features, then relief, sadness, resignation. It was the resignation in his gaze that scared her most. That and the feeling that something was missing, something essential.
She shuddered.
But it was over as quickly as it had started and when she blinked, his face was as expressionless as it had been before and she wondered whether she'd actually seen anything at all. She saw him close his eyes and lean back against the locker, noticed him wince shortly when his head came in contact with the hard surface.
"Gris?" she implored, not only wanting to know what had happened but also feeling the urge, the need for him to acknowledge that he was still ... him.
"I ... I thought you were already gone," he said quietly and swallowed, his eyes still closed.
"Yeah, well I've forgotten something I couldn't leave without and came back to pick it up," she said and looked at him, willing him to return her gaze.
It seemed to work because his eyes immediately snapped open and he silently gazed at her. Not for the first time she wondered what he saw when he looked at her that way.
She felt the sudden shift in him before she watched his eyes harden, saw him retreat back to that place where he'd been going to more and more often during the past couple of weeks. To that place where she couldn't seem to be able to reach him no matter how hard she tried.
"I have to go," he informed her flatly and moved to get up from his place on the floor. She looked at him incredulously and stopped his movement by laying a hand on his arm.
"You're not serious, are you? You can't just get up and leave me here without -"
Again she was met with a look she couldn't quite place.
"Look," she tried to reason with him, her grasp on his arm tightening involuntarily, "I just want to know what's wrong. And don't tell me it's nothing because obviously there *is* something wrong or you wouldn't be sitting here like that." When he didn't react she added pleadingly: "Talk to me. Please."
He shrugged her hand off his arm and struggled to his feet. "You don't understand, I -"
She quickly stood up as well and felt her confusion and worry turn into anger as she interrupted him: "Yes, I don't understand it. I don't understand what's happening to you, why you are closing yourself off from me, from everybody, why -"
She suddenly stopped when she heard a quiet "thud" as something heavy hit the floor.
It must have fallen out of the pocket of his trousers but Grissom didn't seem to notice. He kept staring at her and only followed her gaze when she looked down at the item that rolled towards her. It finally came to a halt right in front of her feet. She tilted her head and frowned, unable to identify the object from her perspective. Sara was about to reach down in order to pick it up when she heard a choked sound coming from the man in front of her.
She looked up soon enough and saw him bend down, observed how he carefully, almost tenderly picked the red thing up and held it in his open palm. He drew in a shuddered breath and closed his hand around the oval object, holding on to it with dear life.
"What is it, Grissom?" she asked, her anger already leaving her as quickly as it had appeared.
He slowly tilted his head up and calmly met her eyes.
She saw that he had to blink a few times in order to focus on her but when he finally did she felt herself completely drawn in by the intensity of his gaze. Grissom's blue eyes shone and he looked at her openly, his guard completely down. Her throat constricted painfully and her pulse speeded up when she realised the emotions they were revealing. They washed over her and she felt them engulf her like a blanket, felt warm and secure and loved.
Sara smiled.
And when she saw something twinkle brightly in his eyes, she suddenly knew what had been missing.
Hope.
~~*~~
~~*~~
With Dreams Untold (7/7)
by Eve (little_grey_woman42@yahoo.de)
~~*~~
He was still in that position when she found him.
She'd already been on the parking lot when she noticed that she had left her car keys behind. She knew that there really was a first time for everything when she looked at the looming building before her and realised that she had been glad to get out of the office and actually dreaded to go back inside.
Somehow work just wasn't the same without Grissom.
She missed him.
It was as simple and at the same time complicated as that. She missed him. Missed his quirks, his quick mind, the challenges he provided, missed his presence beside her. Even when they weren't working together on a case, they passed each other during their shifts in the hallways and exchanged a few words or sometimes just a glance. Those were the small things she'd found herself looking forward to for quite some time now each day she woke up and got ready for work.
So when she spotted him sitting huddled on the floor, she didn't know what to think. He wasn't supposed to be back until the day after tomorrow, was supposed to be on vacation, relaxing, not sitting there like ... like that.
Even though she knew she would miss him, she'd actually been glad to hear his announcement two weeks ago that he would take a few days off, take some personal time. He hadn't been himself lately, appeared to be more distant than ever and she'd assumed that a break would be just the right thing for him.
Sara would have taken a few days off herself if there wasn't so much work to do. One gruesome case solved and locked away into that one corner of her mind into which she never wanted to look again, there was always another one just around the bend, another case that needed her attention, another vic she soon felt obliged to.
But seeing him like that she forgot her own weariness at once and quickly closed the door behind her.
She approached him slowly, cautiously, lines of worry marring her face. When he didn't react to her approach, she reached out and said: "Grissom?" But before her hand was able touch his shoulder his head jerked up and the expression on his face caused her to pull her outstretched hand back immediately.
What the hell had happened to him?
"Sara," she barely heard him say with a strained voice, heard him say her name it as if he had to fight hard in order just to form the two syllables.
"What's wrong?" she asked him gently and squatted down besides him.
She saw his gaze flicker from her face to her hands then back again to her face.
He seemed to search for something. Myriad contradicting emotions flickered in quick succession over his features, then relief, sadness, resignation. It was the resignation in his gaze that scared her most. That and the feeling that something was missing, something essential.
She shuddered.
But it was over as quickly as it had started and when she blinked, his face was as expressionless as it had been before and she wondered whether she'd actually seen anything at all. She saw him close his eyes and lean back against the locker, noticed him wince shortly when his head came in contact with the hard surface.
"Gris?" she implored, not only wanting to know what had happened but also feeling the urge, the need for him to acknowledge that he was still ... him.
"I ... I thought you were already gone," he said quietly and swallowed, his eyes still closed.
"Yeah, well I've forgotten something I couldn't leave without and came back to pick it up," she said and looked at him, willing him to return her gaze.
It seemed to work because his eyes immediately snapped open and he silently gazed at her. Not for the first time she wondered what he saw when he looked at her that way.
She felt the sudden shift in him before she watched his eyes harden, saw him retreat back to that place where he'd been going to more and more often during the past couple of weeks. To that place where she couldn't seem to be able to reach him no matter how hard she tried.
"I have to go," he informed her flatly and moved to get up from his place on the floor. She looked at him incredulously and stopped his movement by laying a hand on his arm.
"You're not serious, are you? You can't just get up and leave me here without -"
Again she was met with a look she couldn't quite place.
"Look," she tried to reason with him, her grasp on his arm tightening involuntarily, "I just want to know what's wrong. And don't tell me it's nothing because obviously there *is* something wrong or you wouldn't be sitting here like that." When he didn't react she added pleadingly: "Talk to me. Please."
He shrugged her hand off his arm and struggled to his feet. "You don't understand, I -"
She quickly stood up as well and felt her confusion and worry turn into anger as she interrupted him: "Yes, I don't understand it. I don't understand what's happening to you, why you are closing yourself off from me, from everybody, why -"
She suddenly stopped when she heard a quiet "thud" as something heavy hit the floor.
It must have fallen out of the pocket of his trousers but Grissom didn't seem to notice. He kept staring at her and only followed her gaze when she looked down at the item that rolled towards her. It finally came to a halt right in front of her feet. She tilted her head and frowned, unable to identify the object from her perspective. Sara was about to reach down in order to pick it up when she heard a choked sound coming from the man in front of her.
She looked up soon enough and saw him bend down, observed how he carefully, almost tenderly picked the red thing up and held it in his open palm. He drew in a shuddered breath and closed his hand around the oval object, holding on to it with dear life.
"What is it, Grissom?" she asked, her anger already leaving her as quickly as it had appeared.
He slowly tilted his head up and calmly met her eyes.
She saw that he had to blink a few times in order to focus on her but when he finally did she felt herself completely drawn in by the intensity of his gaze. Grissom's blue eyes shone and he looked at her openly, his guard completely down. Her throat constricted painfully and her pulse speeded up when she realised the emotions they were revealing. They washed over her and she felt them engulf her like a blanket, felt warm and secure and loved.
Sara smiled.
And when she saw something twinkle brightly in his eyes, she suddenly knew what had been missing.
Hope.
~~*~~
