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"Okay, I've got you beat," Riley said, sitting up with determination. "There's no way you'll guess this on."
"I'm ready," Reid assured, sitting across from her in a booth at a diner two blocks down from the café.
"Which episode did Dr. McCoy say, 'I'm a doctor, not a tailor, damnit?'"
Reid sat back. Now this one, he really had to think. And across the table, Riley glowing with determination, biting her lip in triumph was driving him crazy, distracting him completely. His brain wasn't working. He had to have heard that, he couldn't let her win.
"Doo doo doo doo, doo doo doo," Riley sang the theme to Jeopardy, making the process even more difficult.
"Alright," he said, throwing his hands up into the air. "You got me, I don't know that one. Which episode is it?"
"It was a trick a question, it was on an episode of SNL Star Trek parody from the 1970s. Dan Ankryod played McCoy."
"You cheated!" He cried.
"That's not cheating! You didn't say it had to be the official show!"
"Fine! If you can only win by cheating, then fine! The genius will let you win!"
"Don't do me any favors, little one!" She flicked a leftover French fry at him. "You're just sore because I know something you don't!"
"Believe it or not, I don't know everything!" Reid said, "Despite what my entire team, especially my best friend, tells me."
They were laughing and acting like a pair of teenagers. Reid had never been so carefree with someone before. He could never imagine being so open and lighthearted like this before today, nor around another person. Especially a woman. But Riley was special. Riley was one of a kind.
Riley is still your therapist his thoughts whispered. Don't forget there's a line here. A line you are walking dangerously close to.
"It's not snowing as hard now," Riley said, glancing out the window. "It might not be as hard to travel."
"Yeah," Reid said, hiding his disappointment. "You probably want to get home anyway, you have work to do."
"No!" Riley cried, showing he had gotten the wrong idea. "No, I just meant… maybe we could go for another walk. I… love walking in the snow."
Reid barely forgot anything, but at the moment, he was forgetting how to breathe. Slowly he nodded. "Sure, that would be…"
"Perfection?" she asked, trying to finish his hanging sentence.
"I was going for nice, but perfection works."
She laughed again, losing Reid in the sound.
After paying, they stepped outside. The snowflakes were thick, going in and out of the street lamps as the descended to the earth. Quantico had turned into a winter tundra. Reid pulled his coat closer to him to protect the cold. All he wanted to do was move as quickly as possible and get somewhere warm. As they began their trek through the almost blizzard, he stole a glance at the girl he was lucky enough to be with. Though she looked cold, he could tell she was greatly enjoying the setting that surrounded them. No misery would be enough to pull him away from this.
They began down the streets, every few moments bumping arms with each other. Reid felt nervous at every touch. He wondered if she was expecting him to hold her again. He wanted to. He greatly wanted to, but knew they both were hanging on by a thin thread.
"It wasn't all bad, you know." She voiced, like she'd been reading Reid's thoughts.
"What?" He exclaimed, caught off guard, "What wasn't all bad?"
"I told you before; there are few things I liked about Richardville, like how it snowed every year. I mean… I wouldn't wish what I went through on anyone, but there was a time… when it wasn't too bad. You know, when you're a kid and you're still too young to realize that your life actually sucks."
"Really?" Reid asked.
"Yeah, I think that's another reason why I love winter. My dad and I use to play in it together, when I was really little. Before… things went bad. He lost his job and then my mom's drinking took a bad turn and that led him to drink and to drugs… but before that, he was a pretty okay guy. I think that's why I could never bring myself to hate him. He never really hit me; that was mostly my mother's department."
The continued in silence, Reid watching the fog escape from her lips every time she breathed.
"You know, in a very small way… you remind me of him." She said.
"Really?" Reid was caught off guard at that. Riley didn't know a deeper part from his past.
"Yes," she said. "Well… for one thing, you're different from most of the guys I meet. In a weird way, you're kind of a rebel. And you're smart like him, and you're easy to open up to once you get to know you…"
She trailed off. Reid could have just let it go; she would never have to know. But he wanted to be different with her. He didn't want to lie to her.
"And I have a drug problem." He said quickly.
Riley stopped in her tracks, grabbing his arm to make him stop. Reid was jerked back suddenly, but he expected this. He kept his eyes down at the newly fallen snow, afraid to catch her gaze.
"What?" she cried.
Reid didn't answer. She moved closer to him, trying to be sure what he said was true.
"Spencer… you have a drug problem?"
He nodded, unable to let any words escape through his throat.
"Why… we've spent all this time together and you've never told me?"
"It's one of the reasons the Bureau wanted me to go to therapy." He said quickly.
"Are you… I mean, do you still…"
"I've been sober for a long time." He said. "Over a year. I still go to meetings, especially when…"
"You have cravings," she finished.
Reid still wouldn't look at her. He couldn't see that disappointment, that horror on her face. The same one he had seen so many times, when his friends would find out about this. That he would make such a stupid decision.
"A genius can make stupid mistakes, too, you know." He said watching as the snow fell on his shoes.
"Did I say you were stupid?" she asked. "Look at me."
He was too afraid to, too ashamed. Riley was stubborn, though. She took a step closer to him, brushing his forehead with hers.
"Spencer, I said look at me."
Slowly, he lifted his eyes and met her big brown ones. And then he thought he might cry. They weren't filled with disapproval or fear or ridicule… it was the first time he ever saw reassurance and acceptance after revealing this.
He was going to kiss her. She was the closest she had ever been and he could feel her warm breath on his face. He inhaled the smell of her perfume and shampoo and a slight hint of nicotine. Her hand was still on his arm. He stared as her tongue absent-mindedly moistened her lips. The sight alone was almost enough to drive him over the edge and he desperately wanted to do that to them with his own tongue. He was going to do it. This time, he was.
"This is probably something we should discuss during your session, though." She said, backing away slowly. His eyes never left her lips as she pulled further out of reach. The moment was gone. Part of him hated himself for not going for it… while the other hated himself for wanting to. Again.
"Yeah," he agreed. "I don't know why, but it's easy to confide in you."
That made her smile. "Well, that's a good thing since it's my profession." She paused, glancing down at his chest for a moment while she swallowed… from nerves, maybe? Or maybe it was habit. Her eyes met with his again. "It's easy for me to talk to you, too."
"We should get somewhere warm before we freeze." Reid said. "It won't take long for frost bite to set in if we stand here much longer."
"Well, if you don't want to go home yet," she said. "We can always go to my place. It's not that far from here."
Reid didn't need any convincing. They continued down the street until they got to the busy intersection up ahead. They stood close to each other, waiting for the crosswalk to clear, trying to stay warm.
"These things always take longer when the walker is freezing." She exclaimed, pressing the signal button a few more times, her teeth chattering.
"Actually, that's not true. The cross walks work on the same timer all year round; it just feels longer because we become more comfortable in the cold. It's with the same method that you're always interrupted with something you hate when you're having fun, but it just seems more abundant because those are the times you remember most."
Riley laughed at that. "I know, I was kidding!" she exclaimed.
He should have realized that, suddenly embarrassed. "I… knew that. No, I did."
Now they were both laughing, Riley's gloved hands holding onto his arms to prevent losing her balance. In turn, Reid's hands found their way to her hips for extra support. She didn't seem to mind.
As their laughter died down, they found themselves in each other's arms, smiling, staring into each other's eyes. The snow fell around them like they were figurines in a snow globe.
Reid could never have guessed it would happen next. To his surprise, Riley reached up what little height distance there was and quickly pressed her lips to his, barely enough to make an impact. Just as quick as it happened, it was over and she pulled away.
"I'm sorry!" she exclaimed, appalled at what she had done. "I don't know why I did that!"
"It's okay," Reid said, not really sure what had happened. He looked for a change of subject. "The light's changed."
They began across the walk, Riley keeping her distance from him. What was he doing? He should have pulled her to him and given her a real kiss, a kiss that said what she meant to him. But with this came a new question: Did she have feelings for him, too?
Despite her new respect of his personal space, Reid moved close once again. His hand found her hand and he continued with her to her apartment.
…
The rest of the walk didn't take long, even in the snow. They made it to Riley's building and trekked up the five flights to her floor.
"How do you manage this every day?" he asked, trying to catch his breath.
At the landing, she began digging through her bag for her keys. "You get use to it. Believe me, I can't wait until I can afford a place with an elevator, but… I've got loans to pay off before that dream comes true. Actually, I'm pretty lucky to be living here as it is."
Her door lead to the corner apartment and Riley lead him inside where it was dark and cold. Quickly, she flipped on the light to reveal a moderate amount of space. It was pretty average, similar to Reid's. He looked around her room, where books were stacked upon books on her book shelves. He moved to see the titles, expecting different psychology and medical books. To his surprise, they were all fiction. Some were fairly new, others were from classic writers like Dickens and Bronte, the complete works of Poe. And, he noticed, an up-to-date collection of Stephen King.
What wall space wasn't covered with shelves had a few more musical posters on them, mostly Webber, but a Sondheim was seen in a few places. These, too were an off white color. A small stereo sat on a table near the couch, nothing fancy.
"No television?" he asked.
"There's one in the bedroom," she called from the kitchen. "I don't watch it much, just when I can't sleep. Or if Conan O'Brien has a particularly intriguing guest." She finished, emerging back into the living room. "Now," she said. "I'm making coffee. I tried to make it about half as strong as usual. I don't really have the money to replace the carpet."
"You're never going to let me live that down, are you?" he asked.
She shook her head, trying not to laugh too hard. Reid stepped away from her, back to his examination of the books. She went over to stand with him. Intrigued, he picked up a copy of The Collector.
"I starting this collection when I was about eleven. Impressed?" she asked.
"Very," he replied. He remembered this book, from years ago, searching for The Fisher King. "I had to use this book once in order to find where a man was keeping an imprisoned girl."
"You're kidding? Appropriate choice, too. That's what this book's about. It's actually kind of creepy, the way he's obsessed with Miranda. Have you read it?"
Reid shook his head. "It wouldn't take long for you, though," she continued. She took the book from his hands and opening the pages. "I don't know how you do it. Even if I could read that fast, I wouldn't."
"What do you mean?" Reid inquired.
"I wouldn't have any time to enjoy the story." She said, looking up at him. "After a few chapters, I need time to mull over what I read, to try and figure out what's going to happen, then go back and see if I'm right."
"You know, I love to read," He said, "But I've never known anyone who loves it as much as you."
Surprisingly, they had managed to move as close as they had been on the street corner without holding each one another again. Smiling, Riley set the book back onto its shelf. "Thanks," she finally said. "Most men just think I'm too intellectual… or weird."
"You're not weird." Reid whispered. "You're amazing."
She blushed, locking eyes with him again. "I think the cold may have affected the circulation to your brain, Dr. Reid." She said.
"Why did you kiss me before?" he asked softly.
The smile left Riley's face. Her gaze went downward as she answered. "I already told you, I don't know." She swallowed again, and Reid knew this time it was from nerves. "I told you I was sorry."
"I'm not," he answered, putting his face closer to hers, his forehead brushing her bangs.
Again, she swallowed, her eyes still avoiding his. Her tongue absent-mindedly moistened her lips again. "Maybe this wasn't such a good idea."
"Riley," he whispered. Now it was his turn. "Look at me."
At first, she didn't respond. He stood, waiting her out, until finally here brown eyes met his hazel once more.
Reid did it before he lost his nerve. His hand found her cheek as he leaned down; his lips finally meeting hers; he kissed her softly. She uttered a gentle moan as she kissed him back, her own tender hands finding their way to his waist.
Their kiss broke and, before either even opened their eyes, another took its place. Her arms wound around his neck as his hands went to her hips, pulling her against him. She moaned again, just as contented, as their warm bodies pressed against each other. The intensity grew as Reid's tongue found its way into her mouth. Her response to that was sucking on it softly and Reid began to lose all train of thought. He didn't care who she was or what this would mean in the morning. He was in love with Riley and would take any consequence, as long as he got to have her.
Riley moaned again, but from discomfort. Quickly, she pulled away from him. "No," she said, catching her breath. "Spencer, you need to leave."
A little dazed, Reid looked at her questioningly. He didn't respond; he didn't know how. Simply, he waited for an explanation.
"Please, you need to leave."
Reid took a deep breath. "You want me to leave." He clarified. "Do you really want me to leave?"
"Of course I don't want you leave!" Riley exclaimed. "I want this as much as you do. I've wanted this for a long time."
"Me too," he added.
She caught his stare, surprised as well as overjoyed. "Really?" she asked.
He nodded, catching her lips again. Another kiss commenced, Riley's hands went to the back of his neck. Reid was just about to wrap her in his arms again when she pushed away.
"No, Spencer, no. We can't do this. You have to leave."
"Riley-" he began, trying to stay calm.
"No, I'm sorry, but this can't happen. It can't! I shouldn't have let it get this far! I can't take advantage of you." She backed away from him so he couldn't pull her into another kiss.
"You're not taking advantage of me. Riley, I know what I'm doing here." He tried moving closer, but that just pushed her farther away.
"It doesn't matter, it's still my responsibility. And that responsibility is telling me to stop this and saying you have to leave."
"What about you?" he asked. Reid wasn't giving her up without a fight. "This isn't what you want."
She wouldn't answer, backing away more. Reid kept moving after her. "Riley, if you want to me to go, I will. I won't hold anything against you."
Tears were glistening in her eyes now. "Please," she said. "Stop being a gentleman, you're making it harder to throw you out."
"That's a contradiction, Riley. If I wasn't a gentleman, you wouldn't be able to throw me out."
"Want a bet?" she asked.
"Riley," he urged, completely serious. "Tell me what you really want, because I don't think this is it. If you want me to leave, I will go. I will go and we'll move on and we'll never mention or think of this again. But if you want me to stay, you only have to say so. You're not forcing me to do anything."
Riley couldn't answer. She was still breathing deeply and Reid could see she was shaking. He wanted to reach for her, but knew she had to make the decision on her own. He couldn't convince her anymore at this point.
"Alright," he said, "I'll go."
Grabbing his coat and things, he headed for the door. Without bothering to look back or even say goodbye, he opened it and headed out into the hallway, not bothering to close it behind him. Beginning to accept defeat, Reid made his way to the stairs.
"Stay!" a voice cried from behind him.
He froze in his tracks, barely able to believe it. He turned and found Riley standing in the doorway, calling after him.
"Stay," she cried again. The tears were falling down her cheeks now. "Please stay."
Reid turned and took Riley in his arms again, moving back inside. He kissed her once again and she didn't dare fight him. He held her trembling body close to his own and knew he was shaking, too. Reid had never been with anyone like her before.
The front door closed and the heat began to rise. Riley had lost all inhibitions. Reid emitted his own moan of pleasure as her tongue now found its way into his mouth. She pushed his body away from hers just enough for her hands to start undoing each button on his dress shirt. She took her time with the process. Finally, she pushed the fabric off his shoulders and led her lips down his neck. He growled at the feel of them as she moved them along his chest. Her hands ran across his stomach sending a shudder through him.
Her mouth went back to his and after another kissed, she smiled into them. "You're lips are even softer than I imagined." She whispered.
Reid smiled as well. They kissed again, his hands going to her waist, untucking her blouse from the hem of her skirt. His hands slipped underneath and up her back, finding the clasp of her bra, spending more than a moment on unhooking it.
"I still haven't quite gotten the hang of these things," he said while her lips went to work on his ear.
"Neither have I and I've been wearing them for seventeen years."
"That doesn't exactly inspire me with a lot of confidence," he replied.
She laughed, pressing her nose into his cheek, and his laughter went along with her. As the hook finally came loose, he lifted her blouse over her head and started kissing her neck, leaving her black lace bra barely hanging on. As his lips went to her shoulder, she grabbed him by the waist of his pants, pulling him into her bedroom, and the door cut them off from the outside world.
