The lights went out for a moment, and when they came back up, the stage was empty, except for Fred and George Weasley.
"The wise Sir Hermione was the first to join King Harry's Knights of the Round Table, but other illustrious names were soon to follow." Fred announced. George took over with, "Sir Ronsalot, the brave," They both snicker, Ron, behind the scenes, yells, "Hey!" "Sir Seamus, the pure, and Sir Neville, the-not-quite-so-brave-as-Sir-Ronsalot, who had nearly fought the Dragon of Angnor, who had nearly stood up to the vicious Chicken of Bristol, and who had personally wet himself at the Battle of Badon Hill, and the aptly named, Sir Not-appearing-in-this-play."
Fred continued where his twin left off. "Together they formed a band whose named and deeds were to be retold throughout the centuries."
A pause, then simultaneously,
"The Knights of the Round Table!"
The lights went out, and when they came back up, the scene was of rolling countryside with a model of Hogwarts in the distance. King Harry, the four Knights, Concorde, Draco and a few seventh year extras acting as squires and pack horses 'ride' across the stage towards the castle. Harry and Hermione were having a conversation as they 'rode'.
"And that is how we know the Earth to be banana shaped." Hermione said to her liege.
"This new learning amazes me, Sir Hermione." Harry said, amazed. "Explain again how sheep's bladders may be employed to prevent earthquakes."
"Certainly sir."
Sir Ronsalot stopped and pointed to the castle. "Look, my liege!" Trumpets play in the background.
Harry looks. "Hogwarts!" Sir Seamus and Sir Ronsalot echo, "Hogwarts!"
Draco sneers. "It's only a model."
Harry turns to Draco. "Shh!" Then, turning back to the castle, he said, "Knights, I bid you welcome to your new home. Let us ride... to... Hogwarts."
The lights go out briefly so people can move, and the scene can change. As it changes, music starts playing in the background. The lights come back on, and the scene is a duplicate of the Great Hall. Several miscellaneous seventh years are in a line on the head table. They start singing.
"We're Knights of the Round Table.
We dance whene'er we're able.
We do routines and chorus scenes
With footwork impeccable.
We dine well here in Camelot.
We eat ham and jam and spam a lot."
The seventh years start dancing around the room.
"We're Knights of the Round Table.
Our shows are formidable,
But many times we're given rhymes
That are quite unsingable.
We're opera mad in Camelot.
We sing from the diaphragm a lot."
A previously unlit corner of the stage lit, while the rest went dark. It was an exact copy of the Dungeons. Filch was hanging from the wall by his wrists, clapping his hands. The lighting reversed, and the knights continued singing.
"In war we're tough and able,
Quite indefatigable.
Between our quests we sequin vests and impersonate Clark Gable.
It's a busy life in Camelot."
Oliver Wood stepped out onto the stage and sang,
"I have to push the pram a lot."
The lights went out, and the music wound down. When the lights came back up, and the rolling countryside was back, complete with everyone from the pre-song scene. Harry was saying,
"Well, on second thought, let's not go to Hogwarts. It is a silly place."