***Commercial Break*** Narrator: Ever wonder if there is a racehorse faster than yours? Timmy: ::moves highly close to camera:: ::bangs nose on screen:: ::curses, mother heard in background scolding:: FINE MOM!!! .. Zoom, zoom! ::everyone from harvest moon comes out dancing in a congo line singing the scary "zoom,zoom" song::

*****************

Bob: Are your chickens trapping you in the corner of a fence, and you can get out? Call this number now!! ::points at number at the bottom of screen:: ::reads outloud for all those illiterate people that are reading this:: 1-800-WE-DONT-CARE and for those who can't read the little letters on the phone buttons, also 1-800-93-3668-2273 ::cheesy smile::

***End Commercial Break***

Liz: AND WELCOME TO THIS CRAZY SHOW THAT I HAVEN'T WRITTEN IN FOREVER. I believe I've forgotten how to spell. Lindsay.

Lindsay: Yes.?

Liz: Take over

Lindsay: ::starts dancing:: Hey Burrito! ::stares at crowd expectantly:: COME ON, Hey Burrito!

Crowd: ::uncertainly:: hey burrito.

Lindsay: Mmm yeah burrito

Crowd: mmm yeah burrito. ::looks at Lindsay as if she's lost it::

Lindsay: Taco Bell, Taco Bell

Crowd: ::becoming more comfortable:: Taco Bell, Taco Bell

Lindsay: Guacamole, Cinnamon twist!!!

Crowd: Guacamole, Cinnamon twist!!!

Lindsay: ::small voice:: hey burrito

Crowd: ::small voice:: hey burrito

Lindsay: ::small voice:: mmm yeah burrito

Crowd: ::small voice:: mmm yeah burrito

Lindsay: ::small voice:: taco bell, taco bell

Crowd: ::small voice:: taco bell, taco bell

Lindsay ::small voice:: guacamole, cinnamon twist

Crowd: ::small voice:: guacamole, cinnamon twist

Lindsay: HEY BURRITO!!!!

Crowd: HEY BURRITO!!!!

Lindsay: MMM YEAH BURRITO!!!!

Crowd: MMM YEAH BURRITO!!!!

Lindsay: TACO BELL, TACO BELL!!!!

Crowd: TACO BELL, TACO BELL!!!!

Lindsay: GUACAMOLE, CINNAMON TWIST!!!!

Crowd: GUACAMOLE, CINNAMON TWIST!!!!

Lindsay: Alright! Let's hear it for. . .GO TEAM!! ::does a cheerleading jump::

Liz: ::stares at Lindsay in horror:: ::turns at stares at electrical outlet in horror::

Lindsay: Liz.?

Liz: THEY'RE INVADING THEY'RE INVADING

Lindsay: I KNEW IT!! THE CLEAR RIBBONS ARE AT IT AGAIN!! GET THEM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

::guys with nets jump out from nowhere and chase "clear ribbons" around with "clear nets"::

Guy 1: YEAH I GOT ONE

Guy 2: I GOT TWO

Guy 3: I GOT THEM ALLLLLLLLLLLLL ::all guys disappear::

Liz: I guess it's time to bring out the guests.. Well, who's left Lindsay?

Lindsay: Yeh think? Only Timmy and Jack ::sniffle:: looks like we'll have to end this soon ::breaks down into inconsolable tears::

Liz: Chill girl.. COME ON IN TIMMY AND JAAAAACK

Timmy: CAW CAW CAW ::runs around terrorizing random audience members:: CAW CAW CAW ::sits on somebody's lap::

Jack: ::walks on stage with his hair at odd angles, his shirt stained with what appears to be apple juice:: SAVE ME, SAVE ME FROM THIS TERROR!!!

Timmy: HEY, YOU SPILT MY APPLE JUICE

Jack: ::eyes widen in horror:: SAVE MEEEEEEE

Timmy: OOOOOOH well.

Liz: ::to Lindsay:: What'd ya just say?

Lindsay: What??? I CAN'T PUT THE CHICKEN IN MY BACKPACK.NOOOO WE CAN'T TAKE THEM TO THE HOMEPLANET LIZ, WE CAN'T, THERE'S NO WAY TO SMUGGLE THEM, GOD DOESN'T WANT THEM THERE ::gasp:: God?

Liz: No, just call me Liz ::calmly ushers the hyper-active Timmy into a trash can and closes the lid, promptly placing him outside the studio doors::

Lindsay: Jaaaaaack, guess what?

Jack: . what?

Lindsay: I PRETEND TO BE YOU SOMETIMES AND RUN AROUND ON MY LITTLE FIELD AND GO, 'HEY GWEN' ::waves at invisible cow:: 'HEY DIA' ::waves at invisible cow:: 'HEYGINA!' ::waves at invisible cow:: 'HEY LIZZIE!' ::waves at invisible chicken::

Liz: Why am I a chicken?

Lindsay: . ::hides in corner:: I need help. WITH MY 'TATOES!!

Jack:::suddenly arrogant:: Why, I'm excellent with ::quote thing with hands:: "'Tatoes"

Lindsay: ::swoons:: Show me your ways great one.

Liz: OOOOOOOOOKAAAAAAY ::backs away slowly:: I guess that's that.. I am one scared host. wooooow.. I've actually been scared of Lindsay. or anyone else. do freakier people exist in the world? Hmmmm ::ponders::

Lindsay: ::recovers:: THAT'S ALL FOLKS ::tries best imitation of porky pig::

Well. ahem, that was interesting, not our best work by far, we haven't had the most caffeine that we could possibly have. but stay tuned ANYWAY for the very very last chapter. it's gonna be a big reunion and we hope it's better than this ::ahem:: CRAP!! So anyway. tune in hehehehe